12. Trauma

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Nightmares plagued my dreams, making me shoot up from my bed, breaths laboured, tears falling.

It's been a year since Joe was caught and arrested . The evidence combined with what he did to me landed him life in prison, and yet I'm still plagued with horrid memories of him.

I got up from bed, I glanced at the clock while making my way downstairs to the kitchen . It was two in the morning .

After Joe was arrested, Conor and Jack took me in. I didn't trust anyone else So I was glad that they agreed . However, since I wasn't eighteen quite yet I couldn't just move in. So Conor agreed to foster me, which was really weird, because he turned my foster "father". He never missed an opportunity to tease me about that.

Alot of people were against it too. People from foster care didn't want me to stay with two grown men, not after what happened to me. Being a psychiatrist himself, Conor faught them at every turn, he understood me and what I was going through. Eventually they gave in and allowed me to stay with the boys.

After few months of staying with them, I found my voice back.  There wasn't a physical reason why I  couldn't talk, it was all mental, so I tried and tried and tried  until one day I managed to croak some  words out .

I turned eighteen a few months back, so now I can make my own decisions without being treated like a child incapable of making sound decisions .

The lights were on when I entered the kitchen and there was an empty cup that once held coffee.

Jack probably had one of his nightmares again. They've been happening for sometime now. Two days before my birthday he told me what happened , and why they were out in the woods.

Apparently, his sister was brutally raped and murdered. He was the one that found her body.

Jack told me that he was suppose to pick her up from school, she had to stay back late for extra classes.

He forgot and ended up getting there later than usual and that's when he found  her beaten and bruised body, lying at the back of the school. He's never been the same since.

Just thinking about it makes me want to burst into tears. Tears for Jack and Conor and what they've been through and for the sister that never had a chance to live past the age of seventeen. 

As Jack said, 

"The three of us have been through our own hell and faught our own battles. We've been through a lot of trauma. I only hope that we can heal...together as a family."

He's been more open about his feelings lately and he's getting better.

I can't say the same for me though.

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