TeamFortress2's New Addition

Chapter Forty-Three

"Yes, Engie?" You prompted him, the tone of your voice sounding as out of it as you were. I really don't want to talk right now. I don't even think I can.

"May I come in?" He asked tentatively, as if he was testing the waters and hesitant to step in. He then gestured to your room with his hat. You nodded solemnly, stepping aside to let him in. He placed it back on his head as he walked inside and sat on your bed. Oh boy. "I suppose I should explain myself."

"I would appreciate that, yeah. You scared the crap out of me," you offered him a small smile and took a seat on your desk chair. He rubbed his hand across his forehead, nodding as he leaned forward. He rested his elbows on his knees. He looked about as exhausted as you felt. You both sat in uncomfortable silence as his gaze seemed to be fixed on the ground. I don't want to be rude, but this really isn't accomplishing anything.

You looked around your room before stopping yourself, coming to a realization. You slowly moved your widened gaze back to the unmoving Texan, and realized that what he was doing reminded you of what you yourself would do. It wasn't as if you were ever quick to solve any problems, and when you were confronted you closed yourself off. You didn't want to admit anything and you couldn't find the words you wanted to use. Is that what's happening?

You had to take a different approach to how you saw this. It just feels so off to see someone who usually has it all together be closed off like this. However, it doesn't make them any less of a human after all, huh?

"Um, Engie?" You tried to speak with the gentlest voice you could muster, trying to sound as comforting as possible. You saw his ear perked up at the sound of your voice in the silence. He slowly lifted his head to look at you. His expression was that of a man who was utterly ashamed, and it caught you off guard. You immediately figured that maybe this conversation could happen tomorrow. I'm not usually the one in this position, and I don't know how to handle it! "D-did you want to talk about this later?"

"No." He shook his head, gritting his teeth. "No, I came in here to talk about this now. I just don't really know how ta say..." He trailed off, sighing and motioning with his hands as if trying to hold the sentences he couldn't seem to conjure. You nodded, completely understanding what that's like. That's why he was so quiet.

"Yeah, I've been there." You let out an almost pitiful laugh. You know that. "...How about starting with why you were acting so strange at dinner?" He gave a slight nod.

"Yeah, you're right. Well, (Y/n), I'm a practical man ya see. Heck, I work with machines for my job!" He started motioning with his hands. You were slightly taken aback by how he used your real name. Why did he do that? Still, you nodded for him to continue while giving a small smile for encouragement.

"What I mean is, when I saw you walk back together with Demoman all happy for probably the first time ya've been here, I was so relieved that I thought everthin' was fine," he admitted, shaking his head slowly. "I didn't take inta account how'd ya really react after what happen'd with Medic. Then, I embarrassed both of us at lunch n' I couldn't even tell ya were shakin'! I just wanted ya to be alright, I thought ya were, and I pressed that on ya unfairly. It was disgraceful. For that, I'm sorry."

"Well," you felt a bit taken aback, but you weren't completely surprised either. "I understand what your thought process was, and to be honest, I wish you were right. This has been a stupid mess. You're forgiven... Engie." It would make sense that a logical person like him would just believe everything would be fine. Unfortunately, the thought of trying to talk to Medic again chilled you to the bone. A small, yet noticeable smile formed on Engie's lips as he sat more upright.

"Thank ya kindly, darlin'. It means a lot ta me that you'd say that." He took off his hat to run his hand over his head. You returned the smile and nodded. "Y'know, once ya left everyone chewed me up and spat me back out." He started a hearty chuckle and you joined in. I feel like I would have heard that, though.