FOURTEEN
RUMORS
01/01/2022
New Year's Day
6:09 pm
Dear Diary
I'm having the time of my life.
How did I go from sleeping in my father's house to riding in a celebrity's car?
Aremo dropped me off at the mall and told me he was going to drive around until I was ready to leave.
It sounded super strange to me Abebi—things like that only happen in the movies.
...
6:25 pm
I walked into the mall and the most beautiful floral dress caught my attention but the price sent me tumbling down—I mean, who sells a simple A-line dress for 334,400 naira? One dress! My mother's bride price wasn't even up to that.
"I'll just check something else out," I said, smiling at the attendant.
"Wait! Shaniqua?" I heard my name from the lips of the attendant and paused.
"Sorry, do I know you?" I asked most condescendingly. The thing is that spending hours in a lush car, acquiring a new iPhone, visiting the RMD, and holding a golden credit card could mess the brain of a gutter rat like myself—I admit.
"It's me—Ilerioluwa Badamosi" okay, she really didn't age well cos what's with all the wrinkles and pimples—and was she from my secondary school or uni?
I squinted my eyes and said a quick word of prayer before saying, "Unilag 2017?"
"Yes! Mass communication!" She squealed excitedly and went ahead to pull me into a hug and it was then that I began to gather my memories of the tiny tiny Ilerioluwa and her awkward hugs. "It's been ages! Rumor has it that you went a little..." she began to giggle.
"I thought you died as well." I popped my eyes out with a look of concern.
"What?" She asked, looking confused as hell.
"Yeah—I remember everyone talking about how you died of AIDS and all." I pressed on. She wasn't going to call me crazy and expect me to let it slide.
"Me! Die of AIDS?"
"I guess it's all rumors or what do you think?" I asked in a sarcastic tone and watched as she fell for it as usual. Classic Ilerioluwa.
"Crazy people everywhere" she rolled her eyes and took hold of my hand. "Come, I'll take you where we keep all our premium collections; all these are what we like to call click baits for the 'exquisite women'."
And my Dear Bebi, that's how I got the same floral dress at an affordable price for merely being sarcastic.
It's beginning to look like a very good New Year.
Bye for now
Shaniqua
Vote
Vote
Vote
Thank you!
If you don't know how to vote, click on that star below and see what happens.
And yeah, follow me on Instagram
@cinmithewriter
YOU ARE READING
Diary of the Crazy Shaniqua Bello
HumorShaniqua Bello is a 24 year old graduate navigating through life in the busy city of Lagos and THIS is her diary.
