It was dark already. The sun was once again hiding behind the buildings. I sighed getting on the bus. I found a seat the back where i could listen to my music in peace. I pressed shuffle and quickly closed my eyes. Thinking.
The bus reached the stop and i scrambled off. I was the last person and it was night time. Not many people were going here, it's a quiet street i guess.
I ran upstairs, fumbling around in my pocket for keys.My hands shook as i opened the door.Homey air. Warm air.
My heart soared. I smiled absentmindedly. But in the air, i could sense unhappiness tainting the house. Bookshelves shaped the room. Fat spined books crammed on to the shelves, picture frames decorated surfaces and plants were silhouetted in the Windows.
Peace.
My hands traced the books as i wondered to jeewoos room.I looked around. Mums room at the end. The bathroom, dowoons, then my old room. I felt a sadness, that things would never be normal. It took 5 years to get to a sort of normal again. But with me not here, I'm surprised my hair inst grey.I knocked on the door, waiting for movement. I heard a shuffling and a groan.
"J-jisung" jeewoo looked shocked.
"Yeah" i said looking at him simply.
"You did come" he smiled tears shining in his eyes.
"You doubted me?" I chuckled. Jeewoo ushed me into the living room so we could sit and talk
"I wanted to check up on you" i sighed taking a seat opposite him."Sorry for the inconvenience" he murmured fiddling with the strings of his hoodie.
"Family is never an inconvenience," I said flatly.
"Family is important" He bit the inside of his cheek, a family habit, that jeewoo did more than any of us.
"And so is health" I looked at his pale features. His face was fin, abnormal. It had seemed like he hadn't smiled in days.
"You haven't been eating properly" He grimaced.
"I was just hoping dowoon gets enough food and is safe..." He trailed off.I sighed and shook my head.
"I know you worry about money. But money shouldn't be your concern. You are no use to dowoon when you're sick." I said softly. He grimaced, his lower lip shaking slightly.
"I'm just so stressed" jeewoo broke. Tears now streaming down his face. I got up and sat beside him.
"Its gonna be okay. It's not gonna be as bad as before" i said softly pulling him into a hug.
"I-i know" he sobbed.
"But I'm paranoid. I just want dowoon to be okay." He whispered.
"He's at an after school club.
I wanted him to take up a thing he'd enjoy. And at this time id usually, be working I didn't want him in the house by himself." Jeewoo sniffed into my shoulder.My heart dropped. He's too paranoid. He hasn't been eating properly at all. I needed him to understand that he was safe. After a while, he stopped crying and had calmed down.
"Right. You're gonna listen to me." I took him by his shoulders and guided him to the dining table. I planted him down in a seat. My phone started ringing, but I simply cancelled the call without looking at the id. I needed to focus on jeewoo.
"Right." I smiled as he looked up at me his eyes red.
"Cut down hours at work." I said going into the kitchen. He nodded wordlessly.
"So you can eat and not stress" I took down some noodles and started looked at the fridge. I smiled slightly. He had stocked it up. I was surprised that he even placed an onion in there which I knew he despised but only ate them because mum told him to.
"I'm making noodles come help" i said getting out The vegetables and started cutting.Jeewoo hummed and got up from the chair.
"I think you should take your own advise," I said watching him fill up a jug with water.
"What" he looked at me, eyes furrowed.
"Hobbies jeewoo. Hobbies." I laughed.He looked confused. "Like...like cooking" a. Light bulb went off in his head, and he brandished the knife to prove a point."Hey watch where you're putting that knife" i yelled worried that he would shove it up my nose.
"Yes jeewoo cooking is a hobby" i said as i began to make the source.
"I don't have a hobby" he huffed. I sighed. That was a lie. I know he played basketball. But it's like how he read twilight for the plot. He never saw it. He did like reading.
"Not as much as you do" he would always say. But i saw him reading the old vet stories at the library and he seemed to be enjoying himself. Then i clicked. Animals. Jeewoo had once been dragged away from the zoo crying, and he had to pet every dog he saw.I quickly turned to him grinning at my plan.
"Don't look at me like that i don't like that look you swine" he said unnerved at my actions.
"What's your favourite animal" i asked quickly.He sighed putting down a spoon.
"I think otters are pretty cool" he went off into dreamland and mutterings of facts about them. I sighed. I'm not getting an otter.
"I mean like cat or dog?" He broke from his trance and thought. "I don't know. I like cats. I like dogs. But i like dogs. They are nice." He started again.
"I like a breed, they often get misunderstood for being violent and horrible, but they are friendly and good with children and are protective-"Just as i thought. He already had one picked. He must of been reading up on them for years.
"Perfect." I grinned, mixing the noodles. He furrowed his eyebrows.
"What are you up to?" He questioned. I smiled giving him a knowing look. His eyes winded and a small smile appeared.
"Really" He whispered. I nodded.
"What about it?" I grinned. He nodded. But then his smiled faulted.
"I'll have to look after it..." He didn't mean it in a bad way. He's not the kind to get bored with a puppy and get rid of it.He'll put so much care into an animal, I don't think he could do such a thing.
"Jeewoo." I gave him a look.
"dogs aren't made for being alone for long hours and they need lots of exercises" he huffed.
"I know." I took out the noodles and set them down to cool.
"Then wh-" i cut him off.
"That's my plan. You quit the job, you can spend more time at home, studying and with the dog. You play basketball and i think the dog wouldn't mind running around with you" i smiled at my plan.
Jeewoo stood still staring at the noodles. I could hear the cogs in his brain spinning."Let me have a few days to think" he said taking down a bowl. "Let's Save some for dowoon to" i said taking a bowl.
"We made so much i think we will" jeewoo laughed sitting down. "Remember to study. If you study now you can get a good job in the future" i nodded knowledgeably.
"Aha wise guy" jeewoo said sarcastically.
I washed both bowls up and was speaking to jeewoo until my phone rang again.
"I think you should go" he laughed as he saw my frightened face as the caller id was yoongi.
"Yeah" i said.
"I'm gonna go pick up dowoon so ill go to" he dried the last spoon and ran to get his coat. I still needed to take some things over. I went to my old room. It was so strange. The walls bare, i remember where each poster had been. My David bowie poster on my wardrobe, the Beatles posters wall... Surprisingly no blue tack marks, something me and mum had been very surprised over. (And thankful) Most things had gone and it was empty mostly, but boxes still remained and shelves and my wardrobe remained full.
I took an empty box and started going around for things. I took rock collection, as i had forgotten them the last few times i had returned and was angry each time i had forgotten them.
I took my prized frog plushie down from a shelf and thew it into the box along with a few clothes. A box of photographs and my skateboard. All my items fitted snuggly in the box. I took the box and met jeewoo By the door standing proudly in his puffy coat.I took one look at him and snicked.
"You look like a drug dealer." He looked at me taken aback.
"Rude, this is the finest jacket i own" he snapped
"Hmm. Something a weirdos would say" i grinned
"now go" ushing him out the door. He looked at me with my box and said
"i hope the yellow submarine album is in there" Yellow Submarine, the worst Beatles album. I held back a gag.
"trip and fall" i shouted, sticking out my tongue.
"You look stupid" he yelled back walking in the opposite direction but waving. I smiled running down to the bus stop. My phone started ringing again so i dug around in my pocket balancing the box with one hand.
"Hello" i said tiredly into the phone.
"Where are you." A grumpy voice said. Ah yes the dulcet tones of min yoongi.
"Coming home" i said not wanting to say.
"I didn't ask that." He grumbled.
"Nice, where i was should be in the note" i said simply. Jeez. Why do they hardly ever read the notes? I shouldn't bother, i could send it on a pigeon and it probably has more chance of getting read.
"Whatever. Just get back here. I need to talk to you." He finished and put down the phone. I can tell you now.
I am terrified. Bloody fearing for my life i am...
The bus arrived and I jumped on scanning my card before quickly sitting down and whispering I silent payer, that this would be good.
Once again, time wasn't on my side. The bus travelled closer to the dorm i could feel my heart sinking. I took my box and started to make my way up to the dorms.I typed in the pin one-handed and let my self in. Empty, thank god. I smiled to myself. Placing down my box and lying on the sofa.
"Peace" I whispered.
"You" a voice said. The same voice as before. My eyes shot open.
i saw min yoongi hovering over me.
"Ahaha," i said simply. I sat up my back cracking loudly. I'm 19 not 49.Yoongi sat down beside me. Well, there was a massive gap between us but i ignored it that this seemed to be serious.
"Yeah so what do u want?" I tried not to sound rude. He simply leaned back and pulled something out from under the sofa. It was the folder i had put on his desk. Shit. What did i do wrong? Yoongi grumbled something along the lines of,
"they were good." My heart soared.
"what" I looked at him mortified, scanning his face for any other sign.
"Yeah yeah whatever." He grumbled before running off to his room.
"Brilliant" I smiled to my self. I took my box back to my room. I took out my prized frog and set him down on my bed. I had a look at my pictures to. They all had a special place in my heart.Going to the beach and looking for crabs or climbing a big hill.
Despite dowoon doing the peace sign strangely in every picture, jeewoo blinking in the odd few or me pulling a face, these pictures where perfect. My favourite was my dad reading to me in the back garden, flowers grew in corners and it was just perfect.
Pictures like these I put on the wall above my desk, so i could look at them whenever stressed. But not too many. I wanted to have the same shock and joy when I looked at the rest. I feel like a grandpa. I feel so old. Maybe I am 49.
Or I just grew up too quickly.I grabbed my bag to remove the remains of jins Mario, once again, the head was clean ripped off this made it easier for stitching back on. 30 minutes later the whole head was back on and i just needed to tighten the stitches by going back around. I really am a grandpa...
(a/n: i hate this website.)