I picked up a red marker, drawing a big red X over Araigu's face. My hands shook as I did. Was I... scared? Araigu was the only thing that could get us out of here. And now... it was gone. No, stop! I shook my head violently back and forth.
I can't think like that. I have to get us out of here. No one else can help me. If we want to get out of here. I'd have to be the one to do it. I'm the cop. Everyone looks to ME for safety and security. And I've failed at every turn.
I took another photo, and made an X over it. This one was of Kajiwara. I sighed, frowning. I wanted to get to know him better. I really wished I had. He'd seemed really interesting. But I was never going to get a chance to talk to him. Especially right now. But... he seemed really nice. I frowned, placing the photo back.
I took one last photo off, pausing as I scanned it with my eyes. I sighed, crossing out the face. Taguchi seemed like an interesting character. He made a lot of trouble... but I don't know... he seemed to be changing. Anyone can change, right?
Well, if Hano Yoshiko can change, then anyone can change. Hano Yoshiko... I'd met her first when I broke into her house and arrested her with a bunch of other officers. And last I saw her... she was really nice and shy. How... is that even possible? I paused. Why are those memories so fuzzy? I don't remember them being so fuzzy before. But they just feel... fuzzy. I shook my head. I need to get back to what I was doing.
I put the photo back up. Wasn't Taguchi a criminal? Yeah, he had to be. He wouldn't have gotten a talent if Yuutsumi didn't see that he was currently in custody. I sighed, sitting back down at my chair.
I rested my elbows on my desk, tapping my head with one of my fingers. My parents had always said I had to do this right. I have to save everyone. That's why the raised me to be a police officer. The tapping got faster. I can already hear what they'll say if I get home.
"Kawata... you wanted this. You always said you wanted to be a cop when you were a kid. You always wanted to make us proud." They paused. The tapping became faster. "And yet you still failed. You failed us. I don't know why we ever hoped you'd be special. Because after this... I can't even believe you're our son. Don't bother coming home. You don't deserve our name."
The tapping became faster. It kept speeding up. Just faster and faster. It was starting to hurt my head. But I couldn't stop. They were so disappointed in me. I'm a failure. How am I even apart of the family!? I'm such a disgrace that I couldn't even protect fifteen other people! How am I the Ultimate Police Officer!? I DON'T DESERVE THIS TITLE!!! DO I EVEN WANT THIS TITLE!? I NEVER ASKED FOR THIS-
I snatched a pencil out of the pencil cup, and threw it at the picture frame on my nightstand. It knocked it off, the item falling to the ground and smashing the glass. I stared at the frame for a moment, before slowly getting up from my chair and picking it up. I wiped the broken glass that was still on the front of it. I frowned.
I hated this picture. It was the day I "graduated" from the police academy. Even though I wasn't olde enough, and definitely wasn't qualified. They still made me do it. I sighed, placing the picture frame face down on the nightstand. I'd have to pick up the glass later.
Suddenly, I heard something coming from my door, I spun around, my hand hovering over my taser. I stared for a long moment, before losing my tense posture. A... file? Slowly, I approached it, picking it up. I sniffed it once. Okay, it wasn't laced with any chemicals. I turned it over in my hands. There was a note on the back of it. "Hopefully, you can solve this, and save us all." It read. I glared at the note for a moment.
This wasn't a handwriting I recognized. To be fair, no one has really written anything yet. Or if they have, I don't remember it right now. But the wording on this note was just weird. This was probably some sort of joke. Or worse, a motive.
But, it doesn't hurt to open it up. I looked inside, an unimpressed frown spreading across my face. "Ha ha! You thought! - Ressa". I tossed the file over onto the desk, and sat back down. That was so pointless. Why did I even open that stupid file? I groaned, resting my head down on the desk. Okay, how was I gonna help us escape this place?
I paused, grabbing the file and sitting up. I opened it up again, taking the note off of the file, and turning it over. "Game room 1". I stared at it for a moment. That wasn't the same handwriting as the front of the note.
I got up from my seat, and headed towards the door. If game room 1 was where I needed to go, that's where I'd go. This could be a trap. But I can defend myself. I slowly creaked open the door, looking out at the hallway. I paused, closing the door a little more, but not all the way. I peaked out and stared down the hall.
Was that... Hirano? I sighed. I mean, I guess she could help me solve this whole thing. After all, I think we're still pretty good friends. I paused. Something was wrong. She seemed to be walking slower than usual, and her arms and shoulders were sluggish. She walked around the corner. Was she going somewhere? I paused, placing the file back down. I could deal with that later. Right now, I need to figure out why Hirano is acting so... differently? Is that the word to use? Never mind. It doesn't matter right now.
I walked down the hallway, peaking my head down the corner. I observed Hirano as she kept moving away. What was going on? I slowly followed her out of the building, making sure to be far away enough that she wouldn't notice. She approached the hospital, grabbing the door handle, and then stopping. She seemed to sway side to side. She fell to the ground.
"OH SHIT!!!" I blurted out, running over and kneeling down on the ground next to her. Her eyes were closed, and her skin was pale. Quickly, I checked her pulse. Okay, it was still there. I got up, quickly racing to the hospital door. I grabbed the handle, pulling as hard as I could. The door didn't open.
I turned back to Hirano. I started to hyperventilate, still trying my best to open the door. What if she'd been poisoned!? What if she was already dead by the time I got back to her!? What if... what if... oh god. I'm starting to panic. I can't think straight when I'm panicking. I took deep breaths, trying to calm myself down.
In a split second decision, I grabbed Hirano by her arms, and dragged her over to the fountain. I placed her down next to it, stuffing one of my hands into the water and splashing it over the side onto her face. She quickly sat up in shock, gasping for breath. Her face and chest were completely covered in water. I sighed in relief, sitting down on the ground next her.
"Are you okay Hirano?" I asked, taking deep breaths. My heart was still racing a million miles an hour, and I needed to calm myself down. I turned to Hirano. She was sobbing uncontrollably. Oh god was she in rough shape. I put a hand on her shoulder. "Hirano, what's wrong?" Suddenly, she wrapped her arms around me, taking me by complete surprise. I moved my eyes slowly back and forth, trying to think of the best solution to this. Slowly, I raised my hands and placed them around her, before taking one of my palms and patting her on the back.
"... I- I..." she stuttered, her body trembling. "I... killed... someone..." I froze, my eyes going wide.
"W... what?" I muttered, taking my arms away from her. She pulled her hands away, wrapping them around herself as she began to cry again. "D- did you kill someone here!?" I asked. She shook her head back and forth. I quickly looked around. "Hey, let's go somewhere else to talk about this." I said, helping her up off of the ground. We walked all the way over to the dining room, and sat down.
How are you supposed to react when a friend tells you they killed someone? Well, even though that's been our reality for the last couple of weeks, this one feels different. I was told they killed someone. It wasn't revealed. And now... what do I do? It wasn't anyone here... so I can't really do anything about it. But... it's still hard to deal with this kind of information! Especially since it's someone I'm so close to!? Why did she do it!? God, what is going on!? Why is my life like this right now!? We sat in silence for a little while, before Hirano began explaining herself, and handed me a piece of paper. I stared at the page as she slowly but surely stuttered her way through the story.
"... you... killed your bully?" I said, staring at Hirano with the paper in my hands. She was still shaking, her skin so pale it was almost see through. She managed to nod. "Does... anyone else know?" She stared at the ground.
"Yamazaki... knows..." she said.
"Did you tell him?" I asked. She shook her head. I looked back down at the piece of paper. "I mean Hirano... this seems more like self defense, or manslaughter. Maybe aggravated assault, but it's not really murder Hirano, so I think your good-"
"N- no... y- you don't understand..." she replied. I frowned sympathetically. It was still traumatic. Even if she hated that person, she still took their life. That realization is horrifying. Honestly, I don't know if I could live with myself if I'd killed someone by accident. "... I... I saw... h- her head split open... o- on the pavement" she stuttered, placing her hands on the table, as her body shook. She started to hyperventilate, tears streaming down her eyes. I paused.
"I'm here for you Hirano." I said, placing a hand on hers. She froze, staring with her mouth slightly open. I scratched my neck with my other hand. "I'm not going to be perfect. I'm going to make mistakes. But I'll always try my best. That I can promise." We sat in silence for a moment, as Hirano moved her hand around so that my palm was on hers. Tears weld up in her eyes, as she squeezed my hand, and rested her face on the table.
"... thank you..." she whispered. I smiled.
"It's no problem." I replied. We waited in silence for a couple of seconds, just letting all the feelings and thoughts sit in the room. "Hey, um, Hirano. Would you want to help me?" I asked. She raised her head up, and stared at me silently.
"... what is it?" She asked, wiping a couple of tears with her other hand. I took a deep breath.
"So uh, I'm going to check the game rooms to try and get us out of here. I'd really appreciate some help with this." I said. It would be good to have another pair of hands on this situation. And Hirano was one of the smartest people here. If anyone could help me, it would be her.
"No, y- you can't do that Kawata." She replied. I stared at her for a moment.
"What? Why?" I responded. She took off her glasses, rubbing them against her shirt.
"... I w- went to the game room. I got a note t- too. And it was just the motive." She said.
"... oh..." I replied. DAMMIT!!! I need to find a way for us to get out of here! If I can't do that... oh god... what's going to happen?
"... h- hey... Kawata..." she started. I snapped back to reality, looking to Hirano.
"Yeah?" I responded.
"I- I'm really glad that you helped out earlier..." she replied. I grinned.
"That's what friends are for." I said. She smiled, nodding. I paused for a moment.
"Hey... Hirano..." I began. She stared at me for a moment. "Thanks for being honest with me." I paused, taking a deep breath. "I've been acting really strangely these last few days. I don't really came over me recently. I'm happy that you're still able to talk with me about this kind of stuff. It was probably really tough for you to tell me any of that stuff. Especially since I'm a cop, and that might something like that might be a bit difficult to tell me." She stared at me for a second, before smiling, placing her other hand on top of mine.
"No, it wasn't hard for me at all." She said. "I trust you." I grinned.
"I'm glad." I replied. I paused for a moment. "Here, I still want to pay you back, you know?" I said. "I've been... really weird lately. You can ask me anything, and I'll answer it honestly." She paused for a minute, taking her hand away and placing it on her chin as she thought.
"Tell me something about your childhood." She asked.
"H- huh?" I blurted out.
"What?" She replied.
"Oh, no it's nothing. I- I just wasn't expecting that kind of question." I laughed for a moment. "I thought you were going to ask me if I was the traitor or the mastermind." She smiled worriedly.
"I mean, I didn't really think you'd answer that question honestly." She said.
"Ouch! Harsh!" I chuckled. She giggled.
"W- well, I also want to get to know you better. We haven't really had a normal conversation, you know?" She replied. I nodded.
"Uh, what do you want me to tell you?" I asked. She paused.
"How about you parents? I know that they're both police officers, and currently teach at a police academy. Is that a good place to start?" She said. I froze up. "W- what is it? Was that a bad question?"
"N- no! It just caught me by surprise..." I replied. I hated talking about them. But I did say I'd answer any questions she asked. But... why did it have to be such a hard one? Anything else would've been easier. "Well, I uh, I don't really like them very much..." I mumbled, scratching the back of my neck.
"O- oh! Y- you don't have to answer that question then! I can ask something else-" I started.
"No no! It's okay! I can talk about it!" I laughed nervously. "Um, I didn't really want to be a police officer. I mean, I don't really know what I wanted to be, but I knew I didn't want to be a cop. I guess they really wanted to have their son to be incorporated with all the police work, so they taught me the in's and outs of it. But it was never fun. I- I don't really think I've ever been happy living under their roof. There's a lot of things that I haven't done that other kids have. I haven't had a birthday party, I haven't opened a present, and a lot more stuff. And they never really seemed happy with the things I did accomplish, you know?" I paused, putting both of my hands on the table, staring down at them. "I just... want them to be proud of me... you know?" I looked up at Hirano, who had a sympathetic look on her face. I paused, touching my face. I had been crying?
"... I'm so sorry for you." She said. My eyes went wide.
"Oh shit! I'm worry!" I nervously placed a hand on the back of my neck. "Sorry, I didn't mean to be depressing. Let's change the topic, okay?"
"If you could do anything... what would you want to do?" Hirano asked. I paused for a moment, before my eyes lit up.
"I'd love to go camping! I've only been camping once when I was really really little, but I was so fun when I did it! I'd definitely want to go camping again!" I replied, enthusiastically jumping from my chair. I paused, before sitting down and rubbing the back of my head nervously. "Um, well, it would be nice I guess."
"O- oh! Th- that's nice. Um, I was asking what you actually want to do for a job." Hirano reiterated. I paused, laughing nervously.
"Oh, heh heh, my bad sorry." I responded. "Um, well, I'd probably..." I paused. My eyes widened. "I don't..." I put a hand on my chin, taking a moment to think. "... I don't know... what I want to do..."
God. I don't know what I want to do. I always just... wanted to live up to what my parents taught me. But I have no idea who I am. What's my favorite holiday? What are my hobbies? What am I going to do if I do get out of here? I'm just... going to go back to being a police officer. And I never liked doing police work.
I put both of my hands on my head. I'm never going to be good for anything else. I'll never know if I'm good or sports, or art, or acting. I'll never know if there was something I missed out on. Because I've only been working towards a life I didn't like.
... that doesn't mean anything. None of these people are going to get out of here if I don't do something. There are so many people who need help, and I'm not going to be there to save them if I don't continue to do police work. And if I don't do this... then my parents will throw me out. And I won't even be able to do anything. I won't be able to save anyone else. Everyone... is depending on me. What's one's happiness... compared to everyone's lives? Death is permanent. And that's multiple people. So... why not sacrifice my whole life... so they can have theirs?
"Kawata? I- is something wrong?" Hirano asked, adjusting her glasses. I stared at her for a moment.
"... hey... Hirano... what about you?" I started. "What about your family?" She paused for a moment, before readjusting her glasses again.
"W- well, my family has been good. My dad is really nice, and I have a baby brother at home." She paused for a moment. "My mom... isn't..." she paused. "My dad has been doing good, and so has my brother! At least... I hope they're okay... I..." she took a moment to think. "Haven't... seen them in a couple of weeks... so... I don't... know if they're okay." She said.
I closed my eyes, dropping my head down slightly. That settles it. I stood up from the chair, putting my hand out to Hirano.
"It was nice... talking with you." I stated. She stared at me for a moment, her eyes staring at me sympathetically. She put her palm in mine.
"Um, y- yeah. You too... b- but... Kawata... are you okay-" she started, before I ripped my hand away.
"Yeah, everything is going to be okay... I promise..." I said. Suddenly, the monitor in the room turned on.
"Hello everyone! It's me! Ressa!" Ressa said on the screen, chuckling to himself. Just here to let you know that the hospital has opened back up! And... that a special someone is waiting here for all of you!" He laughed again. "See you all later!" The monitor shut off. I stared at it for a minute, before dropping my head again.
"Hey... uh... Hirano?" I said. She didn't reply. "Tell everyone to meet me here tomorrow night... okay?"
"... o- okay?" She replied. I nodded, leaving the room. I wandered back to my room.
Hirano had a life to got back to. Everyone did. Every person had a life that was waiting for them. But some of them... would never return. And their life was left to shrivel out and die as well. I opened the door.
Society... is built on rules. If we didn't have rules, then everyone would be dying left and right. And that's the problem here. We don't have any rules to keep us from doing these horrible things. If we had different rules... then everyone would still be alive right now. I opened my closet.
Well, I can't go back on my mistakes. But... I can still learn from them right now. I thought, if I let everyone be free to do whatever they wanted, maybe they'd listen and choose not to kill. I was so naive. That kind of freedom is dangerous. And I'm not going to let that take the rest of us. I'm not going to be responsible for another person's death.
I stared up at the peaked cap in my closet. I was supposed to wear it, but I decided I didn't want to. I took it out of the closet, putting it on my head. Everyone is going to get out of here. I'm going to make sure of it.
Hirano, Otani, Arima, Yamazaki, Sugai, Imamura and I. We're all going to get out of this place. And if that means that we have to have more rules put in place... so be it. We're going to survive. Whether they like it or not.
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