The Boy With The Blank Stare: The Promise

Chapter Ninteen: Please Don't Say It

Ouma's POV:

"Hideyoshi...he was a really good person...I got my favorite phone charm from him actually heh...I only really started using it after he was gone though...I feel bad about that sometimes...my last one was a gift from my grandmother though so maybe that's why...I guess..." Shirogane muttered. The atmosphere was tense for both of us.

Saihara had organized us to meet in a park near the school, he had even gotten us some cheap sodas from the local RcDonalds.

I swooshed around the strawberry panta, I could hear Shirogane digging through her bag aa she pulled out more items.

"Here's some photos I got...I'm sorry Hideyoshi and I barely made any sound recordings, and when we did he called them...what did he say? Shit posts?" Shirogane thought guessing.

"Sorry...I wish I did take more pictures back then...I never imagined....if I had known..." she stopped herself as Saihara patted my shoulder. I immediately felt my body tense up before he quickly let go.

"Sorry..." he whispered. I bit my lip more as moisture from the soda dripped over my hands.

I'm pathetic.

"These are nice photos actually, thank you" Saihara said. "I'm really proud of that middle one, it's actually from elementary school before we were even friends...I think Sanyu got a camera and she took pictures of everyone before the school confiscated it...I think she burried them in a sandbox outside so they wouldn't take her camera away again heh...

"I ended up rescuing it before we left, it was unusable, it was there for two years. But the film survived...I remember...I gave her a copy of the photos...she...sorry that's my only real memories, I have just some scattered group projects and the anime club" Shirogane apologized again with some her being plain comments or these memories being boring.

It's weird thinking still, that DICE had other friends. I guess I never thought of that back then since we spent all our time together, they were my only friends...but no...they did.

That man took them away from who knows how many people.

I was the selfish one, the only one who was allowed to grieve over their lost, while people like Shirogane and Kiibo put on a brave face for my sake.

....

I felt his hand hold mine, as if he knew what I had been thinking. Shirogane left on that last note, giving me her photos.

...

"This one here," Saihara said handing me a new one, "this one has I think Kentaro and Otome. They're holding some paper cranes, I think they might be ten here, one has a missing tooth heh..." he told me as I smiled.

'When Otome was younger she got her baby teeth pulled out sooner so she could get her braces, she used to whistle with the little gap...it was so annoying' I told him.

"Did she?" Saihara asked laughing, I nodded, 'What about this one?' I asked as I reached for another in the box.

A very cold and empty box...

"Sorry...she only had around ten...there might be more I'll ask if she still has that camera, maybe I can find someone who can retrieve more footage" Saihara apologized.

'It's fine' I said.

"Ouma...you're doing it again" Saihara said sternly, 'what?' I asked moving myself further from the detective.

"You're bottling it up, we talked about this. You know it doesn't get better, doing that...just-" he touched my shoulder, this time I slapped it away before flinching and cursing myself for my reaction.

It's always like this for us, huh? This isn't Momota. He won't stay if you do that.

You idiot.

'Sorry' I quickly apologized, 'I'm just tired...I want to go home...'I lied. Saihara didn't respond, but I heard the bench creak as he moved further away, the cold breeze chilled my bones even through my sweater.

....

'Hey Kichi, how come you always lie? Come on, I wanna know how messed up that mind is! You know how messed up mine is! It's fair!'

'Whaaat? You totally know everything already~'

'That's a lie!'

'Isn't it more fun to figure it out yourself?'

'So mean....'

....

"It's getting late" Saihara finally broke the silence, grabbing the handles for my wheelchair as we headed home.

...

"I guess I'll always have to wait" he whispered a bit bitter, I felt my fingernails dig into my arm, "hey wanna throw your soda out?" He asked.

I nodded, 'thanks' I could hear him sigh."Oh...you never drank your soda, why?" Saihara asked as I passed him the drink, 'sorry...strawberry isn't my favorite...'

The sour taste remained in my mouth.