Sakura (How to Obtain a Reverse Harem in Naruto)

I Can't Cake My Eyes Off You!

I'm publishing the first five chapters of my original story (Dawn of the Rose) on wattpad for free so that way I can hopefully transition it to being a paid story on wattpad for more accessibility. Any support tossed that way would be greatly appreciated! Thank you.

"People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day."

-Anon

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. I wish I did. But I don't.

Warning: To hell with logic and tragedy!

I give up. Someone PM me on tumblr and beta this story for me. ;-; Please. Halp.

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By the poolside, I sat criss-cross on a comfortable lounging chair. On the chair next to me was a relaxed Kakashi, sipping some fruity drink while in a black swimming top (to obviously keep his face covered) and puppy-print trunks.

"Ahh! Stop—blrrgh—Neji!" Naruto cried out as Neji tried to drown him after Hinata came out of the locker room.

Darling Hinata looked absolutely amazing in her one piece and skirt, and unfortunately Naruto couldn't help but make a comment.

Neji, who was in the pool with Naruto, did not appreciate said comment.

"Sai, as Naruto's Butt Advocate, you must make sure he stays alive so more people can appreciate his butt," I reminded the pale boy. Sai, who was perfectly content sitting at the pool side with his legs in the water while he chatted with Ino, gave me a dead serious nod before going off to rescue Naruto.

"Why don't I have a Butt Advocate?" Ino pondered.

"I'll be your Butt Advocate when you turn eighteen," I immediately offered, not looking up from what I was sketching.

Ino perked up at that.

Tenten, lounging a ways from us, sighed audibly from that and gave me a tired look. "What are you even doing, Sakura?"

"Currently? Designing the cake I'm going to pop out of when I'm eighteen for Kisame," I answered absently.

Kakashi cleared his throat. "Why are you jumping out of the cake?"

"Because I want to," I said with a grin. "I can jump out for you, sensei."

"Nope. Hard pass on that," Kakashi cheerfully replied. "Have you been doing that this entire time?"

"No, I was working on the menu at Cafe Neko Fetish."

"What?"

"I'm still deciding on the name," I confessed. "It'll come to me, I'm sure."

"Please don't name it Neko Fetish," Shikamaru deadpanned from across the pool.

"Well I can't just call it Hot Men and Women in Cat Uniforms!" I retorted, then thought. "HMAWICA?"

"How do you even pronounce that?" Sasori asked, aghast.

"Why did they have to give you money for that idea?" Kakuzu questioned.

I ignored my snarky companions, returning back to work on my ever important design for Kisame.

After all, Pein would be attacking Konoha this week. Even without Jiraya's intervention he always attacked Konoha on the same damn day every life unless I had been actively preventing it from day one. It actually made me question if there was a higher force at play. Maybe Kishimoto was a true god and could use Plot-no-Jutsu to keep certain events from ever changing.