♡Brendon♡
After a few hours of being angry in my room, I obviously realize that I was being an ass.
He had every right to be angry.
I slowly leave my room and walk down the hall to Dallon's.
I take a deep breath as I push the white wooden door open to see him sitting in bed on his laptop.
"Whatcha doin?" I ask. I'm just going to act like we didn't fight. Maybe he will too.
"Looking at rehab centers." He answers absent mindedly and my heart drops.
I can't go to rehab. I'm not like those people.
"Dal... I'm sorry but I can't go to rehab." I tell him and he finally looks at me.
"Why not? You need help." He says before going back to looking at the different hell holes.
"I just need a few more days and I'll be the same as I was before." I say and he rolls his eyes.
"That's what I thought before going to rehab for four months and you will probably never be the same Brendon." He says bluntly.
My eyes widen when I hear he was there for four months.
"You haven't changed though." I say and he looks at me again.
"You don't know me. I don't look forward to most things anymore, I'm quiet and shy with my closest friends and and my anxiety is ten times worse than it was in high school so don't tell me I haven't changed." He says calmly. I can tell that he's slowly losing his patience.
It sounds like he went through hell and back.
"If the rehab changed you that much, why do you want to put me through that?" I ask, slowly losing my patience as well.
"It was the drugs that changed me, not the rehab Brendon! I feel bad enough about not being able to help you myself so just let me do this for you!" He yells before we stare at each other in disbelief.
Dallon hates yelling. It's always a surprise when he actually does yell.
"I'm sorry." He mutters quietly as he looks down to his lap.
"Don't be. I do need help." I say. I obviously don't mean it but I don't want Dallon to have that sad look on his face anymore.
"Will you go to rehab?" He asks and I squeeze my eyes shut at the thought.
"Please, for me." He says and I open my eyes to see tears slowly rolling down his cheeks.
"Okay." I say.
How hard can rehab be?
If somebody put a bag of cocaine in front of me right now, I wouldn't touch it because I'm not addicted anymore.
I'm still going through withdrawals, but I'm not addicted.
I wish Dallon could see that.
Maybe I am still addicted though. I did go to Lindsey today.
I just don't see the problem with how I'm living. It did push Spencer away and ruined my marriage but there's good parts to it as well.
I will always love the rush coke gives me. It's quick and easy. Dallon is not quick and easy.
He makes me feel better than the coke does but he's not there all the time.
He got me into a rehab rather quickly though. A nice one too.
I leave tomorrow.
He told me that that's where he went and it helped him a lot. He said that the staff are all really nice and that they will always make sure I'm comfortable.
If Dallon could do it I can too. He didn't get back into drugs after it though and I know I will.
"We'll pack your things in the morning. Lets just lay together right now." Dallon says as he snuggles further into my chest.
I just kiss the top of his head.
I hate lying to him. He thinks I'm going to get better. I really tried for him but I'm tired. I want to go back to partying every day feeling the rush that coke gives me.
I'm pulled out of my thoughts as Dallon somehow snuggles even further into my chest.
Just looking at him makes me realize how tired I actually am.
I close my eyes and let sleep take me and try my best to not think about everything that could happen tomorrow.
***
"Wake up Bren." Dallon says quietly as he runs his fingers through my hair.
"What time is it?" I mumble.
"It's nine right now and we have to be at the center for noon." He tells me before leaving the room.
I immediately wake up as soon as he mentions that stupid rehab center.
I really don't want to go but Dallon will be happy and that's all I really want.
I get up and slowly make my way to the kitchen and I see Dallon standing over the stove humming lightly while making breakfast.
It's going to suck when he realizes that I'm not going to give up the cocaine, even with the rehab.
Hopefully he can look past the addiction and stay with me.
I never want to quit coke.
Dallon turns around and smiles at me.
"I know you're probably nervous, but I might be able to help you take your mind off things for a little bit." He says seductively and I lick my lips.
I walk over to him and begin to kiss his neck but I'm stopped.
"Not until after breakfast." He tells me with a mischievous smile.
What a fucking tease.
I roll my eyes slightly but he just kisses my cheek and starts to fill our plates with his delicious cooking.
We sit down at the table in the dining room and begin to eat.
I try to eat as fast as I can but Dallon is definitely taking his sweet time.
I'm about five seconds away from flipping the table and having sex with him right here.
I start to slowly sip at my coffee as he happily munches away at a piece of toast.
I look to the clock to see that it's only ten and we still have two hours to pack and do... other things.
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1:18am
This chapter legit took me three weeks to write.
I've been listening to Two by Twenty One Pilots on repeat for a lil while and I'll write smut in the next chapter.
♡A story from my rant book♡
So,,,,, once upon a time, I was trying to do my makeup (this was a few months ago)
It was a simple as heck look and I decided to use eyeshadow that I got a lil while ago.
So I did my eyebrows and put on concealer and highlighted under my eyebrow with white eyeshadow.
I used a different eyeshadow for the rest of my eye and then used the eyeliner that I use all the time.
Sooooooo I go to wash it off and ThE skIN uNdER mY EYeBrOw cOmES oFf WiTh iT.
This is the second chemical burn I've had this month.
I am not a happy camper.
I told my mom about it and we were listening to Cemetery Drive in the mcdonalds drive through and she turns and looks at me before saying:
"My Chemical Romance, more like My Chemical Burn!"
I had a heart attack.
I am deceased.
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