The sky was bright, it almost felt as if it were mocking you with the way it glared into your eyes. Though, not even the bright sun seemed to bother you right now. Your eyes hardly seemed to register the bright light as you looked ahead to the horizon.
The world was quiet. Not a single chirp of a bird, not the sound of wind in your ears, not even the rustling of leaves. There was nothing.
Nothing but brown noise and the flashing of images in your head. They repeated over and over again, the sight of your sisters dead body that you killed with your own hand, the sight of the Leaf village having been destroyed, and the sight of that masked man making you a deal. They were a constant spiral, a spiral you fell deeper and deeper into.
You couldn't help but think to yourself; 'Am I going insane?'
You had never thought about this before, about being so far gone that all you could think about is what happened to the village, about your sister. The sister you killed with your own bare hands. Maybe you should have let her live, and she probably would have been had you not lost your own mind in the middle of that battle.
But now, there was no time for self-pity. You had other priorities than your own sorry ass.
Your sister was still dead. You didn't think that you were supposed to feel some sort of grief, especially when she was just an enemy you needed to kill or at least be rid of. But when you thought of it that way, it dragged you further into your thoughts.
Did she deserve to be killed? She had done bad things, she had done you wrong, but does that warrant death?
Does that deserve to be avenged, punished for what she did? Does that make up for it? Did she deserve to die?
It's like everything in your head is spinning out of control. It's dizzying, disorientating. Your body feels weightless and cold despite the heat and the sun. The thought of 'Madara' flashes through your mind again—you couldn't help but want to tear him apart too. You knew he'd taken advantage of your deteriorating mind and used it to get you on his side... Yet what could you do about it now? Madara was strong, more than capable of doing whatever he wanted to. You had nothing. Absolutely nothing. It was hard, sometimes, to keep yourself from going insane.
Madara made you wear an Akatsuki robe, though it didn't make you feel evil or vile or anything of the sort. But it did make you feel gross. Gross because you knew that your sister and father wore something like this before. It was gross and wrong because this is what a group of terrorists wore—and you were sure of it in that moment, you were a traitor. A traitor to the village you had grown up in, and now there was no way for you to return without punishment or scorn.
That thought alone nearly had you throwing up.
So you swallowed down the bile burning your throat as best you could, and tried to pretend it wasn't even there for your sake. You tried not to think about how the others would feel if they saw you here now, they would probably be disgusted. The look of betrayal and hurt—and none of them would understand that you did it for their sakes.
It was stupid. You couldn't save them from war, you couldn't save anyone you cared for.
And they certainly would never forgive you for this, even if you did survive. They'd leave. That's the lie you convinced yourself with in attempts to ease the drowning feeling of guilt.
You wanted to go home again so badly. Madara had trapped you in a moment of weakness, and you made the worse decision or your life. There was no going back from this, you ruined your own life and there was no fixing it. No matter what happened to you after this, whether you lived or died you would always have this regret. And nothing would change. No matter how much you wished you were in the Leaf village now.
You weren't sure how long you stood like that, staring blankly at the landscape and trying to clear your head. But the only thing that snapped you out of it was the apprentice Madara mentioned.
"Someone like you was the last person I expected to get placed on this team."
It wasn't even a day later that you were put on the same team as Madaras little helper. Not a day later since he replaced your eyes with your sisters. Maybe that's why your vision felt so cloudy.
"I can't say the same for you, Sasuke." You answered him, the despondent look on your face didn't throw him off like it would have for anyone else. He'd said once before—if there was anyone that could understand his type of pain, it would be you. It seemed time proved him well, the tired look in your eyes nearly reminded him of his own. Wistful and repentant, the same look he had after his confrontation with his brother.
Sasuke scoffed at your comment, looking away, "We couldn't be any different. Why'd you of all people land yourself a spot with Madara?"
He wasn't exactly wrong. You and Sasuke were polar opposites. While he held grudges and found satisfaction in revenge. In vengeance against those who were responsible for his clan being brutally murdered.
While he wanted to make others pay dearly, you...well, you had immediately regretted what you done. That wasn't to say Sasuke shared the same feeling of remorse. He felt it just as strongly as you did, yet instead of dwelling on it, he jumped from one goal to another.
That was a far cry from how you were. You could hardly think straight anymore, your mind has always been a muddled mess of ideas, but never goals.
Only one thing kept you grounded through your life. The need and want of a family. There were small moments in your life that made you think you'd found it, like with Might Guy—filling the role of a father you never truly had. You even had Wendy, for a short period of time she was that sister you needed. But she was gone now, too.
That subconscious want for a family amounted to nothing in the end. Which was another reason behind your boggled mind—maybe you had nothing. Or maybe that was a selfish thought. There had to be people who cared for you.
Shisui had always cared. But he wasn't here, you didn't know where he was. Lee and Neji too—they cared, you knew they did, yet there was a part of your messed up mind that was beginning to believe it was all fake.
So much has happened in so little time, that you didn't know what to believe anymore. You were completely blind-sided. "I don't know." Was your absentminded answer. "I don't really care either. We'll just get the eight tails, and we won't have to deal with each other anymore..." Thats what you hoped. After retrieving the eight tails as Madara had said, you hoped you'd never have to play buddy-buddy with Sasuke. It was the least you could hope for, because you knew you couldn't get away from Madara himself. As you spoke, he was after Naruto, another tailed beast you weren't aware was still alive, and the iron dragon.
You knew it because he said it himself. They were probably planning to mash all those tailed beasts together like they did with your dragons, all for more power in the war he planned to enact.
"We should get moving then." Sasuke commented. "We shouldn't waste any more time... And if you fall behind, none of us will wait for you." You watched as he went ahead of you, waiting for you to follow suit.
It took you a moment—a moment longer than you'd like to admit to gather yourself into following behind him. He had three different teammates. There was a brief introduction you had withtthem, and you already had an idea of what they were like.
There was Karin—she already disliked you for having known Sasuke before her. Even though you didn't tell her that, and you hardly even knew Sasuke back when you were children.
There was Jugo—the gentle giant type. You never cared for those kinds of people, and he didn't care for you either.
And there was Suigetsu—a bit more welcoming than the rest. If saying 'what a depressed looking chick' was welcoming, at least. He liked to pick fights from what you could tell. He tried picking a fight with that shark looking guy from the Akatsuki.
He didn't seem to care for anything besides getting the eight tails, so it was fine. His teammates were just fine. You didn't care about hospitality. Nor did you care about their attitudes towards you either—in fact, if any of them started something, you doubted they could end it. They didn't seem like much, other than Sasuke.
And he wasn't the type to get in your way unless you got in his.
That was what you told yourself, that was what you told yourself as you followed behind Sasuke silently. You knew Sasuke noticed your lack of response, and for a few brief moments, you wondered if he saw through you. Whether or not he knew about your inner turmoil. Seeing as he had been through a similar experience—you were almost certain he did.
But neither of you cared enough to pity each other.
"Don't fall behind, Sasuke doesn't like that." The grin on Suigetsu's face as he looked back at you was almost enough to tick you off, but you brushed it off as you jumped further ahead, landing on branches to pass by the white-haired idiot. Eventually, you all reached a clearing—you weren't sure when Sasuke got such a huge pet hawk, but it was probably the best part of him.
Climbing onto its back made you think back to your cat. Your annoying cat that always got away with doing stuff that did well to get you angry just because he was so cute. So, so cute. You'd rather watch your cat destroy what little you had in your apartment than watch the never-ending foggy mountains and valleys of the cloud village. Your destructive cat was the last thing you thought would ever make you feel homesick, but it did. And that poster he got for you... You missed that, too. You didn't care how flashy and exposed those girls on the poster were, you wished you were around longer to appreciate it with your cat there.
When you finally found the jinchuuriki of the eight tails beast, your temporary teammates experienced a quick humbling. Sasuke had begun by telling you to stand by—he had no grasp on your abilities, so if you were a total bust at fighting, you'd only get in the way. You didn't complain when he said so, actually. You stood a bit further behind Karin.
The first to attack was Suigetsu—starting a fight that wasn't surprising. You knew he would be the type to do something like that. His executioner blade he was so proud of was quickly tossed away. You knew that was an impressive feat. You had been in the mist village for two years, of course you heard of the seven swordsmen of the Leaf. It probably wasn't the sword that was weak in this moment though, it was the wielder.
"In all your crew, your brain cells are few..." That was a direct diss toward you and your temporary teammates. But it was entertaining, a nice distraction from the overbearing thoughts you were having only hours prior.
It was Jugo next. His flashy curse mark did little to help in battle, without so much as even a scratch, Killer Bee knocked him out. And didn't even manage to get Suigetsus blade back.
"This battle you initiated, but I'll leave you humiliated." He was pretty cool. Though, the losers you got stuck with didn't necessarily share the sentiment. Jugo was thrown back near somewhere around you, and you avoided him by taking a step back. You didn't spare him a second glance as you kept your eyes on Killer Bee. Suigetsu voiced his annoyance, but you were entertained.
"If you don't like it, Suigetsu. You can leave." Maybe Sasuke was also a fan of the art of rhymes and raps? It didn't sound like something he'd be into if you were being completely honest, but you weren'y going to be honest. "And I want to uncover the legitimacy of the Akatsukis promise. They're recruiting just about anyone these days... But that'll make it easier to use them for our favor."
"Fine. Let's just get this over with." Suigetsu grimaced. He sure had guts for someone who was just humbled hard. "Let's shut this pain in the ear up."
"Not to mention he's a complete joke!" Karin yelled in frustration, pushing up her glasses. "He's got no talent for rapping!" She fumed, steam quite literally came out of her nose.
"Hold on fool, no need to be cruel!" The Jinchuuriki defended himself.
"Yeah, it's actually kind of cool..." You added on quietly, a bead of sweat rolling down your cheek.
"That's the stuff! No need to be tough, I can see you're a diamond in the rough!" He pointed toward you—it was enough to almost make you smile, if he hadn't been charged by Sasuke the next second. His reactions were fast, as were Sasukes—it was almost difficult to keep up with all of it. You actually thought something intense was about to happen, but the enemy had taken out a notebook and began to write.
A sudden move like that reminded you of Lee. He was the type to pull out his notebook in the middle of a battle to write down Taijutsu moves that inspired him. Though, based off of his next verse, you doubted it was Taijutsu that inspired him.
He's feeling hella fine... And he wrote the fattest rhyme? Now you were curious what it was. "Now I'll play with you tools, you baby fools."
Well, you had made your decision to stand by. Suigetsu called out the obvious—being that this Jinchuuriki guy was skilled with swords. Though you weren't sure how any of you would miss it with the way he wielded all of those swords at the same time, even one in his mouth. Like a pirate... At least, it's how you assumed a pirate to be.
You didn't feel bad for standing away, not when the rest of Sasukes team was just watching too. Actually, they had stepped in when Killer Bee was supposed to land the finishing hit. Where as you stood and watched it all unfold. This Jinchuuriki was even cooler than Sasuke was. Not that you ever found Sasuke cool, though.
"You're just gonna stand there and watch?! What was the point of you joining us?!" Suigetsu looked over toward you—rather peeved that you hadn't done anything while they all got their asses handed to them.
"I was told to stand back. I'm not one to disobey." You shrugged. You knew damn well you were lying to yourself, you just didn't want to go through all the effort of helping a bunch of people you didn't care for. The connection you had with Sasuke had always been small—and now it was nonexistent. Still, maybe it wasn't smart to stand by and watch as Sasuke got his ass handed to him.
You were a Jinchuuriki too—and seeing as he had transformed into the eight tails completely, you were the only one that stood a chance, right? Though, after your confrontation with your sister, you doubted you had the mental capacity to do it.
'You're so annoying, just do it.' Kakuju spoke to you, 'Capture the Jinchuuriki yourself and get some brownie points.
"Good point. And next we'll go after your old Jinchuurikis friend, right? A little reunion for the two of them." You weren't sure what to expect, but you called for the one dragon you could actually trust. "How about it, Diaval?"
'Sounds good to me, I'll never miss a beat. I think his rhymes are neat.'
"That was horrible." You sighed to yourself before he did as you said for once—the fire dragon king himself manifested without deals or manipulation. You nearly smacked Suigetsu out of the way to replace his place in the water—interrupting his heroic actions.
"Another Jinchuuriki, yo! I've never seen someone quite like me, that's pretty sweet, but your heat will never knock me off my feet!" His rhymes seemed a lot stupider when it was a big beast saying it.
"You're no better, you'll soon be cheddar!" Diaval responded to him—you were nearly terrified that it sounded like your voice. "Ahhh, that was horrible, shut up Diaval!"
"Woah, this chick is pretty sick in the head, It fills me with dread! I won't sweat though, cause soon she'll be dead!"
"Well... I'll soon have your head!" Diaval answered—and it made you want to smack yourself over the head. He was so bad at this, and he was determined to keep up with them. "Shut up, already!"
"She's insane..." Suigetsu sweat dropped as Team Taka watched from a distance, he was fused with the water—it was his strong suit, and you had just kicked him aside to battle the eight tails instead. "She keeps talking to herself."
"Well, good thing she's on our side..." Karin mumbled, pushing up her glasses. She looked a bit nervous, "Her chakra... It's overwhelmingly strong. I thought the eight tails was strong—but she's on another league... And it's so hot..." She observed.
It was true—the chakra radiating from you was almost searing hot. Suigetsu could practically evaporate while he was in his water form, that's how hot it was. Though, he was sure your involvement just saved his ass big time. Not that he needed it, though.
"You keep saying these crazy things, I can't keep up with these mood swings, but those wicked wings tell me that you're the king!" The beast went on—you were lagging behind with his rhymes, he had a quick tongue, and you apparently had a slow mind. His tails went out for an attack, which now that you thought about it, they were pretty weird. He was supposed to be some sort of Ox, but he had tentacles for tails. It made sense, though—octopus had eight tentacles and he was the eight tails and he—
Oh, oops. He wasn't only attacking you, he was going for the other four as well. And you had dove it at the wrong time—right when Sasuke used his black flames. You never heard of such hot fire before. Well, most fires were hot, but not to you. The aching heat on your skin—or was is scales now—was excruciating. Out of pure instinct, Diaval ate the black flames.
...It wasn't as hot going down as it was when it was on your skin. And the boost in your chakra felt far more immense than any other fire had given you, not even when you ate Sasukes entire fireball back when you were Genin. Perhaps that's what happened when you ate an Uchihas special Jutsu, was Shisui capable of that type of Jutsu, too? You weren't sure, but it was impressive.
And it has gotten the Eight Tails, too. You felt bad, seeing him writhe and yell out in agony. The poor dude was just enjoying some training—and he wasn't supposed to be killed, right? So you took the opportunity to eat the black flames off of him, too.
'What? She managed to eat the black flames...' Sasuke was genuinely surprised. 'That's impossible. The amaterasus flames don't die out, any less get eaten.' He was on the teetering edge of anger, and being impressed. 'Karin has been caught by the black flames, but if [Firstname] tried to eat them off, she'd probably eat her entirely.' Sasuke had to re-activate his Sharingan and put the flames out himself. The eight tails had already been defeated—not without setbacks of course.
The group of you would turn in the eight tails, and that would be that. Perhaps you would all find the yang dragon next; but they were probably no hassle.
"You just did me a big favor, and that's something I'll savor!" Sasuke rose his head up once the man you were all supposed to take down was still up. You had eaten those flames away way to soon—not only was Sasuke out of Chakra, but Karin was as well. Jugo had been turned into a kid, and Suigetsu would evaporate if he got close to the fire dragon.
Begrudgingly, it was up to you. And Sasuke wouldn't hesitate to kill you if you messed it up.
...
Depressed? Just spit some bars