A/n - this isn't really a trigger warning, but this part will get very emotional as it is centered around a miscarriage. If you are of a sensetive nature, please proceed with caution xxx
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Mycroft-
Mycroft smiled sweetly as he lay beside you. One hand propped himself up on your bed, while the other laid gently on your stomach. At 4 months, it was smaller than you had expected it to be, but some research had confirmed that every pregnancy was different and that it was perfectly normal for some women to have smaller bumps early on... Mycroft traced circles on your exposed skin, painting invisible stars on your weakly taut skin. In the darkness of your bedroom, all you could do was stare at the sky while your husbands warm breath sent shivers down your neck and spine. When starring at one place on the ceiling, an inky mass would expand, seeping from the walls. On looking away, it would dissipate back into the air, reminding you that you were still awake.
"My stomach hurts..." you quietly mumbled for the sixth time that night. Mycroft leaned over and kissed your cheek, then helped you into a relaxed upright sitting position with a pillow behind yor back.
"I know darling, i know..." Mycroft cooed softly. His words were soothing but didn't ease the pain. "It's just a side effect of pregnancy sickness. Just think... in 5 months time, little Pierot is going to make you the happiest mummy in the world."
You smiled wildly and tears welled up in your eyes thinking about that hot little body against yours... what it would feel like. You placed your hands on your stomach and leaned against Mycroft's shoulder... you knew just as well as Mycroft, that parenting was going to be hard. A half-awkward silence settled on the room so you piped up jokingly to lighten the mood.
"Well, i guess untill until then I'll have to get used to being fat" you giggled as Mycroft slid closer wrapping his arms around you.
"Excuse me miss!" He chuckled, "you are not fat. Being pregnant just changes you, mentally and physically... you are just as beautiful as ever."
You smiled through the darknes, supressing the growing pain with thoughts of motherhood...
Suddenly, you heard a phone ring. It was weird. You had never heard that particular ring before... it was a high pitched, shrill call which lasted two seconds before cutting to a second of silence, and so on and so on.
"Oh dear... oh no, this can't be good." Mycroft rose feverishly from the bed and ran to his office. A long conversation later, he returned, pale as a sheet.
"(Y/n), precious, I am so, so, so sorry but I have to go. Now!"
Your heart began to pound like a snare in your chest and your forehead felt white hot. It was as if someone had grabbed your stomach and flipped ut upside down, allowing acid to leech through your system and brand you with pain
"W-what? Why?!"
"Business. VERY important business, I am so so sorry but a flight is waiting for me, I need to be in Russia as soon as possible. I'm sending John over, he'll look after you while I'm gone." He was growing more and more frantic by the second; "I'll be a few days, one week at the most. I love you, (y/n) stay safe!"
Through the kerfuffle, you were speechless. He kissed you on the lips and grabbed his bag before disappearing into the night. John turned up only 5 minutes later with a look of apology in his eyes.
"Are you okay (y/n)?" He said quietly, flicking the bedroom light on (you weren't going to sleep now anyway) and sitting by your side.
"Yeah, um.. no? Uh... oh John, i don't know! That was all just so sudden!" You quivered a little, biting your lip as the pain in your abdomen continued to swell. "Can i have a cup of tea?..."
"Of course."
As he left the room, you placed both hands firmly on your bump. Something was wrong... you could feel it...
---------- 3 days later ----------
John had barely left your side since Mycroft departed for Russia. You hadn't heard from your husband so you could tell he was extremely busy. As you perched on the end of your bed, you tilted your head to take in the evening view. The pinkish clouds where whipped up like clumps of wool and the copper sun was barely visible from behind the houses. You placed your hands behind you and leaned back slightly on the bed, inhailing deeply and shutting your eyes. Suddenly, you experienced a stab of pain in your stomach...
"Agh.." you coughed, leaning forward. The pain intensified... "Aghh! God!" You stood up and tried to walk to the door but your legs weakened and buckled under your weight...
"JOHN!! SOMETHINGS WRONG WITH THE BABY!!!"
---------- in the hospital ----------
The speed in which John had come to your aid was remarkable. Remarkable but futile.
Your body felt paralyzed in a cold sweat in the white sheets of your hospital bed. Your hands juddered uncontrollably and tears were pouring from your eyes. You couldn't stop it. Two hours of painful contractions and pushing... a stillborn son lay in your arms. Time of death, technically 8:17pm but who knows how long the mass was sitting lifeless inside you... You felt his cold little body up against yours. He was tiny. Barely recognisable as a child... little Pierot...
John sat by your side on a metal chair. His head was resting in his hands; he was traumatized.
"Mycroft called..." he whispered, "i told him what happened, he will be here soon..."
You shut your eyes, allowing the darkness to consume you. The towel in your arms held pain itself... slowly, a nurse entered the room.
"Ma'am... would you like me to take them back?..." she spoke softly and professionally. She had probably seen this a thousand times or more. Still, it never gets any easier.
"No..." you murmured, "my husband's coming... he deserves a chance to meet his son..."
She nodded her head respectfully and left. Leaving you and john in silence.
Through the silence, you heard footsteps approaching. They clipped against the laminated floors, filled with fear and sorrow. Mycroft soon pushed open the door.
The moment he laid eyes on little Pierot, he broke down. John quickly excused himself, leaving you alone. Mycroft collapsed to his knees by your side and began to cry until ugly, detached sobs distorted his breathing and he let out an anguished cry. A cry so filled with sorrow that hell could have frozen over...
"Mycroft..." you whispered, tears still clawing all over your exhausted face.
"(Y/n)... i should never have left... I'm, I-I'm so sorry..." he produced an oaky groaning noise from the bottom of his lungs. He was distraught...
"Mycroft." You stated firmly, "don't you dare blame this on yourself! You take the blame for a lot of things that arent your doing but this is too far... there was nothing either of us could do... i'm sorry..."
Mycroft's face was damp and red with tears... he bent over you, kissing your cold, shaky lips and cupping your face in his hands.
"(Y/n)... can I... c-can I... hold him?..."
Mycroft uttered, barely audibly through the ebbing tears.
You looked up into his eyes, nodding solemly as you passed him the near weightless bundle. Mycroft nearly lost controll again. His spasmodic diaphragm pulsated irregularly betwixt his ribs, causing his whole body to shake. He spoke as if he and Pierrot were the only two things on earth...
"Hello little man... I- I... why did you have to go?... we could have made you so happy... you could have made us so happy... why?... whh..w- w-why...?"
Tears once again streamed down his face as he handed the towel back.
You called for the nurse...
It was over...
---------- 2 years later ----------
"PUSH! Keep going! You're doing great!" The nurse encouraged as you strained for the last time... as you finally relaxed, you heard the best sound in the world... a cry, then two, then three. The baby was crying. That meant she was alive...
Mycroft leant down and hugged you excitedly
"Congratulations mummy... you've done it!"
You cried out in an immense weep of joy as the nurse passed you a small bundle... 7 pounds 2 ounces. Her hot little body pressed aginst your chest felt exactly as you imagined it would and you smiled through the tears at Mycroft who was resting his hand on your weak shoulder. He sighed with relief before speaking:
"Well baby Elizabeth... welcome to the family.."
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