unwanted demons | iwaoi

Chapter 20

These fields are the fields of home. Perhaps He had to go far away to appreciate it, but never again. He saw its everyday beauty for the wonder it is and know this is where am most at peace. The grass waves like people in a stadium, catching the light in a way that shows it isn't one green but many. The blades can be skinny or broad, but in this field they are packed so tightly he can't see the earth beneath.

In this spring that is so rich in rain, and on the good black soil of the district, each one has grown so tall he would have to walk as if he was on the moon. The recent rain lies in beads that transfer to his boots and soak into the socks he had pulled up high over his pants. The birds sing like they've never seen a dawn so fresh. Tooru could see this a hundred times over and never tire of it.

It was the field they went to together all those years ago, the same field with bright yellow sunflowers that reflected of the bright sun perfectly. The large ditch-well, ravine, in the middle of the field. Funnily enough Tooru came here many times after graduating, it was the only place he would spread his wings and fly freely, just above the ravine like he had that day. To remind himself Possibly. Except there was no sun now. In fact by this point the moon was starting to come up.

Iwaizumi of course was still running after him and only stopped when he felt a gust a wind suddenly hitting him. A somewhat familiar feeling and he was right to think so as he looked up and saw Oikawa.

His wings hadn't changed much, they just looked less cared for and slightly bashed even. But the moonlight reflecting off them made them beautiful "H-Hey Oikawa?..."

He couldn't breath, it felt as if someone was choking him. His heart was racing and all he wanted to do was curl up into a ball and wait for someone to save him. But no one would, no one was there. A choked cry for help forced itself up his throat, and he felt a drop run down his cheek. Tooru was a broken soul. He needed someone to pick up the pieces of his heart and mend them together again. He wanted help he really did.

But his pride wouldn't let him ask for it.

It must've been an hour of just staring at each other. Oikawa crying was he hovered and looked down at his ex-lover. Iwaizumi Just stared back with what you could almost assume to be an unbothered expression. However his eyes gave it away. His slightly teary eyes that revealed at his pulled heartstrings. "Tooru...can you come down? I know your angry, I know your hurt but can we please just talk?"

The brunette wiped his eyes and inhaled a sharp and shaky breath before flying closer to the ground and letting his wings disappear before landing softly on the grassy floor just off the ravine. "Y-y...yes Hajime?"

Stuttering shows weakness. Tooru didn't stutter much.

But he's anxious. It comes as an electrical storm in his brain that, quite honestly, is painful. It's different from a headache and it feels the same as intense sorrow, perhaps as a sort of frozen panic with nowhere to go. So though he appears calm, his sad eyes are saying far more than "Help me," they are saying that my soul is in such unbearable pain and all for the lack of real love. "Help me Iwa-chan"

And for what seemed like an eternity they both stood there after oikawa spoke those words. Mostly Iwaizumi was taking time to process it.
"I'll help" he paused
"If you let me"

Oikawa always found forgiving himself impossible, and so created his own emotional scars. Yet he wanted others to forgive themselves. It was an endless cycle that never worked and never would. "You don't want to help me, your just saying that..."

The only person who has enough of you to break your heart, they are perfect for you, whether this fact is acknowledged or not. You see your soulmate's flaws. All of them. Nothing can change your love. They make you want to be a better person, to be good enough. And no matter how hard you try, you never will be, or at least you think you won't.

Sometimes you love a soulmate, but not romantically. You find a person who can make you laugh, make you question everything, and change you for the better. Iwaizumi was Oikawa's soulmate whether he liked this fact or not. But neither of them knew it apart from that tingling feeling in the back of their minds. But hey? Everyone has to learn where they fit in eventually.

"Why would I lie to the only person who stayed?" At this Tooru seemed to look up from the floor and cast his gaze to Iwaizumi. Maybe they could relate on some level

"Then why would I stay with the only person who I thought never would?" But Tooru wasn't in the mood to hear it.

"I know your angry...I would be to but...just hand me your phone?" Iwaizumi asked as he reached his hand out to Oikawa. The brunette was hesitant at first before he took out his phone from his jacket pocket. "I can't tell what your trying to p-"

"Here, it's my new number" Iwaizumi cut him off before he could finish and handed the other back his phone. Tooru didn't even have time to react as Iwaizumi patted him in the shoulder and left.

Tooru stood in that exact spot to process everything and by the time he decided to leave it was dark out. "I'm still wearing this fucking apron-" he curses quietly before making his wings invisible and making his slow walk back home. He didn't have a car so it was all he could do.

Upon returning home he noticed once again the lack of car in the driveway. His parents again were yet to return.

Every emotion he felt over the course of today drained him completely to a point he couldn't cry any more.
So he ate half an apple and threw the bit he didn't eat in the food bin. Everything was so dreary in the house, everything brought him back to the loneliness he felt and could never really say.

So he spent the early hours of the morning listening to Chopin and Beethoven which he found a surprisingly good thing to listen to at such a time of day.

It wasn't till around 3am did he get a buzz from his phone, subsequently disturbing his music. Tooru groaned at the buzz, who was possibly texting him at this time anyway?

Iwaizumi.
It was Iwaizumi

From: Iwa-chan!🏐💙

Hey, I thought i should text you..I'm really sorry about everything today. I know you to well and yes I do remember how you saved my name in high school 'Iwa-chan!🏐💙'

Meet me at the library near the sports shop in town tomorrow, 1 O'clock sharp shittykawa. I know your always late.

Seeing the message at first made him question how Iwaizumi even remembered how Tooru had saved the others name in his phone. But yet a tiny little smile, a quirk of his lips pointing upwards that he didn't even realise he was doing was clear on his face. It reminded him of high school and that giddy feeling he got when the ravenette would text him.

Maybe they could start again.

A/n
Ahh I sorta love this chapter but also hate it- votes and comments are appreciated!