Why am I never enough??

part 22

sorry i was fighting my depression (it won) anyways on to the story

i go back to the phone and dejuane and malu are eating each faces off so i decided to sing Happier by Ed sheeran i told everyone to sit down and stop playing then i asked dejaune to stop sucking malus face off once everyone was done and looking at me confused i play the song
Y: Walking down 29th and park, i saw you in another's arms, only a month we've been apart, you look happier
De: y/n
Y: saw you walk inside a bar, she something to make you laugh, i saw that both your smiles were twice as wide as ours yeah, you look happier you do
by now dejuane was sitting in silence and malu was just holding his hand while everyone else looked sad
Y: ain't nobody hurt you like i hurt you, but ain't nobody love you like i do, promise that i will not take it personal, if you're moving on with someone new, cause you look happier you do, my friends tell me one day i'll feel it too, and until then i'll smile to hide the truth, but know i was happier with you
i started crying then ran in the bathroom just me and my thoughts telling me i'm not good enough and that no one cares i get in the shower and sit and cry for hours and hours once i'm finally out i just go outside and sit there thinking about maybe he still loves me maybe he replaced me maybe i was never good enough for him
Hai: you ok
she said walking slowly to me
Y: if you want to be then just think that
Hai: i'm serious y/n
Y: NO HAILEY IM NOT FUCKING FINE
Hai: ok ok
she just sat next to me while i cried and cried
Hai: girl instead of crying show dejuane what he's missing we've got all summer i'll exercise and whatever you want with you
Y: fine
i wipe my eyes and go sleep in haileys room with roshaun for the rest of the time we were in the mountains i spent most of it crying and facetiming kobe and i even told alvaro that i don't wanna be with him because i want dejuane but me and alvaro are still best friends we got home a couple of days ago and tomorrow i was going back to Atl because summer was officially over which sucked because now i have to see dejaune but hailey kept her word and exercised with me everyday and drank healthy smoothies in pretty proud with the progress i made for my last day on New Jersey we all hung out and played soccer and chilled and had a sleepover and now it was officially time for me to go back
Y: i'm gonna miss you guys so much bruh
Varo: i'm gonna miss your cuddles
Y: i promise to visit and give cuddles
Hai: i'm gonna miss my workout buddy
Y: same but i'll see you when i see varo
Rob: can't believe your already leaving
Ro: fr summer felt so short
Y: exactly bruh like i do not want to see dejuane again
Ale: let us know EVERYTHING that happens
Y: i got you i promise
i hugged everyone and boarded my flight back to Atl once i got off the plane i went home and hugged my mom and told her about me meeting das ofc she was a little salty but i didn't give a fuck then i went in my room and posted on insta

y/n.baby: back in Atl sadly
liked by derektrendz and 900000 others
derektrendz: we're on our way
y/n.baby: hurry up then
kbreezo: i'm already outside

i read kobe's comment then run downstairs and open the door i jump on him and he spins us around
Y: i missed you so much bruh
K: i missed you too
Y: so who's all coming
K: idk yet
Y: guess it's a surprise
K: yup
as we're upstairs playing and talking there is a knock on the door so we run downstairs and answer and derek, mike, vallyk, andre, justin, tatyana, cynthia, cherry, ansley literally tackles me to the ground
Y: OW SHIT
C: SORRY BUT GIRL WE MISSED YOU WTF
D: fr bruh you left for 3 FUCKING MONTHS
Y: sorry not sorry
M: you glowed up tho
Y: same old flirty mike
M: you know it
we were just playing and catching up and i was telling them about the people i met and showing them pictures when dejaune came in i missed him too bruh no matter how much i said i hated him i couldn't get him off my mind so i run to him and jump up and hig him he hugs back and i get down then malu walks through the door
Y: no bro wtf get out
Malu: why
Y: because it's my house and i don't want you here
Malu: fuck you then come on baby
De: nah imma stay
Malu: wtf
she slaps dejuane and then tries to walk out i gave dejuane a kiss on the cheek she slapped then i grabbed her hair, pulled her to the ground and started beating the shit out of her i was sitting on her chest just punching her face then dejuane pulls me off and malu runs out getting in her car and driving off
De: you didn't have to do that
Y: but i did
De: that was extra tho you ran tf out
Y: wow come for me for defending you
De: i didn't ask you to
Y: wow just fucking wow
i run up the stairs and go to my room and lock the door not crying just laying down looking at the ceiling then i hear knocking on the door and i thought it was kobe but it was dejuane
Y: what do you want
De: you
Y: dejuane i don't have time for this shit
De: i'm serious y/n
Y: well you have hella a way of showing it
De: i know i fucked up but please give me at least one more chance
Y: idk
i walk into the shower and as i'm washing my hair i feel a pair of arms snake around my waist and it's dejuane
Y: boy get out
De: nah i'm good
Y: well then stay back there and leave me alone
De: why
Y: ok i'll do something with you if you answer this one question
De: ok ask it
Y: did you do anything other than kiss malu
De: you mean like make out
Y: stop playing with me bitch DID YALL HAVE SEX
he didn't say anything he just looked down
Y: thank you that was all i needed to know
i then got out grabbed my towel and went in my room and started changing
De: bruh it was only 13 times
Y: omg let me find a fuck to give
De: im serious
Y: omg wait fr
De: yes i'm being fr
Y: omg wait you fr thought i gave a fuck
De: bruh come on stop playing
Y: you're saying it was only 13 times like i'm gonna start dancing or some shit we were together 8 months and we only did it 10 times you're telling me you did it more with her when y'all were only together a fucking month, mane get the fuck out my damn face
De: are you for real right now
Y: nah i'm for fake
i put on my pajamas and turned on the tv
Y: oh my bad over there is the door make sure you're on the other side of it
De: you're running out
Y: actually i'm not running at all i'm sitting down
De: i'm not about to play with you
Y: i know because i wouldn't even let you get that close to me
De: STOP FUCKING AROUND
Y: i'm not i didn't have sex 13 times with someone who i was in a 1 month relationship with
he walked out mad ash while i was just irritated and laughing then i turned on Madea a Family Funeral and went to sleep

gonna make her play hard to get 😖