Teach Me [COMPLETED✔]

8

To just go up to him and ask. "Hey so yeah, last time I heard a noise coming from your room. And I was curious so I peeked inside your room. And guess what? I saw you naked and having sex with a woman. And everytime I think of that, I feel strange. And also I've been finding these white stuff in my underwear. What is it?"

Honestly it sounded so bad and embarrassing. Chris could scold me for snooping in on him, to invade his privacy in the confinements of his home. And I knew it would be weird, a weird conversation to have with him even if he was a doctor and could explain all these changes.

So I did what a normal girl would do, I pondered. I searched the web. Crazy things one can find on the internet, unfiltered things. Apparently I was aroused by the sight of him, which was not good. Aroused meant lust, and that too was a sin.

Realization struck me deep, knowing I was feeling more than just a crush. That what I was feeling was the same thing a girl would feel for a boy. But in this case, in my case it wasn't with a but. But rather someone older, more mature, experienced. And maybe that was okay, maybe that feeling was okay.

Maybe it was okay if I acted on those feelings. Even if it blew up in my face.

But back to right now. "Why are you acting like this?" My voice sounded pained, hurt. "We were fine," I muttered absently sitting down.

Years of feeling alone, of being left alone. And now that I had someone, they were once again closed off. "We would talk, bond without any sorts of weirdness. Why now? What did I do?" I added my face falling to my hands, I wouldn't cry. But I felt like it.

There was silence, only the hum off the coffee pot. Taking in deep breaths, I rose to see him. My gaze fell to his, grey eyes staring intently at me. Taking in my clothes, a flicker of something passing but fading quickly. "You didn't do anything," he blurted out.

"Then what?" I snapped at him. Snapped, anger, wrath. Another sin, many that follow.

He took a long breath, his eyes closing. "It just, there's things I'm thinking. Stuff I shouldn't think," he said opening his eyes, dark gaze falling on me. Making my chest thump rapidly, heat spreading across my face.

"Like?"

He looked away shamefully, "Doesn't matter."

"Then stop being weird and avoiding me-" I said reaching for his hand- "Nothing weird." He stayed quiet, his eyes at our joined hands. His palm open as my own hand sat on top of his.

"We're both adults. We shouldn't be acting like this. Okay?"

I waited for him to respond, for him to pull away. But he didn't. He looked at me, and I could see the struggle, the debate in his eyes. "If it's my clothes I can change. But I don't think it's weird. You've seen me topless, yes. But you're a doctor. You see men and women naked all the time. It's normal," I added, trying to reason with him.

Looking at him, I saw the fight die. His eyes closing once, opening to see them shining. "You're right," he said, warm fingers squeezing my own.

I smiled, gazing at our fingers. Feeling comfort in that single act, yet I pulled away. His own fingers grasping onto mine before letting go, his hand dropping to my exposed thigh. "Nothing weird," I repeated loudly, confirming what we just talked about.

But as I said that, nothing about his hand on my thigh felt normal. Not that I wished things to be normal, not with him.

"Nothing weird," he repeated, warmth filling my body as I felt his palm settle down.

I let it be, feeling too high to move it. We ate, Chris returning to his paper. We acted like things were fine, but deep inside of me I knew they weren't and I knew they would only get more complicated. I should have been bothered by it, but I wasn't. Maybe I wanted complicated, messed up. Wanted to fight for something instead of being handed the easiest way out.

I ate as best as I could, not daring to move an inch as Chris' hand still lay on my thigh. My eyes had kept flickering between him and his fingers, shivers running down my spine as he lazily moved them. Fingers spreading, squeezing slightly before moving again.

I took a peak at him, expecting to see some sort of emotion on his face. But Chris was calm, almost at ease. I could only smile, seeing such calmness in him. Not wanting to move, afraid to take away this moment.

In those moments, I could feel my breath catching. My eyes snapping to see his fingers moving up my thigh, sliding underneath my dress. Palm opening up and sliding down my leg, caressing it slowly. Over and over he did that, an itch growing in the center of my body. My legs begging to press themselves together, to push away the growing sensation. That slow burn spreading across every inch of my body, throbbing and itching. Pricking my skin in a heated need.

Slowly I moved my eyes from his face to his chest, lowering to his lap. My eyes widening slightly, seeing that bulge. Something he had said meant affection, love.

Remember naive...