I stared at the door as Kawata walked out. Something was wrong. Well, while we're still in this hotel, everything is wrong. But it was clear to me that Kawata wasn't doing well.
I'd have to talk to him later. Right now, I have to head to the hospital. I stood up, taking a step and immediately collapsing to the ground. I paused for a moment, putting a hand over my heart. It was still racing a million miles an hour. I started taking deep breaths again. I still wasn't stable enough to stand. I helped myself up with the table next to me. I was still shaking violently, and my skin was pale and ghostly. I wouldn't be able to get to the hospital in this state. But... I had to try.
I stumbled out of the dining room, and started hobbling my way down the hall. God, it was hard to walk. I fell onto the floor, crumbling against the wall. I started taking deep breaths, trying to calm myself down. It's still in the back of my mind. God, why did I have to relive that memory? I'd avoided remembering that incident this whole time. And as soon as I relive it, I can't even walk. I started hyperventilating, unable to get myself to calm down.
"Hirano?" Someone said. I hurriedly tried to stand up, but stumbled over myself, falling to the ground. Before I hit the floor, I was grabbed by the arm and lifted up. "That was a close one." They laughed nervously. I looked up.
"O- Otani?" I blurted out. He smiled.
"H- hey, are you okay? You were just, laying in the hallway." Someone asked. It was Arima, who had been standing on the other side of Otani.
"O- oh, I'm alright. Thanks." I replied, standing up. Otani frowned.
"But... you're pale and shaking." Otani said. I paused.
"Y- yeah! I'm fine! I appreciate the concern." I insisted, turning my back to them and stepping forward. Suddenly, I felt light headed, tripping over myself and falling to the ground. But, yet again, before I hit the floor, Otani grabbed me by the arm and lifted me back up.
"Hirano..." Otani mumbled, looking at me sympathetically. I sighed.
"... s- sorry... yeah... I need some help..." I said. Arima walked over to me, letting my arm go on his opposite shoulder.
"W- well, good thing we're going t- to the hospital." Arima replied, smiling softly. Otani nodded.
"I'm a little bit confused though. Ressa said that the hospital was opened? Wasn't it always open?" Otani asked.
"I- I went there earlier today. Th- the front door was locked." I responded.
"Oh, um, okay. Let's head to the hospital now, o- okay?" Arima said. Otani grabbed my other arm, and smiled.
"Yeah, let's go." Otani replied.
We started walking to the hospital, my feet fumbling at every step. I couldn't walk. Why was that? Earlier, I'd stumbled over to the hospital in a trance. I'd felt sick, and tireless. It had been a horrifying feeling. Like... I was just aimlessly moving. Trying to find some safe place that didn't exist. That was horrifying. I want to go home. I want to see my dad. I want to sleep in my twin sized bed. And just... forget the world ever put me through all of this. Forget that this ever happened. And maybe... everything could be normal again.
"Hirano... why were you laying in the hallway?" Arima mumbled out of the blue.
"..." I stared at the ground for a moment. Should I tell them? "I..." Tears started to fall from my eyes. "I... I killed... someone..." I mumbled. Arima's eyes lost their sparkle, staring at me emotionlessly, his mouth agape. Otani didn't react, he just stared, trying to process the situation.
"What?" He blurted out, dropping my arm as he stepped away from me. "You... you what?" I stared at him, unable to respond.
"I- it wasn't anyone here... b- but..." I looked at the ground in shame. My heart started racing again. The lifeless face of Masako appearing in my head. I lost my breath, unable to stand. My legs crumbled, Otani reacting quickly to catch me.
"... no." Arima replied.
"No?" Otani responded.
"... no!" Arima snapped, shaking his head back and forth. "No! Hirano would never do that! Right Hirano?" He said, laughing nervously. Content with the answer that I was joking. Slowly, I turned to Arima, tears falling down my face.
"I- I'm sorry..." I said. Arima stared at me, unable to respond. All the color drained from his face. Everything was quiet. To quiet.
"Arima, let's-" Otani started. Arima put his pointer finger out to Otani, stopping him from saying another word.
"..." Arima put his other hand on the bottom half of his face, staring at the ground with wide, horrified eyes. Slowly, he looked back over to me, dropping both of his hands. "I..." he started. He looked down at the ground again. Without a word, he turned around, and walked over to the hospital, opening the door and wandering inside. Tears rolled down my cheeks.
"I'm sorry..." I said, covering my face with my hands, shoving my glasses to the top of my head. "I- I never should've said anything. I- I'm sorry... I- I'm such an idiot..."
"Hirano, it's okay." Otani replied. "Is this that secret we've been talking about?" I nodded, wiping the tears from my eyes. Otani took a moment to think, before grabbing the glasses from the top of my face, and placing them onto my nose. "I'm glad that you told me. It's not good to keep those kinds of feelings to yourself." Otani took another moment to think. "We can talk about it later, okay. And let people know about this. It might seem horrible, and maybe will like you less because of it, but the people who really care will still be in your life." Otani said. "I don't know what happened to cause that, but I know you, and I know that you wouldn't do something so harmful on purpose." Tears ran down my face.
"Th- thanks..." I wiped the water from my face.
"Now, let's head over to the hospital, to see what is going on." Otani replied. I nodded. Otani helped me up off the floor. I tried to stand up, but my legs buckled. "Do you need me to carry you?" I sighed.
"Um, uh, yeah..." I responded. Otani nodded, pulling me up and giving me a piggy back ride.
"Come on. Let's go." Otani said. He walked me over to the hospital, walking inside and up the stairs. Two other people were already at Imamura's door. Yamazaki and Arima. Otani put me down, helping me walk over to the two. This time, the door was clean, instead of being covered in Taguchi's blood.
"Why are you walking like that?" Yamazaki asked, looking at me with a puzzled expression. Otani let go of me, letting me stand up by myself.
"I'm just..." I glanced over at Arima. He avoided eye contact with me. I frowned, putting a hand on my arm. "... not having a good time." Yamazaki stared at me for a moment, before rolling his eyes.
"Kay. I really don't care." Yamazaki replied. I sighed, looking to the door.
"Should we... go in?" I asked.
"No!" Ressa said, dropping down from the ceiling.
"What the fuck!?" Yamazaki blurted out, looking down at the red panda with a disgusted expression. Ressa got up from the ground, clearing his throat, which he did not have because he is a robot.
"WHERE. IS. KAWATA. AND. SUGAI!?" Ressa snapped.
"Sugai hasn't come out of his room yet." Arima responded.
"Kawata is doing something right now." I replied. Yamazaki glared at me. I shrugged my shoulders. Ressa paused for a moment.
"Eh! Whatever!" Ressa laughed, kicking the door. The door fell off or it's hinges, falling to the ground. I stared inside, a smile crawling across my face.
In the hospital bed, was Imamura, sitting up in the hospital bed. Her two broken legs lifted up by a pillow. She wore a hospital gown, and seemed to be staring off into space.
"Imamura!" I shouted, happily walking over to her bedside. My legs finally seeming to work for once this entire day. Otani rushed over happily.
"Imamura! I'm so glad that you're okay-" Otani started, reaching his arms out for a hug. Imamura put one hand up, stopping Otani in his tracks. Everyone fell silent, slowly approaching the bed.
"... I- I'm so sorry Imamura..." I said, tears welling up in my eyes. "Taguchi... h- he-"
"I know." She replied, still not making eye contact with anyone in the group. She looked down at her hand. The hand she stared at was the one that had been covered in blood.
"... I'm so sorry that you got hurt..." Arima responded. Imamaura's eyes closed, taking a deep breath, as if she were trying to keep herself from showing anything. Not one feeling, or thought, or even a slight hint of effect from the situation.
"... thank you..." she paused. "... for saving me." Yamazaki rolled his eyes, walking towards the door.
"Yamazaki, you can't just-" Arima started trying to stop him from leaving the room.
"Let him go." Imamura stated. Everyone stared at her, puzzled but sympathetic expressions on their faces. For the first time since we started talking to her, she made eye contact with someone. With Yamazaki of all people. After a moment of thought. Her brows furrowed, glaring at him. "I don't want to see his pathetic ass face anywhere near me." Yamazaki rolled his eyes.
"The feeling is mutual, tyrant." He said, walking out of the room. Imamura's face was angry, but still calm. She looked like she wanted to yell something back, but she didn't. She was to tired to deal with him.
"... there aren't a lot of people here..." Imamura stated. She stared at the edge of her bed for a moment, trying not to make eye contact with anyone. "Who did it?"
"... who did what?" Arima replied.
"Who killed him?" She responded. She wasn't sugar coating it. She was demanding answers, but in such a calm way that she didn't seem phased by the circumstances. But it was clear that it hadn't set in yet.
"... Kajiwara..." Arima said. She paused for a moment, unable to think.
"What happened?" She asked.
"... Imamura, I don't think that you should-" I started.
"WHAT HAPPENED!?" She snapped. She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. "I don't care what it is. I want to know the truth."
"... Kajiwara tried to kill you, and Taguchi came and protected you, and got shot in the process." I replied. It hurt to say. But I knew it hurt more for Imamura. She didn't say anything for a while, she just stared aimlessly at the end of the bed.
"... am I dead?" She asked, looking up at the three of us, actually making eye contact with us.
"I hope not!" Arima said, trying to make a joke. He looked at the rest of us, his eyes softening, chuckling nervously as he shriveled up. "... no... you're not dead."
"... I should be dead..." Imamura replied.
"Taguchi saved you..." I said. She stared at me for a couple of seconds, trying to process.
"... so he saved me... and then tried to kill me..." she responded.
"I know this is a lot to take in. If you don't want to talk, we could do it later-" Otani stated.
"No." Imamura snapped. "I want to know everything."
"... okay. I'm sorry." Otani said. Imamura avoided eye contact.
"... it's fine..." she replied. Suddenly, something came into my head. A single thought, that invaded my head. But I couldn't talk about it. No, that would be to insensitive. "... what is it?"
"H- huh?" I replied, staring at her with wide eyes. She blinked, her face completely calm.
"... what do you want to ask me?" She responded. I dropped my head, nervously grabbing my arm.
"I- I shouldn't..." I said. Imamura stared at me.
"Just do it." She responded. I frowned, looking away. I took a deep breath.
"What... what happened on the roof?" I asked. Her eyes went wide. She went pale, nearly falling off of the bed.
"I- I'm sorry! I- I didn't mean to, I- I didn't want to ask! I- I just..." I started. I stared at Imamura, her eyes were closed, a conflicted look on her face. She opened her eyes.
"... can I talk with Hirano alone?" Imamura asked.
"Why?" Arima blurted out, he covered his mouth in shame. Imamura paused for a moment.
"I just..." she paused. "I just want to talk to Hirano right now... I can tell you later..." she said.
"N- no it's okay! I shouldn't have said that..." Arima replied. "Let's go Otani." Arima said, racing out of the room.
"I hope everything goes well." Otani stated, before following Arima out of the room. I looked to Imamura, a sad expression on my face.
"I'm sorry I asked... I can go..." I said. Imamura didn't reply. She just kept staring at the edge of her bed. I sighed, turning to leave. Suddenly, I was grabbed by the wrist, stopped in my tracks.
"... sit..." she responded. She paused. "... only if you want to..."
"... okay..." I said, sitting down on the bed, making sure not to sit on her legs. We sat in silence for a while. Neither of us willing to speak up.
"... it was my fault..." Imamura replied. I stared at her.
"What?" I responded.
"... I know you guys thought Taguchi pushed me. He didn't." Imamura said.
"Then..." I started, my words trailing off. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. A single tear started falling from her eye. Quickly, she wiped it away, her eyebrows furrowing.
"No matter what I say, I want you to stay silent until I'm done. I don't care if I say something rude about myself, or a claim that isn't true by your standards. I just want to get the story out. And you can tell everyone else. Because I probably won't be able to retell if after this. And you're the only person I trust enough to tell personally." She said. Tears welled up in my eyes.
"Do... do I really mean that much to you?" I asked. She rolled her eyes.
"Don't get to cocky. Causes some real problems." She replied. I giggled.
"I'll try not to." I responded. She smiled slightly, before closing her eyes, taking a deep breath.
"That night... I was really upset." She paused. It seemed painful to go back to. But it didn't seem like she was sad. More like... she just didn't want to talk about it. "I couldn't control my anger. So... I ran away..." she stopped, seeming upset that she had to give an explanation. "... to the roof..."
-flash back-
Imamura ran to the top of the hotel, shoving through the door that led to the roof. She fell to the ground, laying in a heap of tears. Quickly, she got back up, onto her feet. But she couldn't walk. One of her heels had broken when she'd raced through the door. She managed to get over to the edge of the roof, resting herself against the small wall, that only went up to about her knee.
"FUCK!!!" She barked, wiping tears from her eyes. She took her hands, and buried her face into them. And then, without warning, she started bashing one of her fists into the side of her head. "GET IT TOGETHER YOU MONSTER!!!" She screamed, still bashing the side of her head with her hand. Suddenly, the door knob to the roof slowly began to turn. Imamura quickly got herself together, wiping the tears from her face, and making her pose more confident. The door opened, Taguchi stepping out onto the roof. He had a huge bruise around his eye. Blood trickled from the scrape on his eyebrow, oozing straight down the side of his face. Imamura's eyes softened, before she glared at him. "Oh, it's just you." She said. Taguchi rolled his eyes, wincing slightly from the pain of the bruise. "How did you know I was up here? Did you follow me!? Because that's SUPER creepy!"
"First, ouch. Second, this is the place where you ran to the last time your feelings got hurt." Taguchi said.
"So you've followed me twice!?" Imamura snapped. Taguchi sighed, taking a step towards her.
"I'm sorry." Taguchi replied. Imamura stared at him, a look or disbelief on her face.
"What!? Why are you apologizing to me!?" She responded. Taguchi grinned.
"Well, I didn't let you kill Yamazaki, which I know you wanted to do." Taguchi said, laughing to himself. Imamura paused, unable to speak. Tears started to roll down her face. She turned her head away from him.
"Taguchi, you have to go." Imamura replied. Taguchi stared at her in disbelief.
"What?" He said.
"YOU HEARD WHAT I SAID!!!" She yelled. Taguchi frowned.
"Yeah, I did. But that doesn't mean I have to listen to you." He replied, taking another step forward.
"But you SHOULD!!! I'm asking you to LEAVE!!!" She screamed.
"Imamura, I know you. You need someone here for you. And I am. I'm thinking about your needs." Taguchi responded. Imamura wiped tears from her eyes.
"Well, I'm also thinking about yours. And if you don't want to get hurt, I'd suggest you leave." Imamura replied.
"It's to late for that." Taguchi said, chuckling to himself about his wit. Imamura started to smile, but it quickly faded.
"That doesn't matter! I need you to leave!" She demanded. Taguchi groaned.
"Imamura, please, just talk to me." She replied.
"No! I want to be alone!" Imamura snapped back.
"No! You don't! Stop lying to me!!!" Taguchi argued back.
"I'M NOT LYING!!! JUST GO!!!" Imamura barked.
"Why!? Why are you pushing me away!?" Taguchi yelled.
"BECAUSE I DESERVE TO BE ALONE!!!" Imamura blurted out, tears falling down her face.
"... what?" Taguchi said. Imamura started to sob, wiping away the water.
"I'm a horrible person! I've been mean! I've been cruel! I've been lying, I've been cheating, and I've BEEN SELFISH!!! I've hurt so many people, because I didn't care how they felt! I've been blinded by a morally correct goal, that I haven't stopped to think of how STUPID I've been! And I've even hurt people, because I'm so CONTROLLING, that I'VE INJURED PEOPLE BECAUSE I WAS ANGRY THAT I DIDN'T GET MY WAY!!!" Imamura sobbed. Taguchi stared at her in disbelief.
"Imamura, that's not-" Taguchi began.
"DON'T SAY I HAVEN'T DONE ANY OF THAT, BECAUSE I HAVE!!! LOOK AT YOU!!! I CAUSED THAT!!! I HURT SOMEONE I CARED ABOUT BECAUSE I WAS TO STUBBORN TO JUST LET THINGS BE!!!" She yelled, cutting him off. She slumped onto the floor, laying against the wall, as if she were a ragdoll lazily thrown to the side. "You've just been... so nice to me... and you deserve to actually have a friend who gives two shits about you, and isn't so... messed up. Mentally and physically. So please... just go." Taguchi stared at her in silence for a moment.
"Imamura-" He started.
"Stop. I don't want you to tell me that I don't have problems. I only want the truth. And I've already been honest. Like you asked." Imamura said. Taguchi didn't say anything. Tears appeared in her eyes. "Why aren't you leaving!? I- I, I don't know what else to say-"
"IMAMURA!!!" Taguchi yelled, cutting her off. "I need you to listen to me." Imamura folded her arms, angrily glaring at him. "I'm not a good person either. I've lied, I've cheated, and I've been horribly mean. Even if I didn't want to do those things, those are still my actions." Taguchi paused, realizing that a tear fell down his face. He quickly wiped it away. "I've been antagonized my entire life. By my parents. By my friends. By my peers. By everyone. And I thought that was all I was. But you showed me that's not true. You pushed me to be a better person."
"BUT THAT COULD HAPPEN WITH ANYONE!!! YOU COULD'VE EVEN DONE IT BY YOURSELF!!!" Imamura yelled.
"BUT IT WASN'T ANYONE ELSE!!! IT WAS YOU!!!" Taguchi snapped back.
"WHY DO YOU EVEN CARE!? WHY DOES IT MATTER IF IT WAS ME WHO DID IT!?" She screamed back.
"BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!!!" He blurted out. Everything went silent. Imamura stared at him in horror.
"W- what?" She stuttered. Covering her mouth with her hands. Taguchi chuckled slightly.
"Jeez, that was easier to say than I thought it would be." He commented, a sly smirk on his face.
"Taguchi, I- I... I can't... I... I don't... you can't just..." Imamura started, unable to speak properly.
"If you don't like me back, that's okay. I just want to let you know, that you're special to a lot of people. And you've changed so many lives. I've probably done the same. But not in a good way." Taguchi said.
"I- I, I just, I've changed lives badly. It's never been for good! And it was never my intention in the first place!" Imamura replied.
"But do you like me?" Taguchi responded.
"IT'S NOT ABOUT THAT!!! TAGUCHI, YOU KNOW WHY I STARTED HANGING OUT WITH YOU!? YOU WANT TO KNOW THE REAL REASON!?" Imamura yelled.
Imamura stopped telling the story. She seemed hesitant to continue. Like something was there, stopping her from opening her mouth to speak. She took a deep breath. She continued.
"Because I wanted to pretend like I was important. That maybe if someone would be my friend, then I could be better than them. To prove that I wasn't a failure of a person." Imamura replied. Taguchi smiled.
"Really?" Taguchi asked. Imamura nodded. He stared at her for a few moments. "Well, I guess I'm the fool huh?" Imamura glared.
"Yeah. I guess you are." She replied. "So, you'll leave now?" Taguchi chuckled.
"I'm too stubborn for that." Taguchi replied. He paused for a moment, staring at her. "You know what. I will. I just want to know... do you like me back?" He asked. Imamura stared at him, her heart slightly pumping out of her chest.
"Yeah. I do. I want to be with you but..." Imamura looked down, folding her arms. "I'm just... not good enough for you..." Taguchi grinned.
"I'm literally a criminal. I think EVERYONE is to good for me." Taguchi chuckled. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to. I just wanted to know." Taguchi smirked. "So I can brag about it later~" he teased. Imamura's face turned a bright red.
"H- hey!" Imamura replied. "That's MY JOB!!!" Taguchi rolled his eyes, wincing in pain from his one eye. Imamura stared at him, tears welling up in her eyes.
"Sure thing Princess. I'll see you later." Taguchi said, turning around. Imamura paused for a moment, processing the situation. She needed to do something now. It was now or never. One of the best decisions of her life. But... it just so happened to be the worst.
"TAGUCHI I'M SORRY!!! PLEASE, DON'T GO!!! I WANT THIS TO WORK-" She started, standing up form the ground quickly. Suddenly, she fell back. Her broken high heel being her down fall. She screamed, watching her life flash before her eyes.
"IMAMURA!!!" He yelled, running to the edge of the hotel, looking over the edge in horror.
-flash back end-
"... I remember hearing something about hitting the ground with your legs so you wouldn't die. I don't remember how I got into that position, but I tried. And I did. And now..." Imamura stared at her legs, emotionlessly. "Now I'm never going to use them again." I stared at her, tears in my eyes.
"I'm so sorry that happened..." I replied. She didn't reply.
"... it's fine..." she said. No, it wasn't fine. She could barely even tell me what happened. The whole time she was recalling the events, she was shaking, and she kept having to pause to comprehend what happened. I don't even think she noticed. It was almost nighttime now that she'd finished the story.
"Imamura?" I started. She stared at me, no emotion in her face, and not even a hint of thought behind her eyes. I frowned. "I'm... just glad that you're alive." Imamura stared at me for a moment. She turned her head back to gaze at her legs, thinking to herself. After a couple of moments. She opened her mouth. But no sound was made. At least not for awhile.
"You should go... it's late." She replied. I stared at her, pleading with my eyes to let me stay.
"Imamura, please, I want to stay here with you. I want to help-" I started.
"GO!!!" She screamed at the top of her lungs, angrily staring at me. I jumped back from the shock, nearly falling out of my chair. She had clenched her fists, nearly shaking with anger. Her eyes were fierce and filled with unwavering rage. Her gaze was horrifying to stare into. She looked like she was going to kill me with just her eyes. As if she wanted to wish upon me the worst death imaginable. After a moment, she looked down at her hands. She stared at them for a moment, before taking a deep breath, losing the sudden anger from her face, replaced by a robotic, black stare. "Just go..."
"Um, yeah. W- we're gonna meet up tomorrow n- night in the dining room." I said. Imamura didn't reply.
I stood up, tears falling down my face. I quickly walked out of the room. I closed the door, staring at it. That look on her face was horrifying. It made me feel so small, and meek. I face palmed. I told her to meet us at the dining hall? How!? She can't use her legs! I paused for a moment. I'd forgotten to tell her about... how I murdered someone. I know she didn't ask if I was okay. But... that's normal. She's the one going through more trouble. I took a deep breath.
I just hope she'll be okay.
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