Deedra, Lani, and myself sat in the empty waiting room waiting for our mother. We were offered refreshments and cookies but I was too anxious to eat. I bit the inside of my cheek, a habit I have of doing when I get nervous. Looking through the glass wall, I could see two men walking behind a woman that I was positive is my mother.
I swallowed the lump in my throat, waiting for them to bring her into the visiting area. When she finally came into the room, her eyes landed on me first. She looked different. Mama wasn't as skinny as she was before. Her skin looked smooth and flawless, she looked happy and healthy; truly. "My girls." Trina's voice cracked.
"Hey, ma." I cleared my throat, standing to my feet. She walked towards me, pulling me into a tight. I couldn't deny how tense and awkward it felt at first. After the drugs, the affectionate mother went out the window for my siblings and I. "Oh, my! Dee-Dee and Lani, my sweet girls. Come here." She called Deedra and De'Lanice over. "It's good seeing you, ma." Deedra hugged our mother briefly. Trina slipped Deedra a hearty smile before leaning in for a hug from Lani. "I'm just not ready for that." De'Lanice stopped Trina. She sighed, understanding why this was touch-and-go for her.
Trina took a seat in the single seater couch while Deedra, Lani, and myself sat on the three seater across from her. We all eyed her closely. "I know y'all probably won't believe a word I say, but I really do miss seeing you guys faces." She said. "Truth is, I feel good. Doctor Wilder and her staff really are helping me. I stopped showing up for you all. As a mother, I let y'all down." She went onto explain. "That's good to hear you're getting help. I was iffy about this place when Des suggested it." Deedra responded. Trina chuckled.
"So, it took for you to be admitted to rehab for you to realize you were a horrible mother to the four of your children?" Lani questioned with anger, deciding to but into the conversation. She didn't know what else to say. Her last encounter with our mama wasn't one that she wanted to relive. She, too just like Darnell; was scarred. "Lani!" Deedra snapped. Trina pursed her lips while doing a hand gesture to stop Deedra. "As horrible as it sounds, yes, it took for me being here to realize that. I never wanted a broken family, but after y'all dad got sentenced life became stressful with four kids." Trina reasoned. She was never the type to admit to her wrongs— her opening up came as a shock to her three daughters.
"Des did it. Why couldn't you?" De'Lanice asked. "I chose being an addict over a mother." Trina's voice cracked; indicating she was ashamed. Deedra sighed, feeling a sudden rush of sympathy towards their mama. "I don't know if I'll ever get over the pain you've cost all of us individually, not to mention as your children." Lani continued speaking, being openly honest since she didn't plan on coming back to this place to visit their mother again. I sat back, allowing De'Lanice to freely express herself since she wasn't one to often voice how she felt about certain situations. "Time heals all wounds." She quietly mumbled, looking down at the white tiles.
"I'm assuming Darnell feels the same that's why he didn't waste his time coming?" Trina looked at Deedra for answers. "You know how D is. He'll come around." Deedra shrugged, giving her a faint smile. "Who knows when that'll be." I chimed in. Mama sighed, "It's all my fault." She rubbed her temples. "You neglected us as a Mom. If I didn't step us for these kids— my sisters and brother, CPS would've stepped in. We're all already so messed up by the choices you decided to make, them being put in the system would've only dug graves for them and me, being their older sister. So, I did what I needed to do." I played with my nails as my voice bounced off the walls, giving myself goosebumps.
Trina was lost for words; or maybe she didn't know how to respond, either way she knew she was to blame for the trauma each child dealt with individually. "I really, really wish there was a rewind button." She folded her hands on the table, looking at each one of her girls. They all looked grown up from the last time she remembered. "It takes time, ma." Deedra stepped in. It seemed like she was the only one still open about having a relationship with our mama. "You were always the angel child, Dee-Dee." Trina slipped Deedra a bright smile.
"We should probably get going now." I cleared my throat. "Yeah." Lani agreed, rising from her seat. "Uh, okay. Yes. Y'all have a long drive back." Trina nodded. As we gathered our things, I could see Deedra and Mama sharing another hug from the corner of my eye. She was right; Dee-Dee was always the Angel child. She was the one quicker to forgive and forget, always seeing the good in people, even when they don't deserve it. "Des, send Darnell my love." She stopped me in my tracks. I shook my head, exchanging no other words as I made my exit.
- - -
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Location: H A V A N A, C U B A
Quan landed in Havana, the capital of Cuba around noon. He and two other men checked into their hotel rooms. He was honestly ready to execute his plan and return to Atlanta. Quan opened his laptop as images of Monica loaded onto the screen. He and his men were tracking her every movement, being discreet and cautious.
He was waiting for the right window of opportunity to take Garcia down. However, the quicker he could make his move was the quicker he could go home. He didn't know why, but something about being in a different country that he didn't know shit about made him uncomfortable. He knew he had sturdy backup, but that's not what worried him.
"Yo, Q." Rocco called out, walking into his room. "What?" Quan sounded irritated, looking up at him. "Princess is on the move, alone." Rocco informed showing Quan the live feed. Quan took a look at the iPad screen, watching as Monica departed from her goons. He thought that was very strange because Monica never went anywhere without at least two armed men.
"Aight, keep watching her. If she's still alone by sundown, we move in." Quan instructed. He was used to working alone that when it came to giving out orders; shit felt weird. He let out a sigh, running his hands down his face. He leaned back into the chair, scrolling through his phone. He scanned through his messages, seeing all the thirsty bitches who couldn't leave him alone, though he was to blame for them being so thirsty.
+1 (678) 309-5521: Still ignoring me I see 🙄 hit me back. 3:45pm
China🐱: Hey daddy. Miss you 💕 ft later? 2:15pm
+1 (404) 725-1879: if u didn't want me tripping then why did u fuck me so good ?? u just like these niggas Q 🚮!! 1:30pm
+1 (917) 215-5527: When are you coming to New York again? Had fun last time 💋 11:07am
Destiny🍫😍: That's cool . Have a safe trip ♥️😏 9:00am
Quan shook his head at all the girls in his phone. He was leading so many woman on just for sex, which he knew was wrong but he couldn't help it. He pressed Destiny's contact, putting the phone to his ear. The phone rang a few times before going to voicemail. He figured she was asleep since it's night time back in Atlanta. He decided on leaving a message.
"Hey, it's me. Just wanted to let you know I'm here." He said into the phone, pacing the room. "I'll talk to you when I can. Stay safe." He said before hanging up. Destiny was different from the girls in his phone. Though she didn't have much, she held her own at a young age. He admired that about her because it reminded him of himself when he was young and hungry on the come up. She was intriguing to him to say the least.
But a guy like Q was the wrong man a girl like Destiny could fall for. Under the looks and charm; was a damaged man, hiding the pain he felt the need to shelter from the world and everyone in it.
