Indigo. A pain in my ass. Gorgeous. Infuriating. A Peach. Funny. Nosy. Blue.
The way my mind has constantly been looping these words over the last few weeks makes everything feel like torture.
Even when I don't want to be thinking about her, I am. Just my fucking luck.
I thought that maybe if we fucked once, I'd get her out of my system and everything would go back to normal but it seems as if the complete opposite has happened. It's hard to think about anything but her and it's been two weeks since Halloween. And that scares me. A lot.
I don't know what the fuck I was thinking throwing the Halloween party at Shark Bait, I don't even like the holidays. I especially hate Halloween.
I know Indigo thinks that we throw parties like this every year, but the truth is....we don't. I'm glad Zayn covered for me because she would have so many fucking questions like the nosy person she is and truthfully, I don't have any answers for her.
I don't know why I threw the party.
It was definitely fucking worth it though. The way her costume fit her body, clinging in just the right spots like it was made just for her had me salivating at the mere sight. Her bright pink hair and thigh high boots were just a bonus. She looked unreal.
I couldn't help the surge of emotions that went through me when I first laid eyes on her, my cock immediately hardened at first glance. I was happy she came because even though she promised Zayn that she would, I didn't know if she'd show up. Maybe she had better things to do.
Not everyone is alone like me on holidays.
I did, although, feel a little self-conscious under her stare. I knew I was in the Sharkboy costume, and as adamant as Zayn is, I didn't get grumpy about it. I just thought I should match with her, that's all. Plus, Zayn had a backup costume anyways, I didn't have one at all.
I can't explain how I felt when I watched her and Zayn interact, her hand around his waist as she smiled up at him. She looked so happy and there's no denying how gorgeous she looks when she smiles but a part of me, a very, very, small part, wished that it was me she was smiling at like that instead.
That was enough to make me walk away from them, not seeing any reason to be there any longer. They were in their own little world. But when I saw Zayn's office door open and then close shut behind them, I had to see what was happening. I didn't even think twice.
Opening the door, I was momentarily stunned and the image of her perched on Zayn's lap like that is permanently engraved in my brain. I don't know what came over me but there was no way in fucking hell that I was going to let anything happen between the two of them. At least not without me.
It was worth every second.
Zayn and I have encountered scenarios like this before, typically at bars or clubs, sometimes me initiating it and other times him. I wasn't uncomfortable when it happened between us and Indy and I know she wasn't either.
I made sure she felt safe.
Having sex with her was the last thing that I was expecting to happen between us that night, hell I was never expecting it to happen no matter how much I wanted it to. I couldn't do that, I still don't fully trust her and with how clingy she seems to get, it's the last thing that I need on my plate. But it happened. And fuck, it was everything.
I can't forget how she looked under me when I fucked her, or the way she was a whimpering mess as she sucked on Zayn's cock. There was just something about how fucking perfect she looked taking the both of us at the same time that has my cock hardening at just the thought of it alone.
I've never been blind to her beauty but fuck, she looked even prettier splayed out for me. For us.
If that wasn't enough, one of my favourite moments was when Zayn fucked her. She was pressed up against his body hugging him but I keep thinking about the way she didn't falter her eyes from my own, staring at me after I told her to keep looking.
Her wide eyes say everything there is to know about her.
I could perfectly read how desperate she was for the two of us, the need pooling in them. Other times, I can see most of her emotions through them too. She's like a picture book, you need to analyze her rather than read the words she puts out.
Maybe that's what makes me so compelled to want to know her, the real her. I know there's so much there, so much that none of us know and a part of me wants to believe that it's the reason why I haven't yet gotten rid of her.
Why I can't stop thinking about her.
I wish I could tell someone about this too, and by someone I mean Zayn. But I already know what he would say. His first response would be to laugh at me, then to tease me about the fact that some girl has this kind of hold over me. I've never let this happen.
Because of that, I've been avoiding working around her at Shark Bait. It isn't because I'm embarrassed or don't want to see her after what went down on Halloween. It's because I'm a fucking idiot. I don't like what I'm feeling towards her. I don't want to be thinking about her every second of the day.
Today though is the one day I've finally been able to move on from her. I have bigger matters taking over my mind and this time of the year is always the toughest for me. I wasn't even meant to come into work today at all. Zayn knew why and he was going to watch over the aquarium for me but I was getting restless at home.
I could only cry so much.
Even Reef was becoming bothered by my sulking and ended up retreating to his dog bed in the corner of the living room, far away from where I sat on the couch looking at pictures.
My mother loved to take pictures. Despite how rough we lived, she always made sure we had a camera on hand. Taking pictures of me brought her joy.
"Smile for me, amorzinho" she'd beg, knowing I hated being on camera. But, I'd smile nonetheless. I'd do anything for my mother. I did anything for my mother.
The realization that she's truly gone and I can never do anything for her anymore never gets easier. If anything, that pill becomes harder to swallow as time goes on. Especially on the anniversary.
They say it gets better over time but whoever said that was a massive fucking liar and I'd like nothing more than to drop kick them into a tank full of titan triggerfish. The fucking teeth on those guys are terrifying.
My mother was everything to me, and I know that I was everything to her. We both only had each other but that was enough for us.
She did everything she could for me, she tried her best to make sure that I was okay. She didn't know what was going on with Joseph and what he was making Zayn and I do. She thought we were just two kids that he took pity on so he let us do minor tasks around the aquarium like sweep the floors or feed the koi fish.
She didn't know that instead of preparing food for fish we were preparing fish for smuggling operations.
And she never found out. I couldn't destroy the scenario she had created in her mind, one that made her happy. I couldn't tell her that the person she thought was my saving grace was actually the person who destroyed whatever grace was left inside of me. I just couldn't break her fucking heart like that.
Thinking about it all now never gets easier. The pain never goes away, time feels stuck and I'm always reliving every moment that I had with her. The thought of her makes me emotional, and it's times like now that I'm grateful I live alone.
Even the toughest shells need to cry sometimes.
Most of my nights are spent in the lowly dim lit rooms of my apartment, with nothing to do and no one to see and even though I prefer it that way, some nights I just absolutely fucking hate it.
It's easier when I have Zayn with me but most of the time that's not possible, especially when I need someone at Shark Bait to be overseeing everything that goes on so I've come to adapt and suffer in the silence. This time though, the silence of my house and my overwhelming thoughts were drowning me.
So now I've found myself back at Shark Bait, hiding in the back and hanging out with my cowfish.
I don't have it in me to go to the jellyfish exhibit. My eyes already burn from the tears I've shed today and seeing her jellyfish float around would only do more harm than good right now.
"You little guys better love your mama, alright?" I whisper to the baby cowfish, grinning as I watch them swim behind their mum.
Even saying those words has me choking up and I realize that maybe coming here wasn't such a great idea. Everything here is a reminder of her too, of what I had and now what I've lost.
I just miss my mother. I miss her calling me amorzinho every single day. I miss hearing her complain about the soil under her nails. I miss curling up against her on the couch and watching whatever random movie was on the one channel of cable we had. I miss her laugh. I miss the feeling of her fingers squeezing my cheeks.
I just miss my mum.
I know Zayn misses her too. She took him under her wing and she became the most important woman in his life. Zayn had no one but us.
He always told me he never needed anyone else either. My mum loved having him around and she never once had anything bad to say about him ever. That's how she was, she always saw the good in people.
Zayn was the homeless kid who hung around the aquarium, and at first I never talked to him despite sharing a glance with him everyday before I walked inside to see my fish.
I didn't have the nicest clothes or anything as a kid, but Zayn barely had any clothes to begin with. Every time I saw him, he was wearing the same tattered blue sweater and gym shorts, no shoes, just socks. I knew something wasn't right. I couldn't figure out where his parents were or why he was always around the aquarium, but I was too scared to ask him. I was just a kid as well.
One afternoon when my mum went to work and I walked to Oceanário de Lisboa, I saw Zayn around the corner sleeping. I had nothing on me except for a tulip in my hand that my mum had given me before sending me out the door, so with cautious steps, I silently approached a sleeping Zayn and left the flower beside him. It wasn't much, but it was something.
That night I went home and told my mum about the 'strange boy who sleeps at the aquarium'. She encouraged me to be friendly — like she always did — and to invite him into Oceanário de Lisboa the next day with me. My mother had the kindest soul and for a while I was just like her - kind to everyone I encountered.
Joseph beat that out of me.
But before he could do that, I listened to my mother and spoke to Zayn. He knew very little English so I mainly stuck to Portuguese with him, holding my hand out to help him off the ground and bring him inside Oceanário de Lisboa, showing him all the fish and rhyming off all the facts I knew.
We've been as thick as thieves ever since.
The day I invited Zayn to come back home with me for dinner and to meet my mother, you'd have thought he won the lottery. He couldn't remember the last time he had ever had a home cooked meal, if ever.
Stepping foot inside my house, you would have thought my mum and I lived in a fucking castle and not some shabby bungalow tucked away in the dimly lit corner of the street. He couldn't stop looking around at our old tattered furniture and crumbling walls, acting like they were made of gold.
"She....she cook? For you?" He had asked me in broken English, his voice full of awe when he saw a plate full of food in front of him. He looked at it like he'd never seen anything like it before.
My mum and I never had much, but the one thing she always made sure we had was food on the table.
"Come, querido. O Harry traz te mais quando acabares." She said, running a soothing hand over his head like she did to me every day.
He emptied the whole plate in five minutes.
I got him two more plates of food after that.
That was the start of Zayn and I's friendship. Mum welcomed him into our home and took care of him. We shared a bed as young kids until between the two of us, we saved up enough of Joseph's dirty money to buy another bed.
My mother is the best person I've ever known and if I become even a fraction of the person she was, I'll die happy.
That painful feeling that I don't ever get to see her again never gets easier. I thought it would, I thought that maybe just one day the tears would stop and life would move on, but no, life doesn't work like that. The loss of someone important leaves a permanent mark, one that you can never get rid of. One that consumes you whole, every second of every day.
And I suffer with that painful reminder every waking hour.
I like to think that maybe that's why I'm so attached to my fish. Humans are complex – they come into your life, they weasel their way into every crevice and every bone, love you, make you attached and then just like that, they're gone. At the end of the day, it all comes down to who you really have – just yourself.
But how can I have myself when I'm so lost?
I can't help but to just stare at the cowfish, finding comfort and peace in being here, at least more than being at home. I can't bear to suffer in my house by myself all night, not when I know it'll just make me crazy. But it seems as if peace and quiet is never possible, at least not when Indigo exists in my life.
"I knew I'd find you back here, shark boy."
I jump in my seat at the familiar warm voice before swivelling around in my stool, seeing Indigo standing a few feet back.
I thought I'd be a little irritated to see her, wanting to maintain distance, but my heart does a little flutter as I take a proper look at her. Weird.
She's got on the hair clips that I bought her, the neon orange ones. The pinkness of her hair has slowly faded over these last two weeks and I'm going to miss it. Bright colours suit her personality.
She also makes our ugly work shirts look good too. That both annoys and impresses me.
All I can think about now that I'm staring at her, is how she looks underneath her clothes. The secret tattoos she bared to me as I stripped her naked, the little freckles on her stomach as I kissed her belly button ring. All of it has been embedded in my brain, not leaving any time soon.
I catch the smile on her lips as she takes in the cowfish over my shoulder before she moves a bit closer to me, eliminating the distance.
"They're cute," she laughs as she nods towards them. The bright yellow colour of my little guys probably appeals to her.
I should have gotten her yellow hair clips too. Fuck.
"Their lips always look puckered for a kiss," she continues with a quiet giggle, coming to stand beside me. Her body heat warms the side of my own and my hand itches to reach out and touch her, to pull her closer and inhale that smell of hers I've come to enjoy.
Peonies and pomegranates.
"They're cute little fuckers," I comment, grinning for a second when I hear Indigo hum in agreement. Silently, she stands beside my seated self for a moment, admiring my cowfish.
It's only when I look down at her hand to see her security bracelet that it clicks. "How'd you get in here?" I ask her.
She holds her wrist up and dangles her security bracelet with the pretty blue gem in it. "Zayn updated it to give me more access around here seeing as I've become a bit more than a regular employee these past few weeks."
The thought of her being able to come into this room unsettles me. Mainly because it gives her access to my cowfish and Zayn's seahorses. It's true that she is one of us now, but I just simply don't trust fucking anyone around my fish. Only Zayn.
I'm irritated that Zayn didn't talk to me about it either but I don't blame him. I haven't really been present the way I usually am over these last few days so I get it. I do need to ask him about this though. I know he trusts her and sees her as a friend but we can never be too careful.
With this thought in mind, I give her a glance before I get up and walk out of the room knowing she'll follow me. The sound of her quick footsteps behind me settles the tightness in my chest and I'm quick to get us far away from my cowfish.
As we begin to walk through Shark Bait, she aligns herself to walk beside me. "So, what did you want?" I ask.
I take note of the passion flowers in the vases on the front counter, smiling to myself as I welcome the pain. Indigo doesn't give the flowers a glance before answering. "It's been a while. The last time I really saw you was Halloween and I just....wanted to see how you are."
I guide us towards The Lookout and I immediately feel calmness wash over me as I lean against the railing and peer down at the open tank. Indigo comes up beside me, our shoulders brushing.
"I'm fine."
I think I'm the furthest from fine but she doesn't need to know that.
An abrupt laugh tumbles out past Indigo's lips, catching the attention of a few customers milling around. My lips curl in as her cheeks redden from the sudden attention.
"You do know that saying 'I'm fine' means the complete opposite, right? You can do better than that."
I can only shrug my shoulders. I'm not willing to elaborate.
"I'm fine, Blue."
Her gaze sears into the side of my face but I refuse to look over at her, instead focusing my eyes on the sea turtle which swims up near the surface.
"C'mon now," she playfully nudges my shoulder, "You don't expect me, Peach, to be okay with an answer like that." She stays silent for a moment, waiting for me to spill my fucking guts or some shit. She's mistaken if she thinks I'm about to confide in her.
"What happened, Zayn made fun of your fish again? Or was it that you watched Finding Nemo and realized just how similar you and Gill are? No, wait, some kid was tapping on the glass in the jellyfish exhibit and you lo—"
The mention of my jellyfish has me turning to face her, my eyes narrowed and hands beginning to tremble. I came here to get away from my thoughts about mum for a bit yet here Indigo is, bringing them back to light.
"I said I'm fine, didn't I? Can't you just accept that as an answer and fuckin' stop? Fuck." I snap as I watch as she catches herself, her mouth immediately closing at my interruption.
I know she's just trying to be nice, I get it but I don't need that right now. I need some fucking peace and quiet. The last thing I need is her trying to pry her way into my shit again.
I should have just kicked her out of the back room. I shouldn't have led her out here.
I turn back to look in front of me moving my gaze away from hers and I feel bad, but I don't make any moves to fix it. I sense her shift beside me, her body moving away from me just slightly and a pang of disappointment rushes through me.
"A-Alright." She mumbles.
It's quiet between us again for a moment and I'm surprised she's still here. If I were her, I would have fucked off by now.
"Just because we fucked doesn't mean I have to tell you every fuckin' thing, alright? If you're gonna cling to someone, cling onto Zayn." My words leave a bitter taste on my tongue but I find myself spewing out more bullshit before I can stop. "You need to stop prying into shit. No one likes nosy fuckin' people and you think you'd learn after Portugal. I said I'm fine so fuckin' leave it, yeah?"
I almost immediately want to take my words back but it's too late now, what's done is done. I can't face her.
I can practically hear my mother yelling at me for what I've just done and it doesn't lessen the sting, it makes it worse. I feel like I've just failed her on the worst possible day.
I needed someone to be an outlet and Indigo has practically given me just that. I know it's fucking wrong and I know it's not a fucking excuse but fuck. I should have stayed home.
The sound of her sniffles catch my attention and my chest immediately tightens at the light sound. She tries to muffle it but it's useless.
Quickly, I sneak a glance over to see her eyes wet with unshed tears and I almost cave and apologize. I can hear my mum nagging me inside my head, scolding me for being a complete dick to Indigo. I see her hand come up to wipe her cheek. The realization that I've made her cry makes my stomach churn but I do nothing to fix what I've done.
"You know," she clears her throat once, "I get it, you don't like me and I might be p-pushy sometimes but you don't have to be an outright ass, I didn't deserve that. I just wanted to know if you were okay and if you don't want to s-share with me, that's fine, but there are other ways to go about it. What you just said was completely unwarranted."
She thinks I don't like her?
Her words spiral through my head but I still refuse to look at her. I know she's right, I know that she didn't mean any harm by her words but at this moment, none of that matters to me.
I only grunt, ignoring her presence beside me and hope that she gets the hint. It turns out that it actually works and she hesitates for a moment before letting out a deep sigh and walking away.
"Bye, Boss."
I still don't look at her as I hear her footsteps get further and further away until I can't hear them anymore.
Fucking finally.
Throwing my head up to face the ceiling, I groan out before rubbing my hands over my face. The 'Boss' stung more than I'd like to admit.
How can someone make me feel so shitty for talking to them like that?
I try to forget about the way her face looked as she stared at me and her words that she spoke to me, focusing my attention back towards the fish. It works for a while, and before I know it, any thoughts of Indigo are in the back of my mind, being replaced with torturous memories of my mum that just linger in my brain.
I probably stay there for a few hours, and surprisingly, no one comes to bother me, not even Zayn.
The main lights flicker off, telling me that Shark Bait has closed to the general public now. With this advantage, I force myself to head towards the jellyfish exhibit. Torturing myself. I said I was going to avoid this area as a whole today, but the temptation is too strong now.
As soon as I come across the neon blue tanks, I crumble.
My body slumps against the wall and I slide down until I hit the floor, my legs bunched up against my chest as I silently cry.
The neon pink jellyfish float around the tank as I let myself feel it all. All the hurt, all the pain and all the unfairness unleashes itself within me. And I welcome it, wholeheartedly.
"I m-miss you mum," I whisper to the jellyfish, pretending they're her. "Sinto falta da tua voz, mas acho que tenho mais saudades do teu riso. Sinto falta da maneira que me abraçavas. Sinto falta da tua comida. Sinto falta do teu amor e carinho. Não sei como vou seguir em frente. Tenho tantas saudades tuas, mãe. Eu amo-te."
Speaking in my mother-tongue always makes me feel closer to her. She always had the strongest accent, mixed with her faint British one which left my accent to be a cluster-fuck of both.
She always loved it though. She said it made me special.
Using my cardigan sleeve to dry my wet cheeks, I continue to mumble Portuguese to the jellyfish and talk to them like they're my mum. Fucking pathetic.
Even though I hate the idea of being alone, it's the only thing that gets me out of the weird funk I get into this time of year. I can't help it and I wish it didn't have to be this way, but it is and it has been for the last few years.
Losing track of time, I don't even realize how long I've been here. When I finally pull out my phone, I notice just how long I've stayed. "Holy fuck," I breathe out, and move to make my way out of Shark Bait. I've left Reef home alone long enough.
I quickly make my way out and onto my motorcycle before rushing home. During the whole ride home my mind wanders back to Indigo and I realize that maybe it isn't so easy to forget about her, no matter how hard I try.
I remember the first and only time she sat on this bike with me, and how she was so nervous, only to have loved it. It felt good to have someone new experience the thrill of it and before I realize it, I'm slightly grinning to myself, shaking my head as I think about it.
It sends another pang through my body and I don't know what it is, guilt maybe? I know the kind of person Indigo is, one who wants to just be there for everyone but how do I tell her that I'm the complete opposite? I don't make friends, or talk. Spilling out my feelings and letting someone be there for me is something I don't really do. That isn't me. I keep that all to myself, alone.
The thought of that makes a sad smile creep onto my lips and I pull up into the parking garage, putting the motorcycle in park before getting off. I stare at the helmet for a second, seeing Indigo's face in it before I slowly make my way up to my apartment.
All alone.
As soon as I open my door, I'm attacked by Reef who's wagging his tail and yapping excitedly. I can't help but to smile at how happy he is to see me. It feels nice to be missed so deeply.
"Hey Reefy boy," I whisper as I rub his head, giving the underside of his chin a good scratch before taking him outside for a quick pee. Once he finishes, we go back inside. Kicking my shoes off and throwing myself back onto the couch, I let out a big sigh.
Reef is quick to curl up on the couch beside me, resting his head on my thigh as my hand finds its way onto his back, stroking his soft fur.
My mum would have loved Reef.
I rest my head along the back of the couch, shutting my eyes. Flashes of Indigo at The Lookout today immediately begin to appear in my mind. I didn't mean to snap at her like that but today is arguably the worst fucking day of the year for me.
But she doesn't know that, Harry.
My hands drag down my face in frustration, hating that I did what I did. The image of her glossy eyes are burned into my brain, taunting me and reminding me of how badly I fucked up. If only she wasn't being a fucking Peach today we could have avoided the obvious tension that exists between us now.
With a grunt, I push myself up off the couch and feed Reef. As I get his food out I feel him nudge against my calf, whining like the big baby he is. "Relax boy," I whisper down at him, but it's useless when he sees me pick the bowl up off the counter.
He practically jumps me in excitement, making it difficult to walk over to his feeding pad. I barely have time to drop the bowl before he pounces on it, nose deep in his chicken kibble, tail wagging in glee. I can't help but to smile and stroke his back as he eats. Saving Reef was one of the best things I ever fucking did.
To keep myself busy, I refill my aquarium feeder. One of the sickest things I've done, and something that Zayn is extremely jealous of, is make the whole back wall of my living room into an aquarium. Top to bottom glass, full of my little guys happily swimming around.
I've got cowfish, jawfish, seahorses, clownfish, puffers, flagfin angelfish, mandarinfish, groupers and a fuck ton more. I've either ordered them from breeders or brought home some fish that we've saved at Shark Bait and don't have room for in the tanks there.
I go into my storage room and re-fill their automated feeder, gagging at the smell of chum. It never gets any better. The smell of dead fish and guts and shit will always smell fucking disgusting to me.
Regardless, I love doing all this. It seems like an obsession but it's not. It's comfort, it's familiarity, it's home.
My whole life is built around this and I'm proud of it, it's a reminder of where I am today and how much my life has changed and I would never do anything differently that would have led me astray from fish.
"We need to get you guys some more friends, huh?" I murmur out to them as I stare at my wall, a faint smile on my lips. I trail my finger across the glass and follow the fish before turning around and walking away to take a shower.
Just as I start to make my way to my room, a knock at my door has me weary but I approach it nonetheless. The gun tucked into the back of my jeans is suddenly hot against my skin. A look through my peephole only shows a paper bag on the ground, no person in sight.
Quickly, I whip my door open and snatch the bag, bringing it onto my dining room table. Reef follows but I banish him into the living room, just in case this bag isn't safe. "Reef, go to your bed." He listens.
With caution, I open the bag and look inside. The smell of homemade broccoli soup immediately overwhelms me, warming me from the inside out. I take out the warm container of food and find a note thrown into the bag.
'Harry,
I know today is terrible but that's no excuse to not fucking eat. Indigo was upset and worried about your sudden attitude change, so she insisted I check up on you and make sure that you're alright not knowing that I was going to do that anyways. Don't worry, I didn't tell her anything despite how persistent she was. You're right, she's a Peach.
Eat this, please. Indigo was frustrated that I wouldn't tell her anything and ended up flinging $20 in my face and telling me to get you your comfort food so that you would 'chill the fuck out', so that's exactly what I did. She's got a big heart Harry, we need to keep her safe.
I'll come over tonight and spend some time with you and Reef and my seahorses (assuming you haven't killed them yet).
Your mum would be proud of you, Harry, just like I am. Through thick and thin, you've got me. Always, brother.
Z.'
I don't even process the note fully before I'm whipping out my phone and shooting Zayn a text, telling him thank you and just how much I appreciate him. I have Indigo's number from her resumé but I've refrained from using it and will continue to do so. Once I break that barrier, there's no going back.
My heart does that thing again where it feels like it's sinking in my stomach, and I'm on high alert again. I'm not sick, so why does it keep doing that? Why does it beat erratically, begging to be let out and then sink to the depths of my body where it doesn't want to come out?
Whatever it is, I fucking hate it.
I push the feeling to the back of my head and with a small grin on my face, I grab the soup and a spoon and walk over to my aquarium, sliding down against the wall beside it to watch my fish swim as I eat. Reef splays himself on the hardwood floor by my feet, resting his head on my calves as he watches the fish with me.
I didn't even realize just how hungry I've been, my stomach grumbling as I eat, begging for more. I got so caught up in my thoughts at Shark Bait that now when I think about it, I've only just had my morning cup of coffee today.
Surrounded by my wall tank of little guys, Reef, a note, and food dropped off at my doorstep to make sure that I don't go to bed hungry tonight, I realize that people might actually care for me more than I think. Some days may be harder for me like today, but I'll always have people like Zayn there for me. Maybe even Indigo.
And for the first time in a long time, I don't feel so alone after all.
Author's Note: sad sharkrry = sad us :(
Next chapter is going to be fun, and you get to meet a new character!!!
Love you all & see you Thursday <3
A & S