The world was dark. Dreary and unmoving. Trapped in a box of unending nothingness. Not a sound. But it wasn't a dreadful feeling. It was a feeling of peace. Like the universe was taking me to some other place, that wasn't filled with hate. It was filled with an ecstasy I couldn't describe. If only the world were always like this. Peaceful. But that's okay. If things never went wrong, we'd never be able to appreciate moments like this.
Suddenly, a blaring sound entered my ears. My hand flopped around, until my hand landed on the alarm clock, ending the noise. I sat up, rubbing my eyes, before letting them scan the room. And suddenly, it caught my attention.
On the calendar on the other side of the room were a bunch of X's on certain days, and on today was a giant circle. My eyes lit up as the realization hit me. I quickly jumped out of bed.
"It's my first day at school!" I cheered. It might be strange to be excited for the first day of school, but this time it was special. Because I was going to Yuustumi! And well, it had always been my dream to go there.
Suddenly, I froze, grabbing onto my chest. An indescribable pain had hit my chest. I took deep breaths, trying to remain calm, until the pain disappeared a couple of seconds later. Quickly, I grabbed a bottle of pills off of the nightstand and threw two of them into my mouth. I took a gulp of water from a glass that sat next to the bottle. I swallowed both, before taking a deep breath.
The pain never went away. It was always there, but sometimes it was a lot more intense. It was actually starting to get worse. No no, that was just in my head. And besides, I wasn't going to let this ruin my day. Today was going to be one of the best days of my life.
I smiled to myself. Yeah, yeah! Today would be great. Nothing was going to stop me from having a good day. Well, if I didn't start getting ready it probably would. I laughed to myself, opening up my suitcase. I'd already folded all my clothes the day prior, so right now all I had to do was pack them all up.
I stuffed the clothes into the suitcase. It was mostly just the school uniforms, but I also packed some clothes I could wear to the store or go to the pool, or maybe even go to some fancy activities. I chuckled. I'd never been to any fancy parties in my entire life. It would probably be a lot of fun! With everything going on in my life, I'd kind of missed out on those things.
I zipped up my suitcase, and pulled my backpack over to me. I opened it up, taking some textbooks, notebooks, pens, and other school essentials inside. And then some personal items of my own. I grabbed a smaller bag, placing my prescriptions inside before stuffing them into the backpack. I tried zipping it up, struggling to get everything to stay inside. Finally, I managed to get everything inside.
I stood up, putting the backpack up and throwing it over my shoulder, nearly falling with it from how heavy it was. I chuckled to myself, pulling the suitcase up and placing it down. I took a deep breath, looking at the time. I smiled. I had about an hour to make it there. Suddenly, a loud buzz went off.
Oh, that was different. Usually I had to go over and get her. I laughed to myself a bit, dragging the suitcase with me as I headed downstairs. I walked over to the front door. I opened the door so quickly that I nearly fell over as I did. The person screamed, stumbling back.
"Oh fuck! I- I'm so sorry S̸̬͝x̶͓́b̵̔͜w̴͇̎j̷̽ͅr̷̬̽i̷͈̿e̵̙͋c̶͇͆ẙ̵ͅ!" She yelled.
"It's okay Furuya!" I laughed. "Jeez, I'm surprised you got to my house so early. Usually I have to go and wake YOU up!"
"Heh... y- yeah..." Furuya replied. "U- um, you ready to head out?" "I nodded.
"Wait, S̸̬͝x̶͓́b̵̔͜w̴͇̎j̷̽ͅr̷̬̽i̷͈̿e̵̙͋c̶͇͆ẙ̵ͅ!" My mom cried out, racing over to the door. "Are you sure you don't want me to drive you guys there?"
"No, it's okay mom." I said, smiling at her. She frowned.
"I don't want you to over exert yourself honey. You're still trying to recover..." she replied. I chuckled.
"It's gonna be okay mom. If I don't keep trying, then I won't ever get better, you know?" I responded. She sighed.
"I know... I'm just... worried. There aren't the best people in this neighborhood..." She said.
"D- don't worry! I- I'll protect them." Furuya replied.
"Yeah, you're probably stronger than me." I laughed. I turned back to my mom. "It's gonna be okay mom. I have to move on from this house." She nodded.
"I know..." she said. I pulled her into a hug.
"Don't worry... everything is going to be okay." I replied. We stayed there for a couple of moments, before waving goodbye as I walked out the door.
"Y- your mom is so nice." She said, smiling at me.
"I mean, you'd probably know since we've been friends since kindergarten." I laughed. She nodded. "Oh! Wait!" I dropped my backpack onto the floor, taking out a Polaroid camera.
"H- huh? W- what are you doing?" Furuya asked.
"We're going to Yuutsumi Furuya. We have to take a photo to commemorate it!" I said, pulling her over to me, holding the Polaroid in the air as if I was about to take a selfie. I pressed the button, a photo coming out the front of the camera. I took it out, handing it to Furuya.
"H- huh? Why the fuck are you g- giving this to me!?" Furuya asked in a panic. Her eyes went wide as she covered her mouth. "Sh- shit! I'm sorry!"
"It's okay Furuya." I laughed.
"B- but seriously, why are y- you giving it to me? I- I thought you were the o- one with a scrapbook..." She asked.
"Well, I want to make sure you have a photo of me and you that isn't from when we were younger!" I said. She smiled at me. "We should probably get going now. Don't want to be late!" I laughed. She nodded. We got off the front porch, dragging our suitcases behind us. We walked in a serene quiet, just listening to the things around us.
"Hey... S̸̬͝x̶͓́b̵̔͜w̴͇̎j̷̽ͅr̷̬̽i̷͈̿e̵̙͋c̶͇͆ẙ̵ͅ..." Furuya began.
"Yeah?" I replied. She sighed.
"D- do... you think I'm gonna be a- able to make new friends?" She asked. I looked at her, before bursting out into laughter. She frowned. "H- hey... I'm being serious..." I smiled at her.
"I know! I just think it's funny!" I replied.
"W- what's funny?" She responded. I frowned.
"Furuya, you don't have to ask me if I think you'll make friends or not, because I know for a fact that you will." I said. She stared at me with a blank expression. "I mean, what's not to love about you? You're sweet, and interesting, and pretty..."
"... y- you think I'm pretty?" She asked, seeming a bit embarrassed. I nodded.
"Yeah. I think you're really really pretty." I said, a wide grin on my face. She smiled.
"Y- you don't have to flatter me. I- I know I'm not all that-" she started.
"Nuh uh! What are we supposed to say?" I asked, teasingly. She sighed, smiling ever so slightly.
"I deserve compliments, because I am special." She said, as if she were repeating it.
"That's right!" I replied, patting her on the back. "All you've gotta do is work on your confidence, and then boom! You'll never have trouble making friends ever again!" She smiled.
"Y- you think so?" She replied. I nodded.
"I know so." I responded. "We can build your confidence up first if you want to. And I'll always be there for you if you need me." She giggled a little bit. I looked over, a bright smile on my face. "Furuya! We're here!" I said, racing over to the gate around the school. "Can you believe it Furuya!? This is it!" I cheered, racing back over to her. She smiled.
"I- it's almost really f- fucking hard to believe!" She said back.
"Let's do this Furuya!" I sang, starting to head back over to the entrance. Suddenly, I was grabbed by the wrist. I stopped in my tracks, before looking back over at her. "What's wrong?"
"O- oh, nothings wrong! I- I just..." she paused for a moment, taking a deep breath. "I- I wanna try and be on my own f- for the day. I- I want to try and m- make some friends on my own." A bright smile came across my face.
"That's really good Furuya! We can talk to each other in class, okay? I'm pretty sure we're in the same class group." I replied. She nodded.
"I- I'll go on ahead." She said, starting to walk towards the building.
"You've got this Furuya! Stay safe!" I called out.
"Y- you too S̸̬͝x̶͓́b̵̔͜w̴͇̎j̷̽ͅr̷̬̽i̷͈̿e̵̙͋c̶͇͆ẙ̵ͅ!" She said back, before racing off. I smiled, taking a deep breath and slowly approaching the front of the building. I took a deep breath.
All I can do is stand. Stand in front of this amazing school. Side by side with other elites such as myself. A school so great and memorable that everyone knows it's name.
-
I sat up. Where... was I!? This wasn't my room!? Oh god, I need to stop panicking. Think Furuya think! Was this Yuutsumi!? Fuck, did I pass out in the front entrance? Of course I did something so stupid on my first day! But... wait... if I passed out... wouldn't I be in the nurses office? Fuck, did I go somewhere stupid!? Did I get kidnapped!? What did I do!?
I took a deep breath, holding onto my head. Something felt... strange. My head... felt all fuzzy? Like, something was missing. I tried to think back to what I was doing. But... that memory was fuzzy. I remember someone... but... who were they?
Actually, they were in a lot of memories. But it was like they'd been manually removed from them. All I saw in them was a blank white space, that got fuzzy around the edges. But that didn't make any sense.
I took a deep breath. Okay, obviously, I was going insane. Right now... I just have to focus on finding a way out of here. Because that wasn't normal, right? No, it shouldn't be normal. I sighed. Why can't I just be normal?
So much was just missing that I couldn't even tell if I'd even had a life to begin with. But I remember my name... I remember my talent... I remember the school... but I don't remember a large chunk of things in my mind. I shook my head. Obviously I was just going crazy. Just focus on getting out of here.
-
"Fuck, how are we supposed to get back up!? Sugai left us down here!" Yamazaki said, pounding on the elevator door. "If only that fucking robot thing didn't leave us stranded down here..." I frowned.
"I just hope Sugai's doing alright after what happened..." Otani replied. Yamazaki rolled his eyes. I turned to Kawata, who was sitting up against the wall. Slowly, I approached him.
"Hey... Kawata... are you okay?" I asked, the image of Taguchi and Kajiwara still flashing in my head. Kawata didn't respond, he just stared at the floor. A dark shadow covered the upper half of his face, but I could tell he was intensely staring at the floor. I sighed. Something was definitely wrong, but, I shouldn't bother him right now. We'd been through a lot for these past couple... weeks?
Jeez, how long had we been trapped in here? It couldn't have been to long, because everything was happening so quickly. And I couldn't tell if it was going quickly because of the things happening, or because of just how badly I wanted to get out of this place. I sighed. Well, right now we had to focus on getting out of this trial room. And it looked like Yamazaki wasn't making any real progress on the elevator. I sighed, looking over at someone. I approached them, before sitting down.
"Hey Arima." I said, sitting down. He stared at the floor sadly.
"H- hey..." he started, before wiping a tear out of his eye.
"... is something wrong?" I asked. He sighed, resting his head back onto the wall.
"I just..." he paused. "Everything has become so terrifying..." I stared at him for a moment. "I'm just..." he looked at his hands. "I used to be brave..." he took a deep breath. "But after this whole k- killing game... everything is just so... scary..."
"... yeah... we've all changed a lot..." I said. He sighed, staring at the ground with bags under his eyes.
"... I wished none of this ever happened... it's not like everything was perfect before this... but I enjoyed not becoming paranoid every second..." Arima replied.
"... aren't you the Ultimate Daredevil?" I asked. He sighed, placing a hand on the side of his face as he nodded, covering the scar over his eye.
"Yeah... b- but that was before... now..." he looked at his hand, before dropping it to the floor. "I've become a coward..." he paused for a moment. "I still like doing stunts... but talking to people is a lot harder..." he said, a single tear falling down his cheek.
"... yeah... things have become a lot more tense... everything's..." I sighed, trying to calm myself down. "... changed for the worse..."
"It feels like... we've forgotten about all the people who died to get to where we are now..." Arima said. "And it's just..." he wrapped his arms around him, as if he were trying to shrivel into a little ball. "... horrifying that we can't face that these people are gone... and just... r- remember that they were apart of our l- lives..." I stared at him for a moment.
"I think... we've just been trying to return to some sort of normal-" I began.
"That's not an excuse..." he mumbled. He looked over at me, dropping his arms back down. "Th- they're still people. Who lost their lives. We should at least acknowledge that they were here. We cared about them... r- right? I know I did..." he took a deep breath. "I- I don't know... ignoring what's wrong... j- just makes it worse... you know?" I nodded.
"... who do you miss the most?" I asked.
"H- huh?" He replied, looking at me with a surprised expression.
"Who do you miss the most?" I repeated. He paused for a moment, looking at the ground.
"I- I missed them all... b- but..." he paused for a moment, scratching the back of his neck. "I- I was a lot closer to Morita and Shishido..."
"... what's your favorite memory with them?" I asked, smiling at him. Arima paused for a moment, looking back down at the ground.
"..." he thought for a moment, before smiling. "One time... Morita and I went to the library and climbed on top of the bookcases, and as we were climbing..." he started to chuckle to himself. "One of the books fell down and hit her in the face. It caught me so off guard that I made the shelves shake, and another one fell and hit her head again." He said, chuckling to himself, tears in his eyes. "And Shishido took the remote control and smashed it into the ground, not knowing how to use the controls, and ended up winning the game!" He chuckled. Then, the smile disappeared from his face. "Until... that night... when..." he said, tears appearing in his eyes. He took a deep breath, letting them run down his face. My eyes went wide.
"I- I'm really sorry Arima! I didn't mean to make you cry-" I replied. He shook his head, a smile appearing on his face.
"No... I needed this..." he said, chuckling as tears fell down his face, as he tried to control himself. He took deep breaths, as tears fell down his face. I suddenly became overwhelmed with emotions, tears welling up in my eyes.
I hadn't realized how much we'd forgotten about these people. Maybe we'd mention them in passing, but we never focused on it. We were so desperate to try and push towards the future, that we forgot the past people even existed. I paused for a moment.
I miss Furuya. We'd only talked for a little bit, but I felt close to her. We'd had a lot of nice chats, and we bonded over reading books together. Tears dripped down my cheeks. My mind ran through memories with every single one of them. All of these people who'd lost their lives to this killing game. No matter how small my interactions with them were, I have to treasure those moments. We sat there, crying silently for who knows how long. The silence spoke for itself.
And then, it all stopped, a look of peace coming across Arima's face. He looked to me, smiling. He took a deep breath.
"I'm thankful you came over to talk to me Hirano..." Arima said. "I... really needed this..." I smiled, nodding. My gaze turned to the room. Kawata hadn't moved from his spot, and it seemed like Yamazaki and Otani were having a conversation about the elevator. "... you've changed a lot Hirano..." Arima said.
"Huh?" I blurted out. He looked to me, smiling.
"When I first met you, you seemed really shy, and scared. B- but, now you don't really seem that scared. O- or, at least you don't who it." Arima chuckled, before looking at his hands, frowning. "... I- I've changed for the worse..." I paused for a moment.
"... we all go through things in our lives... and they can have different effects..." I said, taking a moment to think. Jeez... had I really changed that much? I'd wanted to change at Yuutsumi... but... I didn't want want it to be through this. "... and... I bet you just reacted differently to this kind of trauma..." Arima paused for a moment, looked at me with a smile. His eyes began to scan around the room, as he seemed lost in thought. "... are you okay?"
Arima stood up, a look of determination in his eyes. He continued to scan the room. I stood back up, staring at him as he started to walk around the room. It wasn't clear what he was doing from where I was standing, but he did seem to know what was going on. Honestly, I didn't even know if I knew anything anymore.
It was strange to think about, but what did I really know? It wasn't much, and what I did know was limited to what others knew. And more people knew information about what was going on. For example, the traitor or mastermind. Unless they had died. Jeez, did one of them die? I didn't think about that until now. And now I'm wondering if I'm not as smart because Yamazaki and Taguchi seemed to always know who the killer was without needing it to be discussed. Was I overthinking this..?
... probably...
Maybe it was time to take out those copies I'd made a long time ago. About the files of everyone here in this killing game. I'd put it off because I wasn't sure if it would really help, and we had bigger problems to deal with. But... maybe I should go back to focusing on trying to figure out information on all the other participants. Did... I really know any of them? I may know pieces of info... but how much of that was a lie?
I took a deep breath. Now wasn't the time to worry about all of this. We had to focus on getting out of the trial grounds. I paused, glancing over at the elevator. Everyone stuck down here had gathered around it and... it was open?
I quickly raced over, pushing into the group. I stared at the elevator. The thing was, that it wasn't the regular elevator. The actual elevator wasn't there. It was the elevators shaft. And in front of it, stood Arima with a selection of tools. I could recognize most of them from the shelves.
"What's going on?" I asked.
"Arima's going to climb the elevator shaft to bring the elevator back down for us..." Kawata said, bags under his eyes.
"Th- that's really dangerous... I don't think that's a really good idea..." I replied, looking at Arima with worry in my eyes.
"I- it's fine. Not the first time I've had to free myself from an elevator." Arima responded, smiling at me as he saluted. "Plus this seems kind of fun..." he mumbled. I looked to Yamazaki, who seemed to be staring up the hoist way.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
"Trying to calculate how fast Arima's gonna die from this..." Yamazaki said, a hand on his chin.
"... oh." Arima replied, his eyes wide.
"Arima, I really don't think we should do this. Let's just wait for Sugai to come and get us!" Otani suggested, a smile on his face.
"He's not going to come and get us." Yamazaki said, turning back around. Kawata glared at him, Yamazaki rolling his eyes in response.
"... what?" Otani replied, staring at him sadly.
"Sugai isn't going to come back for us. I bet he's probably crying in his room or something. And honestly, he probably wouldn't assume Ressa would leave us down here. Also, do you think that maniac is fucking reliable!? If anything, he probably thinks this is FUNNY!" Yamazaki claimed.
"Guys, I- it's gonna be okay. I even made myself a harness so everything is going to be okay-" Arima began.
"So, you're saying we should all die down here?" Kawata asked, cutting off Arima. Yamazaki stopped for a moment, before his eyes slowly lead to Kawata, glaring at him. He tuned his body to be right in front of him.
"Oh really? Yeah you'd fucking say that. If you can't tell, I'm not really your biggest enemy right now. So I'm gonna need you to shut the fuck up about me, and I'll shut the fuck up about you." Yamazaki replied, glaring at him. Kawata stood frozen for a moment, before turning towards him. Kawata stared for a moment, squinting at him for a moment.
"That's not the point." Kawata began. Yamazaki opened his mouth to speak, before being stopped by Kawata. "I don't like you. Not one bit. I don't trust you whatsoever. And I never will. But this is about the safety of our group. And you're the one who's making it hard for me, is that clear..." Kawata snapped. Yamazaki stared at him for a moment.
"So, I can see you're actually doing something of use now." Yamazaki knelt down a bit to be directly at Kawata's level. "How'd you manage that?" Ha asked. Kawata's hands turned into fists, him looking at the ground in anger. And suddenly, he grabbed Yamazaki's collar and pulled him close.
"I'm trying my fucking best, alright? Nobody's perfect..." Kawata grumbled. Otani quickly stepped in, pushing the two away from each other.
"Please stop you two. This isn't the time to fight. Everything's been really tense, and I understand the need to relieve stress, but this isn't the time, place, or best way to do it." Otani said, before a smile came across his face. "Oo! Maybe I could make some cupcakes and we could all sit at the table and talk it out." Otani said, clapping his hands together, beaming with happiness.
"... What?" Yamazaki said, glaring at Otani. Otani paused, his face softening.
"I like the idea. I think it'll be really helpful for us." I interjected, smiling at Otani, who smiled back at me.
"But how the fuck are you gonna make baked goods? We're kind of stuck in that red panda freaks dingy basement." Yamazaki replied, folding his arms. I paused for a moment, looking him directly in the eyes.
"Well obviously, he didn't mean right now. He meant when we get back up to the hotel." I responded. Yamazaki scoffed.
"Speaking of which, is Arima gonna climb up or are you all going to yell at me about how that's a 'bad idea', even though I wasn't even the one who thought of it?" Yamazaki asked.
"... wait..." Kawata started. "Where'd Arima go?" Kawata asked. Everyone turned to the front of the elevator, where he'd been for the whole conversation. But now, had disappeared from that spot. I rushed over to the elevator shaft, looking up. About 20 feet up the elevator shaft was Arima, climbing as if it were the easiest task he could've been asked to fulfill. I stared up in astonishment, unable to get a word out.
"ARIMA!!! PLEASE STAY SAFE!!!" Otani yelled up, the elevator shaft amplifying the sound with an echo.
Arima stopped moving for a moment, looking down and saluting to all of us, before continuing to climb. Everyone stared up for a moment, before I turned my eyes to Yamazaki. He had his hands in his pockets, and seemed to be staring at Arima with a tired, unimpressed expression. Yamazaki's gaze trailed down to mine, making direct eye contact.
"You better not be blaming this on me." Yamazaki said. "Whatever happens now isn't something I'm responsible for." I blinked.
"Oh, no that's not what I was thinking about." I replied. Yamazaki raised an eyebrow at me, skeptically glaring into my eyes. After a moment, he scoffed, looking back up the elevator shaft.
"He can easily die from this." Yamazaki commented.
"Yeah, that's why I didn't want him to do it." Kawata responded. Yamazaki rolled his eyes.
"I just hope he stays safe... I don't think I can deal with another loss right now..." Otani sniffled, wiping the tears from his eyes. I paused for a moment, before putting a hand on his shoulder, and smiling at him.
"Well... the thing is that there are many ways this could go down." Yamazaki said, looking down to his hands. "One, he could slip and fall, which would give us another Imamura situation. And in that case, we wouldn't be able to save him because we don't have a sacrifice card, nor a surgeon to save him. And we'd also be dead, because I don't think any of us know a better way to get up." Kawata glared at him, almost being set off by the word 'surgeon'. "Two, either Imamura, Sugai, or that stuffed animal will enter the elevator and come to get us. In that case, Arima would be still be in the shaft, and would get crushed by the elevator. Which, yet again, would leave him dead, but we'd be saved, so I guess that's a positive." Yamazaki shrugged his shoulders. "And three, Arima somehow manages to get up to the elevator, in which I have no idea how he'd get into it or even open the doors. Which could lead to the first two examples, or he could manage to get in and come back down to us, which is the best case. But I seriously doubt that would happen." Yamazaki said, turning to all of us. "Personally, I'm not in the mood to watch that little son of a bitch's blood get splattered around everywhere, so I'm gonna go and sit down." Yamazaki said, wandering off and sitting against the wall across the room.
"... I need to go sit down. Feel free to come and sit and talk with me if you need anything." Otani said, walking away and finding a place to sit down. I turned to Kawata. He'd already walked away.
What was going on? I didn't remember these people. At the beginning of all of this, there were 16 of us. And now... there's only... what, 7? And 4 of us were trapped down here. Technically 5, but one of them was currently trying to escape. But I don't remember everyone being like this. Especially Kawata. Jeez, I remember him being so bubbly and full of life. And he seemed so willing to have fun and help others.
I looked at him. His eyes had lost any spark or joy. Instead, staring soullessly at the ground, as if there was nothing but an empty shell. I sighed, I guess no one can truly stay the same. Even after all of this.
It was nice to know that Yamazaki was relatively the same. Well... not exactly. He was a lot more reserved at the beginning of all this, and overtime has become a lot more opinionated and... well, angry. But, the thing is, that may have been because he was forced to be around us a lot more than before, which was strange with the decline in people.
My gaze turned to Yamazaki. He seemed to have his eyes closed, almost peaceful but there was a hint of discomfort and confusion. After a moment, I realized something. His hand kept making the smallest movements. And from what I could tell, he seemed to be calculating, or maybe formulating some sort of plan. I stared at him for a moment. Had he changed that much? I didn't know him to well. It's kind of hard to tell actually, since we never really chatted outside of serious matters. I shook my head. Even if he had, I never would know, and I just have to live with that.
What about Otani? He's always been so sweet and kind. He'd never failed to try and smile, and get everyone to join him. He had such an infectious joy, that just being in the same room as him was a blessing.
I looked to him. He hadn't lost his kind, gentle soul. But now, surrounding him was a sorrowful aura. I could feel it from across the room. He seemed to upset, I couldn't help but tear up a bit. Hadn't he said that he wanted to try and stay happy to inspire everyone else to do the same? I bet if he was over here with us, he'd have the biggest smile. But... it would be fake. Had... all of his smiles been fake? Just to make us feel safe?
I covered my mouth, my eyes wide. Man... that was horrible. It made me feel sick that someone had to hide their true feelings to make sure the group feel at peace... was just horrible. Especially since it was Otani. But... did I really know that?
I paused for a moment, before putting my fist in the palm of my hand. I smiled. There's no way I'm going to leave things the way they are. I'm sick of feeling like I can't control my life. I'm tired of feeling like I'm a weak link. Ever since I got here, I've been terrified. I was scared that no one would like me. And then, I was scared for my life. I was scared that another situation would go down. That history would repeat itself.
I'm going to make a change right here and now. I took of my glasses, looking down at them. Tears fell from my eyes as I stared at them. But instead of being sorrowful, I felt rage. A pent up beast that was fighting to be set free, and had found a new way of going about finding its way out. I gripped onto my glasses, sniffling. I could feel my face getting hotter and hotter the more the feelings rushed out, but still managed to be contained. I wiped my tears with the back of my sleeve.
I put my glasses back on, taking a deep breath. I grabbed a hair tie out of my pocket, and tied my hair up into a loose, messy ponytail. I took a deep breath, feeling as if a weight had fallen off of my shoulders. Every bit of confidence I had in myself had been smashed into oblivion a long time ago, by evil people.
I felt the memories stab my heart. They would never go away. But if I can't get over what's happened to me, I'll never be able to appreciate the good things. I was pushed to the ground. But now, I'd gotten back to my feet. I want to make sure that everyone around me is okay. Even if it doesn't affect me in anyway. Those people that I'd known a long time ago, they didn't mean anything for the my future. I wasn't going to change immediately. All of that will still be here, no matter how hard I try. But now that I'm standing, I can walk. And maybe one day, I can run.
...
And be free.
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