The Bars Between Us

44. Returning to the Lion's Den

Pulling up the house, its windows are dark but when I notice the time, it could purely be because Roman is in bed. I didn't let him know that I would be coming. I thought it would be better. He wouldn't get the opportunity to stew on his feelings and concoct a plan on what he's going to do to me. At least with me turning up out of the blue, I get his off-the-cuff reaction. I'll see his true feelings, hopefully.

I sit in the dark of the silent car, taking in my surroundings and the severity of what could happen. In the rearview mirror, through the back window, I can see the imposing building of the prison. In there, holed up in solitary confinement, is Nixon who saved me from this house, and now I'm going back. It almost feels selfish.

I sigh, pushing the door open, and clamber out of the car. With a quick glance over my shoulder, as if I were able to find Nixon through the windows and walls, I go to the steps.

The door unlocks loudly to my ears, and I cower as I step into the entrance. The floor is clear of any of my sick, and there is not a single sign of that night happening. It looks normal. Almost like the happy house, it was before everything started.

How deceptive!

I meander into the room, waiting for him to jump out of me like a ghoul in a haunted house. Nothing happens and even when I get to the stairs, and inadvertently stepping onto a creaky spot that like the door erupts through the house. I get to the top step, and that's when I begin to come to the conclusion that I'm alone. Usually, he would have woken up by now.

It almost makes it worse. I decide I'm not going to sleep, not until he comes home. He'll get that time that I was trying to avoid if

I'm asleep. He could do anything while I'm asleep.

I flick the switch on besides the door, thankful for the light that gets rid of the ominous shadows. I'm usually unafraid of the dark, but every shadow I see I imagine it to be Roman watching me.

I twist around and I nearly jump out of my skin when I see Roman lying in the bed, sitting up and rubbing a hand over his face. He squints at me, and his shock mirrors my own.

"DeeDee?" he asks groggily.

"Yeah," I confirm. I push a piece of my hair behind my ear, becoming self-conscious. He groans sitting back against the headboard, rubbing his face again. He sighs.

"You home for good?"

"For now," I amend. He groans again, shielding his eyes. He doesn't say anything else, instead just pulling back the covers for me.

"I need to brush my teeth," I tell him, and he nods. A petty part of me wants to annoy him some more, and leave the light on, but the years of abuse has me flicking the switch off. Even though it's dark, I find myself walking through the room with ease.

I get to the bathroom and pull the switch. Light floods the bathroom and I take that as my excuse to get some space to come to terms with everything.

I stare at myself in the mirror and push my blonde hair out of my face, my eyes focusing on my tired eyes. That did not just happen. I'm surprised at what just happened. No anger, and no abuse, if anything he wasn't exactly upset to see me. Happy almost.

I gather myself, rubbing my hands over my face, hoping for it to take me back to the reality of him being angry at me for not telling him what I was doing.

I open the cupboard holding the toothbrushes and only find Roman's. Mine's at Piper's. I grunt in frustration. It feels too intimate to use his brush. The last time I did that was on the honeymoon.

I grab the toothpaste and hesitate before picking up the brush.

Once I've finished in the bathroom I come out to find Roman has his bedside light on for me and is waiting. He pulls back the covers again, and I take the space reluctantly.

I settle down in the bed, and he joins me, looking at my face. I close my eyes, finding the eye contact too intense.

I'm just drifting off when I hear him speak, and it makes me jump. "You're really here?" he whispers, his breath brushing against my face. I have to hold myself back from pulling away.

Hey Guys!

Sorry for the delay, I should have had this up on Thursday, and next week will be on time. It should have just been a case of hitting publish, but I've been quite busy over the past few days, because starting tomorrow I have builders in the house adding an extension, so I was preoccupied with getting rid of things and getting ready!

Do you think Roman is being sincere?

What did you think?

What do you think will/want to happen next?

Thank you for reading, voting, commenting, sharing,  and following!

CC ;)