The Fourth of July is shamefully one of my favorite days of the year. In college I advocated for my family to celebrate the anti-fourth, that way we could still spend a day on the boat, have parties, but not celebrate a country that steals land and systematically oppresses people. My mom didn't like that very much. She told me that if I was going to speak like that I could either move or keep myself inside for the day. My will power failed me and Jell-O shots and wakeboarding won out.
To this day I refuse to wear red, white and blue, more out of stubbornness towards my parents, but I still look forward to the holiday at the lake. When we were younger all of the kids would hop from house to house or swim in the lake while the adults drank on someone's patio. Once the day faded into night, the dads would set off fireworks at the end of the dock six houses down from ours. It was a day of fun where our parents cared significantly less about what we did.
We set out for the lake right after breakfast, eager to make the most of the day. Once we get far enough out on the water I head to the cooler and grab beers to hand out to everyone except for Harper and Lucia. "Can I have one?" Harper asks innocently. Everyone laughs at her naivety, and she looks around confused, her cheeks turning pink.
"Sorry kid," I tell her, "I'm afraid you have a few more years left in the juice box club." I pull out a Capri-sun just for her despite the disapproving look from Kelly. She's on the whole no sugar thing and is super strict about what the kids are allowed to eat, but she can't take it away now.
"Lily, do you really need to start drinking this early? Alcohol and water sports don't mix," my dad asks, setting his unopened beer back in the cooler.
"Water sports and alcohol mix very well. Don't be lame," I tell him, opening my can and taking a long drink, "Jared agrees." I point towards Jared who is taking a long swig of his own. Once he notices that we're talking about him he pulls the drink from his lips, wiping his chin.
"Who's going out first?" he asks, getting up and grabbing life jackets from a compartment under the bench. Lucia is out for obvious reasons, Kelly doesn't do dirty water, and Scott isn't much of an athlete, so I decide to put Harry on the spot.
"Harry will go," I volunteer. Harry's eyes shoot up in surprise.
"No, Harry will not," he responds, giving me the 'what are you doing' look.
"Oh come on! You can't be that bad," I grab his hands and try to pull him up, but he's dead weight, absolutely refusing.
"Lilian Jean, don't force the poor boy," my mom defends him. Jared tosses me a lifejacket instead, "I guess that means you're up."
Shoving my feet into the boots is harder than I remember, and I begin to panic that I'll be too out of practice. After all, I have a reputation to uphold and a boy to impress. Once my feet are strapped and my grip is good on the handle, I shoot my dad a thumbs up and the boat begins to pull me forward. Once I pull myself up, muscle memory takes over and I allow my legs to feel strong underneath me as the waves cut under me.
There's something freeing and rewarding about tagging along to the back of a boat. It's like my journey to relinquishing control. Like life, the moment that the boat starts to move your body fills with an excited nervousness. The thought of it is slightly daunting, no matter how ready you said you were. But once you get your balance it's pure adrenaline and excitement. And when you wipe out, you try again. That redemption is a reminder of how capable your body and your mind is. That's your reward.
I get some good runs in before I slip my feet out and swim up to the boat. Harry grabs my hand to help pull me up while Jared jumps in to take his turn. I wrap myself up in a towel and scoot close to Harry trying to warm up.
"I'm impressed," he tells me before lowering his voice so only I can hear, "that was kinda hot." I feel myself blush in response, pulling my towel tighter in hopes of my family not noticing.
We eventually get Harry out on the water, and even Scott takes a run too before lunch. "There's only one acceptable thing to each for lunch on a boat," I tell Harry, tossing a sandwich at him, "peanut butter and jelly and Cool Ranch Doritos. That's it."
He inspects his sandwich before looking back up at me, "what about the cheese Doritos?"
"Bring those up again and you can swim back," I reprimand. Harry just goes back to inspecting his food, eating the Cool Ranch Doritos dutifully. The meal reminds me of my childhood like most other things on this trip. There's something about it that hits the spot.
It's still early in the afternoon but the combination of spending time in the sun and eating has me exhausted. I lay out on the front of the boat, the sun as my blanket, and close my eyes. I've taken more naps like this than I can count and every time they just hit differently. Everyone else is either floating on noodles in the lake or laying out so I don't feel guilty abandoning the group.
It's a light sleep, and I'm not sure how long I've been out for when I'm awoken by a strong grip on my ankles. My eyes shoot open when I feel another set of hands grab my wrists. I immediately notice the cross tattoo on the hand before I look up to see Harry towering over me.
"You wouldn't," I grumble at Harry. His face splits into a devilish grin and that's answer enough.
"Oh, but it was his idea," Jared says from the other end where my feet lay. They begin lifting me off the bench and I try to make myself dead weight, but both of them are far stronger than me. With one swing, I'm flying through the air, landing in the water straight on my back.
"I'm going to kill you!" I shout from the water, my back still stinging. Jared is a seasoned pro, and immediately ran away, but Harry stands at the edge of the boat laughing at me. He should know that I'm one to go for revenge. I use every bit of upper body strength that I have to pull myself up so that my head is level with the lip of the boat and make a reach for Harry's ankles. He begins losing his balance, so I use my feet to push myself off the side of the boat. All hope is lost for him as he plunges into the water with me.
*****
While my dad grills dinner the neighbors come and go, catching up with my parents over a beer. Harper runs off with Mrs. O'Callaghan's granddaughter just like when I did with Mrs. O'Callaghan's daughter when I was younger. It all feels very full circle. Everyone who comes by introduces themselves to Harry and tells some embarrassing story about me. Breaking a window throwing the football, Jared pulling my pants down in front of my elementary school crush, the usual. Harry absorbs every word, clearly amused by all of it.
The only interaction that I didn't love was the oldest Johnson girl. She's in middle school now, and when she saw Harry she began scream crying. Then, instead of calming her down, her mom shoved paper in Harry's face for him to sign quite rudely. He took it in stride, not showing his irritation. I had no problem showing mine though.
"Mrs. Johnson we're really just trying to enjoy our vacation right now, would you mind taking her somewhere else?" I point to her daughter who continues to hyperventilate, "it also wouldn't hurt you to ask for an autograph instead of shoving stuff in his face."
"Lilian it's not a big deal. Is it, Harry?" she acknowledges, scolding me, "She's always been a sassy one. Quite disrespectful if you ask me," Mrs. Johnson rolls her eyes. Me? I'm the disrespectful one? Eventually my mom came and distracted her, guiding her away once they got their autograph. I couldn't stand the woman as a kid and I can't stand her now.
"I'm sorry about that," I apologize to Harry once they're out of earshot.
"It's just part of the job. Not your fault," he shrugs, like it's no big deal. But it is a big deal. This was supposed to be a break from all of this.
"I have an idea," I grab Harry's hands and pull him up to standing. I take my large tshirt off so I'm just wearing my swimsuit. I hop onto the boat that's anchored at the end up the dock and have Harry help me take down the tube from the rack on the top, tossing it into the water. I leap onto it, and Harry follows after me. We lay side by side, floating on top of the water.
"Now we'll have the best view of the fireworks and nobody can bother us," it's the most alone we've felt since my family got here. Even in the comfort of our room there are people on either side of us. But with the sound of music, people chatting, and kids shouting, nobody can hear us. Nobody is even paying us any mind.
"If you were randomly arrested, what do you think people would assume you did?" he asks, staring off to where a group of dads gather on the dock setting up the fireworks. Like always, I laugh at the question before I think long and hard.
"Well my family would probably think destruction of property or doing something stupid while drunk, something that I would've gotten in trouble for when I was younger. Mrs. O'Callaghan would definitely put her money on arson or murder. I think my college friends would think it would be at a protest, and the media would say tax evasion," so many people see different versions of me, that I think they would all say something different, "what do you think I would be arrested for?"
"Theft," Harry answers simply.
"Theft? I've never stolen anything in my life," I argue. I've never stooped that low, and now I have money. I can buy things, I don't need to steal them.
"You've stolen my heart," he says cheesily. I push him in response, causing the entire raft to rock underneath us.
"That's the most disgusting thing I've heard. Stop it," I hate cheesy stuff, and he knows it. I'm pretty sure that's why he does it. It's like he enjoys watching me cringe. He laughs at my reaction, glad he got the rise.
"Lil, why do you hate when people say nice things to you?" he asks. It's true, I don't take compliments well. He does raise an interesting question though. Why don't I like it?
"I have no idea... I think it's a self esteem thing? When I was younger especially my self esteem was pretty low, so compliments seemed fake. It contradicted everything I believed to be true. And I'd say my confidence improved as I got older, but I never quite grew out of that."
Harry gives my hand a squeeze and it's the perfect response. Sometimes words are meaningless. It's like what I was telling Celeste weeks ago about becoming famous. Just because someone tells you you're pretty doesn't instantly make you feel like the words are true. But that squeeze is reassurance, it's understanding, and that's all I can ask for.
The fireworks begin overhead, and as I predicted, we have the best seat in the house. We watch the display from our little island in the lake just us two. Of every Fourth, I think this one is my favorite.
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A/N: Hey guys! Thanks again for being so amazing, I LOVE that you guys love this story! Make sure you give me a follow if you want updates from me about new chapters :)
This story is still far from over and pretty soon I'm going to rock your world ... hehe