Hey guys!
This is kind of an update you've all been curious about. The past has started to unravel and you'll know the entire thing bit by bit.
Don't forget to read the end statement of mine, there is a very tempting offer right there.
I want each of you to tell me what is your point of view about the past and who do you think is suffering more.
***
As soon as they broke their kiss to look at each other, a dire need to having each other right now flashed in their eyes.
They were far beyond the boundaries of the lies being spoken, the misconceptions, the moral behaviour that should be with an ex partner, guilt of cheating on somebody, nothing and no body.
He bent down to pick her up in his arms and carried her to the bed not breaking the eyelock even once.
As soon as they reached the bed the urgency was again visible in their actions.
Sidharth was the first to start undressing her as he took down her tshirt and left kisses all over her shoulder blade while continuing to undress her.
His name engraved on her chest was his intoxication, no matter how long he stared at that, he was never done.
His lips on her sweet spot of her neck had taken her to another world of ecstasy. She had removed his shirt and unbuttoned his pants.
She was now on the bed in his opened pants while she was there in her bra and pajama below. His hands went behind her back to the clasp of her bra and it popped open.
Before pulling it out as she loosened her arms for him to do so he looked into her eyes dead serious,
"Sana... This would be my last straw, iske baad mai khudko rok nahi paunga. You have a chance." He whispered in her eyes nibbling on her earlobe.
She didn't say anything for 5 seconds, she just stared into his eyes and kissed him again, this time softly like giving him an assurance, telling him what she wanted. That's it. He pulled open her bra and pounced urgently yet passionately over her, giving each of her mounds equal importance, one with his mouth while other with his hand. Her hand was tangled in his hair as she let him pleasure her immensely.
As he looked up, it was now her turn. She made him stand up as they pulled down their pants.
They took a whole moment long to acknowledge and absorb the fact that they were standing bare in front of each other and in a few minutes they'll become one.
He saw her slowly get down her on knees as she took his tool in her hands. She soon as her soft palms touched him a loud moan left his mouth and his hand reached her hair. He let her mouth do the job while Sidharth watched her do him. He closed his eyes enjoying the feeling.
He pulled her up in sometime as he was pretty much ready, they got down to bed again as they faced each other.
The passion in his eyes was momentarily changed with insecurity and pain.
Sana- Sid? Jaan?
Sid- Tu meri hai... You're only mine. Tujhpe sirf mera hakk hai...
He said in a broken voice loud enough for her to hear.
She now understood what was going on in his mind. He was thinking about all those years she has spent as a married woman to Aman.
Sana- I have never had any physical relationship with anyone after you.
She cupped his face lovingly and kissed his lips.
His eyes softened, with relief there cane in confusion.
Sana- You?
She closed her eyes as she asked that fearing what he might say
Sid- Not even in my dreams. It was always you.
He whispered in her ears and she shivered with the intensity.
Sana- Then why? She looked into his eyes broken.
Sid- Not now baby, not now.
With that he entered her and she moaned out his name loud. They had their night, filled with ecstasy, moans and pleasure.
They slept like that beside each other cuddled in each other's arms.
Shehnaaz woke up almost at 5 in the morning with the heavy rain sound and the little sun that came through.
She looked to her side to watch him sleep peacefully, her eyes flashed so many emotions at once.
He looked so relaxed and peaceful but damn could she say that for herself?
She made him cheat on his to be wife? He had commited to Anushka and she did this? She couldn't do this? She was now in the place a few years ago she was heart broken at?
She scrambled the bedsheet around her as she found her clothes and wore it quickly.
She ran back to her room tears streaming down her eyes. Shehnaaz was feeling a lot of things.
First of all she rushed to the bathroom to take a hot shower and release her pain if possible, she was feeling disgusted of herself for doing so. Today was the day Sidharth was going to announce his marriage and she was here trying to wreck his marriage?
As soon as she was done showering she packed few of her important stuff in her handbag and took the car keys with her.
It was 6 am now and nobody would be up before 7 so she quickly sneaked into the kids room to have a look at them and then rushed out of the house.
She drove faster than usual and as she covered a considerable distance far from the mansion she fished out her phone to leave a message to atleast one person she should have told.
# Listen, I am going to mumbai for two days, a very important work has popped up or something like that I would've said if it wasn't you. I am not in the right frame of mind, I need to have some time by myself, I will come back in a day or two and tell you all about it personally.
# Don't worry about me and let the others know that I had to leave.
She felt it was good enough and sent it.
She decides to call Aman and inform him about her coming to mumbai too.
# Hello?
He said in a sleepy groggy voice.
# Oh shit, I am so sorry sir mujhe dhyan hi nahi raha ki 6:30 baj rahe hai.
# *chuckling* Haa Shehnaaz thik hai,mai uth hi raha tha vaise bhi, hospital pohochna hai abhi toh.
# Umm sir, mind if I join you today?
# What?
# Mai Mumbai aarahi hu toh socha aaj hospital aake aapki bhi help kardu. Parr tu mumbai kyu aarahi hai? Teri toh leave hai aur abhi ek hafte mai shadi hai!
# Haa mai ek do din mai vapis chali jaungi. Please aajau.
# Well Mere liye toh acha hi hai, itne dino baad tujhe dekhunga toh mera din ban jayega.
# Aati hu sir.
She started driving again and looked like she would stop only when she reached there.
After waking up Kay recieved the message. After the initial shock she pretty much decided to help her friend through it and would tell people that she went for some work.
When asked on the dining table Kay explained that she had some urgent work so had to leave and would be back soon.
The colour that drained out of Sid's face was noticed by kay and now she knew what was it about. It was definitely about them.
Ayaan- Vaise Sidharth tujhe aaj koi announcement karni thi na?
Sid- Uhm haa parr aaj Shehnaaz nahi hai, woh aajaye tab karunga.
Annie- Hume toh bata de na.
Sid- Actually Shehnaaz ka hona bohot zaruri hai toh can't! Sorry.
He left the breakfast early.
He felt the warmth missing when he woke up and knew that Shehnaaz was gone, the night was absolutely magical but the morning after was not certainly. First she left the room and then he came to know she left the house for two days!
Right now all he could think of is when would he be able to hold her again and she was running from it! Maybe this is what is the difference between someone who's moved on and someone who didn't.
He was done with the aakh micholi and decided to do it his way! He anyway had to go to mumbai and free Shehnaaz's house from the mortgage dealer so he atleast had a reason.
He left hastily after telling Ayaan about his trip for that house mortgation.
"All the best bhai." He heard a voice from behind.
Sid- Kabir! All the best? Mai uska ghar chudvane jaa raha hu aur tu all the best bol raha hai?
Kabir- Tu uske liye jaaraha hota toh ye jaldbaazi nahi hoti, tu toh apni jaan ke liye jaaraha hai.
Yaha aa, baith. Aaraam se.
Sid sighed and sat beside him,
Sid- Kaise jaa sakti hai yaar woh? Ek baar mujhse baat kar leti.
Kabir- Mai ye nahi puchunga ki kal tumhare beech kya hua parr... Mujhe ye toh pata hai ki Shehnaaz ki vajah kya thi, parr teri? Tune kabhi usko kuch kyu nahi bola?
Sid- Chal aaj tujhe woh kahani sunata hu.
***
(From now this *** means change in scene from Sid to Sana and vice versa. Dont get confused between change of perspectives and pov)
When Shehnaaz reached home she was in desperate need of not wanting to be in the house alone so she went to the hospital so that maybe work would distract her.
As she entered the hospital a few of her colleagues were shocked but greeted her lovingly none the less.
She knocked on Dr. Aman's cabin and he looked up.
Aman- Tu itna jaldi aa bhi gayi? Pagal ladki.
He walked up to give a friendly hug but she flinched a bit which was unnoticed anyway.
Sana- Bass aagayi, kuch kaam bhi karleti hu ab.
Aman- Parr teri substitute pediatrician hai hospital mai, I mean I can give her a day off if you want.
Sana- Nahi nahi, it's her work, mai administration dekh leti hu tab tak, I'll be busy in there.
Aman- Admin ka cabin lele firr tu vaise bhi khali hai woh.
Sana- Done, thanks.
She went to the desk and flopped down on the seat.
She was having a bittersweet feeling after coming here, this was the routine atmosphere with phenol smell and syringes around but the atmosphere with all her friends and kids was too good to not be missed.
She opened a file to check up the supplies as to distract herself but got lost in thoughts instead.
She held her head in her hand as tears dropped down her face. What has she done? She couldn't believe her fate could be so cruel!
***
This is all from Sid, he is saying all this.
Mera aur Shehnaaz ka bohot bada jhagda hua tha, we were on broken ground. It was when she decided to continue her pregnancy.
Uska Vivaan ke baad koi bhi pregnancy carry out karna impossible tha. Uska uterus ek bacche ko hold karne ke liye bohot weak tha and as a doctor usse ye pata tha parr firr bhi usne apni jaan khatre mai dalke woh pregnancy continue karne ka decision liya.
I was broken, angry, clouded and I don't even know what not. Mai uski taraf dekhta bhi nahi tha... Baat karna toh durr ki baat hai.
Mai ghar aata tha, usse joh kuch lagta uss pregnancy ke liye sab deta tha, uske medicines dekhta tha, khana peena bhi saare physical needs dekhta tha parr emotional support? Nada!
Jab woh mere saath nahi thi tab pata chala ki sirf usko dekhna bhi kitni badi strength thi mere liye aur maine usse vahi strength nahi di jab she was fighting her own body! She was trying to fight for our child aur maine kuch nahi kiya.
Ussi samay mai Shreya se mila tha, you know what happened then... Shayad mujhe pehli baar hi Sana ko bata dena chahiye tha parr maine nahi bataya.
Shehnaaz as expected went through a miscarriage. Uss din hum dono roye the parr Shehnaaz ka guilt hi itna tha ki hum tab bhi baat nahi kar paye. She was silent, our house was silent, the children somehow understood us and they were silent too.
Do mahine mai we adopted Vihan and finally cheeze normalise hone lagi. We apologised, we cried, we mourned.
Usne apna baccha khone ka saara dukh Vihan ko pyaar karne mai baha diya, she got engrossed in him and I got pulled into Shreya's pregnancy. Raat raat ko jaana padta tha uske paas, Shehnaaz ko chodke.
Mujhe nahi laga ki woh time tha usse Shreya ke baare mai sach batane ka, meri dusri galti.
***
Sometimes Shehnaaz could only wonder what would've happened if what happened 5 years back, never did?
**Flashback**
(This flashback is basically her perspective but not in her pov, it's a third persons pov.)
Shehnaaz and Sidharth had just adopted Vihan after the demise of their unborn child. She was devastated but they accepted Vihan as their unborn.
She was on her miscarriage leave,
(Yes, India has a assigned leave for woman who go through miscarriage. India was the first country to do so for women mourning the loss of losing their babies.)
Vihan was already 3 months when they had adopted him and now was almost 5 months. She was too engrossed with herself, with the miscarriage and then Vihan to pay alot of attention to Sidharth.
They had not been on great terms during her pregnancy and just when it was starting to normalise, he seemed tensed. They were getting back slowly but how could they without having an entire breakdown and crying in each other's arms? You can't really get back until you sort out what the past.
Not that she totally forgot him or didn't give him time, just that she could somehow feel he was stressed and not up the mark but wasn't able to ask him. She was just trying to come up with plans to talk to him.
***
Sid- Shreya ko pata nahi tha ki Sana uske baare mai nahi janti. Instead I kept her away from worrying about Shehnaaz.
Kabir- Firr kya hua?
Sid- Firr... Ek din Sana met Shreya. The disaster.
***
Shehnaaz had decided that today was the day she was going to look into this.
She decided to prepare a hot meal and walk to the hospital and talk to him.
She first latched Vihan in the baby carrier while Vivaan, Navya and Kavya were at playschool and school respectively.
She was wandering around in the sabzi mandi shopping her way through where she accidentally bumped into someone.
Sana- Oh sorry... Shreya?
There stood a probably 7-8 month heavily pregnant Shreya in front of her. Shehnaaz!
Sana- Oh my god, you're pregnant shrey! Teri shadi kab hui? When did this... Oh god, congratulations!
She hugged Shreya and pulled her to the side.
Shreya was looking at her like she saw a ghost.
Sana- What month is it?
Shreya- 7th.
She said trembling.
Sana- That's great!
Shreya- Tumhe pata nahi tha mai pregnant hu? Sidharth didn't tell you?
Sana- Sidharth knew? No, actually he is really busy these days, raat raat ko bhi kaam aajata hai so I get it. Must have slipped his mind.
Shreya physically moved back two steps and held her head.
Shreya- Oh my god, what have I done?
Sana- Kya hua Shreya? Aise kyu behave kar rahi hai?
Shreya- Shehnaaz... This is...?
She said pointing towards vihan in her baby carrier.
Sana- This is vihan! Mera aur Sidharth ka beta, actually adopted.
Shreya- Adopted... So he is Vihan...?
Sana- Vihan Sidharth Shukla.
Sana said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
Shreya- You both accepted him as your own?
Sana- Woh humara hi hai Shreya, woh uske parents ka bad luck hai to lose a baby like this, all I have heard is, his father left him and his mother and later she left him after birth.
Shreya- So Sidharth accepted him?
Sana- Ofcourse Shreya, he is our kid, usse Sidharth ka hi naam lagega na.
Shreya - His father loves him? Do you love him like the other kids?
Sana- Yes Shreya, ofcourse na! Hum jitna pyaar Kavya, Navya aur Vivaan se karte hai utna hi pyaar woh isse bhi karte hai, we are his parents, he is their father.
Shreya- Their father loves them, ofcourse he will, they are his legitimate children! Kyu nahi pyaar karega and you love them, they have a fantastic mother, a strong mother!
Sana- Kya bol rahi hai Shreya?
Shreya- No... No! My baby won't have a father right? Yahi matlab hai na? Mere baby ka father nahi hoga, I am a horrible mother! No one will love my baby! You are a mother that a child deserves, not me! Mai deserve nahi karti isse! Mera baby mere saath kaise rahega, no one will love him! Your children are legitimate and mera baby toh... He is a mistake! He is a punishment, he is a... Burden! Yes! He is!
Shreya ran from there hysterically as she soon disappeared in front of Shehnaaz.
Shehnaaz tried to run behind her as she didn't look fine but due to the loud screaming and movement, Vihan had woken up and was crying so Shehnaaz had to stop and go back home.
She had to tell Sidharth about this. She came back home still in Shreya's thoughts.
***
Sid- Sana jab usse mili, mujhe pata nahi usne kya kaha, kya sunaya ki Shreya went bonkers! Sana ne usse kuch aisa kaha about Yug being a mistake, illegitimate and that she can't be a good mother.
I still don't entirely believe that Shehnaaz can do this.
Kabir- Usne Yug ko bina kisi sawaal ke accept kar liya toh tab woh ek pregnant aurat ko aisa kyu kahegi?
Sid- I didn't believe either Kabir, but Shreya ki halat dekhke it was difficult not to believe.
Shreya woh sab sunke vaha se bhaag aayi. She bumped somewhere, itne stress aur physical activity mai, her water broke. Premature labour.
Kabir- Aur?
Sid- Aur... Shreya ne sabse pehle mujhe call kiya, unfortunately mai pehli baar mai phone nahi utha paaya. She dialed our home, usse laga shayad mai gharpe hou.
Kabir- Toh vaha bhi kisine nahi uthaya?
Sid- I wish.
He said sighing sadly.
Shehnaaz picked up the call. Shreya ne apni situation explain ki aur Shehnaaz ne sab kuch sunke, phone rakh diya. She said nothing, nothing at all.
Na Sana ne mujhe contact karke bataya na khud gayi.
Kabir- What? Sana aisa... Nahi kar sakti?
Sid- I know. Parr I saw the call that Shreya did, legit call tha.
Kabir- Oh my god.
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So here the main ride of this story has started! The past has finally started to unravel in front of you all.
I reallyyyy can't wait to post the next part which should have been on Thursday but IF I GET ENOUGH COMMENTS ON THIS PART I'D MAYBEEEEE UPDATE AGAIN TODAY? MAYBE!
DOUBLE UPDATE OFFER😂
Don't forget to leave down your thoughts on the past.