Y / N'S POV
As soon as BTS were told about Bang's arrest, they rushed to the station where he was being held, where they are now. I don't know why they arrested him.
But I have assumptions, and I hope I'm wrong tho. I've been trying to call Hyolyn all day. But she doesn't answer, the voice mail always goes in. I walk back and forth in my room, no one was informing me.
I didn't know what to do, I felt useless. I'm worried, for everyone. I tried to call Namjoon, but he didn't pick up too. Not knowing anything was freaking me out.
After a couple of hours, Namjoon called me, he seemed very tired, they came back during the night. Bang hasn't been released, he was accused of money laudering and all the other things that Hong is actually guilty of.
I suspect it was Hyolyn.
But could she really betray our trust in this way? I thought she would respect my choice to not use that way, and above all, that document I found. But ... why was Bang arrested and not Hong?
I asked how the others were, and the answer is predictable. They are sad.
And in all this, I can't do anything. In the end ... Bang is not as bad as I thought, he had his reasons. He did everything to protect me and Jungkook, to prevent us from hurting ourselves.
But it didn't help, it still hurts. Very bad. And the worst thing is that I can't stop loving him, I miss him so much. A part of me would like to not care, go to him and be with him, but the other part, the reasonable one, knows that it isn't possible.
All this mess we've been through, for what? What did we suffer for?
Some light knocks on my already half door bring me abruptly to reality. It's Namjoon and Jungkook.
As soon as our eyes meet, we stop for a second, but it seemed as if the whole universe had stopped too, as if someone had paused. A wave of feelings overwhelm me all at once, I feel flooded. I'm suffocating in the oxygen.
I can hardly say hi to him.
They enter timidly, they had dark circles, they were tired.
I tell them to sit comfortable, asking why they came to me after spending half of the night in the police offices to find out what accusations Bang was accused of.
《I wanted to know how you were, actually, we.》 he says, looking at Jungkook who was sitting on a chair, stiff, biting his lower lip.
《I'm ok. But you didn't come here just for that, right?》
Namjoon purses his lips in a straight line《we both know who did this to Bang.》 he says seriously. I suppose he's referring to Hyolyn.
It didn't take a genius to know who had made the "spy" in this situation, how ironic.
I sigh 《I know ... but I can't contact her, it's like she disappeared into nothingness.》 I felt guilty.
I just wanted to talk to Hyolyn, to understand why she had acted behind my back. I know that her mission was important, but was it really necessary to have Bang arrested?
《Next week the shareholders have organized a meeting, to nominate the new CEO, since Bang is no longer there.》 I nod, not understanding where he wanted to go.
《Hong, he proposed to be the next CEO.》he says in a serious but worried tone.
《What?》 I take my face in my hands forlornly, the situation couldn't get worse.
I let myself fall on my bed with a dead weight. With wide eyes I stare at an empty corner of my room 《it's a disaster.》
《We must make the way to prevent everything.》 I nod to Namjoon's words. But how?
We are just artists. We have no say in matters about the company. They would never listen to us. If only Hyolyn was here, she is a shareholder, she has a voice among everyone.
I desperately need to talk to her. I am getting worried. She wouldn't leave like that, in nothing after throwing that bomb, would she?
Namjoon and Jungkook return to their dorm, they couldn't think clearly, they were too tired.
As soon as they leave Y / n's room, Jungkook confesses something he hasn't told anyone yet, though it was pretty obvious.
《Hyung ... it hurts.》 his voice hoarse from holding all the emotions of today, looking down.
《I know Jungkook, but why did you come despite you know you are hurting each other?》 He says, stopping him by his shoulder. The older didn't know what to do to help him, not that there is something he could actually do.
He could only stay close to him, comfort him, he didn't want to leave him alone for too long. Not after what Y / n had told him. He was afraid that he would go back to those fights, too many things happened that could push him to make that wrong choice again.
《I still want to know how she is, if she eats well, if she is practicing, if she makes mistakes with the choreography. If- if she think about me, like I do of her.》
He says in one breath, he fights the urge to cry. He just needs to see her.
《I still love her.》he says, looking up at his hyung. His voice sounds like a whisper.
Namjoon stares at him, feeling sad for the two of them, two lovers who can't be together. It wasn't fair.
He sighs from his nose, rests his hand on his shoulder, squeezing lightly. Jungkook knows he can rely on him and others, but maybe that's not enough.
His hyung goes away after talking with Jungkook. He was alone in his room, it was late at night, they had spent all night in those offices, but he was not sleepy, not anymore.
Jungkook felt so frustrated, seeing Bang's face like that, hurt him. It added more pain to what he already had.
JUNGKOOK'S POV
I wish I could delete everything.
Not her, not the beautiful moments spent together, not even the members, just this whole mess that was being created.
Shit, how is it possible that one man, Hong, created all this pain? It's destroying everyone I love.
And Y / n ... she doesn't seem to be doing well. I know her, she always tries to hide behind her mask, she hides the pain. But I know she is hurting like me.
I walk in my room, back and forth. Unsure of my thoughts. My body would like to go to her. My mind would like to pass out and let this period pass.
I puff several times. I need to let go of all these thoughts and anger I am feeling. In my mind an idea makes its way, even if I know it's wrong. But I can't help but be tempted.
Should I try again?
No. Jungkook, don't even think about it. Last time you risked your life. And your hyungs life too.
I take my phone in hand, open a chat and without thinking too much about it, I send a message.
"Jk: are you awake?"
Jungkook, what the actual fuck are you doing? I curse myself mentally.
I throw the phone on the bed, pull my hair back, moaning frustrated between my lips. My head snaps surprised when I hear the ringing of my phone.
She answered me?
I quickly take the phone and unlock it and immediately click on the message. Ah ... it's not her. She didn't answer. Why should she? But she read the message. So she's awake, and deliberately didn't respond.
Maybe it's better this way. She'll think I'm crazy. Why should I send her a message? I don't even know. It's better if she doesn't answer me.
The phone vibrates in my hands, lazily I look at the screen, my eyes become two big "O", the phone falls from my hands, but I catch it on time.
I open the chat, my hands tremble, I don't even know why I feel so anxious, but also so damn happy.
"Y / n: yes."
I stare at her answer, I bite my lip, what should I respond? I release another annoyed snort. It's so unnerving.
"Jk: can we meet?"
What am I doing? Yeah I'm definitely going out of my mind.
"Y / n: now?"
"Jk: yes. please?"
"Y / n: ok ..."
What do I tell her now? I didn't think she would accept. Why did I ask her to see me? At this time of night.
Jungkook, it's simple. Because you miss her, and you want to see her, my conscience tells me.
Sigh. I leave my room, but first I take something from the drawer, and put it in my pocket. The last message was to meet at the practice room. I arrive at destination, the light was on, she must have already arrived. I go in by silent steps, looking at her.
She was sitting on the floor, using lazily her phone.
《Hey.》 I go inside, she snaps her head towards me, smiling. God, she is so beautiful.
《Hey.》she answers.
I sit next to her, we both smile at each other.
《Can't sleep?》 I ask, she nods.
We are silent for a while, looks that sometimes meet, fleeting glances. We both want to talk, but nobody speaks.
Is it possible to go crazy and be calm at the same time? That's what I'm feeling right now. It's hard to explain.
I'm goinh crazy because I can't be with her. But I'm calm, because I'm with her now.
Every cell in my body would like to take her face, and kiss those lips that are now curved in a small smile, she is smiling to herself.
《What are you thinking?》I place my head on the palm of my hand, looking at her.
《At that night ... where,》 clears her throat 《for the first time, you taught me to dance DNA.》she smiles at me.
《You know, after that time, I still wonder, why me.》she tells me in an embarrassed tone.
Isn't it obvious? From the moment my eyes were lucky enough to meet her, everything changed. I remember it hit me like a volcano in the face. Not that I know how it feels to have lava spilled on your face. But the warmth, was the same.
I remember watching her from afar, she was talking with other people. That day, I stood in the middle staring at her for I don't know how long, until someone called me.
I thought it was just a momentary thing, passing. No one had ever made me such an effect. But I realized that day after day, I continued to think of this girl, the only female trainee of the agency.
From that day on I continued to watch her from afar. Thinking of her as if she were an untouchable white rose. Unattainable. Impossible.
Until I found out she was training in the night in the practice room. I used to go there every night just to watch her. And that was enough for me, it was enough to look at her, watching her while she danced was a feast for the eyes. I'm not a creep tho, trust me.
I studied her every move, her stubbornness in not giving up even in the most difficult choreographies. To her laughter, to her puffs, to all those times she jumped happily after doing correctly a choreo.
But at some point ... it wasn't enough for me to just look at her. I wanted more. I became greedy, greedy for her. And that's where it all started. That night while she was trying to learn DNA, I found my chance to get closer to her.
《Well ...》 I scratch my neck, embarrassed, shifting my gaze to her, staring at me curiously, waiting for my answer.
《It was ... it's, love.》I answer with a shrug, as if I were accepting this truth more than everyone. It was so simple, yet, love is one of the most difficult things to explain. And I'm not good with words. I smile at her rose-colored cheeks.
《Ah!》 I recall the object I had brought with me 《I must give you something.》
With the tip of my tongue out, I look for the item I needed in my pocket.
Y / n stares at me confused and curious at the same time. I take out the thing I needed.
Y / N'S POV
I see him pulling out a black felt box, and hands it to me, I look at the box on his palm, and I look back at him.
《I wanted to give it to you before, but then all those things happened and-》 pauses 《and I haven't had the chance anymore.》last phrase was sadder.
He encourages me to take the box, and so I do. I thank him embarrassed. The last thing I expected was a gift from him. Maybe he wanted to give it to me before? When? The day we went to the amusement park?
I open the box and inside there is a necklace, silver, shiny. The pendant is a white, delicate, small, pure rose. It's beautiful, but I can't accept it, I close the box and hand it to him again.
《Jungkook ... I can't-》 he blocks my hand.
《Please accept it. The origin of this gift was another, but I still want it to be yours. Please.》he almost asks me pleading.
I think about it a little. 《Okay ...》 I give up.
He smiles happily, despite the visible fatigue is drawn on his face. He takes the necklace out of the box, and tells me to stand up. Without protest I do it.
My face is facing the large mirror of the practice room, he is behind me, trying to open the hook.
His hands touch the curvature of my neck for a moment, the necessary to hook the two ends of the necklace.
That little touch was enough to make me flinch slightly. As soon as its hooked he looks at me from the mirror, we both look at the necklace.
It's really beautiful, it's one of the most beautiful gifts I've ever received. Perhaps, it's the only one.
《It's just as I imagined it.》 his breath hits my skin from behind.
Our eyes rise, we look at each other intensely, through the mirror. He puts his hands on my shoulders. Chills. His hand goes down towards my breast, but stops first, taking the pendant, arranging it better. Without interrupting our eye contact.
I turned to him, our bodies were so close, I felt my legs tremble. I could feel my heart beating fast, my blood pumping in my ears, my throat dry. I know I shouldn't feel these things. But I can't help it. I love it.
《Thank you, Jungkook.》 I whisper.
He takes my face in his hand, the thumb caresses my cheek, as he had done so many times before. I close my eyes to savor that moment as much as possible.
I feel the warmth of his body, mingling with mine. My eyes snap open when I feel his lips press against mine. And it's a beautiful feeling. But also so wrong.
But I didn't care. I didn't care if it was wrong. Only we know it. Only we are witnesses of everything. I close my eyes and bind my arms around his neck, pushing him towards me, to deepen the kiss.
God, I missed his lips, his hands around me, his skin. His hands go to my waist, holding me tightly. Our lips united, in a last, painful, final dance.
[...]
Y / N'S POV
I'm starting to worry seriously. Hyolyn has been missing for days, and doesn't respond to calls or messages. And the meeting to nominate the new CEO of BigHit is upon us.
Now that I think about it, she has always been very mysterious about her life. I don't know where she lives, I don't know if she has a family or friends to ask. She was a spy indeed.
Maybe I should report her disappearing?
I was walking towards Hyolyn's office with all these thoughts in mind. The agency is in chaos. Bang's arrest has all brought sadness, everyone feels a little lost. The lawyers are doing everything possible to show his innocence.
Hong never shows up at the agency, he knows that if he shows his face, he risks his life. And not knowing what he is doing is a bit worrying me. What if it had to do with the disappearance of Hyolyn?
I enter Hyolyn's office, hoping to find some clue or maybe a hidden message from her. I start by checking her desk.
Everything is as always, impeccably in order, everything was in the right place. Only her personal items were missing, which were reduced to her cell phone, computer and bag. She never brought anything else.
I open the desk drawers, I find nothing, they are completely empty. Indeed, too empty, it's as if someone had taken everything, even the dust. It's very strange.
I look around, go to the bookcase, but there was nothing there either. I'm starting to feel frustrated. Is it possible that she disappeared like this? Without telling me anything? Maybe I didn't count so much for her as I thought.
I sit in her swivel chair, I swing with one leg, staring into space. I tried to think of everything except all these problems. Especially to Jungkook.
I often found myself thinking about him and all the moments spent together. Especially the last one, my hand goes automatically to the necklace, I roll the pendant between my fingers. Is it okay if I wear it? I do not know. But it gave me strength. It's like having him always near me.
My knees hit the desk due to door noise. Someone knocked hard. I remain at attention, I try to listen to every sound, and I am silent.
The person on the other side keeps knocking. What should I do? Answer to enter? It's not even my office.
《Miss Y / n?》a muffled voice from the other side, which I do not recognize.
《Yes?》
The door opens, revealing a man in a suit and tie, completely black. Even his hair. He didn't look very old. His eyes go straight to me.
I swallow, I don't know what, but there was something strange. I had never seen him before. An ugly feeling creeps into me. I don't know if it's my mind that plays tricks on me, or if it's the serious and dark expression of man that makes this effect. He was already sitting in front of me.
《Hi, I'm Agent Kwon.》 He was very stiff with his back, only now did I notice he had a suitcase with him.
《I was a colleague of Hyolyn and I am here-》
《Do you know where Hyolyn is?》 I ask without thinking, interrupting him.
I was so focused on my question that I didn't realize he was talking about Hyolyn in the past.
He gives me a sorry face, but it lasts for a few moments, then comes back with his expression, impassively. He pulls out something from his suitcase that he didn't give up a second.
He holds a tablet in front of me, setting it straight towards my face. I look up at him again, waiting for him to explain something to me.
《I suppose you don't know anything. Inside this tablet, there will be a video, where everything will be explained to you.》
Again, more truth? Still things I don't know? I'm starting to get tired of all these things. He gets up from his chair, saying he was waiting for me outside. He said that surely I would have had questions.
As soon as he comes out closing the door, I turn on the tablet, I go to the gallery where there is only a video that lasts several minutes. Everything seemed so strange. I felt so confused and frustrated. I start the video.
For the first few seconds there is total black, until Hyolyn appears. Her bare-face, but still beautiful. She didn't have her usual elegant suit, she had normal clothes on.
"Hi Y / n." I see her hands move over her thighs "If you ever see this video, it means that ... I'm dead."
My breath dies in my throat.
I pause the video. Did I hear right? I swallow while I restart the video. But she says the same thing. I restart it a couple of times. I drop my back on the chair, staring into space.
She's dead? Hyolyn ... is she dead?
Before the sadness and pain take over, I recover and continue to watch the video. It was always her, she was explaining something, she seemed very relaxed. I wasn't at all.
The continuation of the video is of her explaining that it was she who sent the documents that were used to arrest Bang, the same documents I found some time ago, the ones I didn't want to use.
Of course, Bang would have been arrested, but they would have had to arrest Hong too. But somehow, that bastard managed to get away with it, putting all the blame on Bang.
"I had calculated everything to perfection. But Hong already knew my intentions, he discovered it probably when I gave my resignation."
She continues to explain that she had resigned after she sent the documents to Bang. When Hong saw her resignation, he became suspicious and made his inquiries.
"But when I realized he knew everything, it was too late. Bang was accused of everything in Hong's place, I couldn't do anything anymore, and that happened today."
I pause again. I try to absorb all this information. After a while I put the play back, and Hyolyn explains why she had to do this, although I didn't agree to use those documents.
She no longer had a choice, she was in a corner, they were pressuring her because the mission had lasted too long and moreover Hong became more and more dangerous. She thought she could do it. But she failed, paying with her life.
"I had some wonderful moments with you Y / n. Forgive me if I couldn't protect you and stand by you." and it is there that all my strength collapsed. Truth hit me hard.
I begin to cry, realizing that she was gone. She left this world. She left me. And maybe some family.
Without Hyolyn, how can I deal with everything?
"I don't know who or what will kill me, even if I imagine it." She says laughing sarcastically.
She can make jokes even when she's dead.
"But I want you to know that, if you see this video, I really loved you" the edges of her eyes were filled with tears. But she manages not to cry.
I surrender totally to my tears.
"I can only do one thing to make sure you have something to fight against Hong. The person who gave you the tablet will explain everything to you."
Hee face gives me one last smile and sentence before the video ends "don't give up, Y / n. You're strong."
After that, the replay symbol appears. Leaving me completely dry. I didn't want to believe that Hyolyn was gone.
It's not possible.
It's a joke. It's not really happening. I banged my fists on the desk, trying to hold back the screams that I felt pressing in my chest.
My eyes do nothing but pinch me after all these cries.
I didn't want to believe that Hyolyn ... was dead. The situation could not get worse. Everything is useless and meaningless. The man returns inside, hearing the mess I was doing. I watch him as he approaches, standing in front of me.
《Condolences, she was a formidable colleague. She gave body and soul.》He says with his face without emotions 《but the real reason why I'm here, is to grant her last wishes.》
He takes his suitcase, takes some papers and puts them in front of me.
《Hyolyn left her BigHit shares to you.》