Teach Me [COMPLETED✔]

25

*TW. Sexual Assault, Blood*

Aspen

The sisters that would watch over us, teach us and pray with us kept at bay of the evil of the world. We didn't listen to music, didn't watch TV, didn't even talk about anything that wasn't related to God or the studies. 

This whole world was different from the one I grew up in, shielded and protected from the many sins the world had committed. In a way all of us were following a path, to become part of the church, if we wished. We wouldn't be forced to stay, not once were we forced to do anything that we didn't wish. 

That was the golden rule. 

And that was part of the reason for taking the pill, I wouldn't force someone to have a kid with me. Nor would I force them to love me. 

Yet as I stood caged and shaking with fear, it dawned on me what Theo was asking. What he was going to do whether I liked it or not. 

Just because we weren't taught about sex didn't mean we were completely stupid. The nuns drew a thin line on what was right and wrong with couples, how both sides would get blurred if you weren't careful. So I was not a fool when I looked at Theo, I knew exactly what he planned to do.

Rape, the most vicious act behind killing. Behind murder, the taking of one's life. We weren't Gods, we had no reason to be one. To be able to take a man's life as we wished. 

But back to rape. That was one thing we were warned off. That the world was evil. That men looked at you with desire and lust. That even when you said no, they wouldn't listen. That a woman's voice was nothing. 

They were wrong. 

A woman's voice was strong. We didn't have to cower to a man. Didn't have to keep silent. 

My skin burned with distaste, with repulse and fright. Fingers digging into my flesh, to pull me against his chest. Hands slipped around my waist, flinching as his hand grabbed my ass, the other running up my shirt. 

I was frozen in place, unable to move. Every part of me begged to go, to run away from his hold. Yet I couldn't do anything, my body a numb sensation as Theo leaned down to kiss me the side of my neck. "It'll only be once," he whispered. 

Lie

It was a lie, I knew it. Chris had said once wasn't enough. How would I believe Theo when he said that. It would be an assault, over and over. He would use me, he would taint me with him. 

A million thoughts ran through my head as Theo kissed my neck, his tongue sliding up my neck to my jaw. Disgust filled my stomach at the feeling of his tongue, of the saliva trail he left in his wake. He would take my body, a body that was mine. 

Mine. 

Not Chris. Not Theo's. Mine. 

I was my own person. I had asked Chris to teach me because I wanted him, I craved him even if it was full of sins. Giving into Chris's touch was my choice, being forced was another. It was rape. 

Theo's words crawled back to me, if the board hears rumors about Chris sleeping with a teenager, his credibility would be lost. I didn't want that, I didn't want to burden him, to make him lose all he had worked for. But I wouldn't lose my body because of it, I was an adult, Chris was too. Theo's words didn't matter, it wasn't illegal. It wasn't unethical, it wasn't wrong. 

I felt foreign lips crawl up to my jaw, pressing soft kisses as if we were lovers. We weren't lovers. I felt him inch closer to my lips, lips Chris had only kisses once. Lips I had wanted Chris to kiss again and again, if only because I lo- I snapped. "No."