soulmates ( completed )

eight.

craig:

after leo was done screaming at sam, the silence was loud and clouding my mind with dark thoughts. i didn't want to look up because i know what he'd think of me, my ex and my everything. i was just so fucking sad, sam found out before i could tell him. i was happy he told me the truth but sad to know that he knew everything. everything jesse promised me not to tell anyone else, not even his own family. it would spread and i would be taken away, away from lynn, away from leo, jay and ruth. 

leo slumped down next to me, his clothed arm rested on my shoulders that were still shaking, i knew sam was still there because i could see his shoes. i just sighed, wiping the tears and snot from my face with my hoodie. i stared at the rips of my jeans and the noses of my shoes as i felt sam sit down next to me. i just kinda scooted away from him, closer to leo, closer to someone i was safe with. leo didn't say anything, he was fucking silent. silence is the worst, it fills your head with the grimmest of thoughts, the fucking stupidest shit would make you feel like killing yourself. silence was like my dad, but worse. 

"why did you have to know?" i managed to open my mouth and to let a small, worthless blurb of words enter the air, "why?" sam didn't answer, nor did leo, i was just left with another pause of silence, i clamped my mouth shut as more tears just dropped onto the greyish tiles of the 2nd floor boys bathroom. i lifted my upper body and i leant against the wall, just closing my eyes so i didn't have to look at him. i didn't want to see his sorry face, i just didn't. 

"i was worried about you," sam said, filling the air with melancholy as he spoke, "i was so scared, scared about what you said and joked about, scared what you did to yourself. jesse never told me about the bruises on your arms, i saw them myself."

i just nodded, still with my eyes squeezed shut and leo's arm wrapped around my still trembling shoulder. tears were still coming down my face, but now i felt embarrassed, i was crying in front of the fucking guy who's been my crush since i came out. wow. "what about the scars?" leo now spoke, his voice not much better than sam's, "you found out because of jesse?" 

i opened my eyes but i didn't look to my left or my right, just straight ahead. i saw sam nod in the corner of my eye, it was blurry because of the tears brimming in it. i looked at myself in the mirror, i looked like shit so i kept on looking. just seeing my usually styled black hair as a mess and my eyes red just made me contemplate my worth evenmore. sam's wavy brown hair was visible and leo's straight blond, nearly white, hair was also visible in the mirror. i could barely make out sam's piercing green eyes and leo's face was completely gone, just his hair. 

"did i ever tell you about how much i hate jesse, leopold?" i chuckled, smiling at myself in the mirror, "so fucking much, probably more than how much--" leopold covered my mouth, knowing what i was about to say. i looked at him for the first time in our time in the bathroom.

"think about what you going to say, dipshit," he flicked my forehead, "we don't want 'you-know-who' to know more than he already does, more than what you expected, okay?" i nodded as i looked at sam, who's dead silent. his usual facial expression was gone and now all i saw was not like him. he was looking at me, his eyes fixed on my gaze and his mouth clamped shut.

"i probably shouldn't have come here," he spoke again, less emotion than last time, but enough to let me know that he probably felt like fucking shit, "i'm sorry, so fucking sorry, i'll tell whoever our fucking sub is that you guys are here," he stood up, and looked at me again. i looked back at him and i felt several spark go off in my stomach.

"thanks, sam."

"you shouldn't be thanking the one that hurt you, craig," he just stood still, "you should really fix that, you forgive too easily, forget too quickly," he crouched down to my eye level and he fixed my hair with his left hand, "i hope you'll still come to the party, not for me, but for you," he stood up again and walked away. i turned to leo and i started crying again, leo patted my back and let me cry in his shoulder.

sam:

i walk into the classroom, there is still no teacher. i sit down next to jake who passes me my bag. i lean back so i can kick my feet onto the table. jake does the same, i turn around to see jay and ruth laughing. a couple of moments later, leo walks into the classroom with craig's hoodie in hand. he walks up to jay and he whispers into his ear, jay nods and hands him his bag, i watch leo take out his hoodie before jogging out of the classroom. jake catches me staring.

"what were you doing in the bathroom?" he waves his hand in front of my face, "earth to tucker?" i shake my head and i look at him.

"apologizing," i look at him, "i was apologizing," jake nods before winking at roxanne who just winks back, "what am i supposed to suspect tomorrow?"

"you mean your b-day, sammyboy?" jake chuckles, "well, you kinda feel this burning sensation for about half a minute and then voila! a tattoo of a name, which is thy soulmate!" i roll my eyes, jake rolls up his sleeve to show his tattoo on his wrist, 'roxanne' with angel wings, which is just fucking cringy.

"aight," i nod, "that's lowkey--" i look at kyle, he looks at me and flips me off.

kinda cool.