Ch#18 Trust Yourself

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Ch#18 Trust Yourself

Two weeks passed by ever since I was beaten up, Riley opened up and we spoke up to the Leaders. Yohan and Bethany always kept trying to persuade Ellis, but in vain. He never let them speak. Each day they would come to us and apologize for not being able to convince him and go back to knock some sense into him again.

And I was not allowed to move an inch from my place except for washroom breaks. Riley, Bethany and Yohan looked after me in the past two weeks and now I am almost healed up. My bruises lightened up to a greenish-yellowish shade while my arm was as good as new. I can actually move around now but these idiots do not let me. I didn't want to sit around here anymore, I wanted to complete the mission for which I was here.

"Deep thoughts, huh?" It was Yohan. When did he come?

"Yes, Yohan. Your non-existent love life is a quite deep thought. I just can't find the end of it", I shrugged while he just hit the back of my head.

"Ow! What was that for?", I howled at him.

"Just felt like it", he shrugged while I glared at him. Soon enough, Riley and Bethany came with my food. Students started to fill in one by one, after lunch.

"Riley, there's no key to that door to the Base, right?" , I asked while munching onto my food.

"Yes. It can be opened from the outside only. Why do you ask though?"

"If there was a key we could somehow try to steal it", I lied. I had a plan and these guys wouldn't let me move. So I had to lie.

"Will we ever be able to get out of this hell?", Bethany voiced out in sorrow.

"Come on, Beth. Do not lose hope. We have held in for so many months, we can do it further as well. Remember, Rome wasn't built in a day", Yohan tried to calm her down.

"But they were laying the bricks for it every hour, weren't they?" That is a point to be noted. Yes, Rome wasn't built in a single day, but every person worked hard, every single day, every hour to make it stand strong.

"And we have done nothing to save our friends from this hell", Yohan agreed with her. I looked at him, at Riley and Bethany and at the other students here. With every passing day, they are all losing hope. Everyone here is succumbing into their fear. They started to give up in their hopes of being able to get out of this hell hole.

No. This can't happen. They cannot lose their hope. I have to revive their fighting spirit from within themselves. I finished off my food without uttering a single word after Bethany's question and waited for Dave to call the spies for reporting. He usually calls them during the weekends.

Later that evening, Dave called for Terrence and Matt, the spies. As soon as they left the Base, I gathered around all the students. I couldn't stay still anymore. "Alana, you can sit and speak", Yohan suggested, worrying about my bruises. But I ignored him. That idiot needs to know that I am completely fine now. It is not the time for me to rest behind and let the poor students here suffer.

When I realized that the whole student body was looking at me, curious about what I was going to say, I suddenly felt nervous from all the attention. It has been years since I have been the centre of attention. I couldn't get used to it.

Snap yourself out, dumbo! You aren't getting the attention for your visuals! You gathered them around, you idiot.

Just how many times do I need to tell you to not call me an idiot!

I swear, if I type 'idiot' in Google, your picture would come up.

Ugh! You just-

"Alana? You there?"

Riley brought me out from my stupid fight with myself. Yeah. I am crazy, I know.

Now count how many times you have told that until now?

Shut up!

"Sorry. It's just that I zone out sometimes", I replied awkwardly. Now let's throw self-fight and nervousness outside the window. I cleared my throat and began speaking. "The reason I gathered all of you here is, let me be frank, to knock some sense into y'all." I was met with confused looks from the students, in return.

"Let me get straight to the point guys. We do not have much time. Before Terrence and Matt come back to the Base, I need to get my point across your heads. So listen to me carefully. You guys are stuck up in this shit hole since the past three months, right? And there are few students who joined the Academy six months back as well. But I joined just two weeks back. I may sound rude to you people, some of you probably don't even trust me. But, right now, I am not here to gain your trust." Everyone still looked confused at where I was trying to lead this conversation to.

I took a deep breath and continued, "Guys, my friend here asked a question. Rome wasn't built in a day, but they were laying the bricks every hour. And what have we done being stuck up in here for so many months? Neither have we been able to protect ourselves or our friends, nor have we been able save any of the students here who look up to us." I looked at Bethany and Yohan. I directed my words towards them. "Yes, you guys still have a long way to go. But stop for a moment, and look behind you."

I then looked back at all the students and shot them a proud smile. "Look at where you have reached. Three, four, five and even six months have passed but yet you are all still alive. None of you gave up, neither on your life nor on your friends. All of you have done a great job in coming this far." I could see the smile spreading on everybody's face.

But not Ellis. Well, we can leave his count. Who cares about him, right? Right.

I then continued, reaching the main point of my abrupt speech. "But now I see that you have started to lose hope. I can't find that fighting spirit in you guys. Why? Are you now afraid that your end will be in this shit hole? Have you started to fear Dave?" Their smile dropped and I saw the loss of hope in their eyes.

"Did you people give up? Fear is nothing but an emotion which eats us up. We need to fight fear. We need to fight Dave! So stop looking up to the Leaders! No offense to the Leaders, they aren't your freaking Guardian Angels. You, yourself are. Stop counting on them and be your own damn hero! Believe in yourself. You have survived a lot and you will survive whatever is coming ahead. I'm not telling you guys to stop trusting the Leaders and the other students of this Base. I want you to believe in yourself that you can save the others, while you entrust your life in their hands. And for that, I want all of us to trust each other, support each other, and stand for each other. No matter what, walk together, hand in hand. Have faith in yourself that you can get the hell out of this place and you will bring the others out as well. Stop praying that the Leaders will get you out. Pray that you will become strong enough to save everyone else! Now tell me guys, who's with me?" I could see the hesitant look in their faces. 'Please support me. Please stand with me', I kept chanting, with my fingers crossed.

"I am."

"I am too."

"Me too."

"Us as well."

"Let's throw shit on Dave's shit face!"

Everyone laughed aloud at that comment.

I almost teared up seeing the shine in their eyes, their burning determination. I realized yet again how we need to let go of our fear and face it. It may work out or may not. But what matters is do we trust ourselves or not.

Therefore trust yourself. After all, the person you need to protect, comfort, embrace and trust the most in this world is you.

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