*Chapter 15*
Rea did random activities around the bedroom. He cleaned the main light near the vent. It wasn't dirty. He pressed buttons on his computer. Nothing happened. He wiped off his spotless counter and swept his clean floor.
It seemed like he couldn't sit down. Maybe he thought if he sat, he would have to talk to her. If Karma pushed him about their relationship, all she would accomplish would be him closing down.
In the last few hours, he hadn't spoken once. After she'd told him about Fletcher and The Seemyah, she expected more questions, but he didn't even look at her. He hadn't commented on anything or asked her anything more. At the very least, Karma assumed he would say something about the fact that she had practically begged to stay with him, but no.
Karma rested, sat, waited. The quiet of the room enveloped them. He acted as if she wasn't worth bothering with, but Karma knew better. At some point, he would have to talk to her. He just needed to stop being so stubborn.
She angled back against the soft pillows as Rea cleaned his counter and table a second time. There was clearly nothing on the top. She spread out the blanket and arranged it over her body so her nipples were slightly showing. When she did that, it was the only time she caught his eye. As she folded the cover, it dawned on her that the blanket was a different one with a busy pink flower pattern. It didn't look like a blanket he would've chosen for his bed. She petted the new quilt. Maybe he was finally decorating and settling into this water base. She couldn't picture him decorating with pink flowers, but maybe he liked pink.
She imagined staying here with him. The thought was a welcoming balm on torn flesh.
"This is nice. When did you get a new blanket? It's softer than your old one." She spoke loudly enough so he could hear her, but he turned his back to the bed. Karma hoped her comment would get his attention, but she wished she could've come up with a better opening line to break the ice. She was starting to wonder if he was ever going to talk to her again.
Rea looked up from the counter and peered over his shoulder. His eyes dropped to her nipples and then came back up to her face. He looked irritated, and she got some pleasure from taunting him. It was good to know he couldn't ignore her forever.
"I had to get a new quilt 'coz you were so gross when you got here that I had to throw my other one in the incinerator."
Karma laughed but then realized he wasn't joking. He didn't even crack a smile.
"I fell into the ocean when Fletcher shot me. It was rank. He was expecting me. I should've known better, but I'm a little rusty since I got out of The Seemyah." Karma knew she owed Rea more than she could ever repay. If he hadn't helped her, she wouldn't be alive. She sobered and met Rea's unflinching green eyes.
"You fell into the ocean?" His eyes flipped back and forth over her. A deep "v" appeared between his eyebrows. That look gave Karma hope. It meant he must care for her. It was a good sign. "That explains a lot." He ran his hands back and forth through his red hair. As he did, his red locks stuck up like red flames dancing. "You could've died."
He didn't want her dead. Another good sign.
Karma didn't know what more to say. She wanted more than anything to assure him that her death wasn't her concern. Losing him was her only real fear. She needed to convince him she would stay here if he asked, but really, she didn't know how to prove to him she was a changed person. Even with the power to know when people were lying, Rea seemed like he didn't trust his ability.
When they were younger, he never fully trusted his instincts, and now it was obvious that nothing about that had changed. Karma didn't think Rea would believe her if she told him she loved him. Maybe who she had become was so far away from the girl he knew that he couldn't care for her. He might not be able to think about her in the same way again. All Karma was really asking for was for Rea to let her stay and for them to get to know each other once again. She was sure that if they spent honest time together, they would be happy. She was attracted to Rea, and she knew he liked her. If only they could learn to trust and make peace with their past.
"I don't think it's a good idea for you to stay, Karma. I don't know who you are now. We're both different people."
Rea's words killed her inside, but she didn't let the hurt show on her face.
"Right now, Fletcher is coming for you, and I can help you when he shows up. I don't want you hurt or killed. Fletcher made it clear you were still his hit, and if I got in his way, he wouldn't have any problem killing me as well. He shot me when I told him I wasn't accepting the job. I'm as marked as you are now. I'm not leaving until Fletcher is dead. I have a right to kill him for the simple fact he killed Tad. I may not have liked Tad much, but he was my stepbrother. I'll have the best chance of catching him here. Besides, I still have a little responsibility to the members of The Seemyah, and I'm sure he's doing this job without their approval."
"So, this is about you being loyal to The Seemyah and your brother. Not about me."
"Stepbrother," she corrected and then continued. "No, it's about my loyalty to you. Didn't you hear me? I don't want you hurt or killed. I'm loyal to you now, not them. You have my word." Karma gave him a sincere look to show him she meant what she said, but he looked unmoved. Rea offered her no encouragement.
She didn't know what to say now.
"Karma, you can't stay here. I can't trust you. You shot me." Rea came over to stand next to the bed, and he stared down at her. His look was frosty. Karma wished she could have him the way he was before she told him about her past.
"And you punched me in the face and sprayed a whole roomful of bullets trying to kill me. I think we're even."
"I knew that would come back to bite me in the ass." Rea put his hands on his hips. "You became an assassin."
He wasn't relenting. Frustration rose within her.
Karma glowered at him. "You became a doormat for your father to wipe his boots on."
Rea's next look was so glacial Karma thought he could've started another ice era in his bedroom.
She shivered and came up with a new plan. She didn't want to fight with him. She only wanted him to understand they were more than their pasts. She was more than hers.
"All I'm asking for is time. Another week. I promise to tell you only the truth while I'm here, and I promise to watch your back until Fletcher shows up. Can't you give me a chance? You'll know if I'm lying."
Rea's shoulders dropped slightly. He was giving in. She wanted to do a victory dance.
"If I say no?" Rea cast a sideways glance.
"If you say no... I'll hide on the base, and you'll spend half the time wondering where I am or if it's someone trying to kill you. All I'm asking for is some time, Rea. Please."
Karma knew she was begging, but she couldn't help it. Rea didn't understand what was at stake here. She wished he could see this was more than merely killing Fletcher and keeping him safe. It was also about them as a couple. Throwing away everything they once had would be a waste. Throwing away a real future was a waste, too, especially when life was short and Karma was sure they could find true happiness with each other.
The idea of real happiness filled her with hope. Hope for their mutual future, a future that was once taken from them. Karma had hoped she could become someone better. Together she and Rea could build a new life.
"You can stay for one week." Rea's face was a flat mask.
Karma couldn't help but let a huge smile spread across her face. She didn't even care he glared at her.
"You can stay, but I have some conditions."
"I figured you would. Go."
"First, you stay within my sight at all times."
"Done." She nodded happily. Her smile was so large her cheeks hurt.
"I'm not finished yet." His face looked like it could've been made out of cement, but Karma didn't care about his dour expression. She was staying, and she had never been more excited about something so simple.
"You stay with me at all times, and no lies about anything. As soon as Fletcher is taken care of, you leave if I say so. This is my base. The safety of everyone here is important."
Karma's heart dropped when he mentioned her leaving, but at the same time, she was joyful she would have some time with him, however short it might be. Now, she had mixed emotions about Fletcher showing up. On one hand, it would be good to have the bastard dead, but if it took him a while to make his move, then Karma would have a longer time with Rea.
"You agree to my terms?" Rea crossed his arms over his chest.
"Absolutely, but I want to be armed."
Karma thought he looked like he might strangle her. That wasn't a good sign, but she couldn't help him without a weapon.
"No."
That one word booked no argument, but Karma wasn't deterred. His no-nonsense expressions never fazed her.
"I can't protect you without a gun, and I'm taking baby steps in leaving my former life. You can't keep me unarmed. That's nonsense. I'm a better shot than most of your men. Your guards are novices and kind of lazy. I need some type of weapon. I'm here to help you."
"I can keep you unarmed all I want. People stay unarmed all the time, and they live happy lives. If I wanted to, I could keep you naked and tied to my bed."
"Kinky." Karma saw the slightest smile pick up one side of his mouth, and then just as suddenly as it had appeared, he pushed the grin away. He went back to being solemn.
"None of that either. You can stay only 'coz I have someone trying to kill me. That's all. There is no 'we.' Got it?"
Karma let the blanket drop lower.
"Perhaps you'll change your mind." She shoved the blanket the rest of the way off. He would change his mind, she was sure.
"You're stubborn. I forgot how you never take no for an answer."
Karma laughed and didn't answer. For now, she was just going to be pleased with her small victory. Gingerly, she moved her legs until they were poised over the floor. Her hands spread wide on either side of her body for balance. If she had to stay unarmed for Rea to trust her, she could do that, at least for a while. She had to force her legs to hold her up, and she wobbled. It appeared the conversation was over for now.
"What're you doing?" Rea crossed to stand directly in front of her. He looked at her as if he'd never seen her before.
"I have to use the bathroom." Karma struggled to steady herself on her feet. She held on to the bed as she tried to get her bearings. She wasn't sure how long she stood there before Rea wrapped his arms around her waist. She waited for him to help her to the bathroom or toss her back into bed, but he did neither of those things. Rea pulled her close and held her to him like he missed her. As they stood there, his eyes gazed at her naked body. Her skin heated where his eyes traveled.
His eyes spoke of anger and concern, but it was clear by his embrace that his body wanted her. She didn't like seeing him so confused. He dropped his head to her shoulder and inhaled. She wanted him to accept that he was attracted to her, and maybe, he always would be. It wouldn't be so bad if they were together. Why couldn't he see he was being damn obstinate about this? The sooner he got over what had happened and came to terms with their relationship, the better.
"Karma." Rea finally broke the silence. "You have to move slowly at first. Gears said it'd take time for you to get all your strength back. Your body needs time to recover from the drugs he gave you."
Karma nodded, but she didn't want to talk. She was basking in the excitement of Rea holding her. For the moment, even if his actions were only because he was helping her, it didn't matter. She wanted to enjoy having him touch her again. Cautiously, she let her hands slide up and around his neck to cling to him.
"Don't," Rea whispered and swallowed hard.
"Do you mean that?"
"No"
Gently she pulled his mouth to her seeking lips. She gave him every opportunity to pull away or shove her back onto the bed, but he didn't. Defeated, he dropped his mouth to enclose her lips. His warm breath filled her.
A knock on the door brought them both out of their trance. Rea pushed her toward the bathroom. She stumbled and then stood gripping the door frame. She heard Rea mumble something about being stupid, and she held the door handle while he headed to his computers.
"It's Ken. I was expecting him. Get into the bathroom. I'll call you when he's gone. I need to find you some clothes."
"I thought naked and tied to your bed was an option."
That drew a grin out of him, but he didn't respond. Instead, he waved his arm in a gesture that she supposed was "get moving."
Karma slowly shuffled into the other room.
As soon as the door closed behind her, she could vaguely hear Rea and another deep male voice in the other room. She tried hard to listen, but she couldn't make out anything and gave up. She decided she didn't care right now. She would take a long, hot shower and get clean. Then she was going to come up with a plan. She needed to figure out how to get Rea to keep her with him after Fletcher was dead.
Her father had told her once that if she put her mind to something, she could figure out how to get it. He said nothing was out of her reach. The first thing she wanted was Rea. She wanted him with all his weaknesses and strengths. Karma understood him in a way she was sure no one else ever could. She believed that with time and effort, they could be a real "we."
Karma considered whether if she acted fragile it would force Rea to take care of her. They would spend lots of time together if Rea thought she was weak. Karma discharged that idea as soon as it came. No, if she wanted Rea, she would have to play with her cards on the table. No lies. That's what she was sticking to.
Karma took her time brushing her teeth and using the bathroom. She was exasperated at how the easy act of showering was now difficult. As she moved the best she could, she made sure to not push herself too hard.
When she finally grabbed a towel, she heard a rap on the door. The thump echoed off the tiled walls as she reached for the towel bar to support herself.
"Karma? Ken's gone." Karma heard Rea's muffled voice as he opened the door a sliver. She was having a hard time moving quickly enough to answer. She expected him to burst in and make sure she wasn't breaking his rules.
Sure enough, after about a minute, the door opened. Rea stood in the doorway like an avenging angel. Karma ignored him and kept drying off her body.
"What're you doing?" He looked her up and down.
"You know—" She stopped herself from laughing. "I think, you have a knack for asking silly questions in the bathroom. I'm drying off after my shower. It's slow, my muscles hurt. My everything hurts."
Rea shook his head and snatched the towel out of her hands. She expected him to be rough with her because his mood was as stormy as the wind on the surface, but his actions were gentle. Gingerly, he patted her skin and then scooped her up in his arms.
"Don't get used to this," he muttered into her hair. She smiled as she held onto him tightly.
"I was thinking about how lucky I am to have a big strong man take care of me. It's all very romantical, being swept off my feet." Karma laid it on thick, and her comment drew a reluctant smile out of him.
Rea set her on the bed and arranged the blanket before sitting next to her hip. She was thrilled he stayed by her side, but she didn't want to say anything in case he changed his mind.
"Why do you always mention luck? You know it doesn't exist. Hard work and perseverance are how you survive in the world. Luck is as useless as faith. Those things aren't real."
Karma regarded him thoughtfully. He meant what he said, but it sounded like his father talking instead of him.
"My dad totally believed in luck. So much so that before I'd go on a job, he'd play one hand of poker with me. If I beat him, then I left; and if I didn't, he'd postpone the job until Lady Luck had returned to my side. I know life is about hard work, but it made him feel better, and honestly, it made me feel better too. Sometimes when you're scared, it's nice to feel like something or someone is on your side."
"That's nuts." Rea fluffed her pillow. She could see he was thinking more about what she'd said. "The cards you had on you when you first showed up makes sense now."
Karma smiled and thought about her father.
"Yeah, those cards were my dad's. I agree it is a bit silly, and it's not really a good way to live your life, but I think life is a mixture of luck, hard work, and faith in something. Maybe it comes down to finding all three."
Rea leaned back against the headboard and was silent. He looked lost in thought, and she hoped this didn't end up in an argument. Right now, fighting with him was the last thing she wanted to do.
"Ken says he believes in luck. Gears is always going on about faith, and my dad thought hard work was a religion. When I think about it, none of them seems any happier than I am. We're all looking for something, but we don't know what we want. Does that make sense?"
"That's an altogether different question, isn't it? What are you looking for? Are you looking for happiness?"
"Happiness is out of my reach." Rea sounded so sincere his tone made her heart hurt. She didn't want him to ever think that.
"That's your dad talking. You can have anything you want."
"Anything I want?" His eyes studied her face. A smile touched his lips. She saw the grin right before it vanished.
"Anything." She giggled now that his mood had lightened some.
Both Karma and Rea fell silent again. After a short while, he got up, hiding a yawn.
"Where're you going?" Arranging her face into a disinterested mask, she kept the note of desperation out of her voice. She kept it out, but only just barely.
"I can't sleep with you, and it's late, and I'm tired. I'm going to get comfortable in my chair." He gestured to the office chair in front of his computer. Karma glared at the seat like it was a beckoning female rival.
"You're not sleeping in a hard, uncomfortable desk chair. That's silly. The bed is big enough for both of us, and you're sleepy. Just be here with me."
Rea's face showed his indecision, and she could see his fatigue all of a sudden. She wasn't sure how she'd missed it before, but now she saw his haggard appearance. He hadn't shaved. Dark circles stood out under his green eyes. She wasn't drowsy, but then again, she'd been sleeping for days.
"Rea, what's the problem?" she asked when he kept standing.
"I'm not going back to sleeping with you." His voice had a thread of doubt in it.
"It is sleep only. We've lots of issues, but it doesn't mean you should be kicked out of your bed."
Reluctantly Rea climbed onto the mattress with a sigh. Once his head was on the pillow, he turned his back to her. After a second, he turned to face her and then switched again.
"Now what?"
"I'd hate for you to stab me in the back." One of his eyebrows rose and sarcasm dripped from his lips.
"Very funny."
Rea sighed. "I don't want to put my back to you, but I don't want to face you. If I face you, you might think I'm making some kind of move on you." He appeared so torn that Karma had to dig deep not to laugh at his logic.
"I won't knife you in the back. I'm naked and unarmed, remember." She put her hand on his shoulder and the action stopped his spinning.
"I've not forgotten." He yawned.
Karma carefully ran her fingers through his hair. He didn't stop her. He murmured nonsense sleepily and snuggled closer instead.
"You're drained, aren't you?" she commented more to herself as he relaxed.
She continued to run her fingers over his head and neck until he was completely pressed up against her body.
"I stayed up with you while you had that fever."
Those words lifted her spirits, and she wanted to tell him that they were a "we."
"How very romantical," she murmured instead as she kept her smile to herself.
"Ken wasn't shocked you came back. After I told him everything about you, he said you sounded like quite the girl, a real keeper." Rea's murmur was languid, and Karma wasn't sure he realized he talked.
She didn't comment. Instead, she thought about what she should do to protect him while she was here. She also tried to come up with a way for the two of them to heal as a pair.
It was a bit of a struggle to heal a relationship after you'd shot someone.
Still, she'd had struggles in the past, and she always got it figured out. If anyone could do it, Karma was sure she could. All it would take would be faith, luck, and a lot of hard work.
***
If you are with me so far... COOL! Feel free to vote or comment or whatever. I appreciate it. Cheers! C.M. ~