Lennon's hands were shaking, as she stared down at her phone. I knew something was wrong, but I didn't want to jump to conclusions.
"Who's that texting you?" I asked as I peered over her shoulder. The contact read Unknown Number. "Unknown number?"
She gulped, leaning over her phone. "Bradley..." She whispered.
I took her phone from her hands and read over the message. It better be a wrong number, I thought to myself, but I was wrong. The text was nasty and I couldn't help but feel responsible. I provoked him, I made him angry and now he was taking it out on Lennon.
I hope your going to the dance. You know what they say happens after dances. Lots of girls lose it that night but you won't be, will you, because you already lost it. Maybe you will get round 2. ;)
He was taunting her with his words, threatening he'd do it again. I couldn't get so angry as I did last time. Lennon trusted me to be there for her and I wasn't going to jeopardize her trust. I put her phone down on the table and put my anger aside. This was a lot harder for her than it was for me. Lennon had her head in her hands and a terrified look was plastered on her face.
I tried to rub her back but she flinched away. "Lennon..." I muttered, searching her eyes. I reached for her hand instead, trying my best to comfort her.
"He won't leave me alone..." She whispered, breathing heavily. "He's just going to keep harassing me, it's not going to stop. I'm never going to be able to get away from him." She shook her head quickly, her eyes were pooling with tears.
"It's going to be alright." I rubbed her back, but it wasn't looking like it was helping.
"What if he... I can't go through it again... Oh god..." She put her hand on her chest, gasping for air.
She's having a panic attack, I thought. I didn't know how to help her.
"Lennon I won't let that happen." I told her, but it was like she didn't hear me.
"I- I can't breathe." She panicked and I took hold of her shoulders.
"Just look at me, follow my breathing." I tried to show her, breathing in and out dramatically but my efforts to help her were quickly failing.
"Let- Let go of me!" She screamed at me, backing herself as far away from me on the couch as she could get.
"What? Lennon, what's wrong?" I tried again. Something was off.
"No, no Bradley, don't hurt me." She clenched her eyes shut.
"Hey, it's me." I moved towards her and wrapped my arms around her. Just hold her, make her feel better, I told myself. Her hands beated against my chest.
"Get off, get off." She squirmed in my grasp.
"It's okay, Lennon." Her foot connected with my stomach and I groaned in pain.
"No! No! Stop!" She kept screaming. She was reliving it and tears were streaming down her face. I had to show her it was me, but this time I kept my distance.
"Lennon, it's Rowan. I'm not going to hurt you, I'd never let anyone hurt you. Bradley isn't here, you're home and you're safe. I promise." I tried to just keep talking. "I'm here, I'm here for you. Just please see me Lennon. Just take deep breaths, concentrate on your breathing. I'm right here. You're safe."
Her eyes opened and I watched her chest rise and fall, as she came to the realization of where she was.
"Lennon..." I muttered.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." She threw herself into my arms, holding onto me tightly. "Rowan, I'm sorry."
"It's okay Lennon. I won't let him hurt you ever again." I rubbed her back, drawing circles with my fingers. "Promise."
"Is everything okay down here? I heard screaming!" Raven ran down the stairs and looked right at Lennon's tear stained face. I knew what she thought. She thought I hurt her.
"Everything's okay." I answered when Lennon didn't, but Raven didn't believe me. She wanted to hear it from Lennon. She gave me the stink eye.
"Lennon? Did he hurt you?" She asked, folding her arms across her chest. Lennon looked up at me and smiled.
"No, he'd never hurt me. It's okay Raven." She said. Her voice was raspy and hoarse from crying. Raven sighed and nodded, retreating back up the stairs.
We fell into silence after Raven left. My arms were still around Lennon and her head was still resting against my chest. I couldn't get the text off my mind, I didn't know how to handle it, I just knew I didn't want Lennon worrying about it. She didn't need that on top of everything else.
"What if we take this to the police Lennon?" I asked. It would support her case, it was a threat. The police would see that. She just shook her head. "Lennon..."
"I don't know Rowan..." She muttered. "What if they don't believe me? That'll just make Bradley angrier." I sighed. I could see where she was coming from.
"This is proof Lennon. The police should see that." I tried but she just stayed silent. "Just think about it?"
"Okay, I'll think about it." She nodded.
"Okay, that's all I can ask." I sighed and kissed her forehead. "Try not to worry about the text, I'll take care of it." A worried look came onto her face and I knew why. "I won't do anything stupid."
"That's what you said last time..." She mumbled.
"I know... I won't do anything. I learned my lesson." I promised her, but I knew I had to say it outloud. "Okay, I pinkie swear." I held out my pinkie and she wrapped hers around mine.
"Okay, but this is the promise of all promises so you better not break it." She threatened with a laugh.
"I won't Lennon." I reached forward and wiped the tears from her cheeks with my thumb.
"Why is he doing this?" She asked me. I'd wonder the same thing. Why people thought it was okay to hurt someone. Why people died. Why anything happened. I gave up on trying to find the answers. I wasn't even sure there were any.
"I don't know, he's a sick sadistic bastard. You don't deserve to go through any of this." I told her honestly. It was what I believed. "No one does."
"Yeah..." She played with her thumbs on her lab.
"Do you want to keep watching?" I asked her, gesturing towards the TV.
"I don't really feel like it." She muttered.
"Okay, we can do something else." I suggested, but she shook her head. I furrowed my eyebrows, confused.
"Can I just sleep? I feel so drained..." Lennon bit her lip, nervously.
"Yeah sure. I'll go." I went to get up but she grabbed onto my hand.
"Stay. Please." She pulled me back down onto the couch.
"Okay." I laid back and she laid down with her head on my chest and her legs sprawled out across me. I was happy she felt so comfortable around me but I hated seeing her like this. I could tell she was hurting and there was nothing I could do to make it better, except be there for her. I wanted to do more. "Go to sleep."
"Umhm." She muttered, her eyes were already closed.
I just watched her sleep, running my hands through her hair. I hadn't realized how long it was. I took a deep breath, thinking about how to find a way to find closer for her, so she could put what happened with Bradley behind her. I truly felt like the only way for her to find that was for her to send him to jail for the rest of his life. So she would know that she was safe.
"Rowan?" I heard my name and my eyes snapped toward the hallway. Raven was standing there. "Can I ask you something?"
"Um, yeah, sure." I muttered. I had no idea what I had got myself into.
"What's going on with Lennon?" She asked and I gulped. I was in the middle of the relationship between two sisters and I didn't like it.
"I'm sorry, that's not for me to say." I told her, hoping it would be enough.
"So there is something going on with her though..." She deducted. Shit. I knew I said too much. "I know, I know, you can't tell me." I shook my head. "But is she okay?"
"She will be, I'll make sure of it." I looked down at Lennon, still fast asleep.
"Is it bad?" She asked. I just sighed. "Right, you can't tell me that either." I could see the frustration on her face.
"She'll tell you when she's ready, just be patient." I couldn't say anymore. I didn't want to betray Lennon. This was her sister. She had to tell her when she was ready.
"Okay, fine."
--
I needed an outlet, a way to let my anger go, for Lennon because all I could think about was how much Bradley had hurt her and how badly I wanted him to pay. I couldn't just sit around and do nothing but I had to, because Lennon asked me to. So I had to find another way, to let go.
I loaded my surfboard into my car and shimmied into my wet suit. I hadn't been surfing since my accident, but I didn't think anything of it. I'd just been preoccupied with everything that was going on. I went to the closest beach and took my time putting wax on my board. The waves were huge.
I wiped my sweaty palms on my pant legs and pulled up the zipper of my wet suit. The water felt cold against my toes compared to the warm air. I let my board float next to me as I held onto the tip, pulling it over the waves. My heart was pounding in my chest. I shook my head and kept going. I jumped onto my board and started to paddle.
I counted the strokes in my head, keeping my mind preoccupied. It took away the nerves. It wasn't long before I was quite a ways out, waiting for the waves to come. I wasn't going to be choosy, I just needed to ride one, feel the adrenaline and let my mind be free.
One came barreling down the horizon and I spun myself around, ready. Suddenly the nerves were back. I wondered if I should have turned back, not risk getting hurt again. But I looked around, there were no rocks around me. I was safe.
I felt the power beneath my board and paddled into the wave. I gripped onto the rails and stood up, but my feet slipped out from under me, sending me plummeting into the water. My body did circles as the wave crashed before I finally resurfaced. I was rattled, scared and I didn't want to do it again.
I hopped onto my board and paddled back into shore, thinking I would try again next time. I felt an ache in my stomach. I wanted to love surfing but instead I was terrified to go back out into the water.
I just sat in the sand and thought about Lennon. At least I wasn't as angry anymore, it was still there in the back of my mind, ready for when I needed it. Part of me hoped I would never need it, while the other part of me hoped I would.
I drew a heart in the sand and wrote subconsciously in the middle of it.
R + L
Hey guys we hope you liked this chapter. Some big things will be happening in the next chapter!
What do you think Bradley wants? Should Rowan tell Raven?