Fai | K-Pop Soloist

✧ DECALCOMANIA ✧

"You shouldn't feel sorry, this is life."

"But just because this is life, it doesn't mean you should be feeling like this. It isn't fair."

"It is fair, I set myself to be like this."

"Oppa, if you want to talk about it, we can."

"I read the draft you've started to write for the encore in your Seoul Concert," Jungkook slowly said, Fai nodded she was curious why he was reading the draft and how it would be relevant to their conversation, "You started to write about how you don't know who Kim Felicity is, but you know exactly who Fai is and you want to learn about who you are as a human. I feel the same way, sort of. I'm stressed because no matter how hard I try, I'm still not the person that millions of people love."

"Do you know what decalcomania is?"

"No clue."

"It's an art technique, the concept is simple. You transfer paint from one thing to another. Um... Let me show you," Fai stood up rummaging around her studio looking for a paper and pen. Fai sat back next to Jungkook and broke the pen, wanting the ink. Fai said in English, "Listen well."

"Okay."

Fai folded the paper in half to make a clear line down the middle, "The left side of the paper is Jungkook from BTS, the right side is Jeon Jungkook, the one I'm speaking to right now,"

Fai used the ink she broke apart from the pen and smudged it on the left side of the paper, "This Jungkook is loved by everyone, he's the main vocal, lead dancer, centre and deservingly so. He's known as the Golden Maknae as he excels in everything within his first try."

Fai folded the paper and opened it up, the right side of the paper now was coated with ink in a similar pattern to the left, "Jeon Jungkook wants this to happen."

"This is exactly how I feel... I want this to happen."

"This whole decalcomania can't happen though. It can't because they're two different entities and it's important for you to acknowledge and understand this. Let Jungkook be the perfect one, you've worked hard for that. But the real you should strive for your own happiness that isn't being the perfect guy on stage."

"It's hard to do that, whenever I look in the mirror and am reminded that I'm Jeon Jungkook and not the Jungkook from BTS. Jungkook of BTS shines bright while Jeon Jungkook is insignificant."

"No Oppa, don't say that. Over time you will learn and come to terms that Jeon Jungkook is as amazing as Jungkook. I hope you can become more satisfied with yourself and what you've achieved, as well as see the potential you have to really succeed in whatever it is that you want to do in future."

"Which Jungkook do you like more?"

"The you that I see now is the best version of you."

"Really?"

"Mmm," Fai nodded. She said in English, "You're a great person, have confidence in yourself!"

"I'm trying, but it's really hard."

"I know, it's okay. You can talk to me whenever it gets hard, I'm here for you."

"Thank you."

"Oppa, I hope you're always healthy, I hope you laugh so hard your cheeks hurt and I hope you have more happy days than sad ones"

"Don't say things like that, it makes me emotional."

"But I mean it," Fai's phone went off indicating a text message came through, "I'm sorry, I have to go now."

"Where are you going?"

"Mark's travelling tomorrow morning so we're going to meet up."

"Ahhh," Jungkook nodded, "I forgot you had a boyfriend."

Fai ignored what Jungkook said for the sake of not making it awkward. She walked over to her computer and musical equipment, switching everything off and packing all her things. "How's your new album going?"

"It's going good well, we're going to start with the choreography after the break. I honestly want to start writing music for my own mixtape."

"Woah that's so cool."

"Yeah, I'm not sure if I'll ever release it though."

"Do you know what direction you want to take it?"

"I know that I want to produce and write every single track and I want to be honest with my songs."

"That's going to be really hard."

"I know."

"You'll do well though."

"Hopefully," Jungkook stood up, "Do you need a ride? I can drive you to wherever you're going to."

"No, it's alright. Thank you though." Fai opened the door and switched off the lights with Jungkook following her, "See you later."

"Thank you for today Fai, you really helped me."

"Anytime, I know you'd be there for me too so it's only fair that I'm there for you."

- - -

⋰˚☆ Aya's Thoughts

okay so this chapter is meant to change your perception on a couple of things, i think... tell me what you think about their dynamic.

ive gotten so busy with all my uni stuff so it's hard to find time to write. updates will be getting slow, sorry :(
leave me some requests.
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