The silence made Dana nervous and she looked around, hoping to find a subject to talk about. Her eyes rested on the flatscreen. "It's been ages ago since I've played on a Playstation."
Juice stood up. "Well, come on then." He grabbed some cushions and threw them in front of the coffee table. "The cords of the consoles are a little short," he explained.
"Thought all that stuff was wireless those days."
"It's an oldie."
She drank up her beer, stood up and sat down on the pillows with her back against the table. Juice sat down next to her. The table was small, and his hip, shoulder and arm touched hers.
It would be a hell of a challenge to focus on the game, she thought, while she watched how Juice returned to the main menu and started a two-player game. He explained what the buttons were for and what she had to do. His words landed very slowly, she was more aware of how his lips moved and of the enthusiasm in his voice.
Deep down she was starting to forgive Chibs for his stupid move.
"I'll just try somethin',' she chuckled when Juice asked her if she understood. "You'll probably win anyway."
"We're a team."
"Oh. Then we'll lose."
He bumped his shoulder against hers. "Hell no. Bet we're a top team."
"Then you better scoot over a foot or two, 'cause you're distracting me."
Dana suppressed a sigh. She was pondering her words for ages or she just blurted them out, there seemed to be no in-between.
He moved a little aside. "Better? I'm a bad loser. I'm even willing to feel the point of the table in my back if that means we'll win."
Dana chuckled softly. "As long as you can drive me back to the clubhouse, I'm fine with it."
"If not, I'll sleep on the couch."
"Bet that's even worse when your back is killing ya."
"Then you sleep on the couch."
She laughed and shook her head. The starting signal sounded and she turned her attention to the screen.
She wasn't very talented. She hit more walls than people, and only after a comment from Juice she discovered she was running in circles. Now and then she looked aside from the corners of her eyes. His eyes flashed from left to right, and he smashed the buttons so frantically that his fingers must be very muscular.
"As long as you're looking at me, we'll never win," he smirked, without taking his eyes off the screen.
"You're my teacher. Where else should I look at?"
"You're shot."
"Oh, shit." She looked forward again. The only thing she was seeing, was a pool of blood. She froze. In a flash, she saw Casper's bloody face. Stop being a baby. This is just a game. She tried to ignore the image, but she suddenly felt sick by realizing what she was doing in a game. She was shooting at people. Like she'd done with Casper. Like Maddox would do with Juice if he ever found out she'd been here.
She tried to push away the thoughts, to play along, to stay strong.
Suddenly Opie's words were inside her head. "But you have to let people know when they're doing things you don't want, Dane. If not, he'll keep this power over ya."
She took a deep breath and pressed the pause button. Juice turned his head aside, giving her a questioning look. She already wanted to say she needed to go to the bathroom, but she decided to be honest.
"Sorry," she mumbled. "I got a flashback of Casper. Ya know... the guy I killed."
Juice cursed. "Oh shit. I'm such an idiot. Haven't thought about that for a minute..."
"Neither did I," she said quickly. She sighed.
Juice looked at her, his brown eyes worried. "You okay?"
She shrugged, raking a hand through her hair. She hesitated a moment before she asked: "Have you ever shot someone?"
She thought about the gun that had been at the table, the night that he was guarding the clubhouse after her arrival. She knew for sure there was now a weapon around too, maybe even behind his waistband.
He lowered the console and turned to the side, so he could look at her. He leaned with his elbow at the table. "Yea, I did. But never a kill shot." A grim expression appeared on his face. "But I swear I will kill that asshole if he ever shows up."
Dana felt a lump in her throat and resisted the tears that were filling her eyes. She refused to cry again. Instead, she kept silent and did something that would surely distract her attention from her tears. She touched him. She placed her elbow on the table too and she traced her fingers up to his lower arm. They followed the lines of the reaper tattoo.
As soon as she felt his warm skin, she could only think of him, just as she'd hoped. Her breathing faltered when a pleasant tension suddenly caught her. He lowered his arm, stretched it. She felt his eyes upon her face, but she refused to look back. Her fingers reached his wrist, the palm of his hand. Then their fingers entwined.
Finally, Dana looked up to him. "Juice... How can a sweet guy like you still be single?"
When he smiled she pulled her hand away from his and moved it to his face. Her thumb brushed his lower lip. She really didn't get it.
"Maybe I was just waiting for the right girl." He kissed her fingertips. "Someone like you."
Goosebumps spread across her arms, her whole body.
She closed her eyes for a moment. A tear slipped between her eyelashes. She knew she had to stop this, no matter how badly she wanted to get on his lap and kiss him.
"I'm not the right girl," she whispered. "I'm not ready for that."
Speaking out that lie made her heart suffer as if she was poisoning herself. He was exactly what she needed, just as badly as she needed oxygen. But she was scared as hell, she didn't want to expose him to that horrible danger.
"Hey... That's all right." With his thumb, he swept away the tear from her cheek. "I'm not goin' anywhere."
Dana laid her head against his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around her and kissed her temple. Then he connected his phone to the TV and put on some music. The fingers of his right hand found hers again and leaning against each other they listened to the music, while Dana was fully aware of his left hand on her shoulder, the right one in her own hand and his head against hers.