sixty two

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"Damn. You look like you just got up from dead." Eric lay relaxed on his bed in their shared room, throwing the book he was reading to the other side of his mattress. 

"I take that as a compliment." Seungcheol shrugged, dropping his worn out body on top of the duvet and staring up at the ceiling. His thoughts went back to the conversation he had earlier with his dad.

They had just signed the contract wherein Seungcheol's freedom was promised. The crumpling sound of paper was heard when Seungcheol pulled out the contract, reading word by word to make sure there were no mistakes, or fine prints he might have overlooked in the first place.

After rereading it at least three times he could safely confirm that everything was right. After this final job he would be able to go out free again and live a normal life. 

"Now tell me, what is it that you want me to do?" Seungcheol had asked his father, who shoved the handgun back in his direction. 

"You have to go to a location tonight a bit further away, I have set up a driver for you already. You'll get a little earphone for further instructions once you're inside the building. Trust me when I say that I finally trust you enough to put you up with a serious job." 

Seungcheol had still been confused as to what his father was trying to point out. "But what do I have to do once I'm inside? What's the location?"  

And his father had only grinned in response. 

"I need you to kill someone for me."

"Hello? Earth to Charlie?" 

He shot up from his bed and sat straight, glancing at Eric on the other side of the room with a mortified look in his eyes. "damn, what happened to you?" Eric also sat straight on his bed, trying to figure out as to why Seungcheol was so worked up out of sudden. 

"Does it have something to do with the conversation you just had with mr. Choi?" 

Seungcheol let out a long drawn out breath he had been holding in for god knows how long, letting himself fall back on the bed, being engulfed by the musty scent that lingered off his bedsheets. "He gave me my final job."He sighed out, looking up at the dirty white ceiling, paint hanging loose. 

"Again? Don't you think you should stop trusting this man over and over?" 

Seungcheol waved the paper he clenched tightly in his fist in the air, too far away for Eric to read. "We made up a contract. If I complete his last task I can go out freely."

"Then what are you sulking over? You're finally getting your freedom back! You can go back to Jeonghan and build up a life!" 

"It's the job I have to finish that's bothering me." Seungcheol sighed out, looking aside to meet Eric's questioning gaze. "He wants me to kill someone tonight. He even set me up with this middle aged driver so you can't come with me."

Eric gasped, this was the first job Seungcheol had to take care of where he wasn't the person driving him. This time he couldn't be there for emotional support, or for their usual early morning conversations at the cliff. 

Even the drugs they had to bring all the way across the country had been under Eric's accompany, since Seungcheol still needed to be watched at. 

"What?" Eric asked, shocked expression displaying on his face.

"I can't kill someone Eric. How am I supposed to kill someone?!" Seungcheol lifted his head a little and slammed it back against his pillow aggressively, letting out a frustrated growl. The feeling of the cold metal coming from the gun being pressed against his back, in-between his skin and his waistband, suddenly felt heavier than before. 

His airways seemed to be clogged, making it harder for him to breathe properly. His entire head hurt from the words his father had told him, that kept circling through his head. murder. killing. It was all too much.

"Have you ever killed someone Eric?"

Seungcheol looked aside, filled with anticipation that Eric would shake his head or say no. Although he could have already guessed the answer before even asking the question, knowing that he had done so much more jobs than Seungcheol would ever have to do. 

"I have." Eric lowered his gaze, obviously ashamed of himself. "Multiple times actually, I lost count after a while."

The room fell in a heavy silent, both boys staring in different directions. Seungcheol felt empty, Eric filled with regret. But to his surprise, Seungcheol remained calm. Because how could he blame Eric? He had been just as forced into all of this as he was. 

"Have you ever killed someone innocent?" 

"I have.. once.. We were at an abandoned shelve, one of their mans held me under shot. We were with three more men and we couldn't see any other escape. When we finally made it out alive we had to hury out, the men inside who trapped us only being unconscious. We tried not to kill anyone, but when we drove away there was this woman, she appeared out of nowhere. Everything happened so quick."

Eric looked up to the ceiling, the tears that formed in his eyes visible and he swallowed the rising lump in his throat away. "I was the driver.." He whispered, barely audible for Seungcheol to hear. "Your father would say that I haven't killed that many, but in my opinion it were too much. Of course it was less hard when I knew they were rapists, child predators or other assassins. But sometimes, me and the others who had to do the job, had to push ourselves through a line of guards or other criminals first, shooting them, to get to the actual victim."

"I'm so sorry Eric. I didn't know." Seungcheol had no idea what more to say. He never thought of Eric as someone to kill another. He didn't see him any different of course, knowing that his father had the power manipulate people till the point where he could let other people do whatever he wants. However, somehow it hurt him that he never saw past Eric's relaxed smiles. 

For gods sake, how traumatized would he be at this point. 

"It's okay Charlie, you don't have to be the one to worry about me." Eric clearly swallowed, giving Seungcheol a piercing look. "Should I.. maybe, you know.. give you one important advice?"

Seungcheol always went to Eric whenever he needed advice on something, but never had he thought of asking him how to cold-bloody plant a bullet into someone's brain. 

"I think I can use that."

"Look away." Eric said calmly. "Never look someone straight in their eyes when you pull the trigger. It's the scariest thing on earth and the thought will haunt you until the point where it will eat you alive." 

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