Skylar
"So not only did he ask you out, he was so nervous that he couldn't even speak?" Lily questioned and she spooned around with her ice cream sundae. A day had passed since Tristen officially asked me out and even though I'd been ecstatic, I am still a little skeptical about whether Tristan can completely break things off with Tracy. I mean, they have history. History that ran deep. I felt wrong stepping in and trying to claim him as mine but I want him. I want us to be in a relationship. I want us to go out on dates, talk to one another, and really get to know each other. I want to know more about his family and I'm sure he has some questions about mine as well.
I just don't want any complications. And if I didn't want that, then Tristen needs to break it off with her. I know that she's been through a lot, and I know that she's still holding onto him as her support but they're toxic for each other, his words, not mine.
Lily had come home this morning but Maddie was still nowhere to be found. I tried calling her cell all this morning and at noon but to no avail did it help with us locating her. I know that Maddie has a temper and I completely understand that she could be hurt by Lily speaking her truth, but I just seriously wanted to make sure that she was okay. At the end of the day, she was my friend. And I for one didn't appreciate her leaving without a trace to find her.
"Yup," I smiled at her, biting a piece of my vanilla ice cream sandwich. I'd been craving something sweet all day so when Lily messaged me to meet her at the new ice cream place that opened around campus, I didn't want to say anything but yes. "He also told me about his past. Well a little of his past and the details of his relationship with Tracy," I said, remembering all the horrid things she'd had to endure at the orphanage.
"Relationship? So he's dating her while trying to date you?" Lily asked. Sighing deeply, she stabbed her sundae. "I told that fucking idiot that he needed to stop playing with your heart and now he has you in a love triangle!"
"What?" I pondered. "There's no love triangle, Lily." I chuckled, smiling at her now dented sundae. "They used to date a while back, but they've known each other since he was about eleven,"
She gasped, completely dropping her spoon and gaping at me. "Eleven? He's like what? Nineteen or twenty maybe, that's like nine to ten fucking years, Sky!"
"Nineteen," I corrected. I knew his age because last night, we'd decided to have small talk while eating before I ultimately fell asleep, completely forgetting that I had homework. When I awoke in the morning, Tristen had been gone, but not completely. He left a note stating that he had some business to take care off and things to do. And he'd also sent messages throughout the day just to make sure I was holding up correctly.
"Yeah and that's a whole lot of time!" She pronounced. "Wow, Sky, I'm all for this, but just be careful. History like that doesn't just completely vanish away. It takes time. Are you willing to stay by him if he can't let her go?"
Was I? Was I ready to accept that maybe he'd never let her go. Maybe if we were to get together and I met his family, she'd be there. His family is already used to seeing him with her, would they even accept me? I don't think I'd get a friendly welcome from them. I don't even think I'd get so much as a glare from her either.
But even as my thoughts belittled me, I squared my shoulders. "I believe that if he cares about me enough, he'll understand that I am just as important to him as she may be. I'm not forcing him to choose between us, I just want him to commit to me if he wants to be with me," I said my truth. This wasn't about who could get Tristen and keep him. I wasn't trying to trap him into being with me. I wasn't trying to manipulate him either. This was as much his decision as it is mine. "I'm taking it slow, I don't want to rush things," I told her.
She runs a hand through her dark hair and sighs. "Okay, I support you with whatever," she adds, smiling up at me and raising two thumbs. "But off of that, the holidays are coming up,"
"Yeah, I figured that time would come soon,"
"With everything going on, now I kinda don't mind going back home. My aunts kid will annoy me to death but I'd rather that then to put up with all this drama," she sighed and even as she didn't hint at any names or incidents, I knew what drama she was talking about.
"Lily? Have you spoken to her?"
"Who?" She feign her confusion, tearing her eyes from mine and picking up her spoon. She scooped up a spoon of ice cream and plopped it in her mouth.
"Maddie," I answered. "I've called her so many times but she hasn't answered. I'm worried."
Lily shrugged and rolled her eyes in the process. "If she cared about your feelings, she would show up or call back instead of having you worry,"
"Me?" I didn't miss the hint that she hadn't used "our" or "we". "Do you not care that she could be in trouble or hurt?"
"I don't even know of this Maddie that you speak of," she sneered. "She obviously doesn't care about us, Sky."
I sighed. "Maybe she's just angry right now,"
A bitter laugh escaped Lily's mouth. "Angry? Skylar, she's angry at everyone. She's angry at her sister for stealing 'her man', she's angry at Kent for getting her sister pregnant and marrying her. She's angry at her niece and nephew because they magically didn't disappear like she'd hoped they would. She's angry at her mother and father for taking her sister in and helping her with her kids. She's not just angry at us, Skylar. She's angry at the world. She's angry at herself. And for Christ Sakes, I'm tired of it," she huffed, pushing the rest of her sundae away. "She needs to understand that her actions come with consequences. Everything doesn't revolve around her,"
I couldn't fathom the wrenching punches to my gut as I thought about what Maddie had done. I don't comprehend it. I don't think I'd ever understand the reason of why she was doing this. I don't understand how she could intentionally hurt her sister and her niece and nephew but I didn't want to judge her. I didn't want to criticize what I didn't know. Maybe she was fighting her own problems. It seems as if we all were trying to hide our past and build a better future. But I couldn't see how Maddie was building her future by doing this.
"She's still our friend, Lily. We have to help her," I answered, trying to make her see that maybe Maddie needed us. Maybe she just needed that support and guidance.
Lily shrugs at me. "You can give her your help. I'm keeping mine for someone who's worthy of it," she barked.
I sighed, feeling a bit defeated and discouraged. "I just want to be there for her, you know, help her."
"Look," Lily squared her shoulders. "I love you like my sister. And the same went for Maddie. I care about her deeply but I can't stand around and watch her deliberately tear her family apart for some boy," Sighing lowly, she added. "I want her to be happy as I do you. But what's different around you and her is that you listen. Maddie is way too stubborn to take or even listen to my advice."
Even as her words were true, I didn't want to be on anyone's team. I want us to end whatever back and forth drama this was. I want to talk to Maddie to figure out the purpose of her betrayal. I just can't accept what she has given. I can't accept her just disappearing. And I surely can't accept the fact that she's trying to break her family apart. But I drop the subject, refusing to bring the energy down more than it already has gone.
Right now was time to spend with Lily and I couldn't let Maddie's disappearance ruin that.
*****
"How is she having sex with Aiden? I thought she liked Jack!" Lily screamed at the rectangular screen of my laptop.
We both had just come back from class and decided that we'd watch Revenge. What can I say, we're two adults stuck in our teenage ways. Well, technically, both of us are teens and adults at the same time, seeing as how I am eighteen and Lily is nineteen. But anyway, after class, we decide to watch Revenge because Lily didn't believe she'd be able to handle watching another episode of Pretty Little Liars.
But it's a good thing I enjoyed watching Revenge. Emily was really smart but sometimes she makes really crazy decisions. Like right now, she's getting down and dirty with a guy from her past when she's supposedly in love with her childhood best friend. Interesting, right? Well Lily her is really into this show and she can't seem to take her eyes from the screen.
"But Aiden is really hot! Oh God! I don't know if I want her with Aiden or Jack but---" she paused and look down at the bed.
"What?" I asked, looking at he while she stopped the show and begin touching around the bed.
"Something is vibrating," she announced, still fumbling to find whatever she was looking for. Her hand slipped under the sheets and she pulled out my phone.
I don't even remember putting it there but I took it thankfully. "Thank you," I told her. She nodded and pressed play, diving back into the world of Revenge. I turned to the side and checked my phone. I had a missed call from Ryan and two messages from Tristen. I decided to check Tristen's messages first and mentally remind myself to call Ryan later.
I want to see you.
Are you free tonight? I want to take you out.
A soft smile illuminated on my face as I read his message. Lily being so engrossed in the show probably didn't even realize that I wore a creepy smile on my face but I wasn't complaining. I didn't want her to think I was crazy over a simple text message.
Yes, where are we going? I sent the message to him, breathing a bit heavily as I waited for a response.
It's a surprise but don't wear a dress. I'll pick you up at 8.
I stared at the text for a while. No dress means.... Maybe we're doing something physical. Maybe like dirt bike riding or maybe he's gonna take me hiking....whoa, hiking at eight PM? Do people really do that? I'm not even sure but I really wanted to know where we were going. But then again, I really wanted to see how much effort he's gonna put into our first date.
First date.
That sounds so weird to say.
I'm finally going on a date with Tristen.
"Why are you grinning like that?" I stare up at Lily with confusion slapped dead on her face. Her nose is scrunched up and she's looking at me with her head cocked to the side.
"Tristen messaged me." I smiled, "he wants to go on a date tonight,"
"Tonight?" Lily pondered, her voice sounding a bit sad.
"Yeah, what's wrong?"
Her frown deepened. "Aw, that means I'm gonna be all alone. I was hoping we could stay in and watch shows all night and eat and do girl things, but I guess," My smile seemed to falter. Since Maddie left, I could tell that Lily has been missing her. She's been hanging around me or Claire for the past day or two and I haven't really seen her make any moves to step foot in her room if she wasn't going to bed or taking a shower.
"It's fine, I'll just cancel with Tristen." I nodded, smiling at her to reassure her that I wouldn't just abandon her so carelessly. But as I picked up my phone again to tell him, she grabs my wrist.
"What? Are you crazy? This hot bad boy just made plans with you. Don't let me ruin your night! It's fine, I'll just go over to Claire's and bother her," she smirked but I could see that she really didn't want me to leave her.
"No, really Lily. I can stay,"
She shook her head. "Uh-uh, no-no, not happening. Matter of fact, what time is it?"
I check my phone. "Six-thirty-eight,"
"Perfect! We can get you dolled up and nice and sexy for your first date!" She grinned at me, already shutting my laptop and scooting off the bed.
"I'll go get my makeup box and a curling rod. You can borrow some of my clothes if you want,"
"Seriously? You're gonna help me?"
She nodded. "Duh, that's what friends are for, Sky. Now hurry! I want to try this cute hairstyle I saw on tumblr a few days ago and I have this spectacular make up look and....OH! Sky! This is gonna be amazing!" She clapped her hands repeatedly and grinned as she probably pictured everything in her head.
Without warning, she galloped into her room and in less than seconds I heard her causing a commotion in her room.
I smiled to myself as I thought about the potential possibilities of tonight. Finally, this is my chance. My chance to hopefully start a relationship with the guy I want. I'm not sure what's gonna happen tonight but I'm hoping for the best.
*****
"Bam! And you're done!" Lily giggled, spinning my desk chair around so I could see myself in the mirror stand that she'd brought in.
I'd taken a shower and Lily helped me pick out something that was cute and comfortable. I wore a grey crop top, black high-waisted jeans with silver strappy sandals. I'd picked out a black blazer from Lily's closet but she said she liked the outfit without the blazer. Me on the other hand, I felt more comfortable with the blazer. Lily had curled my hair and then laid down my back in loose wavy curls. Lily had just finished my make up. She'd agree that I was perfect without make up but she wanted to add some shimmer to my face. That consist of a neutral eye shadow color, lip stick, and something called highlighter. I'm not sure what that was but Lily said it would make my cheekbones pop. So I let her do whatever she wanted to do with my face.
And now as she turned me around, I was glad that I hadn't rejected anything. The bold lip did make me a bit self-conscious but I didn't feel like removing it. The burgundy colored lip looked well with the eyeshadow. My hair framed my face and the curls were perfect.
I know I don't like wearing my hair down, but since I started, it hasn't been that awful. I've always had a fear of wearing it down because I thought it made my face seem chubbier than it already is, but I've grown to not look at it that way anymore. With my hair done right now, it looks amazing and I can't thank Lily enough for helping me tonight.
"Thank you so much, I'm glad you were here tonight," I told her, getting up from my seat to give her a warm tight hug.
"No problem," she said, returning my hug. "You know you're like a little sister to me, girl." She giggled, beginning to collect her stuff. She's told me that since she didn't want to stay here all alone that she'd be going to hang out with Claire for the rest of the night. "You make sure you text me if he does something stupid, alright? I'll be so quick to shove my foot up his ass,"
I laughed lightly, but for some odd reason, I knew Lily wasn't joking around. Well maybe she was, half-joking.
She gathered her things as I examined myself in my floor length mirror. I'd totally changed since I'd arrive here. I don't think it was considered to be a bad change though. I think I'm growing as a person and I'm trying my best to speak up and not let people walk over me. I'm trying to gain self confidence and be self assured. I have to understand that not everyone is gonna think you're perfect but it's important to keep the people that love you the most around you.
"Remember, text me when you sense stupidity!" Lily said before leaving my room once she got a nod from me in understanding.
I checked the time. Seven-fifty-three. I don't remember all that time flying by but Tristen would be here in a few short minutes and I wanted to prepare myself for his arrival. Although I knew Tristen was trying to detangle himself from Tracy, I wanted to be assured that whatever they had was done with and over. I wanted his confirmation that he wasn't romantically involved with her anymore.
But I know it would take time. All things do. But the main thing that I needed to be asking myself is whether or not I'd be willing to stick around if it didn't happen soon.
But I didn't want to annoy my thoughts tonight.
Tonight I was going on a date. And as Lily said before, it was with a hot bad boy.
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A boring chapter! 😞 I'm sorry! I give you permission to beat me repeatedly with Thor's hammer!
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