Weeks went by, I've never felt more depressed in my life. I would try and cover up my sadness around Harry and our friends however, I know they could tell things weren't okay. I was at breakfast trying to force myself to eat. "Do you know who you're bringing to Slughorn's Christmas party yet?" Harry asked me. I sighed, I hadn't even thought about it. "Actually no, I forgot." He nodded. "Well maybe Hermione and I could help you find someone." I nodded. "Maybe," I wasn't sure if what I needed right now was to have "date" to this party but I'd be the only one without one and I already had a really pretty dress picked out. "Okay so Harry and I have already thought of someone," Hermione said as if she couldn't wait to get it out. "Who?" I asked. I could see Hermione looking at the Ravenclaw table. I was hoping she was looking at anyone but Marcus, me and him had not spoken much at all. However he was nice when he did see me and he never told anyone my secret about Draco. I looked to see who Hermione was looking at, she was looking at Michael Corner. "Michael?" I asked. She nodded. "Yes, I may or may have not find out he thinks your cute." She said. "Are you sure?" I asked. I don't think Michael would be a bad date however, I didn't feel ready to go on any kind of date. "Yes I'm sure, you should try and talk to him." Hermione added. I looked down at my still untouched breakfast. "Okay, I'll think about it." I said. Classes started in 5 minutes so everyone started leaving the great hall to head to class.
It was time for potions, I dreaded any class I had with Draco now and this was one of them. Oddly enough Michael was in this class also. I still wasn't sure if I was going to talk to him or not. I took a deep breath before waking into potions. I tried to avoid looking up at anyone so I acted like I was looking at my book while I walked in. I made my way to our table realizing Hermione obviously invited Michael over. Why were they like this, clearly Harry had something to do with this also. I just sat down and looked at my book. Ron was sitting with his Lavender so it was if Hermione was playing match maker as her distraction. Slughorn gave us a recipe to work on. Harry and Hermione were talking about something between themselves. "Hey," Michael said. "Hi," I said back, while looking at my book. "I'm sorry, I'm not trying to be awkward, um Hermione said I should talk to you," he was talking low so no one could hear us. There was talking between other tables so it wasn't really quite. Slughorn was letting us work in groups at our tables. "It's okay, she told me I should talk to you too," he let out a small laugh. "Well I guess we have no choice than?" I shrugged. "I guess not," I laughed too which actually felt good cause it wasn't forced for the first time in weeks. "Do you want help each other?" He pointed at the recipe I was reading. "Sure," I said "I'll get these," he walked away to go gather all the ingredients. He brought them back and we started mixing items together that we needed. After 30 minutes went by he actually had me talking a lot. "Fizzing Whizzbees are probably my least favorite candy," he said "I prefer to stay on the ground when eating my candy," he laughed. "I prefer anything chocolate," I said. "Typical girl," he added while laughing. We had finally finished brewing our potions and just had to wait on a few other students to finish. "We should hang out sometime after classes one day," he said. "You've been really fun to talk too," he added. "Yeah we can, it's been nice talking to you too," I said. Slughorn was finally making his way around to check everyone's potions. I turned to see who's potion he was checking, I instantly regretted it as I made eye contact with Draco. I felt my heart sink, as much as I wanted to hate him for hurting me so badly I couldn't. He turned away from my glaze, we always ended the day awkwardly since we still had to sit by each other in defense against the dark arts.
The rest of the classes and lunch went by smoothly, I even talked to Michael between classes. He seemed like he could be a really good friend. Now it was time for my least favorite class, defense against the dark arts. The awkward silence that came with this class now was not fun. You think we'd at least talk but no. He hadn't made to class yet so I sat down first moving my chair as far to the end as I could. There wasn't a lot of people in class yet. He already had the assignment up he wanted us to do so I got my book out to start looking over things. I could just feel Draco's presents walking in and I also could smell is cologne. He slowly pulled his chair out and sat down but never said a word. It was always so awkward and I hated it. My whole body was fighting the urge to turn towards him and hug him. I kept telling myself not to even look at him but I just couldn't anymore I just felt so much tension in the space that was between us. I finally turned towards him. "How have you been?" I felt stupid. What a stupid question even ask. "Um, I'm here so." That's all he said. I didn't even know what to respond. "Sorry," is all I said. I turned away and went back to doing my work. "You don't have to be sorry, you haven't done anything wrong." He said. "Well you make me feel like I have." I guess I felt a lot of anger towards him as well as hurt because those words basically just fell out of my mouth. "I know, but I promise you haven't. All of this is my fault." He said. We were having to whisper so other classmates didn't hear us. "Can we talk after class?" I asked. I didn't want to talk about these things in-front of everyone and I still felt hope for us. He sighed. "I don't know if that's the best idea..." I just turned around. I felt so angry after everything we've been through, he won't even give it a chance. "Whatever." I felt so angry. "Kaylee..." I cut him off. "Just leave me alone." He probably could tell how angry I was because he didn't say anything word the rest of the class. When class ended I gathered me thing, and walked out but Draco grabbed my bag abc pulled me back. "Let's go talk." He said. "No." I said with no hesitation. "Your mad?" He asked. "Obviously." I said. "Let's go talk, so you can tell me the same thing I don't want to hear?" I said. He sighed. "You asked me to talk," he said. "Well forget it, just leave me alone from now on and I mean it, at the point I don't even think I want to be your friend." He shook his head. "Your just angry you don't mean that," he said. "No, I mean it. I want to forget everything that's happened between us. If there was a way I'd do it. Goodbye Malfoy." I walked off before he had a chance to stop me. I could hear his foot steps behind me but I just walked faster. I felt tears coming down my face, I didn't want him to see this actually hurt me. I looked back and he had stopped following me, he had already turned around and went the opposite way.
I went to the library to work on homework after class. I had let myself get behind being so upset over Draco I really needed to catch up. Harry spotted me and came and sat next to me. "Hey," he said. "Hey," I said back. He was quite for a moment. "Are you... are you like okay?" He asked. "You haven't been yourself, I've been worried." He added. I just nodded, hearing him ask gave me this strong urge to cry. "Kaylee, please talk to me." Before I could even think of an excuse it all came out. The tears were flowing, and I couldn't even speak. "Kaylee, oh my," he just grabbed me and hugged me. "It's okay, you can talk to me. What is going on?" He continued to let me cry on his shoulder. I cried, for what seemed like forever. I finally got it together enough to be able to talk. "I don't even know how to talk to you about it." I finally let out. "What do you mean?" He asked. "It's boy troubles." I said. "Well what boy made you this upset?" He asked. I sighed. "I think it's best if I don't tell you because, your going to want to say something to them." He huffed. "Well yeah, they've obviously hurt you." He said. "It's okay, I want nothing to do with them anymore. But that's been my problem a stupid break up. I will be fine I promise." I wiped my face off. "Crying like that honestly made me feel a lot better I needed that." I said. "Well, I'm glad I could be some sort of help." Harry said. "But I still want to know." He added. I shook my head. "I honestly think it's best if you don't." He rolled his eyes. "I'll get it out of you, sooner or later." He said. "I hope that you do start getting back to yourself soon though." He added. "I will," I said. "I do have something you can help me with?" I asked. "What's that?" He showed him my pile of work. "I do need some help catching up on all this," his eyes widened, "have you not done any work all year?" He asked laughing. "It seems that way," I said laughing too. Harry didn't hesitate to help me and we stayed the rest of the evening until dinner getting some work done and talking about random things. I thought talking to Michael this morning made me feel better however, this right here is what I needed. I needed time with my brother more than I thought I did. Harry had left after we caught up with most of my work, I just wanted to finish the work I got today so I'd fully caught up. I was gathering my stuff when I heard some girls talking and I heard Draco's name so I got quite so I could listen. "Draco Malfoy actually willingly laid his head on your lap?" A girl asked. "Yes, I was just as shocked as you are, maybe he's finally coming around to realize we may just be, meant to be after all," I recognized the voice as soon as I heard it Pansy. "He didn't say anything?" Someone asked her. She was quite for a moment. "Not really, clearly he has something going on but trust me I am more than happy to comfort him through it." She let out a small laugh. "He even let me play with his hair, and we just sat there for a while. It was nice." She told them. I felt like my heart had just been tore out of my chest. Hearing this made me feel so many emotions at once. I felt like I couldn't breath. Him breaking up with me is one thing but this... so soon after. I thought our relationship was so much more than that. I guess it was not. I hurried out of the library, because I was crying so much at this point. I was so tired of crying but this hurt on a whole different level. My eyes were getting so blurry from tears I couldn't hardly see. I went down some halls just walking at this point. To get as far away from this library as I could. I finally sat in window because the hall was empty and just let the tears out. I felt so stupid, did he clearly have something for her all along? Did this last 2 years mean anything? I leaned my head against the window and watched the rain outside, I surprisingly still had tears coming out and I wasn't even sure how I could produce anymore tears at this point. I stayed in this spot for a while I didn't want to move. I didn't even want to be at Hogwarts right now and I loved this place. I looked in the window and recognize a reflection of someone and I couldn't believe it was the last person I wanted to see. Draco, it's like it took him a moment to realize it was me. "Kaylee, what are you doing?" I wouldn't even turn to look at him. "Go away." I said. Of course he didn't listen. He sat down across from me. "Look at me," he said. I wouldn't. "Why, you clearly don't care about me, go away." I said. He seemed to be getting frustrated. "I care about you, I will always care about you I hate seeing you like this." I didn't believe him. "You obviously don't care about me, you wouldn't be all cuddly with Pansy now would you?" He was quite for a moment. "What are you even talking about?" He said. "Don't act stupid, she just had to tell all her friends about it in the library and I just happened to be in there to hear the whole thing. She even talked about how you 2 may be meant to be after all." I felt so angry even repeating what she had said. "I guess nothing that happened between us was ever real, if you had some sort of feelings for her this whole time." I stood up. "Kaylee, it's not like that she's making it way deeper than it was." He said. "Oh really is she?" I said. "You laid on her lap and let her play with your hair apparently, I don't go around letting boys lay on me that way." I said. "I feel like the last 2 years have been a complete lie, I honestly don't even want to see you again." I said tears started back out. "Please stop," he tried to grab my hand but I threw his hand off. "Don't touch me, there isn't anything between us anymore clearly you've made your choice." I could tell those words hurt him. "And you know, I still loved you so much even after you told me the truth. I would have forgive you and been by your side no matter what." I left the conversation at that. I thought I was depressed before but this was completely different. I felt like my whole heart has been shattered. How was I even suppose to forgive him for this, my heart told me to so badly. Maybe he was telling the truth Pansy could be making it was more than it really was however it still hurt. Out of everyone he could have went too he went to her. What hurt the most is that he could have always came to me but he chose not too.