'They say that for everyone in this world, God has made someone or the other,
You meeting me is a sign, believe me,
I am made for someone like you,
Some contact is there with you,
Some relation is there with you,
How should I know, what do I know?
You are my partner so why should I worry?
This is the reason to live and I will die for this.'- Anonymous.
--
Chapter Thirty One
We get into Zayn’s car as he offers us a lift back to our hotel. Even though I am already in debt of him, he doesn’t listen to anything I say and literally forces us to sit in his car. Peter yawns once every two minutes and I can’t help but thank him every time I get a chance. Liam’s remains quiet all the time and I just keep on wondering what he has to say to me. He avoids looking at me till we get to the car while I just keep staring at me every second.
His hands are totally busted and the blood on them has dried up a bit. He swipes the corner of his mouth, which had a streamline of blood, with the back of his hand and winces slightly when it comes in contact with his knuckles. I still can’t digest the fact that he alone fought against three people. I shouldn’t be surprised as much as I am since I’ve been seeing this behavior of his since the time our trip started. Liam doesn’t really need a reason to fight and I can assure that he practically jumps at the idea of beating someone just for fun. But at this particular moment, I can say that he does have a reason. It won’t be a concrete or a solid reason to just go and punch the senses out of someone but there has to be something.
The thing which worries me is his addiction towards drinking. He literally drinks everyday but just because I don’t really have a taste toward drinking, I won’t stop someone doing just that. But Liam gets uncontrollable, discourteous even when he drinks and it drives me insane. Just when I thought I was convinced of tolerating him just because he is my husband, I was proved wrong. I still can’t believe that I was ready to bail him out even at four in the morning. All I can remember is that I wanted to see him safe, that’s all. Even though he was rude and he humiliated me just yesterday, I couldn’t help but rush for him. Everything for him, only him. What for?
My eyes shift towards Liam and I see him stumble on his own way. He pauses for one second but continues walking anyway. After a few seconds he stumbles again and I rush and stand to his side, my hand strongly gripping his upper arm. He gives me a disapproving look but I look away, ignoring him.
“I can manage myself.” He says, his voice low maybe because he doesn’t want Zayn to listen since he walks just a few steps ahead.
“I can see that.” I remark quietly and try to suppress my smirk. I want to turn around to smirk right in front of his face, like he always does, but I decide against it.
We reach Zayn’s car and he presses a small button on the key in his hand, opening up the doors for us. He sits on the driver’s seat and Peter sits next to him. Liam and I hop behind in the passenger’s seat after I thank Zayn again, Liam behind Zayn and I sit behind Peter. Within a few seconds, Zayn starts the car and we leave the police headquarters.
“That was crazy.” Zayn chuckles quietly and Liam tenses next to me. We are just a few feet away from each other and for no reason, I can feel the heat radiating off his body. I feel like scooping myself near him, as near as possible since I’m really, really relieved to see him safe and alright but I know it will catch him off guard and I don’t want to reveal my excitement and more over relief.
“You’re lucky that Traz was a good friend of mine.” Peter says to Zayn. I can hint the amount of sleep which is traced in his voice and I feel incredibly guilty for waking him up.
“Your good friend?” Zayn snorts, “More like my old companion.” He looks at Peter and then me followed by the road. “You know Tiara, just a year or two back, a guy, Thomas, was arrested because he was found drunk driving. I was with him in the same car, he wouldn’t allow me to drive and since he was heavily intoxicated, he wasn’t in the condition to listen to me even. A few cops caught him driving and turns out, he was Traz’s son. He was left easily because he was the inspector’s son but since that day, I easily use this against him as a reminder if I’m caught.” He still chuckles at the memory and I smile, even though I know he can’t see me.
“I’m so proud of you.” Peter remarks sarcastically, on the verge of sleeping in the car. Within minutes, I hear him snoring, a bit too loudly.
“I didn’t catch your name. What was it, Zack?” Liam says suddenly, concentrating outside the window. Even though it is already dark inside, and the small light in the car isn’t helping a bit I can see his hand tightly pressed against it. I have to cure his bruises.
“Zack?” Zayn laughs quietly, “its Zayn. Zayn Malik.” The heaviness of his British accent is easily recognizable in his voice and no one can deny the fact he is handsome, too. I just met him a few hours ago and he has helped me more than one time, already.
“Both of you met in Hampstead?” he asks, looking at me. Now he wants to look at me when I have no answer?
“No, of course not! That’s just a reason I cooked to feed him. I met Tiara at Peter’s wine shop just the last evening.” He says easily.
No! I really don’t want Liam to know how and why. There’s nothing wrong to know or even bad, but I have a feeling it won’t be good for Zayn considering the violent schemes of Liam.
“What were you doing at a wine shop?” Liam asks me directly, the confusion and repulsion clear in them. His voice isn’t low and I can say he doesn’t care if Zayn listens or not, which I know he is listening.
“I, umm, I just wanted to try some wine, I guess.” After I say the reason, I realize how stupid and immature that sounds. After the fight in the morning, I ran away from him and now he hears that I was buying wine. This sounds incredibly juvenile.
“I thought you didn’t drink.” He says softly.
“I don’t. I just wanted to try some, like I said.” I don’t even understand why I am even explaining myself to him. He ignores me cleanly.
“So Zayn, Tiara and you met here?” He asks and I can say that his interest level is at the utmost peak level.
“Yeah, I sort off walked her back to the hotel since she was lost.” The humor in his voice is lost and he measures the words considerably. I guess I could have told him myself because I just don’t want Zayn to tell this to him. I take a deep breath and look out of the window. This ride is taking longer than usual. I’m not sure how Liam will take this piece of information.
“Tiara was lost? Oh.” Liam looks deep in his thoughts and I just want to dive out of this car, it’s getting highly suffocating, “Anyway, what do you do in Hampstead?” Liam asks Zayn and I know that he has let go of this topic, thankfully. I’m completely aware that he will ask me again and I will have to figure out something.
Zayn launches himself into a full conversation with Liam about his future endeavors in London. He tells him he is still meeting a few music producers since he wants to start his own company. I can make out the excitement and warmth flooded in his voice as he tells us about his progress. I find myself listening intently to him but then I notice Liam staring out of the window. For a second, I think he isn’t interested as usual but then he advises something to Zayn, completely relevant to the topic. I smile at Liam that he at least is talking to someone since we’ve got here. Liam’s voice is businesslike, as if he is advising something to one of his employees but I don’t find myself complaining. He is talking, if not anything.
I still don’t know whether we will talk or not tonight, well, morning. Liam looks bruised more than tired or exhausted and I really want to know what happened. I have a feeling he won’t be telling me and I can’t think of anything to remove the information from him. I got him bailed him in the morning at four; I deserve to know the reason at least.
Zayn stops the car and I look out. We are parked in front of our hotel. Liam gets out of the car followed by Zayn and me. I walk towards the other side where Zayn and Liam stand for me.
“Thanks a lot, Zayn. I don’t know how I will ever repay you.” I tell him sincerely and he shows me his perfect smile, his tongue pushes against the back of his teeth, giving a mischievous look.
“You really don’t have to, Tiara. I will have to drop you back if you repeat that again.” He warns me and I giggle softly.
“It’s too late, or too early I guess. We should be going. I wanted to thank Peter but its better if I don’t wake him up.” I look over to a sleeping Peter and back to Zayn. I figure Liam is now standing a bit near to me than he was before. Within seconds, Liam’s wraps his hand around my shoulders, pulling me near. My eyes widen as I’m caught off guard. I dash sideways to his chest but he steadies me.
“Zack, thanks man. That was really nice of you.”Liam says. His voice is flat.
“It’s Zayn. That’s no issue, Liam. Well, you can contact me if you guys plan on hanging out, or something. Tiara has my number.” He says and I really want Zayn to stop speaking.
The grip of Liam’s hand on my shoulders tighten and I scowl at him. I push him a little by my shoulder and wiggle out of his hold.
After a few goodbyes and thank you’s, Zayn gets inside the car and leaves. Liam and I turn around to get in the hotel. We pass the reception in silence, both of us not making any attempt to talk. I grab a medical kit on my way from the reception from the old bald man and walk behind Liam. He doesn’t even turn to see if I’m there or not.
“Why do you have his number?” Liam asks abruptly and somewhere I expected him to ask this.
“How does it bother you? You can go drink how much ever you want.” I spit. Amidst everything, I am really pissed at him for drinking and reacting to things while intoxicated. I was just too blinded by the thought of seeing him safe that I forgot what he was really drinking.
“It does bother me! Why do you have some guy’s number who you met just a few hours back?” he spits back. Surprisingly, his voice is steady, as if he doesn’t want to start fighting.
“He just gave it to me if I ever needed some help. You don’t have to make an issue out of everything. I’m angry at you already.” I insert the key into the keyhole and the door creaks open. We both enter our room and Liam closes it shut behind him.
“You shouldn’t trust someone this easily. What if he was… someone wrong?” I know what he was going to say. I sit the medical kit on the table, slipping my feet out of the hideous heels.
“If he was someone wrong, then he wouldn’t save me from Mack.” I say and bit my tongue instantly. Why did I say that? I didn’t plan on saying that at all.
“Mack? Who is he? Wait, what did he do?” the aggression in his voice is evident. I turn around away from him. Instantly, his hands press against my wrist turning me around in a jiffy.
“Nothing, nothing.” I cringe at his hurtful hold. He notices my discomfort and lets go immediately.
“Tell me.” He presses.
“Just another drunkard at that liquor shop. He sort off, was foul mouthed.” The memory of Mack is disgusting enough and I don’t even want to remember it anymore.
“Motherfucker…” He starts.
“You don’t have to overreact! I told you, Zayn got him away in time. Will you please stop acting so instantaneously? I’m tired already.” I sigh in exhaustion and sit on the edge of the bed. He looks at me and his face softens. He takes his place next to me, keeping a safe distance between us.
“Is there anything else you are hiding?” He asks me and my mouth hangs open.
“If there is anyone who is hiding then it’s you. You told me that you would tell me everything once we reach the hotel. Don’t break your promise.” I silently plead him. Even though I’m angry at him for everything, from beating three random guys to blaming Zayn again for no reason, somewhere deep down I want to know what happened. If he won’t tell me, I will storm out of here, I know that. It’s past six now and I can see the sun rising, illuminating the small room. Liam’s face remains guarded and the energy between us has shifted again.
“I didn’t promise anything. You really don’t have to know. It’s just…crap.” He mutters disapprovingly, which only makes me want to know whatever it is more.
“Liam, I just got you bailed out for a volatile behavior and you are telling me that there is nothing to know about? You are a terrible liar.” I cross my hands and stare at him passively. He looks at his hands again and his face is… fallen? I don’t trust myself when I see him like this.
“It’s just that… after whatever I said in the morning… I am sorry. I didn’t mean it. I told you, I say things I don’t mean at all.” His remain red and he looks at me with so much fear that it scares the hell out of me, too. I feel my chest rise and fall and I know my breathing hitches when he is around. I didn’t expect him to apologize to me at all and now that he has, I don’t know what to say or do.
“Both of us know we have a lot to talk about everything. We cannot just wait for someone to say something unkind only to ruin something which is already fragile.
“I’m not really good at talking.” He whispers which is almost inaudible.
“I have figured that out by now but we can’t be functioning that way, both of us.” I wait for him to answer but he remains quiet.
“What were you doing in the club, in the first place?” I try my chance and ask him again. Instead, he stares at nowhere in particular and every part of me which is trying its best to convince him is giving up by now. I cannot force him if he himself doesn’t trust me enough to share whatever it is that is bothering him. I wait for him to say something, anything but he remains guarded as ever. I stand to my feet to leave the room only for a walk. I don’t care if its only six in the morning or that the sun has risen up entirely, I feel a loose end break inside me. The only hope is shattered. We cannot be working if the other one doesn’t participate in our differences at all.
“I think I’ll go out for a while, solve the conflict I’m having with myself. You should sleep, you haven’t got any. I’ll medicate these knuckles while you’re asleep or after you get up, whatever.” I ramble unintentionally and slip my legs into my heels again. He doesn’t even look up to me and I feel like crying. In fact the tears are brimming again, I hate being this weak. Before I walk outside the door I look at him. He stays in the position as before. I take this as a cue and hold the door handle.
“After you left in the morning,” He says unexpectedly, making me stop in my tracks, “I was more than pissed off and angry. I don’t know who I was angry at, you or me. Nevertheless, I was angry. I stepped into the living room and broke everything I could see in this bullshit. Cups, vases, everything.” I did not expect him to say anything, even though I hoped, so when he really does I stay rooted to my spot as I watch his heaving back intently.
“I didn’t want to stay here and I didn’t know where you vanished. I started feeling guilty when I thought I shouldn’t but still, I did. So I left to search for you.” His words unravel me. He came to search for me?
“But I couldn’t find you,” He continues, “And I didn’t know where the fuck you were walking anyway. I needed a drink or two so I stopped for some bar, the only one I could find. I can’t recollect where.” He turns around to look at me.
“I thought you left.” He says softly.
“I’m right here.” My words mean more than I intend them to sound.
“I was already down a few glasses when some heavily drunk guys started fucking around with me. They were some guys who saw me beat Roger the other day so I guess that they just came to prove some point to me as they were in a majority. Call it a shitfull coincidence but that’s that.” He says and avoids looking at me. He plays with his fingers and taps his feet against the floor. He is nervous, I can tell.
“That’s it? Liam, I think you are hiding something. What did they tell you which blew your anger within seconds?” I ask him.
“There is nothing more to know…”
“Tell me or I leave.” I turn around to walk towards the door again when he stops talking, again.
“They were speaking stuff about you! They saw you leaving with me, so they were just… talking about how beautiful your bod… about you in general. I punched every single one of them because they wouldn’t stop. The guy who broke his nose started it. Don’t leave, please.” He begs that it becomes difficult for me to gulp. I know that he is a bit intoxicated so he won’t lie to me. He looks so sincere and crestfallen that it breaks my heart, too much. He fought a majority alone and got arrested for that without complaining. Who is this man who just humiliated me?
“What is wrong with you? Why would you do that?! You were alone and they were three for god’s sake! What is something happened to you?” I take a long step towards him. Even though I can’t ignore the lightening and jolts I feel in my chest right now, my worry and protection for him overtakes it. I take a seat next to him as he buries his face in his bloody hands in irritation.
“And let them walk away easily? Why are you even worrying about me in the first place; I thought you hated me.”
“I slapped you because you deserved to! That doesn’t mean I hate you. Will you please get out of the notion that everyone hates you!” I increase my voice. The thought of him getting into a brawl against anyone, even if it was for me, doesn’t settle well with me.
“I don’t let myself believe in stupid assumptions. I know it is true.” He says. What even?
“That’s ridiculous.” I say and get up to take the first aid kit. His eyes widen when he sees me get up but he looks away when he notices that I got up just to take the kit. I remove a piece of the cotton bud and apply a small portion of the half used antiseptic from the kit. I take his hand in mine and start cleaning the dried blood. He tenses his hand under mine in agony but doesn’t say anything.
“I have been warning you time and again that you will get arrested for something like this. Why were you so cold about it all the time? Aren’t you worried at all about yourself?” I ask him. I feel like straddling him and shouting ‘I told you!’ a million times but decide against it.
“I’m not scared of getting arrested at all. It isn’t my first time though.” He says it casually.
“What?” I snap.
“Nothing.”
“Liam, you need to stop with the ‘nothing’ stuff. I told you, it isn’t helping us.”
“You are really nosey,” he complains, “I have been arrested before.” I look at him, shocked.
“You will ask me why, spare me. Once I was caught in a rave party by some cops who raided that place. All of us were arrested; I was twenty-twenty one back then. We called our family to bail us out. Two to three days passed by but no one came to bail me out. I was locked up for a few weeks till my case went to the court.” He looks at nowhere in particular. I can’t digest the new piece of information which is thrown in my way. I pause but continue cleaning his hand anyway.
“I called dad but then I later realized that he wasn’t in town at all. Josh was with him, too. They couldn’t help it, nor could I. Otherwise someone would have come for me, I’m sure.” He says to me but for some reason, I think he says that to convince himself. Today, I got to see a completely different side of Liam. With this, I think I can understand him more, be it merely by one percent. I’m not complaining, I’m glad he is talking but I can’t help but think about a lost guy, standing behind the bars waiting for someone to come and bail him out.
“Is that why you didn’t want to talk to me when Traz called me?”
“Because I didn’t want to bother you. I didn’t even know where you would be in the first place. So I told them not to call anyone since there was no one. They figured I was on my honeymoon so hence I was forced to give my number, the only hope which was left since your phone hardly gets any network.” I force back my smirk. He does know.
“I told you I would come.” I stop cleaning the wounds of his hand and take another cotton plug. I apply antiseptic and move it towards his bright pink lips. The corner of his lip is busted and I slowly start cleaning it, ignoring his burning gaze.
“I thought you wouldn’t come, just like my dad or Josh.” He says so silently that I can hardly hear. It is so contrast for him, he is shouting one second while literally whispering the other.
“You were wrong.” I smirk finally.
“Guess I was.”
“You know we still have a lot to talk about, right?” I ask him after a dead silence.
“Can we save some for tomorrow? Being that inquisitive creature that you are, must be difficult. I desperately need some sleep.” He rubs his eyes with his now clean hands. I use my other hand to cup his cheeks to keep him steady. I start cleaning the last traces of blood left on his handsome face.
“I thought you didn’t drink.” He mutters.
“I thought you didn’t fight on a daily basis. Both of us lied somewhere.” He smirks but winces instantly.
I dispose off the cotton plugs after using them and clean my hands. By the time I come back, Liam throws his shirt away and dives under the duvet. He has closed the balcony door and there is hardly any light coming in the room.
“Sleep next to me?” he demands quietly, and my heart undergoes a somersault. The energy shift between us is insane but I think I’m getting used to it. There is a nagging thought behind my mind that he is this honest just because he is still intoxicated and he won’t be the same again after we wake up. But I know that I don’t want to be anywhere else at all and this moment belong to me and only me. I ignore all the burning acids his mouth threw at me last morning and slip under the duvet next to him. His hands go over my waist, pulling me close to him.
“Don’t leave, please.” Before I can answer, I hear him snoring lightly against my neck.
--