forty five

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Seungcheol could notice a slight sense of anger in Jeonghan's eyes and in the way he spoke. But mostly fear. The fear of being left alone. 

"Yes.. she is my ex girlfriend." Seungcheol sighed, lowering his head as defeated as he felt. 

"Have you been lying to me Cheol..?" Jeonghan asked in a shaking voice, making Seungcheol shoot up his head instantly to meet his watery eyes. 

"Hannie.. I will explain to you, okay?" He reached out to grab both Jeonghan's hands and forced him to keep eye contact. Jeonghan bobbed his adams apple, swallowing the rising lump in his throat as he nodded. 

"Remember, when I told you about the first person I shared a kiss with, the one i didn't give permission for?" Jeonghan nodded again. "That was with her. I wasn't in a good relationship with my dad back then and it was quite a complicated situation, but he and her parents forced the two of us in a relationship so their cooperation would go smoothly." 

Jeonghan gave him a hostile look and pulled his hands back, clearly suspecting something. "But if it was forced, how come she tells me you were together with the biggest smile on her face? And why are you still in contact?" 

"I don't know why she told you that because it isn't true. After I moved here two months ago I deleted her contact and everything that had to do with my past. I don't even know why she showed up here out of nowhere because I can't even remember telling her where I live right now. Let's just say she's a little crazy." 

Jeonghan's bottom lip started trembling and Seungcheol feared he would start crying in no time. But magically, he kept it inside and swallowed it away yet again. "I don't understand a single thing of it. Why did your dad do something like that? Why is she acting like this? I don't even know anything about the person you were up until two months ago." 

Seungcheol felt a pang in his heart. He knew they would come at this point eventually. But he only had one day left, he couldn't mess it up right before he had to leave him. This last day he had to prove Jeonghan that true love does exist without getting him involved in the shit he left behind in the first place. 

Even if he had to break everything tomorrow. 

And if Yenna hadn't shown up to mess around with everything they had build up, it would have been perfect. 

But here he was, in the mess his ex girlfriend caused. 

"I'm sorry Hannie.. But it's really not the right time to tell you about it. I know you might not understand why I can't tell you anything about it just yet, but please. please. wait a little longer for me to explain. I promise you I will tell you eventually, but please trust me on this one."

The anger in Jeonghan's eyes started ebbing away, making Seungcheol release a relieved breath. The boy lowered his gaze and started fidgeting with the sleeves of his sweater. "I'm sorry Cheol..."

Seungcheol instantly grabbed hold of both sides of Jeonghan's face, forcing him to look up and make eye contact. "How many more times do I have to tell you you don't have to be sorry for something that isn't even close to your fault." 

"Sorry.. " Jeonghan shot his eyes down, trying to do anything to avoid eye contact with his boyfriend. But Seungcheol just gently shook his face, trying to get his eyes up to his again. As soon as their gaze met he lifted his dark eyebrow.

"Don't be sorry silly. I just said you don't have to be sorry for anything at all. What happened a moment ago is completely my own fault and I don't want you to blame yourself for that-" "-bu-" "-no but's. I should've been more clear about what happened in the past and about my ex. But there is a reason why I'm not telling you any of this and that is to protect you. I know you might not understand that right now, but I really can't tell you more. You are on the absolute top of my priority list and I don't want you to get involved in the mistakes I made." 

The eyes of the long haired boy widened a little and Seungcheol knew he said too much already. But he had to do at least something after seeing how big of a mess Jeonghan was after Yenna's little visit. Heck, he didn't even know what Yenna told him or did to him. 

Knowing how good she was at manipulating people to get whatever she wanted. 

"I promise you I will tell you soon, okay?" Jeonghan nodded and eyed Seungcheol with a much lighter emotion. "That's fine with me Cheol. I'll accept you and give you all the time you need." 

The widest smile appeared on Seungcheol's face, one that made Jeonghan's tummy flip and feel an aggressive storm of butterflies roaming through his insides. Of course he would give Seungcheol all the time he needed. In the end, Seungcheol had done the same thing with him too. He had never pushed Jeonghan to tell him more about his situation at home, so Jeonghan planned to take it equally as slow as his boyfriend did. 

"Let's drink our coffee's, i bet they're cold by now. And you can pick what we're doing after that!" Seungcheol proposed, pulling back his hands and being the first to take a sip of his coffee. He pulled a face once the now cold liquid slid down his throat and let out a deep breath once he swallowed. "It's cold.."

Jeonghan laughed about Seungcheol's typical behavior and followed his example, tasting the equally cold coffee. "Let's just go home and stay in bed all day. I don't know, watch a movie?" 

Seungcheol expression slightly turned serious again. Did Jeonghan really just want to stay inside and do absolutely nothing? But of course, he didn't know what was going to happen. And if something as simple like that made him happy, Seungcheol would happily please his desires. 

"Are you sure? I mean, I can take you everywhere you want?" But Jeonghan shook his head, downing the coffee at once and placing the huge cup back on the table. "I really prefer lazy days." 

"As lazy as you are." Seungcheol playfully winked at him, getting up from his seat and offering Jeonghan his hand, which he happily grabbed a hold of before Seungcheol led him to the front of the store. 

If hanging around in bed all day made Jeonghan happy, Seungcheol would give the boy his happiness. 

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