I had a boyfriend. It was exciting and new, addicting even. Yet, totally terrifying and although I convinced my self I wouldn't let my past control me. There future is what seem to make me nervous. After reading tones Buzzfeed articles and Teen Magazine columns I soon learned that everyone was nervous in the beginning of a relationship yet, it's known to be the most wonderful parts of one. I also realized that having a boyfriend made me more self conscious , I was always fucking confident. I stared at my self in the mirror still not pleased with my outfit. Jasper and I had made it official just a day ago and figured the first day of our relationship could use a nice outfit.
" You're knocking on my door at 6 am for what again?" Gurney asked sleepy against the doorframe. His hair messier than usual and his bare chest on display as he wore a cotton slip rob.
" How's my outfit?" I repeated as I stood outside his front door. The halls where empty most people tucked in their beds gathering dreams from the Sand Man.
Gurney rubbed his face exhausted "Great." He replied laziness. " Now go home." He groaned closing the door, but I quickly stopped him.
" Please Gurney, I'm serious." I pleaded.
He sighed leaning his head against the door frame his eyes fluttering shut. " I'll be at your place in 5. Unless you want to endure my morning breath now?"
I scrunched my noes at the thought as Gurney obnoxiously exhaled. " See you in 5."
He closed the door in my face and I trotted back to my condo. Hazel was gone again, Dad had dragged her parents out of the woodworks to help clean up the mess she made with her senior citizen husband. So once again I was home alone, and in desperate need of advice. I wanted to look good, well better than usual. Jasper's opinion mattered. So yeah, I woke Gurney up at 6am wanting help picking an outfit for school even though I doubt Jasper would even be there to see it. I was hoping their was chance.
As I waited for Gurney I stared at my outfit for the 4th time.
My grey plaid skirt hugged my figure. I was on the itty bitty titty community but that didn't stop my small boobs from being peaking out white shirt that had 3 lace ties right over my chest. My lips where stained with cherry red lipstick and my dark hair in a ballerina bun showing off my pearled ear rings.
" My Mom's a plastic surgeon. She could make you a fatter ass." Gurney comments as entered the room this time wearing a shirt and his hair in a man bun. He flopped down on my bed as if it was his and examined me.
I tossed a pillow at him " Tell her to make your ugly ass a new face."
He scoffed " Why do that when this ones already perfection?"
I place my hand on my chin thinking " Has web-ester changed the defection of perfection?"
" No but they added an image of your ass. Right by the definition of flat."
Once again I tossed one of my pillows at him easily knocking him upside the head while he laughed. " Dick." I insulted trying to hold back a smirk.
" Why are you up this early any way? You got pneumonia or something?"
I roll my eyes at his question. "You mean insomnia. This is why you shouldn't be homeschooled K-12 isn't teaching you shit. And if you haven't figured it out brainy act us regular kids go to school at 6am."
" School? Is that why wearing you're dressed like Britney Spears in that Baby One More Time Video?" He asked
I frown looking at myself in the mirror. " I look like a Sluty SchoolGirl?"
Gurney shook his head. " Nah, you give it more class." I sigh in relief .
"Like an escort instead of a prostitute" He added casually.
"Gurney!" I exclaimed not finding it funny sending another pillow his way.
" I'm kidding!" He laughed" You look great. You always look great Kins. Why are you asking me this shit anyway?"
I didn't reply. Silence seemed to be the only answer he needed. " It's Jasper isn't it?"
Blush crept over my face at the mentioning of his name.
" Yeah," I said coyly. " Where.. uh dating now."
" Finally. Seems like you guys have been dragging this on forever." He commented.
I shrug " I wanted to take my time. I didn't want to rush into things. Especially a relationship. It's like when you read those relationships novels and they start dating in the 5th fucking chapter." I scoffed " Everything gets so boring after that. The slow pace is the best pace." Even the fact that I was now in relationship. I wanted to take things slow. It was foreign to me. I had never been in a relationship where I had feelings for the other person. A relationship that was actualy real.
" I'm happy for you Kin, I really am. I just..." He stopped himself. Gurney's attitude had shifted no longer sarcastic or smug. His expression was genuine with concern.
" I don't think you should put you're all into this."
I frown. " What?"
" I'm saying don't fall in love Kinsley." He clarified bluntly.
Taking me by surprise. " Jasper's a great guy and he makes you happy. He's smart which is the kind of guy your dumbass needs." He jokes hoping to lighten the mood.
" But, you've got plans Kin. The kind the plans that you've been dreaming off since we were kids."
" What are you getting at Gurney. If this is that " Rich girl, Poor Guy bullshit" save it." I replied defensivly.
" I'm just saying. You're going to New York, you're getting into Juilliard. No matter how great of a guy he is. Don't let your plans change for him. You're in love with dance not him.You've worked too hard to flip the switch now."
His words had shaken me. It was too soon to be thinking of the clock that hung over Jasper and I's relationship it had barely started but I was quiet enough I could hear the soft tick of the clock that left me alarmed. I understood what Gurney was saying. And the idea I had of diving headfirst was replaced with me just dipping my toe into the ocean of romance. Fear was no longer in me, yet Caution was. But then again as much I tried to convince myself there was a difference, I really didn't think there was one. Maybe I should be reckless, dive in head first to allow myself to feel the something I never did. Allow myself to feel of value and of importance allow my life to be sappy romantic novel and deal with the consequences after. I didn't want just a taste of Jasper, a taste of love. I wanted it all. Because I never had anything like it before.
I could ignore the clock, act as if it wasn't there. Let the ticks of clock blend in with the love songs that would play in the background. And maybe it would be Cinderella story when the clock finally did strike. I would leave him with my lip stick staining in his neck. And run off to New York a kingdom of its own.
" Why should I take your advice? You can't see a good girl when she's standing in front of you. Because your to busy pinning over Beatrice."
" I'm not pinning." Gurney stated. " And who's right for me oh Holy Match Maker?
I smile proudly at the title taking a seat on my bed next to Gurney " Fawn."
Gurney let's a laugh. " The girl from the show?"
I nod. " The one you where obviously flirting with."
Gurney smirks " She's cute."
A hopeful smile spreads across my face.
" But not my type."
I scoff. " What are you talking about she's perfect. So perfect that your going to ask her out."
" Says who?"
I playfully roll my eyes." Says the Oh So Holy Match Maker. That's who." I teased
" And if I don't?"
I raised an eyebrow as the corner of my lips curved into a devious smile. " I'll tell your Mom about the time the cops came because your threw a party while she was gone."
" That's because you fucking called them you Prick." He exclaimed through laughter.
I shrug " Shouldn't have been so loud."
" Whatever , I'll ask the girl out. But don't expect marriage and baby carriages and shit" I look over at Gurney with smile thrilled by the news. " Only if I'm the Godmother."
" Sure, and you can be my Best Man at the wedding." He taunted.
" I know you meant that as an insult, but I can't help but be flattered by it. When I get married you'll be by my Man of Honor." I wrapped my arm around his shoulder.
Gurney held a glint of amusement in his eyes.
" Oh Twinkles Toes." He said patting my back as if he was consoling me from bad news. " No ones marrying your Ugly ass."
" Fuck you!" I cursed while he bursted in laughter. " We can't ever have a sentimental moment because of your bullshit."
" You're right I'm sorry. I got you a gift if it makes you feel any better."
" Aww Gur."
Gurney hands me an envelope. And my face falls and I scowl at him. " This is my mail you dumb ass."
" It's a gift." He responded " The mail got switched up. I figured this ones important."
I opened the envelope greeted by a decorative invitation. Disappointed flooding me. " The annual Christmas Charity Gala." I read out load.
" Shouldn't you be more excited about charity?" He asked
" It's a loud if bullshit. A coverup to make business men and women not seem like greedy self absorbed ass hats. 10 percent goes to charity the rest goes in their pockets." I explained.
Not only did I hate the Gala. I hated the company that was their. Every year Finn was my date. He loved it, the gala is where he shined. Having everyone fall for his charm and I was the trophy that sat on his arm. We where considered a "power couple" because together we where worth billions. People praised his father and mine for such a " strategic pair." We where in sin city yet pretending to be angels. Vegas, it was beautiful and bright, a second home really my Dad owned to many estates and business out their to count.
It was the capital of everything Pines and Ranger owned. It's the kingdom they owned.
Finn and I where Prince and Princess of Vegas. Literally Royalty when ever we visited. Cause they knew that one day we where destined to own it all. They had that look of envy, and admiration.We where good at playing in "love" but there is no love in this family everything is strictly business.
A few people saw it, and knew it yet still wanted what I had. A fake romance, a controlling Dad, and an Abusive boyfriend. But I guess instead of seeing it like that. They see the money we sit on.
" I think it'll be fun. You could invite Jasper." Gurney suggested.
" Jasper?" I hadn't thought of that. " I don't think, that's his kinda thing."
" It's Vegas. What's there not to like? Throw a suit on him take him out have a good time and piss everyone off. Win win. It wouldn't hurt to ask."
Me and Jasper going to the gala together? It was intriguing the idea sounded fun, but having him there with my Dad, with Finn? I don't think he'd be comfortable with that.
" Shit." I curse as I glance at the time. " I gotta go Gur. Lock up on your way out. And go read or do something!"
" Yeah, yeah." He brushed off, and flopped back in my bed."
I shove the invitation in my back pack.
I guess it wouldn't hurt to ask.