Diary of the Crazy Shaniqua Bello

Log Forty-five: JERICHO

FORTY-FIVE
JERICHO

Tuesday

3:48 pm

Dear, Diary

I'm sure all these ladies coming and going out of this bathroom are wondering if I work here and I'm taking rooster of who comes in and who goes out or whether I'm just plain crazy? And I don't blame them at all, I mean I'd think the same thing if I walked into a coffee shop ladies' bathroom feeling pressed and I see some weird-looking girl writing in a book— that's by the way sha, I don't, I don't know...I don't I don't know...and I don't give a damn...I don't give a damn damn ddddddd—or whatever that funny lady on Youtube said. Gosh! It must be all the shit inhalation because what am I saying?

Anyway!

I raked a sister and just like the wall of Jericho: she fell down flat. And everyone gasped for a second in unison as they did in a movie, only to end up applauding me when they confirmed that the ex wasn't completely dead.

Elvis just kept watching with his eyes wide open like he was having a spiritual epiphany.

The ex was catching her breath and whatever was left of her dignity when I snatched off her wig and descended on her with my knees glued to her chest.

"Are you mad? Answer me, I SAID, are you mad Abi is it cheap crack?, because I don't understand why you'll just pounce publicly on someone you don't even know!"

"You're the one pouncing" she struggled out of her mouth and I almost grew weak in laughter.

"Shaniqua—it's enough." I finally heard Elvis say and I threw him a sudden look that made him retreat behind me in evident fear.

"It wasn't enough when she was pulling my wig, sir?"

"I'm just...I'm just saying we're still expecting the client. This is very embarrassing—we'll address it later. This deal is far too important."

"Wait— this animal works for you?" The woman beneath me croaked out, making me deepen my knees in.

"This animal was his PA—,"

"IS, his PA, nobody's firing anyone Shaniqua, just let her go," he pleaded and I threw them one last deadly look each before grunting off.

"Thank you." I heard him say right after I got up before he started lashing at his ex for her actions. I kept hearing words like, "you deserved it...it was about time...this is the second time you'll be making such a scene."

Oh wow!

The restaurant cleaners are beginning to peak into the bathroom suspiciously.

I've got to go now.

Shaniqua the fighter

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