Audrey
"Ladies and gentlemen," the pilot called over the intercom. "Please fasten your seatbelts, open your window shades, and store your trays in the upright position. We will be landing very shortly. It is currently 6pm in Seoul. The weather is slightly cloudy with a comfy 23 degrees. I hope you enjoyed your flight with Korean Air."
I readjusted my seat into a sitting position and pulled up the window shade, glancing out at the looming city beneath me. Hundreds of lights illuminated the sky below. A smile slipped on my face. I had seen this landscape in a number of TV shows, yet only dreamed of this moment. Now here I was. I was so excited that every drama and worry from the last few months were forgotten. All I could think about was the new food, different culture, people I would meet, and things I'd learn. This was going to be good for me. I could feel it. It was time to start again.
The plane came to a land, barely bouncing on the ash top. Eventually everyone was standing in the hallways, eager to get off. I decided to wait patiently. There was no rush for me to get off and I didn't like the idea of trying to squeeze through the mass of people.
When the hallway had cleared slightly, I got out of my seat and shuffled out, grabbing my hand luggage from the top and heading out. I had never been overseas before so I had no clue what to do. From what I had been briefed on by my parents, I had get my bag and then find customs where I would show my passport.
As I exited the terminal, locating the baggage area was quite easy. It was not far from the gate. I watched the conveyor belts move around. People grabbed their bags and left. The crowd began to disperse, and I still stood there five minutes later, watching three bags go around. Where was mine? I looked up and starting glancing around. Did someone take mine? Did they lose it? How could they lose my luggage? It was one plane! I thought these things only happened in movies. What do I do if I lost my luggage? I could feel my breath quicken. I needed to find my bag. This couldn't happen to me. What would I wear? I don't have enough money to buy new clothes.
Suddenly a guy walking in the distance caught my attention. A familiar sticker and tag attached to a black suitcase caught my attention.
"Hey! You!" I called out as I started running. I could not tell the nationality of the person from behind. "Jeogiyo!" I tried in Korean.
The person turned around and stared at me. He wasn't Korean.
"Do you speak English?" I asked.
He raised an eyebrow.
"Hangukeo?" I tried.
He shook his head.
"Francais?"
Nope.
"Italiano?"
Nope.
"Deutsch?"
He didn't shake his head.
"Sprechen sie Deutsch?"
"Ja."
"Shit. I don't," I mumbled to myself. "Um... Gepäck," I said, pointing at the suitcase. "Mein." I pointed at myself.
"Deine?"
I had no clue what he said, but he was pointed at me so I assumed he was confirming I was saying it was mine. I nodded and grabbed the tag, showing him my name. "See? Mein."
"Wo ist dann mein Gepäck?"
I didn't know what he was saying, but I extended my hand to take the suitcase from him. His gripped tightened. "Mein," I tried saying again. "Bitte. Ist mein."
"Nun, es ist gut, Sie haben bei Ihnen, aber wo ist mein Koffer?"
"I really don't understand what you're saying. But please give me my bag," I said to him.
He kept talking to me in German. There was nothing I could say to make him quiet. I had to grab it and run. But first I'd have to distract him. So I pointed my finger and shouted, "Look over there!" The moment he turned his head, I yanked the suitcase out of his hand and ran off in the other direction.
Once I thought I was far enough away, I came to a stop and doubled over. This was not a good start, but at least I hadn't lost my language. Who would have thought when coming to Korea I'd struggle with talking to a German. Just my luck.
It was time to find customs now. I wondered through the airport, looking at the signs on the way. As I rounded a corner, a very long line caught my attention. Following the mass of people to the front of the queue, I noticed a sign that read "customs". A sigh escaped my mouth. I noticed people who got off after me from my flight at the front of the queue. A whole plane had arrived whilst I was chasing down my luggage. I could have been out already if things when normally. This was going to take a while.
I finally made it through customs and was on my way out of the airport when someone bumped into me, knocking me to the ground.
"Oh shit! Hey!" I called out, but the guy had already started running. The contents of my handbag had scattered everywhere. This was not going to be a good day. My eyes started to sting. I wanted to curl up next to my mum and dad and cry about everything going wrong. But I immediately shook away the thought. I had to be strong. I decided to move here to get away from everything. I wanted to become strong and not depend on anyone. And that meant I'd have to deal with rude people on my own.
A figure appeared in front of me and started gathering my things. He handed them to me with a smile.
"Thank you," I mumbled, taking them from his hands.
"It is good," he replied.
It suddenly dawned on me that I spoke English to a Korean. "Oh! I mean, gamsahamnida!"
"You speak Hangukeo?" he asked in Korean.
"Ne. I just forgot momentarily that I am in Hanguk and should speak Hangukeo." I brushed my hair out of my face. This was turning out to be one hell of a day. Losing my luggage, caught at customs, and now I'm struggling to string sentences together in Korean. What if I couldn't do this? I put everything back in my bag.
"Where are you going? Can I help you bring your luggage to a taxi or where ever you're going?"
"Oh, that's okay. You don't have to." The offer warmed me slightly. Unlike the German guy, this person was being rather kind. But I couldn't be touched by this. I couldn't rely on people to help me.
"I insist." He got to his feet and put a hand in my eye sight.
Reluctantly, I looked the man in the eyes. My heart nearly skipped a beat. It was what I dreaded: meeting a man my age and being attracted to them. Every guy I knew back home was so familiar that my dead heart could not be swayed. Never mind that I had been so focused on Adam. Most men at home avoided hitting on me because I was Adam's girlfriend, Adam's ex, they had known me since primary school, or because they knew with everything that happened, I'd never be interested. I had become the talk of all my friends, and their friends. I was off limits. But something about being in this new country made me momentarily forget all that. For a moment, this guy's round face, clear complexion, and comforting deep brown eyes made me want to swoon. But the awe passed and was replaced by weariness. Who was this guy making my heart skip a beat? What type of person is he? Is he the type of guy who moves on as quickly as Adam? Would he too not show up at the hospital when I was about to go through a traumatic experience that women never want? Would he too eventually tire of me and get mad at me every time I cried because I had lost something from within me?
He smiled at me and shook his hand slightly.
Finally, reality kicked in. This guy did not know me. There were more people living in Seoul than in all of Australia. I would never run into this guy again. He was just some stranger who saw a person fall to the ground and helped them get up. My thoughts disappeared and I slipped my hand in his. I was surprised by how much taller he was than me. I resisted the urge to look him up and down, but I noticed he was in nice attire. This was something I was definitely looking forward to: people dressing nicely. In Australia, you were lucky to see a guy wearing closed in shoes, but here appearance is important.
"I'm just catching the bus," I told him.
He grabbed my luggage and started leading me in the direction in which I assumed the bus was.
Did I just have an unlucky start? Will things be okay like this when I exit this airport? When I finally step on Korean grounds, will all the drama just disappear? Will all people be as friendly as this guy?
"Where are you from?" he suddenly asked, pulling me from my thoughts.
"Hoju," I replied.
"Aren't hoju saram supposed to be tan?"
A smile spread onto my face. I liked the question. Whenever any tourists or foreigners came to Australia, we would always generalise them and ask questions. It felt odd to be in their shoes but I liked it. Now I would be asked the questions. Now I would get the attention. "A lot of us come from European backgrounds. Those from places like Italy and Spain are more likely to tan. I, unfortunately, have an..." I came to a stop. "What's Irish in Korean?" I asked myself in English. Then it came to me. "I'm an idiot," I mumbled. "Aillaendeu background," I finished.
He chuckled.
My turned to look at him. "What's funny?"
"I've never met a Westerner before. I've met some Thai, Japanese, and Chinese people before, but never Westerners. When they struggle with Korean it doesn't seem as funny. I think it's mostly because Westerner accents are much more noticeable than Asian accents. I always see Westerners in movies seeming so calm and collected, but when you approach a foreign language it seems funny."
The thought of international students I met at university in Australia popped into my head and I smiled. I knew exactly where he was coming from. "Well you're one to talk. You should hear a Korean attempt to speak English. It's so bad! All the other Asians are better at speaking English than Koreans."
"That's very true... Although some of us are quite good at it."
"Yeah, but only the ones that seem to have grown up speaking English as well as Korean, like some actors in Korean dramas."
"You watch Korean dramas?"
"Oh definitely. What do you think inspired me to learn Korean?"
"Because we have such a lovely language?"
He was right there too, but I wasn't going to get into that. We had arrived at the bus station and he handed over my suitcase handle.
"Gamsahamnida," I said, bowing my head. "I really appreciate the help and company. It cheered me up."
"My pleasure. I hope you have a great time in Korea."
I turned around and climbed onto the bus, hauling my suitcase on behind me. I found a seat by the window and looked out. I watch the stranger as he walked away, thankful for our encounter. Sometimes you never know how an act of kindness can turn someone's day around.
My eyelids felt heavy. I rested my head against the glass. I couldn't fall asleep otherwise I'd miss my stop. A yawn escaped my mouth, forcing my eyes closed. It felt good to close my eyes. I was so tired. I'll just rest my eyes for a couple of seconds, I told myself.
"Jeogiyo," a voice said, stirring me slightly. A hand gently shook my shoulder. "Jeogiyo. Sonnim. Jeogiyo."
My eyes flew open. The bus driver stood in front of me.
"Excuse me, sonnim. This is the last stop. You have to get off now."
I stood up. "Last stop? What do you mean? Where are we?"
"Seongnam."
"Where is that? Where is Seoul National University?"
"Sonnim, that stop was an hour ago. You will have to get off now. Maybe you can call a taxi?"
The bus driver helped me off the bus, putting my luggage on the ground. Could this day get any worse?
I stood by the side of the rode for a moment, watching the bus drive away. Again, my eyes started to sting with tears, but I shook away the thoughts. I will not cry. I will be strong. I will find my way to the uni. It will all be okay.
"Sillyehamnida," I said as I approached a woman standing outside a pub.
"What?"
"How do I get from here to Seoul National University? I got off at the wrong stop. Are there any buses that run from here back to that part of Seoul any time soon?"
"Do I look like someone that attends Seoul National University?" she scoffed and walked away from me.
"I was only asking," I mumbled.
I kept walking down the street, asking people along the way the same thing I had asked the woman before.
"Sillyehamnida."
"I don't understand you."
"Sillyehamnida."
"Fuck off."
"Sillyehamnida."
"What?"
"Sillyehamnida."
"No."
"Sillyehamnida."
"Go away, foreigner."
I pulled out my phone and turned it on. No service, it read. I really hate today.
Eventually I came across a convenient store and went inside. I figured I may as well get something to eat. This might be a long night.
As I purchased a ramen cup, I asked the lady, "sillyehamnida, but would you know if any more buses come out this way that would take me to Seoul National University?"
"No, sorry. This is more of an end-of-the-line stop. Busses only run from here in the morning. I would suggest a train, but you've just missed the last one."
"Okay. Thank you anyway. Do you mind if I eat this here?"
"Go ahead."
I sat down at one of the bar stools toward the back of the shop and ate my cup ramen that the ajumma cooked for me in the small store kitchen. As I ate my noodles, I wondered how I'd get to the university. Would I have to stay at a hotel? Would the ajumma have a phone book so that I could call a taxi? How much would a taxi cost? I don't have much cash on me.
"Sonnim?" the ajumma asked as she approached me.
"Ne?"
"Do you still need a ride to the university?"
I nodded.
"My grandson lives out that way, but he's stopping by to visit his family. I called him and asked him to stop here on the way. Would you like him to give you a ride back?"
"Yes. That would be so great!"
"Okay. He will be here in about ten minutes."
I got to my feet and bowed. "Gamsahamnida, ajumma. Really. Gamsahamnida."
On time, the ajumma's grandson arrived. He looked as though he was around my age.
"Do Yun! Come here," ajumma called out.
"What did you want, halmeoni?" the guy asked, giving me a questionable look.
"Are you heading back to your university tonight?"
He nodded.
"Would you be able to give this lady a ride? She has to go to Seoul National University."
"Does she even speak Korean?"
"Yes I do speak Hangukeo," I interrupted their conversation.
He raised an eyebrow at me. Something about this guy was bugging me. He wasn't being very respectful to his grandmother.
"Will you pay me?" he asked me.
I frowned. I barely had five dollars on me. I spent most of my cash on the ramen. "I can't now, but I could get some money out tomorrow and pay you back if you'd like to meet up."
"Oh he's just joking," the ajumma said. "He will take you back for free. Right, Suk Do Yun?" She threateningly whispered in his ear, "I will write you out of my will if I have to."
He forced a smile at his grandmother. "Anything for you halmeoni." He turned to me. "Well come on then. I don't have all night."
I quickly got up and followed him out when we were suddenly standing in front of a motorbike.
"You're kidding, right?" I asked.
"What do you mean?" He handed me his spare helmet.
I hesitated at taking the helmet and looked at my suitcase. "How am I supposed to carry this?"
He walked closer to me and forced the helmet onto my head, buckling it up under my chin. He then grabbed my suitcase and pulled the handle up.
"Hold onto it tightly," he said, and climbed onto the motorbike.
I wanted to throw my suitcase at him. But he was my ride home. And I was too weak.
I mounted the motorbike and held the suitcase with my right hand behind me. I was definitely going to fall off. I had never been on a motorbike before.
"I suggest you put your arm around me," he yelled.
Reluctantly, I wrapped my free arm around his waist. The bike took off.
Admittedly, the ride was more fun than I imagined. I found myself squealing for joy at one point until I realised I was probably annoying Suk Do Yun and immediately stopped.
Nearly an hour later we pulled up in front of Seoul National University. I climbed off and handed back the helmet.
"I know your grandmother said not to, but maybe you could come by the front tomorrow and I can pay you? I feel bad that you've gone out of your way."
"No. It's fine. My university is out this way anyway."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah. Look, I have to go. Don't go getting lost again okay."
"Let me at least give you what I have left in my wallet."
He took off his helmet and stared at me for a bit. "You really want to repay me?" he asked.
I nodded. He was being such a jerk, but I hated the idea of owing him.
"Then why don't you come back to my dorm and pay me back some other way."
"You're disgusting!"
He laughed and put the helmet back on. "See you."
With that, he took off.
Turning around, I started heading toward the university in search of my dorm.
I turned on the light as I entered my room.
"What do you think you're doing?" a woman shouted. "Turn that thing off!"
I immediately turned the light off. "I'm sorry."
"And shut up!" she said, throwing a pillow in my direction.
"Sorry."
I placed my suitcase at the end of the bed on the opposite side of the room and fumbled around into bed. I had imagined my meeting with my roommate would go down much more smoothly than this. But I also assumed I would get in earlier than this.
I removed my shoes and uncomfortable clothing. I didn't want to bother my roommate any more by going through my suitcase to get my pyjamas on. I pulled my phone out of my bag and checked the time. 11pm. I could see a few missed calls from my parents. I wanted to call them back and just hear their voices, but I hated the idea of standing in the hallway.
"Put your phone down and go to sleep," my roommate groaned.
I turned the light of my phone off and placed it under my pillow. It could all wait until tomorrow.
I rolled onto my side and faced the wall. There had been so many rude people today. Were young Koreans all like this? They definitely aren't like they are in Korean dramas. The stranger from the airport suddenly flashed through my mind. He was nice. Why couldn't he be someone I was going to see day in day out? Why can't my roommate be someone nice like him? Why couldn't the guy on the motorbike have been like him? The guy from today was definitely much older than Suk Do Yun. If everyone at uni was like Suk Do Yun and my roommate, then I was dreading it already.
"You can always come right back home if you don't like it. You room will always be here," my father's words echoed through my head. What I'd give to be in my own bed right now. What I'd give to be crying about today to my father or my mother. Or to be able to call up Jess and whinge about the guy on the bike. Or crawl into Adam's arms and have him soothe me. The tears that had been threatening to spill all day finally came pouring out. I held back the audible sobs. I wanted to go home. I didn't like it here. This was not how I thought it would be. I hate it. I want to go home.
___________
Word list:
Jeogiyo – Excuse me (to get someone's attention)
Sonnim – guest/customer
Sillyehamnida- excuse me (politely interrupt someone to ask them something or apologise for bumping into them)
Halmeoni- grandmother
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