Ivys PoV
"Ivy, Ivy baby. Wake up." I herd Mikey mumble softly.
I fluttered my eyes open and looked around finding Michael and Luke.
"Huh? What?" I asked tiredly, yawning.
"We're at the bus, come on." Luke said getting out of the car.
I sighed and picked my bag up, slowly climbing out of the car.
"I didn't even know you were asleep." Mikey chuckled.
"Y-yeah. Neither did I." I said still feeling shaken up from the events that happened a few hours ago.
"You-you know he didn't mean anything, right?" Calum whispered as Ashton walked onto the bus.
I'm shrugged.
"If he was a parent figure, he wouldn't have an absolute fit every fucking day. He wouldn't make me have attacks." I said loud enough for Ashton to hear me.
Ashton turned around as fast as possible. He looked like he was going to say something but he didn't.
"Ivy, stop being harsh. Ash, he's going through a lot." Luke said as we walked onto the bus.
"Well aren't we all Luke!" I snapped back.
"Ivy! Don't snap back like that!" Calum exclaimed.
"Whatever." I snarled.
"What has gotten into you?!" Luke barked.
I rolled my eyes and barged through them to get to my bunk. I felt a little tug on my arm and I turned to see Michael.
"Come with me," he whispered calmly.
I didn't want to but I knew I could trust Michael more than anyone else.
I meekly nodded making him smile slightly. He took my hand and lead me to a small room in the back of the bus.
We sat down on the small couch.
I felt afraid. Like they were going to send me back or something worse. After all the pain and shit I've caused them, I deserve it.
"A-are you... do you- do you hate me?" I asked barely above a whisper.
"What?! Of corse not ivy! Why would you think that?" He asked sounding shocked.
"I-I've just ruined everything. I didn't mean to, I promise! I-"
"Hey, baby girl. It's ok. You're going to be ok. I'm here for you. Just tell me why you acted like you did back there." He spoke almost sickly sweet.
"You-you'll think I'm a monster." I murmured.
"Ivy, I'm not ok? You're going to tell me." He said holding my hand in his.
"I-I don't deserve this. I don't deserve you. I don't deserve to have Ashton. Or Luke, or Calum. I-I let you guys down. I need to act up so-so he'll send me back. I-it hurts knowing people like max and Lottie still need a home but-but I'm in a home instead of them. I-I can't control it." I muttered as a tear rolled down my cheek.
All Mikey did was pull me into a hug. I started sobbing uncontrollably into his chest.
"I know it's a lot baby, I know you didn't mean anything. Just let it all out." He said rubbing circles on my back.
"I-I promise, I didn't mean I-it." I sobbed into his chest.
"Hey, I know ok? How bout we stay here for a while and chill out ok? We can watch films or You can tell me anything like funny or embarrassing stories or anything to make you feel better, deal?"
I nodded into his chest feeling him lift me up,
"I'll get our bags and some blankets and we can watch something." He said trying to make me feel better.
"S-sure." I murmured.
He left the room giving me a small smile as I sunk into the corner of the couch.
I started to hit my head repeatedly with the ball of my hand as I tried to vent out my anger ( This is something I do when I'm stressed or angry and I can't control it so please don't judge.)
I felt my stress melt away and I sunk back into the couch feeling my heart slow down a bit. I looked out the window and slightly jolted as I saw Calum and Ashton outside. They started walking back in and I saw Ashton glair at me as If I'd done something wrong. I turned my head back as Mikey opened the door.
"I've got your bag and mine and some food and blankets, and I think Luke's joining us to leave ash and cal to uhh,-"
"Mikey I get it. So they can do the dirty elsewhere." I said as Luke walked into the room.
"Yeah, that." Mikey said, blush coming through his cheeks.
Luke closed the door and Mikey put our stuff on the ground. I herd ash And cal come back into the bus.
"Hey, ivs are you ok?" Luke asked sitting next to me.
Out of instinct, I moved away from Luke.
How can I trust him? He's obviously on Ashtons side.
Luke frowned a bit and looked at the ground and Michael sighed.
"Ivy, Luke isn't going to hurt you." Mikey exhaled.
"How do I know that?" I mumbled, curling into a ball.
"Because Ivy, I want to help you. I don't want to hurt you. I want you to be happy, ok?" Luke admitted.
I sighed and looked at Luke. I saw his facade, he was smiling but he was hurting inside.
"I'm sorry, i-I don't know what came over me. I trust you." I answered, he shuffled closer to me and I snuggled into him.
He wrapped his arms around me, holding me tightly.
Michael sat next to me and turned the tv on flicking through other channels. I felt my eyes fall heavy as Luke soothed circles in my back.
"Get some rest babe." Luke whispered.
-
-
-
"Ash, you know we can't do that. It would absolutely break them." I herd Luke mutter.
I stayed still and kept my eyes closed as I laid on Luke and the couch.
"They can't keep dating, could you imagine how much Legal shit we could be in?"
"Ashton, we know but I'm in love with her. If you don't like it then we can keep it private." I herd Mikey say, his voice laced in sadness.
"You realise she's my daughter, right?!"
"Baby calm down." Calum mumbled
"You'll wake her."
I felt my heart sink but not in a sad way. I felt like my love for Mikey has fizzled away a bit and hearing how hurt he is makes me feel guilty.
"Look, Michael you cant date her ok? I'm sorry but she's 14. It isn't legal." Ashton said more calmly.
After a long winded silence, Luke soon spoke up.
"Look, can we drop this? Just- i know how hard it is for both of you guys but we need to just take a chill pill and step away from this topic-"
"Fine, I won't show affection to her. If that makes you happy." Michael said, sounding drained and empty.
Was he being real?
"Well then, it's sorted." Ashton grunted.
"But shouldn't she have a say in this too?" Calum whispered.
"She's all lovestruck by Mikey, she's obsessed with him. She's not going to get a say cause she's not gonna want to."
"No Ash. I want to."
The room fell silent as i opened my eyes. I looked at Mikey finding tears running down his face.
"I-ivy you know you can't date him. I-"
"Ashton. If you cared you would at least let me see him. I get it not in public, but it's only considered illegal if we do anything sexual. Just please." I said feeling the tears fill my eyes and a limp form in my throat.
I didn't have the same love for Mikey as he did for me, but I want him to be happy. I'd give up everything for him.
"But did you hear what Mikey said?" Calum asked
"Yes and did you hear how empty he sounded when he said that? Have you even seen him?" I asked more harshly than I intended.
They all looked over at Mikey, seeing the tears on his face.
"I'm not saying that you can't see e-"
"Yes you are!" Michael barked, looking sad and angry at the same time.
"If this is how your gonna be, you won't ever date! Ever! Or even see her! Ash screamed.
The room fell completely silent. Tears slipped out of my eyes.
"Mate, that's a bit extreme." Luke said, breaking the silence
I shoved Luke's arm off of me and ran out of the back room.
"IVY!!" Calum shouted after me.
I ignored him and jumped into my bunk, the tears falling rapidly down my face.
I curled into a ball and hid under my duvet.
I know they hate me, what's the point of living anymore?