Jilted Junkies :||: Kenny x Reader || South Park Fanfiction

Chapter Twenty-Six

[Mysterion's Point of View]

I made sure everything was set. We staked out the area for an advantage. We had planned the whole thing accordingly. Coon knew my offer for a peace agreement would be suspicious, that's why I was positive he would bring the colossal Professor Chaos. We mapped out the area, and for hours we discussed a plan of taking him out. We had a signal. A single word that would cause everyone to jump out and attack.

Soon we were ready. I stood in the middle of the junk yard as everyone took their places. Once I looked around and concluded that I couldn't see anyone, I waited. I checked my watch every five minutes. My foot tapped impatiently against the ground. It smelled like shit around here, but I was slowly getting use to it.

Finally I saw him walking with that beast of a boy named Butters. They looked calm, but I could tell the Coon was searching around for the rest of the gang. They both stopped in front of me and we made eye contact for a long few seconds.

"Took you long enough." I sighed in that voice I always do.

"Fashionably late." Coon shrugged, gesturing to Chaos' tin-foil helmet.

"So... our peace agreement." I began.

"Right. About that, Kenny... I think we should set up a couple regulations for this uh... 'peace agreement'." He said, using his claws to do finger quotes. I let out a breath through my nose, crossing my arms.

"What?" I asked coldly.

"Well... I want you guys to apologize, firstly... Then, for trying to destroy my game account, I want you all to destroy your most valuable gaming consoles. If you can't do that, then I can't declare a truce." He told me matter-of-factually. I rolled my eyes.

"Okay. What else?" I asked. His eyes shot open and he blinked at me.

"Wait... wait, seriousleh...?" He laughed.

"Well... me and the gang had a long talk the other night. I've been trying to get back at you for days and... the truth is, I just want to forget everything and move on... If a peace treaty will put an end to my involvement with this, we'll do it." I bluffed. But he seemed to buy it. He looked at Chaos, and back at me.

"Huh... okay... well in that case, I also want four thousand dollars in cash by the end of the week for my campaign." He smirked, crossing his own lardy arms.

"Four thousand, huh?" I raised an eyebrow at him.

"That's right. If you can't do that, then no peace agreement." He repeated his words.

"I'm sure you want the new Death Stranding game and about five bags of Doritos too, huh?" I asked him sarcastically.

"Uh... yeah that doesn't sound too bad." He smiled.

"Well... I can probably get that arranged, pork-chop." I said.

"Okay, well then- wait... what did you just say?" He paused in realization.

"I said I can have that arranged for you..." I walked up closer to him then yelled in his face: "PORK CHOP!"

Suddenly my crew came flooding in from all directions, letting out a battle cry. Coon gasped, then snapped his fingers. Professer Chaos stood tall, and as soon as Toolshed jumped at him with his drill, it only took one hard knock to the gut to send him flying twenty feet back.

"Shit..." I said. But it wasn't long before Human Kite, Wonder Tweek, and Mosquito were already following suit with our plan. Human Kite jumped up from behind and wrapped his hands around his eyes. Then the other two squeezed around each of his huge forearms. He easily lifted them from the ground and started flailing about.