(TW: cutting, body dysmorphia, ED)
(Tommy 1st person point of view)
I walked up the stairs with Techno, and almost immediately when we hit the last step i heard them talking. I memorized the house as i walked by looking for an easy escape. We came along the farthest door from the stairs on the left. He opened the door and said "Welcome to your new room!" I gave him a nod as i'm not good with words. "You know if you wanna stay you might want to actually say some words." "Who say i wanna stay?" He sighed "Whatever just get set up in here and came down for lunch in an hour, Okay?" I nodded. He left and so i looked around.
It was very nice! It had a huge bed, I guessed it was a queen bed. It was well decorated so i guessed they were getting it ready for a guest. I sat down on the bed and was trying to think about everything that had happened today. Then the voices came back!
YOU ATE TO MUCH TODAY
FAT
UGLY
YOU DON'T DESERVE TO BE HERE
The only way I knew how he could shut them up was to cut. I was glad I had memorized the house, because I had seen a door cracked open with a bathroom inside! I opened the door slowly and went to the bathroom. I rummaged through the cabinets and drawers until I found it.
DO IT
YOUR TOO WEAK
I was in tears not loud one though because I couldn't let anyone know I was doing this. 1 cut. 2 cut. 3 cuts. 4 cuts on each arm, I felt better! I cleaned off the blade and my arms, then quickly went back to 'my' room and put on a hoodie I had packed. I hadn't realized that almost an hour had passed until I looked at a clock in the room. I was dreading lunch cause I knew I was just gonna through it up, but I went down anyways.
I was at the bottom of the stairs and I saw all of them talking at the island. I walked over and Wilbur smiled at me ans again I nodded. Phil said "We have pasta take a seat anywhere it will be ready in a few!" Wilbur and Techno smiled and took a seat on the long side of the table. I took a seat on the short side where no one could sit directly next to me. A couple minutes later Phil came in and gave us all some. I could barely look at it, but I ate it no matter what the voices were screaming at me.
Phil started a conversation and asked, "Where do you live Tommy?" I shrugged. How was I supposed to answer that? Oh i ran away from the orphanage cause I was sick of going from foster home to foster home! "Well where did you use to live?" "With my mom and dad in 'insert neighborhood name' ." Then Techno with his weirdly calm voice said "We saw you on the news we know you ran away from the orphanage." "Techno!" Phil whispered yelled. I just sat there confused on what to do. "Tommy?" Wilbur said "Mhm?" I asked. "We were discussing earlier, we would like to drive you back to the orphanage tomorrow and ask to foster you!" "Would you like that Tommy?" Phil asked. I was shocked I couldn't talk. The voices were screaming at me now.
DO IT MAYBE YOUR GET THE PAIN YOU DESERVE
YOU DON'T DESERVE HAPPINESS
THIS WILL BE LIKE ALL THE OTHER ONES DO IT
Tommy nodded just to please the voices. Wilbur was beaming with joy, I was guessing he was excited to make me trust them then send me back like some of the others did. "Well we will do that tomorrow, lets enjoy the rest of the day!" said Phil. We all walked our dishes to the sink and set them in. I ran up to 'my room' closed the door then went to the bathroom. I sat down next to the toilet and through up all that I could. I felt so tired I used all my strength to stand up and open the door.
When I got out of the bathroom I had noticed a desk and a pc, I must have missed it when walking in or I didn't care enough to try and notice it. I sat down in the chair and got into my minecraft account. I joined a server I had shared with my friend back at the orphanage he got adopted a couple years ago, but we still talked through minecraft when I could join that is. To my surprise he was on. I smiled and talked to him in chat. 'HI TUBBO!' 'TOMMY!' he typed back. We played for hours building, even though I was a shit builder. We also caught up on what was happening, he was happy with his family and so was I happy.
I told him I had to go because it was getting late. It was 10 at night I had skipped dinner because I didn't want to go through that painful process again. I opened the door and went down stairs. Wilbur was sitting on the couch on his phone, and Techno was reading a book. When I reached the bottom step Wilbur perked up and said, "Come over here sit with me!" he had a very happy voice I was questioning it and decided to not make anyone mad yet. I sat down on the couch it was so comfortable! Wilbur scooted closer to me and pulled me into him. I flinched at the sudden touch, but sank into it. It was a nice hug and I thought back to when my parents hugged me.
(FLASHBACK)
"OW! MOM DAD!" Tommy yelled. he just fell off his bike and scraped his knee. "Your okay sweetheart!" his mom said coming up to him and hugging him, his dad also joined the hug. It made Tommy feel so much better about his cut and he stopped crying, he was safe!
(BACK TO PRESENT)
I hugged Wilbur tighter and he hugged me tighter. I fell asleep in his arms feeling safe. I just hoped it would stay like this and that I wouldn't get betrayed again. I hoped this was the family, but I would still keep my walls up this was a 1 time thing and I would have to be more careful next time.
I hoped you enjoyed this chapter we got some brotherly love at the end and a nice flashback! ALSO TUBBO IS NOW HERE ! Next chapter will be the fostering YAY! Stay healthy, stay safe, and eat and drink! BYE BYE!!!