Please | Yoonkook

Mornings

{2, 239 words}

And that's how Suga was stuck laying next to Jungkook who wouldn't talk. Neither one of them were changed back into their normal clothes, because Jungkook absolutely refused. He didn't want to talk, he didn't want to get changed, he just wanted to kinda lay there.

"Jungkook me doing this is me trying-" "You said you would try- for me!" Jungkook cut him off, not even facing him. "Yeah, this is me trying. If I wasn't trying, I would've killed myself weeks ago in the hospital. I could've lied about something as simple as a headache, and take too much and easily overdose. Or, I could've ripped out my IV and cut my arms with the needle. But I didn't, because I'm trying, and yes, I'm trying for you." Suga ranted, forcefully turning Jungkook around by his shoulder. "Well it doesn't look like you're trying." Jungkook mumbled, staring up into Suga's eyes. "Well would you like for me to show you how this is under control?" Suga asked, but not really asking.

He quickly stood up, and went over to his dresser where he kept the razor blade he saw every other day. "H-hyung no, what are you doing?!" Jungkook jumped up at the sight of the silver object, and ran over to take it from him. "Well first of all, if I wanted to actually kill myself, I wouldn't stop doing this." Suga made a small cut on his arm, holding Jungkook back with his arm. "Hyung stop it!" Jungkook yelled at the sight of blood, and reached for the sharp object.

"Do you know how many I want to make on myself?" Suga asked, making another small cut on his wrist. "Yoongi hyung p-please stop!" Jungkook started to cry heavily at the dangerous object that could easily end anyone's life just out of his reach. "I want to make a really long cut right here." Suga made an imaginary line from his wrist to his elbow on his inner arm, small amounts of blood running down his hand. "Hyung please!" Jungkook begged, desperately trying to grab the razor blade from Suga after another cut formed on his arm. "But you know, I won't." Suga said smartly as he threw the blade down on the floor.

"Because then that could kill me, which would make you all sad and alone, and I love you too much to leave you like that." He told him, not even flinching at the pain in his arm. Jungkook broke down into more tears, and Suga pulled him into a hug. "It's controlled, Jungkook. You don't have to worry about me." Suga told him, not paying much attention to the fact the two were only in boxers. "It's slowly getting better, Kook, okay?" The elder separated the hug, and looked the maknae in his eyes. "B-but-" "Last time I did this was 2 days ago, if you don't could the three I just put on my arm stupidly." He cut him off.

"It's like an alcoholic trying to get sober for as long as they can. Now I know that's probably not a good comparison since you can't build up a physical dependence. But the thoughts are just as terrible as the physical dependence, so they're alike in a way. It's a process, and there's steps. I said I would try, and I am." Suga explained, but only making Jungkook cry harder.

He didn't believe RM when he told Jungkook Suga was cutting. And now, here he was, being told by the primary source it was true.

"I- p-please d-don't do that in fr-front of me again." Jungkook's voice trembled and shook, cracking Suga's heart. "Kook, I'm sorry." Suga pulled Jungkook against him by his bare waist, and kissed him on his lips. Jungkook returned the kiss, and whimpered internally at Suga's cold hands on his burning skin. "I love you, Jungkook." Suga told him, separating the kiss. But Jungkook clinged back to Suga, trying to savor the body heat from Suga. Suga picked up Jungkook bridal style, and carried him back over to his bed.

"I'm sorry I f-flipped out, i-it's just- I j-just miss Tae-hyung." Jungkook hiccuped on his cries at the elders name, and hid his face in Suga's neck. "I know Kookie, me too." Suga told him, kissing his neck lightly. Jungkook took it the wrong way, and blushed violently when he realized Suga was still incredibly hard. "I-I want him to wake u-up." Jungkook studdered, telling himself he would ignore this fact for a while. "Me too." Suga rested his chin on Jungkook's shoulder, and kept his arms around the younger's waist as he remained on his lap.