Requested by gxldenbutera
Since Billy was about the only other person I hung out with at school and he had now left Jane was the other person I would talk to. And while I did have friends they had their own lives I grew distant from. Therefore I wasn't present when they chose to hang out. Leaving me in the dark whenever they mentioned something new. Jane, on the other hand, I couldn't seem to get enough of as I spent almost every second of the day with her.
And as that thought left my mind I zoned back into reality. Walking to school as I walked out the door I noticed Billy at the front of my house. I didn't expect to see him considering he stopped showing up to class. And with that, he stopped walking me to school.
Nevertheless, the sight of him brought a smile to my face.
I approached him quickening my steps and reached his side. Interlocking my arm with his the sudden contact for him off balance and I laughed it off. "I didn't expect to see you today."
He had a quizzical look on his face as though my thoughts were unjustified. And they would have been if he had shown up like normal, but he hadn't. I raised my brows before he could say anything and make me regret my words. His face slackened as he looked down and muttered, "I've been busy lately."
I didn't want to hear the lie beneath his words but I could hear it. He was deceiving me as he had done before. But unlike the times before this one felt like a heartbreak about to happen.
But I had been wrong before.
Rather than questioning him I put on a smile and looked at him intently. He was avoiding my eyes as we walked and didn't say a word as I continue to look at him. "I've missed you, and I'm going to miss you more when I go off to college."
If I hadn't been paying attention I wouldn't have noticed the reaction that came with my words. The corner of his lips tugged slightly and I hid a smile.
"Where do you plan on going?" I shrugged knowing he had caught the movement as he stared at me. With the options that I had about college, I had no idea what to decide. "If you go to Queens with Jane I can go visit you."
I lower my head as I rolled my eyes. As if he wouldn't come to visit if I went anywhere else.
I kept that thought in mind because if I said it aloud he would only deny it. Even knowing we both know the truth. "I only have a few weeks and I can't decide."
"Do you want me to make it easier on you?" I didn't answer him for a while as we continued on our way to school. But even as he was met with silence he didn't push for an answer.
Not even when we had made it to the schoolhouse. And I was still coming up with a way to respond to him.
I could see Jane walking out of class and spot us. She had a mischievous smile on her face. Which I knew, from years of knowing her, was when she was up to no good. I looked back at Billy and said, "I'll tell you when I make up my mind."
Pressing a light kiss on his cheek I rushed past him and toward Jane without a word of goodbye. Taking a glance back at Billy he stood still as he shook his head confused.
I grabbed Jane by the arms before she could say anything. And thankfully she didn't utter a word as she balanced herself on her feet I dragged her away. "I was wondering where he was this morning."
"It was kind of him to walk me to school right?" I asked loosening my grip on her. I bit my lip as I distracted myself with thoughts of him. My mind confused me sometimes as it went back and forth questioning me on whether or not he liked me. But I was certain he did, although my overthinking didn't help. I looked at Jane as she looked at me incredulously. "I've been wondering why he stopped."
"He's been planning a surprise for you–" Her eyes widened as if she didn't expect the words to come out. It was almost like she had been the one to receive the news as I stood there with my mouth agape. So I had been wrong, and I was glad I was. "Oh, he's going to kill me."
"What is he planning?"
"I've already told you enough," she said as she held her hands up. It was almost like surrender but she would give in if I kept asking.
"You might as well tell me," I pleaded as we went inside. I immediately heard the loud voices of my peers as we continued to our desks. As Jane sat down I looked at her and narrowed my eyes, "I promise not to mention your slip up."
She was contemplating my words. But if she thought more on it she would know I wouldn't tell him a thing. It would crush his spirit, and that was the last thing I'd ever want.
"It's a surprise for getting into college. Although you're still undecided." The tone of her voice was familiar but I didn't think too much about it as my mind wandered to Billy. "You're lucky you have options just pick one and go, but I would prefer it if you went to Queen's."
There was a radiant smile on her face as she said this. She had moved the direction of the conversation. I would bring it up later she knew that but I did have to ponder and make a decision.
I chose to sit down as it helped me think. Weighing out the pros and cons I had made my decision. This was probably the only time I thought about it.
~~~
I had no choice but to follow Jane as I knew she served as a distraction. It was only a few days prior that she mentioned the surprise party Billy was making for me so I let her entertain me, seeming to forget that she let me in on the secret.
With a skip in her step, I rushed to keep waking beside her. It seemed like she was in a hurry to get somewhere. That somewhere being her house even if she was trying to make it look otherwise. "How long until they're done decorating?"
The realization dawned on her and she went into a fit of laughter. I furrowed my eyebrows confused as I looked at her, it didn't look like she would be stopping anytime soon. I grabbed her by the arms and took her somewhere we could sit. As she calmed down we sat down a distance away from her house. If anyone were to look outside they would probably see us. "I've been up all night I'm so tired."
That would explain her sanity slipping away. She laid her head on me as I brought my arm up to her hair. I couldn't see her but I could guess she had her eyes closed as she started humming. She abruptly stopped and turned her head to look at me. "What's going on with you?"
She let out a sigh as though she was ready to tell me her darkest secrets. "The reason Billy's doing this today is that he's not sure he'll be there when you go off to college."
That did confuse me but my questions had been answered in a matter of seconds. I watched as she pulled out the grass from below and I held her hand. It was always warm in contrast to mine. "I think I love him."
My words shocked her out of her sleepy state of mind. I straightened myself as I was taken aback at my admission.
I wasn't sure why I said it. Maybe the realization that we would be worlds apart. I would be off at college and we had yet to know when we would see each other next. I let out a sigh as a frown made its way to my face.
Jane was still looking at me, I could feel it. Maybe because she couldn't imagine anyone loving Billy romantically. Yet here I was. "I think you need to tell him before he leaves."
~~~
Needless to say, I should have carried out my plans to tell him but I didn't have the courage. I regretted it with every passing day. And Jane liked to remind me of it at any given chance. Just like she was doing now.
She had the tendency to speak for so long that people ignored her after a while. Not that I was one of those people. Even if I did suffer through her comments and topic of conversation. Her energy was enough to boost mine and that was what I needed as we made it to Queens.
Since my decision to attend with Jane I still had my doubts. Which was one of the reasons I kept everyone in the dark about it. But now that I was here everyone had known. But I had a feeling there was someone I had forgotten to tell. My schedule had been so busy and amid things, things flashed by in the blink of an eye.
As Jane continued speaking, and I knew she was as I watched her mouth move I looked at her carefully. I noticed how with every word her hand moved expressively. I brought my eyes to her own and she nodded at me for a response.
With situating ourselves in our rooms and everything my mind hadn't processed her words. She repeated herself as I stared at her blankly. "Are you nervous?"
She took my shaking hands in hers as I stared down at them. I hadn't even noticed it happening. Looking back up at her I took a breath and felt as she rubbed her thumb at the back of my hand. "I'm a little nervous, but excited. I can't wait until school resumes."
"I know it's not much of a secret but have you told Billy." I couldn't tell what she was talking about so I answered the question I knew would not result in long banter.
"I only made up my made after he left so I didn't get the chance to tell him that I chose to go here, remind me to write him a letter later."
If she had been listening that wasn't what it looked like.
"Do you want to tour the grounds?" I suggested as I watched her by the window seemingly in her world. But she had heard as she nodded her head in a heartbeat.
It almost scared me when she ran to me to leave the room.
I tried not to trip over my own feet as she held my hand firmly in hers. We made it outside as we toured the building. "I still can't believe we're here."
Our eyes caught sight of a group of boys. Hers lingered more than I thought was possible without a blink of an eye. We watched as the group of boys walked past us. Each glancing back at the two of us. "Boy am I glad I'm single."
She looked at me with a knowing look and I rolled my eyes at her. I knew what she had meanest but I was happy with her brother. Before I could respond I could feel a tap on my shoulder and turned around to see one of the boys standing there.
He was waiting patiently as he cleared his throat and gave me a kind smile. Jane nudged my side but I paid no mind to it and I returned a smile and watched as his cheeks flushed red. It was adorable and flattering to see the effect I had on him. It had been long since Billy reacted that way. Or it might have been because it had been long since I'd seen him. Too busy with business duties he could have easily left it to Prissy. We all knew she was the one with the brains regardless of what their father might have thought.
Lost in my thoughts I heard Jane clear her throat and I looked at her. She nodded at the boy and I brought my eyes back to him. He repeated himself a little bashfully as though the first time might have been too much for him to handle saying again. He introduced himself as he stood tall in a manner of confidence but his height added more to it. "I was wondering if you would like to get a cup of coffee sometime? I know a great cafe nearby."
I stammered on my words not knowing what to say. "As a date?" I had to be forward and ask and not jump to conclusions, he could have easily maybe wanted to be friends. Although his eyes revealed the truth. But instead of a shake of his head, he nodded. "I'm actually seeing someone."
His eyes widened in surprise and he shook it off easily gaining his composure back. I could hear Jane trying to hold back a laugh. It amazed me how she couldn't get the hint and leave. It was obvious our interaction was embarrassing enough for him. "How about as friends?"
There was a glint in his eye. Only as friends. "I would like that."
He left with a smile back at me and I waved him goodbye. "I'm jealous."
"No need to be I'll make sure to get the word out that you're single."
"Don't make me sound desperate."
"I'm your wingwoman of course I'm not going to make you sound desperate." She rolled her eyes at me but I could tell with her smile she didn't take offense.
~~~
Jane was worried and nervous. It was almost like she had been the one invited out. But she had no reason to be nervous. The worst thing that could happen was he wouldn't like her. She would be devastated of course but she had other options. Boys who wouldn't think twice about going out with her. She never saw them though, her mind only focused on Ethan to even think about another guy.
I let out a sigh as she sat on my bed discussing what I should mention about her. She was forcing everything on me like I would remember what to say. I let my eyes wander the room to distract myself from her voice.
Deciding I should get ready I stood up from her bed and headed to my closet. As I got ready she followed closely behind I had to be careful not to crash into her. I scanned through what I should wear, deciding on a dress I held it up for her to see and she nodded in approval. "Also make sure to mention–"
"I know what I'm doing Jane this isn't my first time setting someone up."
I glanced at her to see her nodding at my words. At least that had gotten her to go silent. As she took a seat back on my bed I began to change, every so often looking at Jane to see what she was doing. Only to find her looking up at the ceiling in thought.
Ignoring her estranged state I walked over to the window and peaked outside. It was nearly time and Ethan said he would wait for me outside. Just as I was going to close the curtain I could see Jane's parents climbing out of a carriage.
It was obvious Jane had no idea as she stared blankly up at the wall. Her head moved in my direction to see the expression on my face. I smiled at her and rushed out so she could follow behind. And like I thought she would she matched my pace as she walked at my side.
It was nearly time for me to meet Ethan anyway. But a detour to see the Andrews would be good for both of us. I couldn't remember the last time I saw them, it made me miss Billy.
Hearing Jane ask me questions from behind me I chose not to respond as we exited the building. They were still by the carriage and I could see Ethan walking our way. Looking at Jane I could see the shock on her face. A smile made its way to my face as she walked off without me. I guess there wouldn't be time since Ethan was already here.
I turned to look at him and saw that he had a skip in his step which made me laugh harder than I intended. To make matters worse he had heard and stopped before me with a look I couldn't decipher. But if I had to guess it would be a look of offense, playfully at that.
I raised my hands to fix his tie, a habit I had grown to do with Billy. He looked at me carefully and I knew I had to say something before I gave him any ideas. But before I could speak I heard someone clear their throat from behind me.
Looking around I saw Billy and instantly made my way over to him. He had his arms open for me to run into and I did just that. Pulling back I looked to see if this was real if he was actually here and he was. With a smile on both our faces, I took a step back and felt someone come to my side. "I thought I saw you."
Remembering Ethan I turned to look at him and saw a confused look on his face. "Ethan this is Billy, Billy this is Ethan."
I had expected a jealous Billy but was amazed to see he wasn't at all. Rather he had a smug look on his face for whatever reason it was. "I've heard a lot about you. You're Jane's brother right?"
"And Y/n's boyfriend." There it was.
"If you're worried about us you don't have to be–"
"No, I'm not worried." At that moment I was glad Jane had decided to intervene and Prissy was with her. At least together they had the sense to make Billy listen. "If it's alright with you I haven't seen my girlfriend in weeks."
"I actually have plans–" He didn't let me finish as he took my arm and led us somewhere we would not be disturbed. I tried to reason with him and defend Ethan. It wasn't like I was making myself available. We were only friends and I told him just that. "Not every boy is a threat to our relationship."
"I don't want to talk about it," he said with a heavy sigh as he leaned against the wall. I raked my fingers through my hair in frustration. The first time we see each other after a while and we're fighting.
"You never want to talk." He had closed his eyes and I rolled my own as I started to head back. But before I could he stepped in front of me. "I can tell you need some space do I'll give it to you."
He shook his head roughly with a laugh. "I need you. You don't know how stressful it's been without you. Wondering when I would see you next, I didn't even know you were enrolled here until a few minutes ago."
"I should have told you I know but a lot had been on my mind–"
"Like that guy," he suggested teasingly but I didn't appreciate it knowing he might have meant it.
"He's just a friend." I brought my hands up to his face, one making its way to his hair. He relaxed under my touch and I was more than happy he wasn't tense anymore. "You know I love you."
Considering I hadn't said those words to him he looked at me in surprise. I couldn't bear the weight of his eyes on me so I embraced him in a hug. I hadn't expected him to say it back, it was sudden but I needed him to know before he overthought everything about our relationship.
He took his hands and placed them on my waist as he pulled away. I looked down at the ground feeling warmth reach my cheeks. Taking a hand he lifted my face and our eyes met.
His eyes moved and lingered on my lips. Moving in slowly I could feel his lips graze my own. "I love you too."
Then he kissed me silencing all my thoughts at his response.