That last chapter. Don't kill me for doing this :o
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***June's POV***
I couldn't sleep. I was just tossing and turning, sometimes wiping the tears in my eyes, sometimes curling up in a ball. I didn't know what to do anymore, what to feel.
After he left, I've been feeling just empty. It felt like a huge part of me died when he walked away today. I tried to stop him by running after him, but he was gone.
I didn't feel like celebrating the new year after that. I locked myself in my room and hid inside my blankets. Emma had been calling me so I switched off my phone. I felt so bad for ruining my family's new year too. Now, I knew even Emma wouldn't go anywhere to celebrate. Mom, Ella and Jay were celebrating with each other in the living room. But I knew mom wasn't really enjoying down there. She was worried too.
I felt like a coward for hiding in like that. But I also felt my insides disappearing and making me feel like there was a hole inside. Like someone has stabbed a knife inside.
I thought of calling him, million times. But the regret of all that I said back then rushed back in my mind and I didn't feel like I had the courage to face him so soon. I would wait at least till tomorrow. I would have to tell him to not spoil our friendship again. I couldn't lose my best friend again.
I leaned up and glanced at the wall clock. It said 2 AM. I was pretty sure everyone was asleep, so I made my way downstairs to the kitchen. All the lights were off so my assumptions were true then. I opened the fridge and tried finding something to eat while breathing heavily. I've got cold and a soar throat from all the crying I've done. I actually felt my eyes burning. They were swollen too. And my cheeks freezing from the temperature outside. I found some left over noodles and started heating them up in the microwave.
"Unhealthy habits queen!" I heard an amused voice. I turned around and found Emma standing there with her arms folded on her chest.
"Says the girl obsessing over Drake!" I rolled my eyes and replied with sarcasm.
"Hey! Juney's sarcasm is back!" She squeaked and ran to me, awkwardly side hugging me. I smiled half hearted at her and hugged her back.
Then taking out my meal from the microwave, I sat at the counter stuffing everything in my mouth. Being sad always made me hungry. I felt like eating everything and everyone.
"So, now mind telling me your sob story?" She sat next to me, cupping her cheeks in her palms.
"Mind telling me why you're up at this time?" I asked with mouthful of noodles.
"Oh, my obsession is here." She grinned, saying. I mentally smirked at my brilliant way of changing the topic from me to her.
"Shut up! Drake's here?" I smiled and asked.
"In the living room. We were planning babies when I heard Miss hungriness. So I excused myself and came to your rescue." She replied, picking up an apple from the fruit basket and taking a bite.
"Seriously, can't you ever answer something soberly?" I asked her.
"That's something I've learned from my mother " she half smiled and answered.
I looked at her, wondering how much pain she would have felt when her mom started hating her.
"Enough with distracting topics. Sob story time!" Clapping her hands, she asked.
"He tried to kiss me." I made sure to look downwards while saying it.
"And?" Her grin was obvious when she asked.
"And what? I told him we can't do the benefits thing again and he said he felt something else for me." I made funny signs with my hand while telling her.
"Then what is the problem?" She whined.
"That he's not totally sure what he feels for me. I can't take a risk at that again. His friendship means very much to me," I mumbled, stupidly.
"You're the dumbest girl I've ever seen!" Drake's voice echoed from somewhere.
"And I hate you!" I said back.
"Tell me, what did you say to him after he told you he felt something?" He walked inside to sit near Emma and asked.
"I told him to figure out and then come. And then we started fighting...and he left saying that he didn't deserve me, he already knew!" My voice choked as I said this, remembering the hurtful expression of his face while saying that. Why did I lose my senses that time? I should've done something, anything to stop him.
"Man! You girls are so dumb!" He held his head and shook it, cursing.
"Shut up Dracula! She's in no mood of this. Give her the boy advice," Emma smacked his head and hissed.
"Don't call me that." He glared at her and then turned to me.
"First of all my dear friend, when a guy says he feels something for you, he feels a lot more than just something. And second of all, if he says he doesn't deserve you, only he deserves you!" He explained.
The idiotic head of mine started working and the beating of my heart was so fast that I could hear it now. Was he really saying this? Please tell me this isn't a lie.
"So...does that...does that mean he..." I stuttered, not able to gulp down the food now.
"He really really likes you." Drake smiled, saying.
"You know something? I hate that guy and he annoys me so much I want to kill him and all...but I can't really refuse and I hate to say this to you, but he's the only one for you. I even think he loves you," Emma said, forcing a smile. I would have laughed at her at this but my mind was too busy registering all the information. I didn't even feel hungry anymore. The butterflies filled all the empty space in my belly. I felt like a light bird.
Okay... I felt like I was high.
"Your face is priceless!" Drake started laughing after saying this.
"Now we'll leave you and your lovesick head. We have babies to make." Emma winked while saying and then dragged Drake out to the living room.
I was still numb from all that I heard. Was it...was it true?
Could it be true?
Zayd loving me. Zayd in love with me. These thoughts felt so good just in my mind. These thoughts felt so out of place but so much better. I could imagine how good and bubbly I would feel if all this would turn into reality. My face finally broke into a smile, a blushing one. I hid my face in my hands and grinned all that I wanted.
If this all was true, and if anything like this is meant to happen, I'll be the one to confess first. I will tell him I love him before him. I wanted to say those words to him so badly from so many freaking months. I wanted to get that feeling of finally expressing my long hidden feelings.
Oh how I felt at the top of the world right now.
I left the rest of the food in the plate and ran up in my room. The time was 3 AM now. But I couldn't wait for the morning. I couldn't wait to fall in his arms.
I was so eager for my dreams to turn into reality.
I love you so much Zayd....
And with this thought, I finally fell asleep with a smile on my face.
The next morning I was up early and tried to do everything faster. I didn't eat breakfast and dreamed of eating it with him after our confessions. I dressed up in a grey dress, which highlighted my eyes very much. I did that because I wanted him to notice me. Glancing at myself one last time in the mirror, I sighed and headed downstairs.
"Come on, you can do this June!" I said to myself and took deep breaths, rubbing my palms against one another. It was so bloody cold. Even if I wore my cardigan on the dress and boots, I was freezing.
When I reached the living room, I was more than surprised to see a familiar figure on the couch.
"Dad!" I excitedly ran to him and squealed. He stood up and hugged me.
"Hello sweetheart. Happy new year," he kissed the top of my head and murmured.
"Happy New Year! What a surprise!" I smiled saying.
Just then, my eyes landed on a beautiful woman seated on the same couch as dad. Her eyes were same, big and blue.
"You must be Ella's mom. Hey, I'm June." I extended my hand towards her, introducing.
As much as I hated her daughter, it wasn't this lady's fault.
"I'm Kaya, nice to meet you June." She smiled back and greeted me.
"Here, we brought some gifts for you and your mom." She gave me three boxes of presents and I accepted them happily.
"There was no need for these, Kaya," I heard mom's voice from behind and I turned to find her sitting on the opposite couch.
"There was! You agree or not, you're a lady with a golden heart. Jay and Ella keeps saying you treated them just like a mother would." Kaya smiled while her eyes filled, saying this.
"That's because they are my children too. I didn't mind anything about them. In fact we both loved having them here. Thank you for these anyways." Mom replied. I kept the presents on the table and excused myself to go to the kitchen.
"You're such a weird person!" Ella's voice reached my ears and then I saw her and Emma sitting on the breakfast counter glaring at each other. Jay was seated quietly, eating his cereal.
"Keep saying that, bitch." Emma laughed and replied.
"Seriously, shut up you two." I groaned and sat down there too.
I filled a glass with orange juice when I heard Ella laughing sarcastically.
"What?" I asked her.
"You're behaving nicely because I'm leaving, really?" She asked, making faces.
"What? You're leaving?" My eyes popped out when I asked that.
The happiness was clearly evident in my voice.
"Can't you even fake sadness?" She scowled and asked.
"No, can't. I'm so happy today." I grinned at her, showing no mercy.
"I can't believe I'm going to do this but...I'm sorry, okay? I'm quite a bitch and I'm aware of that. But my apology doesn't mean we're on good terms. You'll always be my biggest and nastiest enemy half sister. I still hate you." She said that all at once, not even blinking once. I was baffled at her confidence but then a laughter escaped my mouth.
"You can't even apologize sanely. Anyways I'm sorry too, and I hate you too. You can leave as soon as possible, please!" I grinned and sang the last part.
She rolled her eyes at me, getting back at her cereal.
"I'll miss you Jay!" I pouted and said to him, kissing his cheek.
"Will miss you too Juney! I'll send you love letters." He kissed me back on my cheek and said. His cute and cheeky voice made me smile again and I chuckled at his love letter joke.
"Bad boy's gonna be jealous if you keep exchanging kisses like that with him." Emma laughed and spoke.
"Speaking of that, I'll leave now." I stood up, gulped down the juice in a go and made my way out of the kitchen.
"Oh-June?" Ella called out.
"Yeah?" I turned around, confused.
"Zayd never touched me because he wanted to. He was quite difficult to persuade, you know. He's a keeper, at least I think so... But whatever, go slap him or blow him, I don't really care." Ella said with a serious face.
I stared at her in amusement for sometime and then all of us broke into laughter.
What's with this strange side of this girl?
After that, I made a quick goodbye to mom, dad and Kaya and left for Zayd's place. I was having my happy dance and nervousness dance. What I was feeling more, I couldn't make out.
It didn't take much time to reach his mansion. I saw his car parked in the parking space and grinned that my assumptions of him staying at home were true. I almost ran myself to the door, ringing the bell too many times in excitement.
"June," Eddie opened the door, nodding and smiling at me like always.
But this time, his smile was different. It was sad, and half hearted.
"Zayd is in his room?" I asked, walking in like I owned the place.
"No,"
The reply came.
"But his car is outside. Is he having breakfast or something?" Confused, I inquired more.
"He left,"
Did I hear correct? No...no there is some mistake.
"What? I didn't hear correct actually..." I asked, my eyes afraid that I heard correct.
"He left, June, last night. He's going to live with his parents in Canada now," Eddie explained, walking towards me.
WHAT?
W.H.A.T ???
He just moved to another country? Just like that? He left?
How could he do this to me?
Was I not important enough?
My palms started sweating and my head started spinning. I felt sick and angry of everything suddenly. It was as if a lightening struck me.
He couldn't leave...he couldn't go...
Leaving me with all those feelings, that longing. No! He can't!
"Sit down, June, come here," Eddie held me by my shoulders and dragged me to the drawing room. He made me sit on the couch while I stayed still. I wasn't able to believe he just left. I felt numb, like a fool.
"He asked me to give this to you. I was going to visit you, but now that you're here, take this," he said.
I didn't look up at him to find what he was giving me. I kept staring at my shoes.
I felt a hand placing an envelope on my lap. Then I heard footsteps going away.
My gaze shifted to the envelope, furrowing my eyebrows and trying to understand what did it have. Very slowly, my hands held up the envelope and I read the name written on it.
Pandy :)
Staying stiff, I opened the envelope and found a piece of paper inside. It was a letter. A letter? That's it?
That's all he's left for me?
With a heavy heart, I unfolded the page and started reading.
"No. This is not a love letter, Pandy, come on stop day dreaming."
The first line itself made my lips curve up a little. I could literally see his signature smirk on his face as he said those words.
I continued reading.
"I thought a lot. About world domination. And figured out that vampires really needed me so I need to go.
Okay ..maybe I'm acting like a pussy and trying to distract you from the topic. So let's start again..
I thought about us a lot. I thought about how it all started and how it ended. How I screwed up and how you forgave me every time. I didn't even deserve your forgiveness but still you chose to do that.
You're an Angel, you know that? Only with a better figure, that is. And don't laugh, I've heard angels lack good figures. That's why I mentioned.
Okay no more distractions now...
If you are feeling sorry about what all you said yesterday, just don't! You should not be sorry at all. You said all the right things. You made me realize what I am and what the hell am I doing.
You always used to tell me 'grow some balls, Zayd.' And I always used to laugh it away.
But you know what? I really need to grow some.
(I'm not insulting my manhood here. I'm proud of it and you know why.)
And I need to grow those because I behaved like a pussy yesterday. I had a good chance, a very good chance of telling you what I feel for you. But instead, I said I feel something. Something?
I feel a lot more than something for you, June. When I say, you're beautiful, I mean it. When I say, you make my life better, I mean it. When I say, I can't live without you, I mean it.
And now, when I say that I'm in love with you, yes with you, I really really mean it.
You see, that's why I need to grow some balls. I never gathered the courage to tell you on face. I'm writing those sick type of letters to you.
And okay yeah, so this is a kind of love letter.
Please don't ask me, why, how and when I fell for my little best friend. Because I myself don't know the answer. It was just as easy yet overwhelming. I just woke up one morning and then seeing your face, I realized you're the one.
But maybe we aren't meant to be.
Because, every time we tried to be with each other, something or the other came in between.
And now, I know its too late. I know you've moved on. Like James said, now you'll never love me. I'd hurt you so much. I don't deserve you. I still believe you deserve a prince charming, not a bad boy. You're too good for that.
And so, I'm leaving. Off course I'll be back but after I make myself strong enough to face you. I love you that much June, that I can't help but hold you in my arms every time I see you. But now that you don't love me, I need some time. Time to be away and think everything thoroughly. I need to make up my mind that I can't have you. I'm sorry for being so selfish and leaving you alone, but it's just some time, maybe just a year, and then I'll get back. I'll be your old best friend again, the one who teased you till the end. I know you value our friendship very much. So this just an attempt to save it for you, baby.
You'll always be my stupid, silly, sarcastic as hell, beautiful best friend. You'll always be mine.
Lastly, please let me say this. I'm dying to say this out loud. I've been caging it inside me for so long now.
I love you...
God it feels so good saying this. Finally!
And Pandy? I hate saying this but don't contact me for sometime. I want to let myself go with the flow.
You're my strong girl and will always find a way to smile, I know. Your bitchy & annoying friend will keep you insane as ever. Tell her I hate her and she is still boob-less.
I already miss you silly girl but yeah, you can read this letter whenever you miss me. Off course you'll miss me! Everyone misses Zayden Parker!
*evilly smirks*
Take care cutie pie. Okay, just ignore that cheesy word.
Good bye Pandy
Love,
Zayd."
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The last chapter!!!!!
So.... liked it? loved it? or hated it?
Haha I know I'm evil and all, but I wanted to do this. Anyways, you still have that little little hope in your heart right? That in the 'Epilogue' something good will happen :D
So Keep hoping and keep reading.
Also, please check my new book called "The Perfect Mess"
It's a romantic and humorous novel and I bet you'll all love it :)
Go on my profile and add it in your library. The first chapter is not up yet, but you'll know the story plot by reading the A/N I've posted.
I'm working on the 'Epilogue' so you'll get to read it in this week.
Till then, miss me :P
-Ana
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PS: read the above line again :D