You began to wonder if he was avoiding going back with how slowly he was eating, carrying on a conversation with anyone who would come by. It wasn't until Neville came in that he was ready to go. What had happened that he didn't even want to be in the same room as him? It couldn't have been seeing you two in the hall yesterday? Could it?
You were making your way back to Head masters office when he pulled you to the side.
"Let's go to the astronomy tower" he said
"Uh Draco. We can do that tomorrow... we really should get started with Dumbledor. Don't you think?" You could tell he was trying to avoid going back now, any excuse.
"But..." he started, you cut him off with a soft kiss. "Come on Draco. I promise will be okay" you let her hand stroke his cheek, he sighed leaning into your palm. You know this wasn't a promise you should have made, but you really couldn't think of anything else.
As soon as you got to the Head masters office Dumbledor started. Instructing Draco to sit in a chair that had been placed before his portrait.
"Alright Mr. Malfoy. I am going to need you to try your hardest to think. Close your eyes if you need to but I need you to try and remember that last time you woke up from one of these fits" Dumbledor instructed.
You sat up at the cop of the stairs in the room, just watching as Draco closed his eyes. His breathing falling low, deep easy breaths like he was sleeping.
"Now think back. I want you to bring yourself to that moment when you woke up" Dumbledor instructed, Draco nodded.
"What do you see, feel or even smell?" He asked
"I feel... tired mostly... I smell... y/n's perfume?" He finished. You nodded, you remembered he had said that when he snapped back before. But neither of you were ever able to figure out why out of everything that was the trigger.
"Are you able to push back... really just think about being there. In that state" Dumbledor continued on. You sat quietly, holding both your wand and Draco's fight in your fists. You told him duel wanding was excessive, but he insisted.
The room went quiet for a long time, you wondered if maybe he had fallen asleep sitting there. Until he opened his eyes suddenly, scanning the room.
"Professor?" He looked at the portrait.
"Mr. Malfoy..." he nodded, Draco seemed confused.
"Have I done something wrong?" He asked, why else would he be in the head masters office?
"No son, I need you to close your eyes again.." Dumbledore tried to explain
"Well if I'm not in trouble I am leaving." He rose, heading for the door that of course didn't open "what is all this. Let me out. My father will hear about this!" He started pulling hard on the door.
"Mr. Malfoy please come sit" Dumbledore tried again.
"No! I am leaving!" He started patting his body for his wand. "Where is my wand? Where had you hidden it?" He left the door then. Digging through drawers and opening cabinet.
"Y/n" Dumbledore spoke, instructing you. You stood, caching Draco's eyes now. He watched you, his brow furrowed, the same as the last time. Like he just could not seem to place where he knew you from.
"Draco please sit" you asked pointing your wand to the chair.
"No. What is this?" You can hear the fire starting to roll inside him. The angry Draco starting to appear. He grabbed something from the shelf, chucking it as hard as he could in your direction. Narrowly missing you.
" Petrificus Totalus" you spoke softly, waving your wand. Just missing another thing from the shelf Draco had thrown. Draco seemed to freeze, crumbling to the ground.
"Move him" Dumbledore said. You were able to move him with the Leviosa spell, hard not but impossible with his weight. Setting him softly on the chair.
"Tie him" Dumbledore instructed. You grabbed a long braided rope from the curtains on the wall. Wrapping him tightly to the chair. Just as you finished your knot he snapped back, you wondered which Draco he would be.
"Let me go!" He started thrashing harshly.
"We need you to listen Mr. Malfoy!" Dumbledore voice boomed, you stood then trying to see if you could do anything. Draco's head shot back, crashing into your face. You heard a loud crack and a hot white pain, then blood pouring down your lips. You pulled your sleeve to your face stopping the bleeding.
"Let. Me. Go" he kept thrashing, not even noticing what he had done. You panicked, letting go of your nose and wrapping your arms around his shoulders as he threatened to get lose from the knots.
"Get off me you filthy mudblood!" He screamed. Trying hard to throw you off. But you held firm, you'd wand tight in your grasp.
"I need you to stupify him" Dumbledore instructed. Thinking of no other way to deescalate the situation.
"But Dumbledore" you coughed, blood running still.
"You have to wake him up now" Dumbledore insisted.
You let go of his arms, walking around to face him. Blood from your nose completely covering your shirt.
"Listen to me Draco Malfoy!" You yelled, he stopped dead watching you. "Close your fucking eyes before I make you!"
He clasped his eyes shut suddenly. His breathing nervous now.
"Now what?" You asked Dumbledore.
"Well clearly he isn't going to listen. So I am going to need you to force pull if you can"
"Isn't that dangerous?" You asked
"Yes" he answered, short and simple. You watched Draco for a long moment. His eyes clasped so hard shut he was starting to see stars.
"How?" You finally asked.
"Use your wand, press it to his temple." You did as instructed. "Call for the first memory."
"Draco. Listen to me. Unless you want to lose something important I beg of you please try and think of that dream. The one you can't make the real you remember. Please" you watched as a tear fell, rolling down his cheek and dropping onto his shirt.
You pressed the wand to his head, not knowing at all what was needed. Just begging, pulling for a memory. Just give me the one I need please. You watched as a white light pulled from his skin, clinging to the wood of your wand. Your heart was racing so hard you could only hear that in your eardrums.
"Put it in there," Dumbledore pointed to the cabinet full of small vials, which infront sat a shallow bowl of water, or what looked like water. You set the white light inside, watching as the water ignited.
"You can look at the memory" Dumbledore watched closely. You let your face fall into the liquid, it felt almost fuzzy, like that stage between asleep and awake. You saw it then, a long black table surrounded by people in cloaks.
"Yes Mr. Malfoy, you will kill Headmaster Albus Dumbledore." You heard The Dark Lord speak, the vision turning to the figure. It felt like you were looking at the Dark lord first hand, through your own eyes. You felt a terror that you had never felt before, a sadness and anger. You watched as the world around became a little dizzy, you saw yourself standing in a mirror, except it wasn't you. It was Draco looking at himself. Shaking, holding into the sides of the mirror to brace himself. An illness rolling over you seeing the anguish in his eyes, a child set for murder.
The eyes shift when the door to the side opens, looking at Narcissa who stood in the doorway.
"Mom" you heard Draco's voice ring through your body.
"Son" she came to him, whispering to him. Why couldn't you hear her? It was fuzzy? Like radio static where you could barely make out a word here and there. Then the memory faded out, you pulled your head back taking a deep breath in.
"It was Narcissa, she was telling him something. But I could only make our a new words" you turned to look at Dumbledore. Who nodded.
"You need to get back in there..." you nodded, this was hard. Your head was getting light as the blood slowed from your no doubt broken nose. Draco hadn't moved. Tears littered his shirt, he was stuck and was no doubt expecting death. You put this memory away into a vial.
"Draco, please..." you whispered to him as you set your wand back to his temple, making him wince. "I need to know what your mother was saying to you" you breathed, your body shaking. Pulling another memory, this one caused a face of discomfort to come from Draco. Who finally opened his eyes, locking your gaze. He didn't fight, he didn't move, he didn't speak. His eyes just screamed for help, making guilt take you over. What you would give to just help him, let him forget it all.
You finished pulling the memory. Letting it slide in the liquid again, breathing deep before you set your head inside.
There was the Manor again, this time only you and Narcissa sat at the table.
"Draco darling, we need you to do this. Your father is far too weak and we need proof to the dark lord we are worthy." She stated
"But mother I don't know if I can do it" Draco's voice escaped
"You have to. Or he will kill you." She looked into his eyes.
"Mother I..." he started before she stood, her wand resting on his forehead. He was startled, his body shaking the vision blurring with tears.
"No more fear. Only glory" She watched him as he sank into the chair. "We will be up top, where we belong Draco"
"Yes mother" he looked away from her, at his hands which he clenched into fists.
"Do not screw this up for us Draco" he looked back up at her. Her voice began, turning again into that awful foggy static.
"Fuck" you grunted as you pulled away. The memory fizzed out, what was going on? Why was Narcissa so intent on the mission?
"You can pull one more.. For today... but that really must be it" Dumbledore answered you obviously upset. You walked over to Draco, still wiping blood from your face. He watched you, his eyes open now, not fighting or arguing.
"Please just kill me" he whispered as you set your wand to his temple again. The words struck you like a lightning bolt.
"I am sorry" you whispered, pulling again. Please. Please. Please. You didn't know if you could handle this anymore, and you knew he couldn't either.
You watched this memory, your head sinking deep in the liquid.
You saw Narcissa standing over you, her wand to you.
"You failed Draco." she stood over him. "You pathetic thing"
"Mother..." he wept.
"I knew I was wrong when I suggested this mission for you to the Dark Lord, I thought you'd be strong enough. But you're weak. Just like your father" She knelt, looking at you. Her eyes filled with anger and disgust. "I will wipe this good away from you. Once and for all, even if it kills you..." She stood again, pointing at the wand at him. "Imperio" she whispered.
You were shot back from the memory. Crashing to the ground behind you.
"His mother used an unforgivable curse on him...." you shuddered. The unforgivable curses did so much damage to its victims. Scarring deep every portion of their soul. What on earth did she have him do?
"That would explain why he does not remember. When one is cursed like this, they often don't recall any of these moments. I have never seen someone start manifesting dreams like he has. Maybe something in him needed to know what happened"
Draco had seemed to fall asleep, his brain no doubt exhausted from losing 3 deep memories.
"He felt so much guilt when he didn't care that his parents had died." you let your hand rest on his cheek.
"Grief is a strange thing... I think I know how you can help him" Dumbledore continued, you turned to look at him.
"Make them go away. Now that you know the memories, take them away from him"
"You want me to Obliviate him...." how could you do that to him?
"You could save him if you do" Dumbledore reminded you.
"I need to ask him if he's okay with that... I can't take away his parents like that" You knew that while they were awful to him. He had good memories of them somewhere. How can you take someone's memories from them? Even if they were bad?
"He may sleep for a while now. So maybe you should take a seat. You're starting to look pale" Dumbledore pointed to a large chair at his desk. You must have lost a lot of blood in the time you ignored your nose.
You walked to the chair, your head spinning a little. You watched the room for a long time, the world slowly going black. You must have passed out.
-
You woke up to the feeling of someone carrying you, struggling a little under you.
"Give her here" you heard a voice call.
"I have her"
"Come on son, just give her here" you felt your body being transferred, to someone much taller and broader. Softer to the touch.
"Draco?" you whispered, your voice barely a whimper.
"He's okay y/n, I am taking you to Madam Pomfrey" You looked up at Hagrid you carried you seemingly with no issue. Of course he could.
You felt yourself blacking out again, trying to stay awake as much as you could. But it didn't work.
"Shes lost a lot of blood. But she will be okay. I was able to fix her nose though with no issue" You heard Madam Pomfreys voice as you fazed back in. "Why don't you go to bed.. You look like you've been through a lot Mr. Malfoy"
"Draco?" you tried to call, but nothing came out.
"Can i please stay here?" He begged, needing to stay with you.
"I can't tell you what to do Mr. Malfoy, you're not a student anymore"
He left her side then, sitting by you on the bed. His hand resting on your forehead. The sun was shining through the windows now, how long had you been out?
-
You woke up a few hours later, Draco sat awake. Standing at a nearby window.
"Draco?" this time when you called for him the noise finally came out.
"y/n" he rushed to your side, sitting beside you on the bed.
"What happened?"
"Dumbledore said I broke your nose... You lost a lot of blood"
"You didn't break it. He did" You sat up. Looking at Draco who just watched you, his eyes not leaving your face. You wondered how rough you must look.
"Dumbledore told me what needs to be done" Draco spoke finally. You looked into his eyes, watching him now. He was whispering "Please do it for me... Make them go away"