“WHERE IS HE?”
Startled, my eyes shot open. Blinking I looked around, and realized I was in the hospital.
Suddenly the door swung open revealing a puffy eyed Luke, holding a coffee.
“Oh, hey,” he greeted, “You’re up.”
“What’s going on?” I demanded, “What happened? Where’s Michael? Why am I here?”
“Um….” Luke said slowly, sitting down in a chair next to me, “I….uh… I don’t know what you want me to answer first.”
“Where’s Michael?” I demanded.
Luke looked down sadly.
“Where’s Michael?” I repeated.
“Ashton,” Luke mumbled.
“Where is he?” I snapped, swinging my legs over the side of the bed, and pulling the Iv out of my arm.
“Ashton!” Luke shrieked, “You can’t do that!”
Placing my hand over my arm which was not bleeding I rose to my feet, only to have the ground tilt, everything around me spinning.
“Ashton,” Luke sighed, pushing me back onto the bed gently.
“What’s going on?” I demanded, squeezing my eyes shut, trying to stop everything from doubling in front of me.
“You have a really bad confession.” Luke informed me.
“What?” I asked.
“Or is it concession?”
“A concussion?” I demanded.
“Yeah!” Luke cried, sending a shooting pain through my skull, “That!”
“How long have I been out for?” I asked.
“I don’t know,” Luke sighed, “When they let me in here the big hand was on the twelve and the little hand was on the three.”
Glancing up at the clock on the wall which now read nine thirty, I tried to stand up again however Luke pushed me back down.
“Where’s Michael?” I demanded.
“He’s…. Ashton, he… it’s not your fault.”
“Where is he Luke?” I pleaded, “Tell me!.... please.”
Looking down at the coffee cup in his hands, Luke took a shaky breath before answering, “He’s in a comma.”
“A coma?!” I cried, standing up.
“Ashton sit down!” Luke snapped, gently pushing me down.
“No, he’s gonna be okay right?” I asked, “He… he’s going to be fine? I… I have to see him!”
“No, not right now Jess just got here, he’s with her.”
“This is all my fault!” I cried, burying my face in my hands, “He was…. He pushed me out of the way, he saved me! That should be me!”
“Don’t say that.” Luke sighed.
“It’s true!” I sobbed, “I wish it were me.”
“Ashton stop,” Luke whispered, looking close to tears.
“Why?” I demanded, “Why would he do that?”
“Do what? Save you?” Luke replied, “I would have done the same thing and so would Calum and you would have done the same thing for us, that’s what family does for each other.”
“What if he doesn’t wake up?” I cried, “What then Luke, I won’t be able to live with myself knowing….. I can’t… I can’t. God this is all my fault.”
Sitting down next to me on the edge of the bed, Luke wrapped his arms around me.
“He’ll be okay,” he informed me, “Too many people need him for him not to be.”
“God,” I whispered, “His family….where….where are they?”
“Mr. Clifford and Karen are in there with Jess.” He answered.
“And Des?”
Luke looked down at the ground.
“What?” I questioned.
“Ashton…. She…. Um.”
“What?” I demanded, “What aren’t you tell me?”
“She’ll cool down Ash, it’s just because she’s angry right now.”
“Luke what happened?”
Taking a deep breath, Luke looked at me, “She told me, to tell you that….God I can’t say it.”
“Luke please!”
“Ashton I can’t.”
“Luke, please, I’m begging you, you’re making it worse by not telling me!”
Rising to his feet, Luke tugged at his hair, “She told me to tell you that it’s your fault and she wishes it was you and she never wants to see you again.”
As soon as he was finished, Luke clamped his hand over his mouth.
“What?” I whispered.
“I’m sorry!” Luke cried, “Shit, I shouldn’t have told you Calum told me not to, God, Ashton forget I said anything!”
“She said that?” I croaked.
“No, no, she’s just angry right now, I mean how would you feel if it was your brother, she’ll come around.”
“This is all my fault.” I whispered.
“No, Ash please! Forget I said anything, that was stupid, I should have never to….”
“It should have been me!” I interrupted.
“Ash,”
“It should have been Luke! You three, you and Calum and Michael, you guys have been friends for years and then I come along and…. Mess everything up!”
“Don’t say that.”
“It’s true!”
“No it’s not! SO what if I’ve known Cal and Mikey longer you… you’re one of us Ashton, you always have been. The four of us…. I don’t know, we’re not like everybody else, we’re like big kid legos mixed in randomly with Duplo blocks. Alone, we’re like….. we’re rejects but together…. We’re like fantastic four or the Ninja turtles….we just…. we needed to find each other.”
Looking down at my hands I watched as a tear splashed onto my skin.
“What know?” I whispered.
“We wait.” Luke answered.
~
@5sexondsofHarryass : This tour fucking sucks, the only reason I bought tickets was to see 5sos tbfh not the damn vamps.
@5secondsofsexytime : If anyone wants WWA tickets I don’t want to go anymore.
@Calumscheeks : My heart hurts.
@mikeyismysunshine__ : What now? My only reason is gone.
@5SOSrmywonderwall_ : I don’t know what do anymore, I need Michael back.
@luke_is_adorkable : I’ve never prayed in my life but I’m praying for Michael.
@vampette_baby : How’s it feel murdering your “best friend?” @Ashton5SOS
@micahel_is_co0l : This stupid band of idiots saved me…. Now what?
@fuk_me_luke : I hate Ashton tbfh #sorrynotsorry this is his fault.
@cuddlycake18 : It just breaks my heart that Michael might never know how much he has helped me and so many others.
@vamp_sossss : I’m sad!1!1 #KillYourslefIfYouCareAboutMicahel.
@MikeysMacNCheese: @vamp_sossss BITCH stfu go back to your shit famdon and don’t start shit in ours.
@zaynspubes : TBH I HATE 5sos with a burning passion deeper then the pits of hell, but I’d rather them open for the boys then there’s fools.
@Harryspussyy : I’m sick of Mini hazza, gimpy, and the other two who I don’t give a flying fuck about. NO MORE VAMPS #DirectionersWantMichaelToGetBetterBecauseThisOtherBandMakesMeWantToPunctureMyEardrumsWithAshtonsDrumstickWhileNiallShovesPatatoesUpMyVagFollowParty
@californiacalum : Now is so not the time but I’m thirsty #DirectionersWantMichaelToGetBetterBecauseThisOtherBandMakesMeWantToPunctureMyEardrumsWithAshtonsDrumstickWhileNiallShovesPatatoesUpMyVagFollowParty
@5SOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOS : I love you @5SOS :(
Shutting off my phone I dropped it in my lap.
“What’s wrong?” Calum asked from his perch on the window seat in Michael’s hospital room.
“Everything,” I muttered hoarsely.
Sighing, I turned to look at Luke who was sat at Michael’s bedside next to Jess, where he was reading Michael a book.
“In two straight lines they broke their bread… how do you break bread…. Never mind, and brushed their teeth and went to bed….. this is stupid, they just eat then go to bed? That’s not healthy, you’re food just turns right to fat if you do that. That’s what Michael said.”
Offering him a watery smile, Jess looked down at her hand which held Michael’s gently.
Letting my eyes wander to Michael, the familiar heart cracking in my chest feeling came back. His eyes were framed by deep purple bags, and he wore a neck brace but other than that he looked like he was sleeping.
Suddenly the door swung open. Looking up I was surprised to find Destiny.
Her eyes sad, they widened, before narrowing in disgust as they landed on me.
“What is he doing here?” she demanded.
“Des don’t be a bitch.” Charlie sighed, from where were sat beside each other on the large leather chair in the corner.
“Why is he here?” Destiny repeated.
“Because we’re visiting Michael,” Calum sighed, “Either ignore him or make up or leave, I’m not dealing with your shit.”
Shooting my a disgusted look, Destiny, giving me a wide berth, made her way to the chair on the other side of Michael’s bed.
“How long has it been?” Charlie whispered.
“A week and a half.” Jess replied.
“How long before they… you know… pull the plug?” Calum muttered.
“A week.” Destiny answered.
“He’ll wake up.” Luke said positively.
Suddenly my phone buzzed, pulling it out of my pocket I frowned at the sight of a text from Brad of all people.
BradthevampsleadsingerSimpson@gmail.com: Merci! You French girls are tres sexy!..... oops thought I was tweeting my fans. Ttfn.
Shaking my head in disbelief I hastily typed a reply.
Me: They aren’t your fans you dumb shit, I hope you’re fucking tank room cracks and you drown.
BradthevampsleadsingerSimpson@gmail.com Someone’s in a pissy mood. When are the pulling the plug on the one with the bad hair
Me: FUCK YOU
BradthevampsleadsingerSimpson@gmail.com No thanks boo, I’ve got your fans to do that for me ;)
Me: Our fans wouldn’t touch your desperate eleven year old girl looking ass for all the merch in our store.
BradthevampsleadsingerSimpson@gmail.com : Tell me, who’s living my dream playing to thousands of screaming girls every night. What’s it like being a has been at the ripe old age of 20, and being the reason your band member is dead? Wait, never mind, don’t answer that, IDGAF I’m going to find one of your fans to blow me bye bye.
Disgusted I shut off my phone.
“What’s wrong?” Charlie asked.
“Brad,” I sighed.
“He’s pissing me off.” Calum spat, “I see him tweet about how our fans our his one more time, I’m gonna kill him.
“What does it matter?” Destiny sighed.
“It just does!” Calum cried, “Those are our girls… and boys. Brad can’t just swoop in and take them!”
“Then don’t let him.” Jess whispered.
“What do you mean?” I asked, “We can’t play without Michael.”
“No, but he’s not dead yet. So you need to stop acting like he is, pull your heads out of your asses and be there for the fans you claim you love so much. They need you guys, they’re hurting too you can’t just forget about them.”
“Once a manager always a manager.” Charlie mumbled.
“Damn right.” Jess sighed, “Now you can lay down and die or you can get your shit together, but you’re going to have to choose fast before the vamps decide for you.”
“I don’t know,” I whispered, “I just…. I don’t even want to do it anymore.”
“Me either.” Calum muttered, “I feel…. Empty…. And dead.”
“Same,” Luke mumbled, “I can’t do it without Mikey.”
“So that’s it?” Charlie asked, “You’re giving up?”
“I guess.” I muttered.
“Then you’re really not the band I thought you were.” Jess whispered, “The 5SOS know wouldn’t let some ass holes squash their dream.”
“What do you want us to do?” Luke demanded.
“I don’t know!” she cried, “What happened to the boys you couldn’t keep down cause they’d always come back again! What about all the nights and dreams and the moments you’ll never get back again! You’ve been, though a thousand heartbreaks, but I still believe in you. Don’t stop, now that you’ve started because, so many people believe in you guys and need you guys and…. And if you throw that away, you’re fucking stupid!”