Bates Motel: My Experience

Off My Chest

I mindlessly ate the bacon and toast Norma made for me. Emma and Norman ate a little too. Norma just drank her coffee.

"I'm going down to the office," Norman stated.

Norma slowly looked over him. "Ok honey," she drawled.

After a while, Norma told us she was going to go upstairs and take a bath. I told Emma I wanted to check on Dylan and she said she would walk with me and go to the office.

The room was open and I heard arguing before a "GET OUT!"

Norman backed out and I stepped in. He gave me a look and he strided to the office. I stood in the threshold. Dylan was standing there shirtless, with his back to me. His hands were on his head. "I told you to GET OU-"

He turned and noticed it was me. My eyes had started to water the slightlest bit. "Oh," he lowered his voice. "I thought you were Norman." He sat on the edge of the bed. I closed the door and sat next to him on the bed.

"How are you?" I stupidly asked.

He smirked and shook his head. But he wasn't smirking in a laughing way. He looked at me. "What do you think?" His eyes looked red and glossy. I looked down and he spoke, "Well I need to go get some fresh clothes and take a shower." He nodded his head in the direction of the house.

"Then what?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Go to work I guess."

My stomach churned. I wanted to cry. "I was hoping we could talk."

"I don't know what to say to you," he replied.

Ugh. Why did this feel like a breakup? We weren't even official.

"I'm gonna go take a shower," he said. He stood, snatched his dirty t-shirt and walked out the door, leaving me sitting on the bed alone.

Tears started streaming and I stood also. I watched him walk up to the house. I needed to talk to him and find out what's going through his mind...if he's going to be ok.

I closed the door and sat back down on the bed. I curled up and cupped my hands around my face. I tried to fight the tears. I needed to stay strong. Dylan was the one who should be breaking down. I got myself under control and used the bathroom. After I washed my hands, I just stood in the mirror glaring at myself; my messy red hair, my puffy, watery eyes. I took a deep breathe and left the bathroom. I opened the motel door, stepped out, took another deep breath of fresh air, and closed it behind me. Ever so slowly, I treaded back to the house. I wanted to give him time to get a shower; time to change. I needed to talk to him, tell him what's on my mind before I burst.

I let myself in, sitting on the couch in the living room to wait. It wasn't long before I heard him stomping down the steps. I then heard swift moving steps coming from another direction. The footsteps stopped and I listened in a little bit. I heard low voices before I heard Norma ask loudly, "What does that mean?"

"Leave me alone, Norma," I heard Dylan say louder.

Quickly, I got off the couch and hurried into the hall where they were arguing. Dylan was trying to get to the door and Norma wouldn't let him through. "Stop it! Move!" Dylan demanded.

"What does that mean?!" She strained her voice.

Dylan stopped. I couldn't see his face; I was behind him. Norma barely even glanced over at me. Dylan's voice sounded shaky. "You used me to get out of your house. You got knocked up by your brother and rather than having an abortion, you used me to get your boyfriend to marry you." He sniffed and I knew at that point he was crying. Norma's eyes started swimming with tears as did mine as I watched. "You made him think that I was his. You brought me into this world using me...knowing what I was, not caring, just thinking about yourself!"

A small noise escaped Norma's mouth. "Dylan, it wasn't like that, you have to believe me," she pleaded. They both sniffed. "I was so scared, you have no idea. I..I..I had no one to protect me, I was a little girl, I was a kid, my father scared the crap out of me. My mother was sedated all the time, my brother would not leave me alone. I had to get away! I had no voice to tell him not to do it! I had no power to stop him! I wanted to stop him, God knows I wanted to stop him! I wanted to tell him to leave me alone." She started breaking down more. Her tears were streaming down her cheeks. "I wanted to tell him, I wanted to tell him to leave me alone," she cried through a cracking voice. She whined, trying to keep herself under control. "None of this is your fault. It's not your fault, but it's not my fault either." She sniffed between each sentence. "I was a child, I was way younger than your brother is now!"

Dylan sniffed before he told her to move away from the door. She pleaded with her eyes. "No," she stated. "No...."

"MOVE AWAY FROM THE DAMN DOOR!" Dylan bellowed. Norma at that point looked frightened, and unwillingly moved out of his way. He flung open the door and though my legs felt like concrete attached to the floor, I had to run after him. He was already most of the way down the steps. "Dylan!" I called, but he didn't look back. This was a replay of last night. "DYLAN!" I screamed and jumped down the steps. I hurried as fast as I could to catch up with him. "Dylan WAIT!" I told him. Finally, he slowed down enough for me to catch him at his truck door. His eyes were red and tears stained his cheeks. I was crying too. I was so hurt for him and hurt by him that he would run away from me.

"Dylan I need to talk to you."

"Why?" he asked in a small voice. I could tell he was choking with tears.

I grabbed both of his forearms and sternly looked him in the eye. "Dylan." We kept eye contact and I took a deep breathe. I was scared, and I knew it sounded crazy, but it was true. I finally told him, stuttering a little at first.

"I love you."