💛 Yellow is a Happy Color. 💚 Demus.✔

Chapter 5.

TW: HINTING SELFHARM AND EATING DISORDER BUT NOTHING MUCH

DISCLAIMER: I WILL BE USING JANUS' NAME IN 3RD POV, JANUS POV, AND DIARY UNTIL HE REVEALS IT IN MY BOOK!

JANUS = DECEIT

3RD POV:

Janus woke up, "Hm.." he looked around drowsy, "Oh yeah, I passed out.." he mumbled. Even getting out of bed was difficult. He usually never got out of bed unless to get some green tea, change for the light sides debates, and if Remus needed him. But right now, he was entirely useless. He thought nobody knew his depressing act, but Remus saw through it, because he too felt like that. But with the help of Emile, Remy, Roman, and Janus, he was able to push through it, obviously it's not gone but very less intrusive.

He always said Janus was a good actor, "Deeeeeee, are you awakeeeee?" he heard Remus call, "Uhhh... No?" Janus called back, oh how much he wanted to tell Remus his name, "Okay, coming in." Remus bursted through the door, "Whattup double Dee!" He said, sitting on the end of his bed, "Nothing, Mus'" he waved him off. "I mean, why were you on the floor yesterday?" he asked, concerned. "Eh, I passed out, nothing too serious." he smiled reassuringly to him. "DeeDee, That is serious.. Why did you pass out?" he asked, Janus looked away, "I ran out of breath, I couldnt breathe." he said quietly, "Awh.. Whys that?" he asked, in a soft- well the softest voice he could. "No reason, how about a new subject!" Janus said quickly.

"I- Fine.." Remus said, disappointed, which made Janus shattered, he didn't mean too.. "What was the conversion about yesterday?" he asked, "The conversation was about Thomas' friend being depressed but would unfriend him if he told anyone that she was depressed. So I came to the conclusion to call a hotline and tell them her problems were mine and use their advice to help his friend." Janus explained and Remus nodded. "Nice problem solving.." he said. "Thanks."

Janus wrapped his arms around his stomach, "Are you okay, Dee?" Remus asked and Janus was quick to nod, "Yeah, just stomach problems.." he said, "You should eat.-" Remus suggested, "YES- NO!" he said loudly and quickly, "Jeez- Why not?"

"It'll make me.. sick- like throw up." he lied, Remus frowned, "Okay.. Could I get you anything?" he asked, "Could you please make some Green Tea- If you're able to..?" he asked, and Remus nodded, "I'll be back, Deeeee." Remus left.

Janus sighed, that was extremely close.. He snuggled into his blankets more. He loved depression naps but could never seem to sleep.. He was getting lost in self doubt when Remus came in, "Heres your green tea!" He smiled, putting the tea on his nightstand. "Do you want me to leave?" Remus asked, "No no, you can stay." Janus smiled. Remus smiled relaxed and sat at the edge of his bed, "You're a really good actor, Double D..." Remus said randomly.

Janus raised a brow, "What do you mean..?" he asked Remus, feeling he knows something, "How you hide behind that smile, I know." he said, still smiling, "I dont hide behind this smile." he said, that smile dropping to a frown, "DeeDee, I know because I've been through this, you have to trust me, I can help." He said, though Remus knows about how he hides behind that smile, he doesnt know what's under his sleeves, gloves, or how empty that stomach is.

"Please stop, you're scaring me- making me uncomfortable.." Janus said, shaking, "Oh-! Sorry Deceit- I was- Sorry.." he said, exiting Janus' room.

Dear Diary,
So far, today hasn't been as bad.
Hes catching on, I need more paint. I'm running out. I need more. Hes going to be mad when finds out what's under my sleeve.
I'm such a good actor.
But hes such a good critic.

- Janus ♡

A/N: SOOOOO, I hope I didnt dissapoint. I'm sorry this was so short. Its only 690, I will do better next time, I promise. Ily guys, wash your hands, social distance, sleep sleep night night, later busters.

I'm tryna get 690 words hold on.. hhh.. :) DONE, yay!