004
"Ano'ng nangyari sa iyo, Zendrea?"
"Pwede ba, Daylan? Shut up!"
Nagkibit balikat nalang siya saka ako pinagbuksan ng pinto ng van.
For pete's sake! Hindi na naman ako makakapunta sa lugar na gusto ko. Limited lang lagi! Kainis! Bakit ba kasi naisipan ni manager na gamitin na ulit 'tong van ko? Urgh! Bwisit! Bwisit talaga!
"Zendrea? Wala kang balak sagutin 'yong phone mo?"
Ngiwing sabi ni Daylan. Kanina pa kasi ring ng ring 'yong phone ko.
Inirapan ko siya saka ko sinagot 'yong tumatawag, not even looking at the screen of my phone. Bahala na.
"Bakit ka tumawag?"
"Babe?"
Napabuntong hininga ako.
"Troy..."
"Not in the mood?"
Pinaglaruan ko 'yong dulo ng buhok ko.
"No, I mean. Sorry. Medyo stress lang."
I hear Troy, sigh.
Damn!
I feel really sorry for him. Napabayaan ko na si Toy. Wala na akong time para sa kaniya.
Ginagawan ko naman ng paraan. Yeah. The real reason why I'm always late? It is because of my fault. Oo,kasalanan ko.
For example: Late natapos 'yong taping. Hindi talaga ako uuwi sa condo ko. Diretso ako sa condo ni Troy. Kaya kinabukasan? Late ako. Kaya ayaw ko rin sa van and mayDriver pa. Mas gusto ko 'yong car ko. But now?
Mukhang may walanghiyang nagsabi o nalaman na ni manager 'yong totoo. I don't know. Basta ang alam ko? Naiinis ako at naiirita.
"It's okay. By the way. Let's have a date?" I bit my lower lip.
Minutes, had passed before I utter a word again.
"Zendrea..."
"Troy..."
I can't continue. Hindi ko matuloy ang sasabihin ko. I know, disappointed na naman siya o kaya magtatampo na ulit.
"I'm sorry, Troy. Maybe, next time? I have to attend the press conference."
Hinintay ko 'yong isasagot niya.
"Pang-ilan na naman bang tanggi 'to. I don't know. Hindi ko na mabilang, Zendrea. You don't have time for me. For us!"
"Troy..."
"What!? Zendrea!"
"Hindi naman pwedeng ganito lagi! For Pete's sake! Do I need to always...? Fuck! How about us? Paano naman 'yong relationship natin? Ano!? Lagi mo nalang isa-santabi? Ze---."
I cut him off.
"Troy, listen! Alam ko, kulang ako sa oras. Pero ginagawan ko naman ng paraan. Please. Intindihin mo naman 'yong situation ko. "
Nadagdagan na naman ako ng problema! This is really frustrating! I know kulang pero I am trying my best here! Damnit!
"I always understand every damn fucking situation, Zendrea! Always!! But how about mine? Hindi mo alam ang malagay sa sitwasyon ko. It's fucking hard to accept that, I'm just only an option!"
"Tang ina, kapag wala ka lang naman na taping at guesting, may time. Na bilang pa sa daliri!"
My mouth parted a bit on what I hear from him.
"You're not an option, Troy. How can you say that?"
Never kong inisip na option si Troy. Infact, priority ko rin siya. Pero minsan lang talaga? Kailangan kong mamili. Kasi naman. I didn't expect, that he will be mad at me. To think, na isipin niya na option ko lang siya. Hah! Ayoko na.
"What? So, ano ako?" Damn! Troy is really mad.
"You are my priority..."
"Priority? Really? Wow. So priority pala ako sa lagay na laging na-iisantabi. Babalikan kapag may oras at naalala lang? Seriously. Ganoon ba para sa iyo ang priority, Zendrea?"
I'm in verge of crying. Hindi naman nagalit ng ganito si Troy sa akin. He always understands me. Pero siguro he's right. Kulang na ako ng oras, for him. For us. And it is my fault. So I can't, blame him, in the first place.
"I'm so---."
"Bullshit! Ayoko na. Let's have a space for the meantime, Zendrea. We need a fucking space!"
"Tr--oy-" I cried. The line went off.
What should I do, now? He's really mad at me and maybe he won't even like to see my face.
"Daylan? Can you stop the van, for the meantime? I won't ditch, promise." He nodded his head.
I think, he knew what I'm pointing here, so he went out of the van. I let myself, cry.
For the meantime. Hindi dapat ako nagpabaya sa relationship namin ni Troy. I hate myself! Naiinis ako ng sobra sa sarili ko. Kahit pala 'yong taong iniintindi ka. Minsan, nasasagad rin. I am so selifish kasi I always thought na maiintindahan niya ako, Hindi dapat pala ako ganoon mag-isip. I am really guilty.
I took out my phone and texted Troy. I don't care if he hit a reply or don't, but the important is, he read my message.
To: Troy
| I'm sorry, Babe. Maybe you're right. We need a space. But please, Troy. Ayusin natin 'to. I'm really really sorry. I love you! |
Sent.
I put back my phone in my bag and I fix myself. Isasantabi ko muna 'yung problema pero aayusin ko 'to. 'Yong problema namin ni Troy.
Bumamaba ako sa van and call Daylan. "Okay ka na?"
"Yeah. Let's go. Baka malate tayo at magalit si manager."
He smiled and started the engine.
I sighed. I'm sorry Troy...
————
"Wow. Magaling hindi ka late!" Tipid na ngiti ang sinagot ko kay manager. Wala naman akong pwedeng ibang sisihin maliban sa sarili ko. To what happen to Troy and I.
Nagpaalam ako saglit kay Manager para magpahangin. But she only gives me a minute.
Kumapit ako sa railings, at saka ko niyukyok ang ulo ko roon.
"Problem?"
"Frost."
Urgh! Ano na naman ba! Bakit ba siya nandito? Ano bang problema niya sa akin? Lagi nalang siya susulpot sa kung saan, eh. Is this guy, is a mushroom?
"Yeah. Wanna share your problem?" I frown. Why in the hell, I'll tell my problem to him? Remember, Frost is Troy's brother. Whatever.
I won't tell him. "You're out of this."
He's really out of this.
Kumapit siya sa railings and sat. Ohmy!
"Hoy! Baliw ka ba? That's dangerous. Bumaba ka nga diyan. Ang taas ng lalaglagan mo, if ever!" I exclaimed.
"Okay." He did but he lean on me. That was close.
"Hey! Diyan ka lang. May atraso ka pa sa akin."
Pigil ko sa kaniya. With matching hand gestures pa.
"What?"
Maang-maangan siya ganoon?
I rolled my eyes.
" The kissed. Now, remember?"
Ngayon naman siya ang nag rolled eyes. And it shocked me. Damn, girl. Bakit ang gwapo pa rin niya! Gosh! What I'm talking about! Erase.That's so stupid of me.
"You don't need to tell me what's your problem, Zen. I knew it."
I crossed my arms. Talaga lang, huh. Ano siya? Manghuhula? Hello. Meron ba no'n sa panahon ngayon? Crazy.
"Then fucking tell me if you kow!"
Bigla akong kinilabutan sa ngisi niya.
"You," He step forward,
"And," and forward,
"My brother," and forward again.
"Had a little fight. Right, Zendrea?" And damn! His face was too close, to my face.
I step back. "How did you know that?" I almost whisper.
My eyes grew wide. Don't tell me...
"Gosh! Are you a fortune teller?" And, suddenly? He burst out. He's laughing! As in, okay, weird. May nakakatawa ba sa sinasabi ko?
Gadh! I stare at Frost, for a minute.
"Frost!" Does he have no plan, to stop from laughing?
"Sorry. Damn. But seriously? Where the hell did you get that? I am a fortune teller? You've got to be kidding me."
Inikutan ko siya ng mata.
"Fine! Sorry, So how did you know that Troy and I, you know. Had a fight?"
"Got you! So, nag-away nga kayo." he said, grinning. Napasibangot kaagad ako! Damn! Urgh!
Manloloko, naisahan niya ako!
"I hate you!" He got me. Shoot!
"But, honestly. He'll not entertain you,if you insist to talked with him."
I raised my brows. "And how, sure are you?"
He leans on me. There's 2 inches, distance pa naman. Saka niya nilagay sa likod ng tainga ko 'yong ilang hibla ng nagkalat kong buhok.
"Because Troy is my brother."
Oh shoot. Natulala ako. Pero nakabawi ako kaya lumayo ako sa kaniya.
"Anyway. I have an offer to you, Zendrea."
Seriously? Bakit kapag ngumingisi siya? Kinikilabutan ako? There's really something or fishy lang talaaga siya?
"Offer?" I frowned.
"Yes."
Nangnunot 'yong noo ko. Pero bigla akong kinabahan ng ilapit niya ng sobra 'yong mukha niya sa mukha ko and te touches my lips.
...And whisper something on my ear that made my whole system.
"Date me, Zendrea Monteferrer. Date me." Oh gosh!
What the hell is that kind of offer!
Date Finished: December 2014
Date Finished: February 24, 2016
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