I just realised I've updated today. But here's another, just because. Please vote to show your appreciation. If the ratio of voters to readers is one in 3.5 I'll update again tomorrow. Promise ♡
Twitter: WordsWithGem
Snapchat: gemma.allan
Instagram: gemma.allan
"Wait," I say aloud, my body language stiffening. "Everything has already been decided. 5 Seconds of Summer are touring with you right?" I say, though I feel like I'm missing something.
"Well nothing is finalised just yet..." Harry mumbles quietly.
"Harry," I say his name through gritted teeth, "Their names are announced. It's even on the tickets. You can't do this to them."
The boys opposite don't really know how to react to the turn in conversation and shift awkwardly in their seats. I don't even care if I'm being rude. This isn't just going to affect Luke, but the entire band. Why should the band suffer as a result of one member's actions?
"I want you to take me home," I say, standing up to grab my bag. "I want to go home now."
Wordlessly he gets up, and shakes hands with each of the boys as they mumble their goodbyes.
"It was nice meeting you," I say without meaning, nodding in their direction before walking ahead of Harry. I let him walk alongside me and try to remain neutral as more shots of us are taken by awaiting paparazzi. More seemed to have gathered since entering The Groucho Club as they surround our car, and I am forced to cover my eyes as the blinding flashes go off.
"How can you think that's even remotely a good idea?" I say once we are on the road and out of sight from the photographer's gaze. "This is what Liam was telling you to back off about," I say, shaking my head in realisation. "How can you be so spiteful Harry?"
"Why?" he repeats, his voice rising with the heat of the moment. "Why am I doing this? I'm being forced to work with someone who claimed to be a mate, and is now trying to fuck you. I am being expected to help out this smug arsehole that everyone is feeling sorry for, and be expected to see him on a daily basis. Do you understand how fucking hard this is for me?" he says, banging on the wheel for emphasis. "No one is fucking thinking how hard it is on me to see him look at you the way that he does. Why are people accepting this bullshit?"
"I –" and I am truly lost for words. I knew he obviously doesn't like being around Luke, but I guess I never really imagined things from his point of view. It devastates me to hear him open up to me this way. That he could be feeling all of these emotions inside, and not be able to open up.
I place my hand over his in the middle console section of the car.
"I love you Harry," I tell him. "I think you do some silly things sometimes, but I'll always love you," I say as we pull up in my driveway.
His bottom lip quivers, and he purses his lips together to stop him from shaking.
"Harry..." I sigh, hating seeing him in this way.
I reach my hand behind his neck, and run my fingers through his curls in what I hope is comforting to him.
I need to make him feel better.
Wordlessly we exit the car and walk inside, with myself leading the way to my bedroom.
Once we are standing at the foot of my bed, I reach out and run my fingers over his jawline, and his eyes glisten with moisture.
"I'm sorry Harry..." I say, kissing him, "I'm so sorry for everything," I say against his mouth. I unbutton his three remaining buttons, and his shirt slips off easily to the floor. He grabs onto the back of my dress, unzipping the material without our lips disconnecting in the process. My dress holds the same fate as his shirt, and I fumble with his jeans until we are standing before one another in our underwear.
"So much for taking things slowly," I smile as his hot wet kisses move to my neck. He kisses me with such emotion behind it, and my head moves back to give him better access.
He pulls me up against his body so that I feel him hard against my lower stomach. My hands wander to his underwear, rubbing over the piece of material with my palm, watching him go from strong and in control, to weak in a matter of seconds.
Pushing him down on the bed so that he is sitting on the edge, I kiss him from my standing position as he holds me in place. Kneeling down, I tug on his underwear and he raises his hips to help make it easier to free him. Without any hesitation I take him in my mouth, swirling my tongue around his length, before sucking hard. He moans out in pleasure as I steadily quicken my pace.
"Ava," he sighs as he clutches onto the back of my hair.
There is something so empowering about having a man crumble at the pure touch of you, and I love seeing him in this state.
He tilts his head back and groans as he flexes his hips so that he's deeper in my mouth. I feel him getting closer as I taste the salty sweetness of his pre come, and feel his member pulsing in my mouth.
I come up for air, and as I do so, he pulls me atop him so that I am now straddling his torso.
"I love you," I remind him, looking him seriously in the eyes.
"No matter what?" he replies.
"No matter what," I confirm, grabbing his erection in my hand and lowering myself onto him. My movements are achingly slow as my body adjusts to his size. Leaning forward, he unclasps my bra with one of his hand, and buries his head into my chest as we move as one. My hands search for something to grasp onto, and almost as if he knows, his hands entwine themselves in mine as we each move ever so closely to our climaxes.
My body feels as if it is overflowing with pleasure and I need my sweet release. His thrusts become more forceful with each motion, and I moan out in intense ecstasy as my body comes undone in ripples. Waves of pleasure ring out through my body and almost immediately after I come, I feel Harry's warm liquid shooting inside me, causing the pressure to build up once more inside me. I cry out in surprise as my body feels the absolute definition of bliss.
"Oh my God what just happened?" I say aloud, collapsing on top of him. My head resting comfortably on his chest as we are laying in a panting mass of intertwined bodies. "My body feels like it's singing."
"I think you had a multiple orgasm," he decides, craning his neck to see me.
"Well thank you for that Harry Edward," I reply, kissing his chest. Beads of sweat cling to his torso, and I'm suddenly aware to the fact that he's still inside me.
"Are you going to stay inside of me forever now?" I smile, peering up at him.
"I'd like nothing more," he smiles fully, exposing his dimples. "But I feel myself getting hard again," he tells me, raising his eyebrows suggestively.
"I'd love to," I reply, kissing him passionately, "But..." I say against his lips.
"But nothing," he finishes, trying to increase the intensity of our kiss.
"I need to get a drink first," I say raising myself off his erection and walking towards the door. I initially have to steady myself as my legs aren't strong enough to hold me, and I hear him chuckling to himself.
"Can I get you anything while I'm down there?" I ask, turning around in the doorway.
"How can I want anything else when I have you. Food and water seem so unnecessary when I have someone like you giving me life."
"That's so cheesy I'm going to vomit all over you," I laugh.
"Hurry back," he asks, his eyes glistening for what he has planned for me.
I walk nude into the kitchen. There is something so freeing about being in the natural state, and I squint as my eyes adjust to the brightness of the refrigerator light.
Taking out the filtered water I pour myself a nice big glass of water and take a sip, immediately feeling more refreshed. I clear some unimportant letters and bills from the countertop, and my eyes fall upon something I thought I had gotten rid of.
Back At It Again?
What a dreadful magazine. How can anyone read such shit when it almost cost me my relationship? I scrunch it up into a ball before opening the bin, but as I do so, something catches my eye.
Flattening the magazine out, I take a closer look at the pictures attached, and in a matter of seconds, my whole world has turned itself upside down.
My body hunches over in shock, and my hands cover my face in total disbelief.
"What's taking you so long?" he grins, and his expression immediately falls when he sees my face. "Babe, what happened?" he asks, and is immediately at my side. I freeze under his touch and move away from him.
He looks down at the magazine and shakes his head. "I thought we were done with this," he says quietly, as if he is so emotionally spent on this recurring topic that seems to rear its ugly head into our lives – and rightfully so apparently.
"Is there anything you'd like to tell me?" I ask calmly, trying not to raise my voice.
He thinks before shaking his head unsurely.
"Nothing at all?" I reiterate.
"Ava, what's this all about?" he questions, sounding concerned.
"What's this about?" I laugh, finding a shirt hanging one of the stool chairs and throwing it on. "When were these pictures taken Harry?"
"I told you..." he answers, shifting uncomfortably. "Months ago. Before I knew you."
"I find that incredibly hard to believe considering that you're wearing a wristband from my event."
And I watch the colour drain from his face.
"Ava, please," he begs, knowing he's gotten himself into more trouble than he can handle.
"Why Harry?" I demand, my voice trembling. "Why did you do this to me? You had every opportunity to tell me and you continuously lied to me."
"I don't know," he replies. "I care about you too much."
"No Harry. You are a selfish arsehole who only cares about your own feelings than anybody else's. Did you ever think how your lies would affect others? Did it ever bother you that I almost lost a friendship of almost seventeen years because you couldn't own up to what you did? Did it even cross your mind, or did you just not give a fuck?"
"I don't know," he says on the verge of crying, pacing before he steps toward me, and I immediately take a step back.
"You don't know?" I repeat. "Fuck you are frustrating. I'm not even as disappointed about the fact that you fucked pure trash, compared to how I feel that it was killing me inside that I went as far as I did with Luke. I had to tell you and now I know why you didn't want to know what I had to say. Because you knew you would be obligated to tell me about what you were up to. You had so many chances to tell, but you went on and made me feel like shit. Like I was the bad guy in all of this. You allowed me to feel that way, and I won't forget that."
"Ava, I'm sorry. You have no idea. I just wanted to keep you. And the longer it went on, the harder it was to tell you. I regret not telling you but I wanted to keep you."
"I'm not a prized toy. I'm a person Harry. You can't keep me trapped in your suffocating grasp forever."
"I felt you slipping away from me... Things weren't the same, and I wanted to get us back to where we were."
"Don't you see Harry? You are the reason we couldn't move on. I knew you were hiding something from me. I knew there was more to it, and I should have listened to my instincts."
"Ava please –"
"Don't bother Harry... it's done. For good."
"I'm not letting this go," he says determined. Ava we've worked so hard to try to make this work. We can get through this."
"Don't you get it Harry? This shouldn't be work. It never used to be, and look where we are now."
He is silent as my words sink in, and he is desperately searching for anything that he can say to keep me.
"How many times?"
He looks at me with knowing eyes, despite my vague question.
"Ava... Don't make me answer that," he says in a low voice.
"How many times?" I repeat more firmly.
"I don't know... six or seven times."
"Six or seven times?" I spit, absolutely incredulous.
"During our break," he quickly adds. "I'm sorry Ava."
I feel physically sick.
"I just can't believe that the answer was sitting in front of me the entire time in plain site, and I refused to let myself see it," I say regretfully, shaking my head. "You honestly fooled me Harry. The frustrating thing about all of this is that we could have been happy if you would have just told me. I could have overlooked that. But the thing I won't overlook is how you basically sat back and almost let one of my friendships disintegrate because you would rather keep me."
"Ava, please. Let's just go upstairs and get some sleep... we can discuss this tomorrow."
Is he serious? The absolute nerve of this boy!
"Don't you think I'm humiliated enough? Do you want me to hate myself even more by being coerced into sleeping with you again? You've made a fool of me publically. I have stood by you, and ignored these rumours flying around; to now find out they are true. Do you have any idea how stupid I feel? That everyone looks at me and thinks, 'well there's the pathetic girl that took him back'."
He reaches out to my arm in hopes of comforting me and I pull away.
"I think I should leave," he states after some time, full of regret. "I wish things could have turned out differently."
I turn away with my back to him, and cross my arms tight against my chest.
"Ava, I need for you to know that I love you more than I've loved anyone. I will always be here when you're ready."
I remain silent and I stay in this position while I hear him packing his things upstairs. I hear him coming downstairs and feel him lingering in the entranceway, deciding whether or not he should say or do anything. But I think we are both extremely aware of the fact that there are no more words left to say. We've said them all.
Author's Note: Ahh! 5.6M reads! Like I can't even comprehend that number. It's insane and I can't thank you enough. I just wanted to add that the ew Sydney thing from my last chapter wasn't meant to be offensive! It is just banter between Sydney and Melbourne (though Melbourne always wins ;) ) Also, I know a lot of you play the Kardashian game by the amount of comments on Soho, but there is a Soho in London too. The places I use in this are real, and Harry is spotted at The Groucho Club too.
Now onto the tough stuff. Harry. Thoughts? I just want to say to the people saying "wahh Ava you're so annoying. He didn't cheat. STFU bitch because he's telling the truth", that you were wrong! So very wrong indeed. Ava should have trusted your instincts, and you should know to trust the instincts of a main character when they feel off about something. Say what you like about Ava, but she was right, and you owe her an apology haha.
The next chapter I'm warning you is extremely dramatic. Like to a whole new level. It will most likely leave you speechless and I'll leave it at that :)
The gif on the side is of Harry trying to hold back his tears. An oldie, but a goodie. It was intended for the scene in the car.
Is there also anyone who hasn't seen the trailer yet? I watched it for the first time in ages and I forgot how much I liked it. Check it out if you haven't, and leave your thoughts!
Favourite comment was from @heyharryx - it was the first comment and it also made me smile that someone thinks about my story even when they're not reading it. Thanks dear for passing on your thoughts :)
Gemma
♡
Twitter: WordsWithGem
Snapchat: gemma.allan
Instagram: gemma.allan
ask.fm/gemmaastylesss