Love You So Bad

By euphoria-vmin7

147K 4.6K 1.1K

(A BTS x Reader Fanfic) They say if you really want something, if you work hard enough, you'll get that and... More

The Beginning (a.k.a. me english speakeu)
Intro: 2 Cool 4 Skool/2 Cool 4 Another Member
Wishing On A Star (that they got no jams)
Good Day (actually the best day for (Name)!!)
Where Did You Come From? (Out of your life and into it)
Tomorrow (you have a meeting go to sleep!!)
No More Dream (Nightmares actually...)
Awake (Wakey Wakey White T-Shirt Time!!)
N.O (more english speakeu please...)
For You (..to do)
Let Me Know (...your thoughts??)
Attack on Bangtan's Golden Maknae
Danger : You're totally high
Look At Me
Rain (How does the weather know?!)
21st Century Girls...Aren't All Perfect
Intro: What Am I To You (I'm not uncomfortable...you can be yourself around me)
Begin (-ning of a nice relationship)
Perfect Man: Intro
Adult Child is Born Singer/Comedian
Jump (in fright)
Blood, Sweat, and No Tears, just Sunshine
Interlude: What Are You Doing
[BANGTAN BOMB] 613 BTS HOME PARTY Practice - Unit stage '삼줴이(3J)' - BTS (방탄소년단)
[BANGTAN BOMB] 613 BTS HOME PARTY Practice - Unit stage 'SIN' - BTS (방탄소년단)
BTS HOME PARTY FESTA 2017 Pt.1
BTS HOME PARTY FESTA 2017 Pt.2
BTS HOME PARTY FESTA 2017 Pt.3
Save Me...FROM THE LAVA!!!
Hold Me Tight + BTS Cypher Pt.3: Killer Hangover
Can You Turn Off Your Phone??...It's Time To Go!!
Aloha~Hawaii!
Aloha~Hawaii! Pt.2
Henna, Turtles, Keyrings Pt.1
Henna, Turtles, Keyrings Pt.2
Shouting Out BTS in the Center of Hawaii
First Helicopter Experience
Mission! Find the Lodging!
Waikiki's Night Is More Beautiful Than Your Day!
Twitter Update #1
Enjoy a Hula Dance
If You Believe, Count 1, 2, 3
Twitter Update #2
Not Today (of all days...)
Intro: Serendipity made ARMY hyenas
Twitter Update #3
DNA Pt.1
Twitter Update #4
DNA Pt.2
A Supplementary Story: You Never Walk Alone
Begin
First Love
Stigma
Flinch
Lie
Hooked Up
Twitter Update #5
MAMA
Best of Not Me...but BTS
Reflection
Christmas Day
- Young Forever -
A Typical 8th Member's Christmas
Awake
Kidz With Fun
Boyfriends are ILLEGAL
Young Forever
Crown for the Kings
BREAKING N... [Tap to load more]
Twitter Update #6
Outro: Does The Rumor Make Sense?
Attack on Bangtan's ACTUAL Maknae
Twitter Update #7
Twitter Update #8
Love Is Not Over
Promise
As I Told You
The Truth Untold
Agust D is very CONFUSED
Nothing Like Us
So Far Away
Beautiful
Daydream
Her
Heart Breaker
Friends
Singularity
Serendipity
Euphoria
Just Dance
Seesaw
Epiphany
We Are Bulletproof: The Eternal
Twitter Update #9
Love, Seokjin
Love, Yoongi
Love, Hoseok
Love, Namjoon
Love, Jimin
Love, Taehyung
Love, Jungkook
Love, Seven
Love, Bangtan
- The End -

Love

859 31 6
By euphoria-vmin7


Jungkook groaned in embarrassment as you burst into a fit of raucous giggles.

"Fuck you (Name),"

"Oh yes you'd want to, wouldn't you?" you teased and he glared at you irritably as he rubbed his bottom lip. There was a dull ache in the area where he had just hit himself with his microphone while singing Euphoria. But his pride hurt more because he had provided you with the perfect opportunity to bully him.

"Bitch," he grumbled.

"Jerk," you shot back.

"Thank god I don't have to hold this all the fucking time," he muttered.

"Yeah, we don't want to see you punch your own face again," you commented and once again the 97 liner glared at you. He then smirked at you and raised a brow.

"What's with you this morning? You're in an awfully good mood today,"

"Can't I be in a good mood, Kookoo?" you pouted condescendingly and he flipped you off moodily. You laughed and plopped down next to him as he took a swig of water to replenish his dry throat.

"I don't know. I just feel at ease for once. I'm excited to continue the tour and just-" you sighed deeply and looked to the sky. "I feel good,"

Jungkook grinned fondly and nudged you with his elbow. "That's great (Nickname). Really it is. It's nice to see you this way,"

You mirrored his grin, a sweet smile that had his cheeks flushing.

"Aw thanks, Kookoo," you latched onto his bicep in a jokingly clingy manner.

"Would you stop that?" he groaned and you pouted.

"Stop what?"

"Stop calling me Kookoo!!" he raised his voice at the end, swiping his hand down to smack your arm. You only let out a bark of laughter and stuck your tongue out.

"Nope! I like Kookoo,"

He threw his head back in defeat as another groan left his lips.

"Why are you groaning so much?" Hoseok called from the other end of the stage.

"(Name)'s being a bitch again," he complained and the elder chuckled.

"What's new?"

Jungkook sniggered as your jaw dropped.

"Hey! That was mean! And to think you were my favorite,"

"I thought Namjoon was your favorite?" Jungkook raised a brow.

"Namjoon is my first love. But Hoseok hits different, you know?"

Said male only laughed before turning away to watch his practice video of Just Dance.

"(Name), can you come here for a second? I just wanna make a minor change to your choreo," Sung Deuk called from backstage and you stood up quickly.

"Yes~" you answered before looking down at your panting best friend. "Keep practicing, Kookie. I'll be right back,"

He grinned and nodded, taking another swig of water as he watched you go. His eyes then began to roam to the other members. He glanced at Hoseok who was hard at work perfecting his routine even past perfection. Jimin had taken one corner of the stage, sweat dripping down his forehead as he practiced Serendipity for the fifth time that morning. Both Taehyung and Seokjin were in the audience, with the elder holding his phone to record the practice, knowing fully well that Jimin would nitpick his own steps afterward. Yoongi was at the other end of the stage, muttering raps under his breath as one of the staff massaged his shoulders. Then Jungkook glanced at you, watching with adoring eyes as you copied the movements of your teacher with the utmost attention. He explained a quick step to you, before demonstrating and watching you mimic, grinning as you understood it. Jungkook didn't even realize he was grinning too. If there was one thing he had to say he loved the most about you, it was the determination. He loved that you had the same passionate fire in your eyes that he did. Though you weren't nearly perfect and he knew that. You had flaws, in fact, LOTS of flaws. Some of which he would never get over. You were too stubborn, too prideful, and too over conscious, traits that especially pissed him off to no end. There were things about you that he could never vibe with because they clashed with his personality in explosive ways. But, he could look past them to instead focus on all the things he practically adored about you.

He chuckled to himself, shaking his head. It seemed like only yesterday when just seeing your face pissed him off. It seemed like only yesterday when he had just extended the hand of his friendship and felt like a shy schoolboy when you readily accepted it. And now, when he took a step back to look at the two of you, he felt so good about how far he'd come with you.

He glanced to look at the leader, who had just finished Love. He was panting a bit, but remained unbothered as his stylist came to dab at the sweat collecting at his forehead. Jungkook frowned a bit in concern at the elder's expression. Namjoon hadn't seemed like himself lately. He was much quieter and often zoned out in the midst of conversations. Jungkook briefly wondered if he was okay or if he was going through something. He wanted to be there for his hyung, just as the leader had been so many times for Jungkook himself.

He considered going up to Namjoon to ask him, but it seemed that it wouldn't be necessary. The leader made eye contact with the maknae and offered him a small smile. Jungkook gave him a cute bunny smile that put Namjoon's expression at a bit more ease. He approached the youngest, wiping at his forehead gingerly before taking a seat next to him.

"Hey," Jungkook greeted.

"Hey," he answered. "What are you up to?"

"Oh, I was just practicing Euphoria and I had (Name) watching me but she had to go change something in her choreo so I just took a break,"

Namjoon's eyes drifted towards you and a soft smile graced his lips. He watched you, the same way Jungkook had, and felt his pride swell at how determined you looked.

"She's a great dancer," he commented and Jungkook nodded in agreement, letting his eyes rest on you once again.

"Yeah, she is," he sighed. "Even though she's been annoying me all morning when I was trying to practice my shit. You'd think that she would wanna do something more useful. Maybe to practice her own crap or something? But nah, she's been bothering me and calling me Kookoo since-"

Jungkook paused his rambling as he realized that Namjoon was no longer listening. He had zoned out just as he had been doing all these weeks. Jungkook traced his line of sight to see that the leader's eyes were set on a panting Jimin. He watched the dancer strike the final pose before grinning at Taehyung's loud cheering. Namjoon continued to observe the younger male climb down from the stage to take a peek at the video on Seokjin's phone.

Jungkook frowned in confusion and a bit of concern.

"Namjoonie hyung?"

The elder jumped a bit, head darting around to look at the maknae.

"What?!"

"Are..." Jungkook paused, frowning worriedly. "Are you okay, hyung?"

"Yeah," he chuckled with a confused shake of his head. "I'm fine,"

Jungkook had known Namjoon for just short of a decade. He had been with him through hardships and joys. He knew better than to believe that.

But he also didn't want to be nosy. Living with his hyungs had taught him that sometimes, they liked to be left alone, and to deal with their own issues by themselves. Perhaps this was one of those times.

"Are you sure?" he asked, unknowingly giving the elder the cutest pair of puppy dog eyes the world has ever seen. Namjoon grinned and patted his shoulder.

"Yes Kook-ah," he chuckled. "I'm okay. I've just been a bit...distracted,"

As he said this, Namjoon's eyes drifted to Jimin once again and Jungkook wondered whether the two of them had fought or something. It was weird to suggest though, considering that the two of them almost never had disagreements.

"Oh...okay," Jungkook acquiesced, not feeling like pushing his hyung into talking if he didn't feel like it. "Let me know if you need me for anything,"

He offered the elder male a small smile, patting him on the shoulder before standing up and taking his spot on stage to run through Euphoria once again. Perhaps he'd ask you, Jimin, Taehyung, and Jin to practice The Truth Untold with him afterward.

Namjoon continued to stare at Jimin with an undefinable look in his eye. He gnawed at his plump bottom lip worriedly and Jungkook tried to push away his concern to focus on his solo.

"Neoneun nae salme dasi tteun haetbit

Eorin sijeol nae kkumdeurui jaerim."

Jungkook glanced at Namjoon once again, his focus drifting.

"Moreugesseoi gamjeongi mwonji

Hoksi yeogido kkumsok ingeonji."

The elder male had pulled out his phone after he tore his eyes away from Jimin.

"Kkumeun samagui pureun singiru

Nae an gipeun gosui a priori."

He scrolled mindlessly, though the maknae knew that his attention was not on the device in his hands.

"Sumi makil deusi haengbokaejyeo

Jubyeoni jeomjeom deo tumyeong haejye."

Namjoon was bouncing his leg anxiously. Jungkook frowned. Namjoon hated when others did that, finding it distracting. So what was making him so jittery as to resort to it himself?

"Jeogi meolliseo badaga deullyeo

Kkumeul geonneoseo supul neomeoro."

Jungkook watched with his keen eyes as Namjoon glanced up. This time, however, his eyes went to you and remained there.

"Seonmyeong haejineun geugoseuroga~"

Namjoon's eyes then moved back and forth between you and Jimin and Jungkook felt a sense of dread wash over him. Dread and absolute uncertainty.

"Take my hands now."

Namjoon looked different. The expression on his face was so...conflicted. The worry in Jungkook's gut raised tenfold.

"You are the cause of my euphoria........"

He couldn't take it anymore.

"Jungkook-ah," the leader called out and Jungkook gulped at how drained it sounded. "Can you come with me for a second?"

Jungkook quickly shut off the music and flipped the switch to his mic. He handed it to one of the passing staff and followed Namjoon down the stairs at the side of the stage, the leader's longer legs giving him a barely noticeable advantage.

Namjoon climbed up into the rows of seats, taking a random one he found with a clear view of the stage. Jungkook plopped down next to him. He could see Jimin once again starting Serendipity and could just barely make out Seokjin's complaints regarding the pain in his arms from videotaping all the time.

"Are you okay, hyung?" Jungkook asked once again, letting Namjoon know that he had noticed the difference in his behavior.

"No, Kook-ah," he sighed, leaning back in the seat. "I have so much on my mind,"

"Does it have anything to do with new songs or lyrics? Because I can try to help you. I know I'm not great but..." Jungkook trailed off helplessly but Namjoon was shaking his head with a fond smile.

"It's not that, though I appreciate the thought, Kookie. And you've been getting really good at making music, so don't put yourself down," Jungkook smiled gratefully, before turning to look at the taller man fully.

"If it's not that, then what's bothering you?"

Nammjoon was silent for a moment, his breath stilling. "I think I made a mistake,"

Jungkook frowned. "What?"

"I did something wrong,"

There was a pause in the conversation as Jungkook tried to think about what Namjoon could be talking about.

"I did something I promised myself I wouldn't do and I hate myself for it,"

Jungkook bit his lip in concern. The last time he had heard Namjoon like this....

"Hyung," he asked in a small voice that was somehow filled with so much comfort. "I'm sure it's not something horrible,"

"I promised myself I wouldn't," the light-haired male sighed, fiddling with his fingers.

"Hyung, what is it?"

Namjoon was quiet. "You can't tell anyone, Kookie,"

"Of course not," Jungkook agreed readily. The members rarely kept secrets from each other. So when Namjoon said it like that, Jungkook knew it had to be something serious and personal.

"You always talk about how you look up to me. How you admire me,'' Namjoon smiled as Jungkook whined, shoving his shoulder.

"But I don't think you know how much I admire and respect you,"

Jungkook could tell by his tone that this wasn't meant to be one of those cringy moments where they all talked about how much they loved each other. This was serious. Different.

"And of course I trust the other members. But...." he sighed. "....I think I can't tell anyone else this. I want you to know, Jungkook,"

There was another unspoken declaration in that last sentence.

I trust you.

"Of course, hyung," Jungkook nodded. "You can always tell me,"

Namjoon sighed again, looking out into the distance to where you were eagerly showing Hoseok the changes in your choreography.

"(Name)," he said. Jungkook furrowed his brow in confusion.

"What about her? Did you two fight?"

He tried to sort through his brain and recall whether the two of you had been hostile towards each other in the last few weeks. From what he could remember, neither of you were.

"No," Namjoon chuckled. "We didn't fight,"

"Then?"

"I've been thinking about how much she means to me," the leader sighed. "How much I admire her, how happy she makes me, how well she fits with us. How I think she's like a little sister to me,"

An unknown weight dropped from Jungkook's shoulders. Shameful relief flooded his system, and he cursed himself for exactly what reason that relief had appeared.

"Yeah," Jungkook chuckled. "She's great,"

"She makes me happy," he repeated. "She's hardworking and I admire her. And ever since we've gotten to know her, I've felt like she was the sister I never had,"

"I get that," Jungkook grinned. "So then what's the problem, hyung?"

Jungkook's grin dropped as Namjoon turned to look at him. His expression was new, a mixture of somber, guilt, and shame mixed in all together. A bit of embarrassment dusted his cheeks in the form of a hidden blush.

"The problem is that I don't feel the same about her anymore. I don't think of her like I did before. It's different now. It's not just that I care about her because she's a member. It's love now. I'm in love with her,"

.

.

.

.



[UNEDITED]

ITS PAST 1 AM HERE AND IM SO FUCKING TIRED

SO TODAY'S NOTE IS PROBABLY GONNA BE SHORT

TO EVERYONE WONDERING, I REACHED OUT TO THE PERSON WHO HAD SIMILARITIES IN THEIR STORY AND THEY SAID THEY'D CHANGE STUFF BUT THEN DELETED THEIR PROFILE SO IDK MAN??

UGH IM NOT EVEN SURE WHAT HAPPENED IN THE LAST FEW WEEKS BUT I HOPE EVERYONE'S BEEN DOING OKAY

HAPPY 7 YEARS OF BANGTAN AND HERE'S TO MANY MORE :)

IM SO EXCITED TO FINISH THIS BOOK AND MOVE ONTO MY OTHER IDEAS

I HAVE SO MANY IN MY HEAD AND SKKSSK IM eXCITED

SOMEONE HELP ME GET INTO TWICE CUZ I WANNA STAN THEM

QUEENS

ANYWAYS

NOW THAT SCHOOL'S DONE I FEEL,,,,WEIRD

BUT

IVE DONE MORE ART

MORE COLLEGE SEARCHING

MORE STUDYING :(

BUT IVE ALSO BEEN TAKING SOME TIME FOR MYSELF

I GOT INTO TRANSITION EDITS NOW,,,,WHICH ARE SUPER HARD BUT IF I WANNA BE FAMOUS ON INSTAGRAM I GOTTA STRUGGLE LMAO >:)

I STARTED BAKING AND COOKING AT HOME

AND OVERALL JUST WRITING A LOT MORE AND GETTING MY TUMBLR ACCOUNT GOING

IM SO EXCITED FOR ALL THE FIC IDEAS I HAVE

ANYWAYS STREAM STAY GOLD (A TRUE MASTERPIECE)

ALL OF YOU STAY SAFE AND SPREAD AS MUCH AWARENESS ABOUT WHAT'S GOING ON AS YOU CAN

I LOVE YOU ALL

IM GOING TO BED NOW

BYEEEEEEEEEEE :)

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