To celebrate this book hitting 20k reads, I have decided to come out of hiatus for a minute and release another chapter. Thank you all so much 🖤
Also, The Show was phenomenal and well worth the money! What were some of your favourite stages?
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These days the mood around is quieter than usual. Fatigue has hit the crew and the members, even high spirited Lisa who makes everyone laugh. Over a month of touring has finished with only a couple of weeks left to go. You're happy because this means that you and Chaeyoung will soon be free to spend more time together. At the same time, however, sad because she'll be flying back to South Korea and it'll be a while before you can see her again. That's probably going to hurt. The thought of not being able to see her everyday saddens you. However, just being with Chaeyoung is a privilege in itself, so you know you can't be picky with the situation.
Today, the tour is in Atlanta, Georgia. One of the biggest music capitals of America, known for its booming hip-hop and R&B scene. In addition to this, Atlanta is also famous for its other genres including indie-rock, gospel, neo-soul, punk, metal, and live music. In the early 20th century, Atlanta was the major centre for country, classical/opera, and blues music. Many well-known modern artists have originated from here such as Ludacris, John Mayer, Usher, 6LACK, Ciara, Donald Glover, TLC, B.o.B, Migos, Kanye West, 2 Chainz, Lil Nas X, and the list goes on. Even Eric Nam, a Korean singer/songwriter/host was born and raised in Atlanta before jump-starting his career in South Korea. So naturally, the tour will stay here for a couple of days in the music capital before moving on.
Expanding the image of a music group in a city like Atlanta is vital as there are many true lovers of music there. You think about this as you sit in the waiting room outside the booth of yet another radio interview. "You're listening to Atlanta's Power 96.1. Atlanta's #1 Hit Music Station!" The female host's voice projects through the speakers of Sam's phone since he pulled it up for everyone to listen. "I'm here with the record-breaking, world-famous, talented, beautiful, totally badass, Kpop sensation — Blackpink! How y'all feelin' today ladies?" The girls' laughter can be heard in the background. When you glance up to watch through the window, you see them shifting in their chairs and adjusting their headsets. Chaeyoung's smile brightens when you catch her eye and you immediately return it. She then returns her gaze to the host as they begin a conversation.
Chaeyoung looks so pretty today. She wears a light gray wool sweater with the sleeves hiding most of her hands, and dark ripped jeans. Her long hair is pulled back into a cute high ponytail. Chaeyoung said she didn't put much effort into her appearance since the interview would be voice-only, but you would definitely say otherwise. If anything, she gets even more beautiful when she's not trying.
As the radio host talks about the tour with the girls, another awkward sensation arrives from the feeling of Sam's gaze. The air's been tense between you since Newark when you both fought and later on when he, oddly enough, pretended to be your boyfriend. Thus resulting in a drunk and very much jealous Alina pounding on your hotel door in the middle of the night while Chaeyoung was also present. It was a mess that you just narrowly escaped. You weren't keen on repeating such an ordeal — Alina's eyes staring daggers in the back of your head every time you went near Sam didn't help either, so naturally, your distance was kept. However, now it's been going on for longer than you'd like. You miss your best friend.
You glance up to meet Sam's eyes, but they flick away to avoid being caught. It doesn't matter since you already felt them. Thoughts circulate in your head of topics to talk about, but nothing comes to mind. Finally, you settle for the new watch on his wrist.
"That's a really nice watch, is it new?" You ask. Sam realizes you're talking to him and looks down at the watch on his left wrist.
"Oh-uh thanks. No, it's not." He replies. You nod your head in understanding to appear polite. You hate this — you hate this so much.
"Really? It's just that I've never seen you wear it before." You're trying anything to keep the conversation going. Sam rubs the nape of his neck. He is talking to you but isn't quite meeting your eyes.
"That's because I never wore it on tour 'till today."
"Oh."
And with that, the two of you go back to awkward silence. However, Tanya seems to have had enough of the whole thing.
"Okay, what the hell is up with you two?' She asks. Her raised tone makes you glance up again. 'Did you have a big fight? I can feel the tension all the way over here, it's like choking me."
"No we didn't—" you stop when you realize that Sam is speaking at the same time as you are. A burning feeling crosses your cheeks.
"Okay...' Tanya slowly says. 'There are only two possible explanations here as to why you're acting so weird around each other. One, you had a big fight and don't know how to get past it."
"We didn't fight—" Sam adds but Tanya brings up her pointer finger.
"I wasn't finished. The second possible explanation could be... that, well..." Your eyes narrow as you try to understand where Tanya is going with this.
"Well—what?" You ask. A hint of a smile is on Tanya's lips.
"I mean, there had to be a reason as to why you've been acting so differently lately Y/N." She eyes you knowingly. Except that's the problem, you have no idea what the heck she's talking about.
"Different? How am I any different?"
Tanya raises her hands and stares at you wide-eyed. "Hello? You look like you should be in a girl-crush music video — you're wearing a freaking skirt!" You glance down at your skirt and immediately smoothen the pleated fabric. This morning while choosing an outfit, you remembered how much Chaeyoung loves when you wear dresses and skirts — apparently, there's something attractive about a bodyguard dressed in something other than a black uniform, so you decided on wearing a short skirt with a pretty top to match. Your hair was tied half up and half down, and some makeup was applied to highlight your charms. Chaeyoung beamed like the sun when she saw you and shamelessly flirted all morning long.
"So? It's hot out today." You retaliate. Tanya scoffs and shakes her head.
"It doesn't matter. You hate wearing skirts and dresses. Lord forbid high heels too, but I'll give you a pass on those boots. In fact, I have never seen you wear this much makeup in a week before!"
"Tastes change.' You mutter while crossing your arms, feeling defensive. 'What's your point?"
"My point is that those kinds of changes don't just happen overnight, and they especially don't happen on their own. It comes from a big reason, and I believe that the said reason is sitting right next to you." Tanya replies with a grin, she points to Sam's general direction. You blink as blood rushes to your face. "Oh come on you two,' Tanya waves her hand in dismissal and chuckles. 'It had to have happened at some point—"
"Okay! Now, hold on a minute.' You bring up a hand for pause. 'What had to have happened? We've told you guys a million times. There's—"
"Nothing going on between you two.' Kevin finishes. He chuckles and leans his weight on his left armrest. 'We've heard that one many times before, haven't we?" Kevin turns to Tommy and Tanya on his left while asking. The latter chuckle and agree in unison. You stare at them, dumbfounded at the situation.
"Are you all seriously ganging up on us right now? Oh, Mohan... not you too?" You turn to your right and face him. High disbelief is in your tone. Mohan shakes his head at you and shifts in his seat uncomfortably, however, a sneaky smirk is on his face as he glances towards the older members. Kevin, Tommy, and Tanya all burst into laughter at Mohan's silent confession.
"I knew it!' Kevin calls. 'Look, it's about time that you two finally got over whatever little game you've been playing and finally grow up. This ain't high school anymore. If you like each other, just say it!"
"But we don't! We don't like each other in that way.' You attempt but your teammates continue to laugh. 'We're friends guys, come on!" By now, the burning feeling in your face feels like a fever. The embarrassment isn't helping at all. If only they knew who was the true cause of your changed behaviour. Only one person isn't against you here, but he is no help. You turn to your left where Sam sits, holding a hand to his mouth and chuckling. He immediately straightens up when he sees you, already knowing how scary you can be when you're angry. "And you!' You yell. 'Why aren't you saying anything?"
"Because the man wants to tell the truth. You two don't have to hide it anymore. We support your relationship!" Kevin answers. You've had enough of this.
"Okay, you know what?' You reply and stand up. The chair scratches the floor as it's pushed back. 'You're all being very rude. Whatever the hell you think is going on between me and Sam — you're wrong. We work together! Don't you know how inappropriate that is?"
I'm such a hypocrite.
"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to the bathroom. I don't want to hear another word about this ever again!" And with that, you march out of the room and stomp your way down the hall to find a bathroom. You don't actually have to use it, but rather need a place to cool down. It takes about five minutes for you to actually find one, and by the time you do, all the built-up frustration dissipates and turns into sheer embarrassment. Thankfully nobody else is in the room. You pace back and forth in front of the stalls, lost in thought.
It seems that everyone and their mother believes you and Sam should become a couple. The thought only annoys you: where were they back when you were actually single? Why is it that whenever one finally gets in a relationship, everyone else suddenly gets the courage to try and ruin it?
You lean against a sink, cross your arms, and sigh. It's not like they have any idea of who you're actually with. They don't know about your relationship with Chaeyoung, and even if they did, they won't believe it until Chaeyoung comes forth herself. Come to think of it, nobody will believe you until she admits it too. And who knows how long that'll take? If the cards are played right, hopefully by around this time next year you'll be open about your relationship with the public, especially to your friends and family. Until then, however, you'll have to deal with the raised suspicion and occasional teasing.
So far, you haven't been dealing with it very well. You immediately became defensive when Tanya brought up the suggestion of you and Sam, which only made them more suspicious. Stomping out of the room like a little kid didn't help either. They're all probably still laughing their heads off. To make matters worse, you preached about how a relationship in a workplace is inappropriate when your secretive actions obviously state otherwise.
An older lady opens the door to the bathroom and proceeds to enter a stall. You sigh and exit; you have to get back at some point. Chaeyoung might worry seeing that you've been gone for so long.
After entering the hallway again, another thought crosses your mind: why the hell didn't Sam say anything? He became quiet after mentions of a relationship.
Because the man wants to tell the truth. You two don't have to hide it anymore. We support your relationship!
Tell the truth? You know that you've been completely honest with Sam about how you feel, but has he been doing the same? Could there actually be any secret feelings on his behalf? Seriously, what is going on in his brain?
"Y/N..." a hand taps your shoulder from behind.
"Wahh!" You immediately grab the hand and turn.
"Ow — wait... it's me!" Sam yells in pain as you twist his arm behind his back. You drop the attack after realizing who it is.
"Oh shit. Sorry, habit of mine." You explain. Another blush crosses your cheeks, he was the last thing you were just thinking about.
Sam rubs his upper arm and frowns from the pain. "Man,' he chuckles. 'Sometimes I forget how tough you are."
"Yeah, well, you don't just sneak up on me like that. Not unless you want to get knocked out."
Sam laughs even more and nods his head. His hair isn't combed over today but rather falls in waves over his forehead, giving him a boyish look. The black t-shirt he wears looks tighter than usual on his muscular figure. You can't help but look at him in that way, to secretly analyze his behaviour and wonder where his true intentions lie. The taller guy sighs and straightens up. "Look,' he slowly says. 'I know things have been weird with us lately. But I just wanted to say that I'm sorry... for everything really."
"For everything?"
"Yeah, everything. The boyfriend thing in front of Alina wasn't cool. I get it, you got weirded out and I'm sure that's why you've been keeping your distance. Today was worse because I didn't defend you in front of the others, and they got even more suspicious. I should have said something... but if it makes you feel any better, I talked to them right after you left. I told them there really was nothing going on and that they should leave you alone."
You smile as Sam speaks and feel your heart swell in size. Nothing ever had to be complicated with him, you were the one jumping around to conclusions.
"The boyfriend thing was a little weird,' you admit. 'But I wasn't weirded out that much. I was keeping my distance because of Alina. She took you very seriously and actually came up to my room later on that night."
"Shit, really?" Sam asks as his eyes widen.
"Yeah."
"Oh man, what happened? Are you okay?" Sam places a hand on your shoulder, his eyes anchored on yours.
"Yeah, I'm okay. But Sam, she was drunk. She pounded on my door with a fist until I finally opened it and then demanded to be let in."
"And you let her?"
"I did. She came in and kept asking me questions about you. I didn't know what to say — I wanted her off my back but there was no way she was leaving without an answer. She... fuck..." Sam tightens his grip on your shoulder.
"Did she try something?" His voice is firm as he asks. You sigh before answering.
"Yeah, she tried to kiss me like you said. But it was more like an attack. She pushed me against the wall and everything. You'd think I would be stronger in a situation like that." You cross your arms and frown.
"No,' Sam says. 'Don't put that kind of crap on yourself. I'm sure you did the best you could. What happened next?"
You stare at the space between your feet and his, wondering whether to include the part about Chaeyoung or not. A heavyweight burdens your chest. Sam's been nothing but honest with you and here you are doing the opposite, but how exactly do you just drop a bomb like this on him? You can't say a word yet even if you wanted to. No, not until the tour is over.
"I pushed her off and slapped her. Hard. It took a lot of talking and some tears... but she eventually left, and this time, for good. I never truly answered her question so she probably still thinks that you and I are together. That's why I kept my distance. It was out of respect."
Sam nods and lets his hand fall. "Yeah, that girl hasn't been looking good lately. Now I get why... hey, I'm really sorry. If it weren't for me, none of this would have happened." You smile at his words and place a hand on his back, leading him back to the radio room.
"To be honest with you,' you reply as the two of you walk the hall. 'I'm kind of grateful for it."
Sam studies your gaze. "Really?" He asks. You hum in reply.
"Mmhmm. Was it emotionally exhausting? Definitely, but I'm finally free from my ex. It feels like I can breathe again — like I can truly be happy."
"Wow, I'm so glad to hear that.' A grin crosses Sam's mouth. 'I wish you would have told me though. You've had to deal with this shit for a while now and here I am being a total jerk today." You shake your head and stop walking.
"I was the one being a jerk lately. I shouldn't have been ignoring you." You say.
"Guess we're both idiots then that need to learn how to communicate." He replies, earning a laugh from you. Sam's smile widens as he watches you. There's a hint of wistfulness in his eyes. "Hey, I'm sorry." He apologizes yet again. You grin and raise your arms.
"Give me a hug and we'll be okay."
If there was one word you could attribute to your relationship with Sam, it would have to be: stable. His friendship has always been something you could rely on, something you've always been grateful for. His wrapped arms are protective and the feeling of his chest is warm. He makes you feel safe in a way that others cannot. Chaeyoung may be your girlfriend, but that doesn't mean you'll disregard your long and special friendship with Sam. It would be stupid of you to treat him any lesser than he deserves.
Your cheek rests against his chest. "I've missed you." You quietly say. Sam isn't usually one for a heart to heart chat, but this time, he allows the feeling.
"I've missed you too," Sam confesses.
Something doesn't feel right. You hear a shuffling nearby that pauses in their tracks. "Oh..." her voice is heard. Letting go of Sam, you turn your head and Chaeyoung comes into view. She had turned a corner of the hallway and stopped walking when she saw the two of you. For some reason, you feel the need to step back from Sam as Chaeyoung glances between your distance.
"Miss Park,' Sam breaks the silence. 'What're you doing out here alone? Someone should have escorted you." Chaeyoung blinks and then gives her head a quick shake before replying.
"We're on a break so I-uh... came out here to use the bathroom. They told me that two of my guards were already out here so I figured I'd be okay finding at least one of you.' She glances at you standing behind Sam and a feeling drops from your chest to the pit of your stomach. 'But it seems that I've been lucky enough to find the both of you together."
This looks suspicious as hell. How could it not? Internally, you're groaning at the future argument you know you'll have.
"Sam,' you finally speak up. 'It's alright. I'll escort Miss Park to the bathroom. You can go back to the radio room." Sam glances between you and Chaeyoung. Hopefully, he isn't noticing the obvious tension in the air.
"Oh okay, I'll just be on my way then. See you there." Sam gives Chaeyoung a nod and proceeds down the hall before turning the corner. As soon as he's out of view, Chaeyoung watches you while crossing her arms. You stand there for an awkward moment, not sure how to handle the situation.
"Babe—" you start but Chaeyoung interrupts as she moves forward.
"Not here. Let's go."
Your girlfriend doesn't even give you a chance to reply as she walks past. You sigh and turn, following her down the hall, and mentally prepare yourself for what's to come.
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Lmfao I had to.